Chapter 31

"You know what, why don't you all just kill me. Finish me off, right here and now. At least I won't have clumps of my hair falling out and permanent bags under my eyes." I said, flapping my books around in the air.

Remus looked up from the book, "Well maybe if you payed attention in class things like this wouldn't happen." He said, a smug grin on his face. If he wasn't my best friend I would have thrown him out of the window.

"I feel like I'm going to bloody explode." James said, running a hand through his hair as he scribbled something down.

Sirius scoffed, "You're telling me - I'm so exhausted, the other day I woke up with books next to me. I had so much to do I actually fell asleep while working. Who does that? I used to wake up next to girls and now I wake up next to potion book volume six." Sirius said, sighing. He then turned to me and realised what he had just said, which gave me a wicked idea.

James turned to Sirius, 'You shouldn't have said that, mate." he muttered.

I raised my eyebrows at him, "Oh, so you miss waking up next to girls don't you?" I said feigning anger. I wasn't actually upset at him, I just loved seeing Sirius look panicked, it was genuinely amusing.

Sirius's eyes widened, 'Oh shite, sorry - I didn't mean it like that. I don't actually miss those girls," He said, awkwardly. "I forgot we were dating for a second."

"Oh really? Then why'd you say it, Paddycakes? D'you miss snogging Jenny Andrews in the broom closet or maybe Hellen Merrywether, what did you say about her? Quiet in the streets, wild in the sheets?" I said, narrowing my eyes at him.

Sirius's eyes darted between me and the boys who avoided his gaze, it was as if he was saying 'help me' with his eyes. Sirius turned to me, a look of pure terror on his face. I couldn't help it, I broke out into a fit of giggles. His face was too amusing, I couldn't resist laughing.

"I don't know what's happening right now." Sirius said, not sure whether to laugh with me or not.

"You think I actually bloody care about your past relationships, if I could call them that." I said, laughing. "Of course not."

Sirius looked so confused. "You don't? Is this a joke?" He asked, bemused.

I rolled my eyes, "Of course not, you bloody idiot. It's not about what you did, it's about what you do now. Remember that." I said, with a small nod. Sirius seemed to absorb my words like a sponge and his eyes flickered away from me and to the book in his hands, a pensive look on his face.

"Right, that's enough of that. We need to get back to studying. We haven't even began the goblin revolution," Remus said, a frustrated look on his face. Poor kid had been helping us all day.

We were sitting in the library having a group study session which basically consisted of Remus explaining everything we had missed over the past couple of months, which was almost everything. Our idea of studying was mainly trying to cram as much information into our brains over a short period of time, which never seemed to end well.

It was finals week, or as I liked to call it, The week of hell. It had only been a week since we had returned from the christmas break and here we were getting tested. That meant that we had to spend all our days and nights studying, revising and taking more notes than usual, which also meant that it was the end of our social life, or any life at all.

James rolled his eyes at me, "Winnie, quit the dramatics. You do this every year, you complain and nag and then end up getting one of the highest scores. We're the ones who should be complaining!" he said, ushering to Peter and Sirius who were staring blankly at their books looking like they had no idea what was going on, which was probably true.

I scoffed, "Oh is that right, James Potter?" I said putting my hands on my hips.

He nodded, pointing his quill at me. "Yeah, it is right." James said blatantly.

"Tell that to the big fat E I got on my last exam! My mum almost disowned me. You know what, that's it - no more sleep. No more relaxation. It's studying time!" I said, banging my fist on the table.

Remus laughed, "That's the spirit, Win! Now back to what I was saying, wood nymphs are known to-" Remus started to say before he was cut off by a loud groan.

Sirius ran a hand through his hair, "Remus mate, I'm sorry but I can't do this anymore, we need to take a break. We've been studying for ages!" he said, frustratedly.

Remus scoffed, glancing at the clock on the wall sitting opposite us, "What? We've only been studying for two hours, we haven't even covered the functions of mildew yet!" he said, looking at us in disbelief.

We all gave him a blank look, one that very obviously and loudly said, 'are you kidding me?'

Remus sighed, "Okay, I guess we can take a five minute break. There's a recent study that shows that taking breaks is very good, so yes. Let's take a break. Shall we?" Remus said, shutting the book reluctantly.

I put my hair up in a bun, "When I said I wanted to make this year the best year ever, this was not exactly what I had in mind." I said, staring sadly at the books that lay in front of me.

