I'm sorry I didn't update yesterday - I'm making three or four updates a day at the moment and I'm finding it really difficult to keep up with them all. Thank you for the amazing reviews!
ETWentHome, thank you for your review. It really is amazing that you're enjoying all the different storylines so much. A lot of people don't like Louis, but I really want to believe there's hope for him. I'm not sure how Ethan would cope if Cal dies - but I need to work it out if I'm going to write it!
Tanith Panic, I'm glad you're going to forgive Lofty - I think he does have a naïve side to him, but he can also be the most insightful person in the hospital. Robyn would be the perfect friend - she's sweet, kind, and maybe she'd introduce me to Cal and Ethan! Thank you for your review.
Tato Potato, Max probably has suffered enough lately, though I still might kill him if the mood takes me. I had to keep Ethan with Cal - can you imagine how much everyone would complain if I denied them a chance of brotherly fluff? Thank you for your review!
Georgy-Girl, thank you for your review - I'm really happy you like the way I write Lily. She is quite a difficult character to write, but completely fascinating. I'd definitely like to write more about her in the future.
Connie paced up and down the relatives' room. At first, she'd tried to pretend she was striding about in a commanding manner (though obviously not in a way designed to attract Jacob's attention), but now she was definitely pacing.
"Sit down!" said Jacob. "You're making me tired just looking at you."
"Oh, so you do get tired?" said Connie.
"Oh, yes," said Jacob. His eyes met hers. "And when I get tired, there's only one thing I can do: go to bed."
Connie met his eyes with almost perfect composure. "Don't let me stop you. I'll be fine. I won't miss you." She sat down and turned pointedly away.
Jacob laughed. "That's what all the girls say when they're playing hard to get."
"I'm not playing," said Connie.
Jacob's voice was serious. "Neither am I."
The door opened. "Connie and Jacob, isn't it?"
Connie looked up. Her lips parted to say she was Mrs Beauchamp, but the expression on the nurse's face stopped her. It was an expression she knew well.
She shot to her feet. "Oh God: has something happened to Charlie?"
She felt Jacob's hand on her arm and decided it would be cruel to shake it off. Jacob was probably really worried.
The nurse shook her head sadly. "No, it's not Charlie. He's doing very well and his son is obviously a great comfort to him."
If Connie weren't a lady, she would certainly have snorted.
"It's Rita, Connie." The nurse's gaze was sympathetic. "We did everything we could, but I'm afraid we lost her. I'm very sorry to be giving you such sad news."
Honey looked up as Lily entered. She heard a soft gasp from Robyn and felt the nurse shrinking against her.
"Come on, Lily," said Honey. "Do your worst."
Lily gave her an icy look. "While I would not wish to promote false hope, I do understand the necessity of being kind to the relatives of patients."
Honey was slightly annoyed to discover Lily had a point. "Good for you. It's good you get the chance to learn things like that now you're on the register."
"Registrar!" Lily's glare could have turned a lesser woman to stone.
"On the registra: that's what I said," said Honey. She frowned. "Does that even make sense?"
"It does not," said Lily.
"Please," said Robyn as her eyes desperately fixed on Lily. "Please tell me."
Lily sat beside Robyn. "Max is alive. He has avoided renal failure. He also had a pneumothorax which has been treated with a chest drain. He has four fractured ribs, which will take perhaps ten weeks to mend, but I predict a full recovery."
Robyn's face lit up. "Thank you, Lily!" She flung her arms around the surprised… was it regeesta? To rhyme with barista? Honey decided this wasn't the time to ask.
"You're welcome, Nurse Miller," said Lily, her back very stiff. "I will let you know when you can see him. Zoe is seeing him first as she is his wife."
Robyn's expression darkened. "That's a matter of opinion."
"How's Ethan and Cal doing?" asked Honey, partly to change the subject and partly because she wanted to know.
"Cal has had a craniotomy and is now in intensive care," said Lily.
"Intensive care?" said Honey. "Isn't that for people who are in, like, comas?"
"It is for people who are critically ill," said Lily. "Some are comatose. Cal is sedated. His pulmonary system has failed so he is using a ventilator. I believe Ethan is with him."
"Oh, I love ventilators," said Honey. "They give such a nice, cool breeze. What's wrong with his hands, though?"
Lily frowned. "His hands? I believe he has a fractured triquetrum and also a fractured zygomatic bone."
"Trick what?" said Honey. "Is that one of his ribs? Men have false ribs, don't they? Because God made a woman out of it? And what were you saying about the zygons? Is Cal possessed?"
"Of course he's not possessed," snapped Lily.