"Oh yeah, how is that going by the way?" Remus said, laughing.

"It's going quite terribly, actually. I feel like I have achieved and done nothing this year." I said, a frown on my face as I hugged my knees.

Sirius laughed, throwing a hand across my shoulder. "Hey, it could be worse. You could not be dating me." He said, an arrogant smile on his face. I knew that he was purposely trying to wind me up.

"Oh, however would I live." I rolled my eyes at him, "Oh, I know - quite peacefully." I said, with a small smirk.

Sirius looked at me like I was an alien, "How could you even say that? I don't know how you managed to utter those very words." He said, biting down at the end of his pen, still looking outraged.

"Wait, so are you two dating or are you fake-dating?" Peter said, tilting his head to the side.

Sirius and I made eye contact, "Both." We answered simultaneously which resulted in a victorious high-five and equally large smile. In honesty, we had no idea whether we were dating or fake dating, but we had come to the conclusion that we don't bloody care. We liked each other and that was what mattered, wasn't it?

James laughed, "Pete, mate - you need to keep up mate. Next thing you know they're married and you're still wondering when they went out on their first date!" He exclaimed.

I had just taken a sip from my water, "Marriage?!" I said, almost choking on the water. "Slow down there, Prongs." I said, while Remus proceeded to pat my back.

Peter stared at us, "Don't you two want to marry each other?" he said, a look of pure shock on his face.

Sirius leaned back into his chair, crossing his arms. "How am I supposed to explain it to your beautifully simple mind, Pete. Okay, how about this. Imagine the perfect couple, all happy and smiley. Imagine me taking Winnie to Madam Puddy's and maybe eventually getting married and having three children." He said, nodding. "Did you imagine all that?"

Peter scratched the back of his neck, "Yeah?" he asked, bemused.

James laughed, "I could not imagine that."

Sirius nodded, "Good. Now destroy all of those thoughts completely - or you know what, imagine the complete opposite of that. When you do, if you do. Then you will have successfully understood our relationship." he said, leaning back into his chair.

Peter stared at us, wide eyed. "Wait, do that again - I didn't imagine anything."

Sirius sighed and before he could repeat himself I cut him off. "What he means is that we are not the conventional boyfriend-girlfriend, you will never see me writing a love poem about how dark his hair is." I said, with a roll of my eyes.

Sirius laughed, "Or how grey my eyes are," He said, nudging me with a smirk on his face making me laugh.

Peter bit his lip, "I thought all girls thought about marriage and stuff." he said, looking confused and shocked, it was like we had just revealed to him the inner workings of a girl's mind, apparently every girl was different. Who knew?

I inched towards Peter causing him to blush, "You might not be aware of this Wormtail but every girl is different. Isn't that surprising? Especially to me, I am very surprised." I said sarcastically.

"Of course you would be, since when have you classified yourself as a girl?" Sirius said, jokingly.

"Why don't you swallow your tongue, you arrogant prick." I said, laughing. "Besides, girls vary. My perception of what a girl is can be completely different than yours. Besides, I hate labels!" I said, crossing my arms.

Sirius chuckled, "Oh, I love you too, Winnie Powers." He said, pinching my cheek. "Isn't she the cutest?" He cooed.

I scrunched my nose at him, "Do that again and I'll slice off your arm and use your blood as ink." I said, with a sardonic smile.

Sirius laughed, "Cute, right?" he said sarcastically to everyone making them laugh, including me.

I laughed, "If I were to define myself in the simplest terms, it would be cute and murderous." I said, a small grin on my face. "Or adorable and terrifying."

Sirius laughed, "You pretty much summed yourself up."

Remus looked at us, a baffled expression on his face. "You'd think that now that you're together, you'd - I don't know, be nice to each other? I don't think I've ever seen a relationship quite like this." He said, laughing.

I laughed. The day after we kissed, we decided we would make it public and official. We first told the guys, who were not entirely surprised and then we walked hand in hand to the Great Hall. It was kind of weird, I felt like some sort of celebrity - admitting my relationship with Sirius to the whole school. I couldn't help but notice the disappointed looks, admiring gazes and the horrible glares from his myriad of admirers.

"Relax," Sirius said, whispering into my ear. "There's nothing to be nervous about." he said, an amused smile playing at his lips. Even though my face was stoic, he had somehow picked up how uneasy I was. I didn't know how.