"And what's wrong with his palms?" said Honey.
"There is nothing wrong with his palms."
Honey was confused. "But you said his palmistry system failed."
Robyn touched her arm gently. She was a bit tearful, but she managed to smile at Honey. "The pulmonary system is the lungs. Cal's lungs aren't working at the moment so he's using a machine called a ventilator to help him breathe, but he'll be able to breathe again soon. He's also broken a zygomatic bone, which is his cheekbone, and his triquetrum, which is a bone in his wrist." Robyn sniffed, then spoke bravely. "You can go up and see Ethan if you want. He probably needs a bit of support. I'll be fine."
Honey was torn. She felt mean about leaving Robyn, but she knew Ethan would need her. Ethan was a superhero, but he loved his brother.
"Here we are," said Lofty as they finally reached Resus.
Zoe felt relief, then panic. She was used to seeing people attached to machines with tubes coming out of various parts of their anatomy, but this was Max. "I don't think I can do this."
Lofty knelt in front of her wheelchair. "We don't have to go in if you're not ready. But you're one of the bravest women I've ever met, Zoe Hanna, and I believe you can do this."
"I suppose I did marry Max," said Zoe with a shaky laugh. "Despite his mother. If I can do that, I'm game for anything."
She flinched slightly as she remembered that 'being game for anything' was part of the problem.
Lofty, fortunately, either didn't notice what she'd said or was too tactful to respond. "Exactly: you wouldn't catch me marrying Max!" said Lofty. An awkward look came over his face. "No offence. But marrying your best mate… it doesn't really appeal."
"It's okay," said Zoe. "I love Tess to bits, but I don't think I'd want to marry her. Even though I'm sure I couldn't find a better wife." She looked at the doors of Resus again and breathed deeply. "Okay. I can do this. I'm ready."
Lofty smiled and rested his hands briefly on hers. "Then let's do it."
Dylan was fine to begin with. His priority was to treat the patient.
Even when the meaning of Zoe's words began to penetrate his mind, he hadn't been upset. He'd simply noted the fact that the words had been said and that it hadn't prevented him from doing his job. Although by most doctors' standards, it was a small thing, Dylan was sufficiently accepting of his condition to understand that this was a positive sign which perhaps even counted as a small achievement.
He made a mental note to tell Ben Harding about it in his next session.
Then he'd started thinking about what the words really meant.
Zoe had said his checklists were silly. She'd poked fun at the fact he was in therapy. Zoe was supposed to be his friend.
Was she his friend?
Dylan found some paper and a pen and wrote two lists. The first list contained Zoe's continued attempts to persuade him to confide in her; arranging therapy sessions and taking the time to talk to him about them; her requests to Connie to give Dylan more time; her insistence that no-one but Dylan could give her away at her wedding.
The second list said that although the above conversations with Zoe had always started well, 75% of them had ended in Zoe getting impatient and cross. And his response to finding Zoe in tears on his boat was probably more supportive than her response to seeing him collapsed on the floor of Resus, covered in blood.
The first list was longer, but it had four items. Dylan did know, some of the time, that four was just a number and coincidences did happen, but now he was starting to worry.
The more he worried, the more irrational his thoughts became. He realised he was heading for a meltdown and stopped for a moment, trying to think of his coping strategies.
One coping strategy stood out above all others.
Talking to Lofty.
Ethan sat beside Cal, holding his hand and trying not to cry. He'd kept control when he'd had to. He'd treated Cal's wrist and facial injuries; he'd assisted the surgeon when requested; and he'd helped him transfer Cal to the intensive care unit.
But now, all he could do was sit beside Cal and wait. The ventilator was breathing for him and the intracranial monitor was recording the pressure in Cal's skull, ready to alert the nurse attending him if there were any changes.
"Caleb," said Ethan, as a tear rolled down his cheek. "I'm sorry. It's all my fault. I know I might have to say all this again when you wake up and maybe it's cowardly of me to say it to you now when you can't reply, but I can't just pretend it didn't happen." He wiped the tear away with his hand. "Cal, I wasn't in the hospital when the bomb scare happened. I got a text from Honey saying she was moving back to Manchester with another man. I did something you would never have done: I left without telling anyone. As soon as I heard about the incident, I came back to the hospital, but I was too late. You were already in there. In danger. Because of me." Ethan sobbed as more tears fell. "You even turned your back on Taylor because I meant more to you. I know we don't always get on, but when I need someone to protect me, you're always there. You're my safety net and my hero, and I couldn't manage without you. I'm so, so sorry." Ethan stroked Cal's hand as the tears overwhelmed him. "I love you, Cal."