I gulped, "Who said I was nervous?" I said, feigning confidence as we walked down to the Gryffindor table. It felt like I was walking slower than usual or maybe the table was farther away. Whichever it was, I wanted to sit down as soon as I could and forget all the eyes that were following me as I walked.

He laughed, "Your hand is sweaty," he said, clenching my hand. Oh that's how he knew.

My eyes widened and I felt embarrassment inflate inside of me like a giant balloon. I wanted to swipe my hand away as soon as he said that but he gripped my hand before I was able to do that.

"Calm down, if you move your hand away like that it'll look suspicious and fake." he said, laughing as we continued to make our way to the table.

"Sorry about that." I said sheepishly, finally reaching the table. The table seemed to be filled to the brim with a variety of foods but the shocked looks from my peers were enough to make me forget about food though.

Sirius immediately began to dig in, he didn't even notice the looks he was receiving from other people. Either that or he simply didn't care. I wasn't sure if it which one it was, perhaps it was a mixture of both. I admired that about him, I always had. He managed to always look confident and collected, even when things were going wrong.

"Everyone is staring at me," I muttered to him, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. "It's really uncomfortable." I said, honestly.

Sirius looked up and then finally noticed the people who were openly staring at me, Sirius narrowed his eyes at them and shot them an annoyed look.

"D'you need something?" He said, raising his brow at him. They all quickly turned away and focused on the food and their friends. I felt an immense weight off my shoulders and I felt like I could finally breathe.

Sirius eyes's seemed to gleam, the grey colour of his eyes seemed to be intensified by the subtle light of the candles floating in thin air. I had never gotten used to those candles. "Better?" He asked, an encouraging smile on his face.

I laughed for the very first time since I had walked in the great hall, "Very much. Thank you." I said, smiling and taking a sip of my pumpkin juice. I could still feel people's gazes on me, but for some reason - I didn't care anymore.

"Yeah, well - you thought wrong Remus Lupin!" I said, slamming my hand on the book in my lap. "Times have changed, this is the twenty-first century mate Keep up, won't you!"

"Yeah," Sirius said, agreeing with me. "What she said. I don't know what it was that she said, however I agree with Dot entirely." he said, with a nod. If he wasn't agreeing with me I would've scratched him for calling me Dot.

I leaned back into my chair, a satisfied grin on my face. "I feel kind of powerful," I said happily.

Peter scrunched up his eyebrows, "Okay so now that you're a couple -" Peter tried to say before I cut him off with a short sigh.

"You know what? I kind of hate that word. Couple. A couple of what? A couple of birds? A couple of chickens? A couple of trees? We are not a couple, there needs to be a better word!" I exclaimed, smiling.

Sirius lazily looked at me, "The Dream Team?" He suggested, nonchalantly.

I gaped at him, "Yes! yes! That's perfect. You're perfect - Wow, I'm so glad we're together." I said, grinning. "We're The Dream Team! I completely forgot about that." I said, happily.

Sirius smiled at me, but it was not his regular smile - the smile you would give to strangers you'd pass by in the street, or the smile you'd give when you meet your friend's parents for the first time. It was pure and raw adoration and happiness. It was smile you'd have on your face when you realise that you are so glad to be alive, it was the smile you give to a person you hope will stay with forever. If a smile could say, 'I love you' then it would be his smile right now.

Remus cleared his throat, "Like I was saying, wood nymphs are known as dyrads or buckletruckles. They exist all across the wizarding world." Remus's voice said, pulling me back into reality and into real life mode.

I laughed and started taking notes on what Remus was saying, they all did the same. Ever so often, I would glance up and see Sirius staring at me. Almost, studying me in a way. It was not a creepy gaze, but kind of like he was trying to capture me to keep in his memory. We didn't say anything for the entirety of our study session, but our gazes were interlocked nonetheless. He still had a hint of a fond smile on his face, to a stranger's eye you would think he had just remembered something funny.

Despite the fact we were sitting with our friends and almost all the whole student body in the library and even though we were supposed to be studying, my eyes could not break away from his. It was like I was in a trance. My body felt like it was buzzing, honestly and truly buzzing like a bee. Buzzing with positive energy. I felt good, better than I had felt in a long time.

I felt happy. I hoped Sirius did too.