Olivia and William sat in the waiting room quietly and stared at the ground. Cragen was on the phone answering phone calls that William or Olivia got because neither wanted to explain to anyone what was happening to their son.

Adam was in the corner with his acoustic guitar showing a little boy how to play. The boy quickly got attached to him and Adam couldn't refuse him because he had leukemia.

Casey already heard what was going on and was on her way to the hospital after work.

Cragen hung up the phone and sat down. "Aunt Cecile sends her best wishes."

William looked up. "Who?"

"Your mother's cousin. The big lady." Cragen tried to explain. William just stared at him. "Has that big mole on her face?"

"Oh. Yeah." William nodded. "Thanks."

The little boy took Adam by the hand and started to lead him across the waiting room. "C'mon Adam, you have to meet my friends."

"Ok, ok, let's go have a concert." Adam picked him up in one hand and carried his guitar in the other. "Lead the way Jerry." He teased.

"But you're carrying me, you're walking."

"Ok, you point, I'll walk there." Adam stated. He looked at Olivia and William. "Let me know when you hear something." Both nodded and smiled at his playfulness with Jerry.

A couple minutes later, Casey came in. "What happened? Is he ok?"

"He had a seizure, the doctor is still with him." Cragen answered.

"Is there anything I can do?" She offered. Both shook their heads. "Food? Coffee?"

"I'm not hungry." Olivia answered quietly.

"You have to eat something." William looked at her. "You hardly ate anything all day."

"I'm not hungry." She said more sternly.

"Olivia c'mon, eat something."

"Stop." Her voice instantly raised. She got off her chair and went down the hall.

William got up and was about to follow her. Casey quickly put her hand up. "I got it." She assured him and followed Olivia down the hall. "Liv." She ran a little to catch up to her.

Olivia stopped and wiped her eyes. "I was holding him when it happened" She whispered in tears. "It's my fault."

"It's no one's fault." Casey told her. "C'mon. It would have happened if no one was holding him."

"He is so small. I'm scared he won't make it." She cried even more.

Casey took her in a hug. "You can't think like that. He is strong, he will be fine."

"It's not fair."

"I know."

William slowly came down the hall seeing Olivia crying. He wasn't sure if he should have but he wanted to comfort his girlfriend. He said nothing and hugged Olivia from the back and Casey with her. Casey smiled at him and hugged him back.

"This is where the party is at." They heard Adam's voice and hugged all three of them from the side.

Olivia laughed a little and wiped her nose.

"Olivia these little guys wanted to give you a hug because Evan is sick." Adam spoke up and motioned to a bunch of kids standing behind him. "They wanted me to ask you if it was ok."

Olivia nodded. "Yeah, it's ok guys." The little kids quickly hugged Olivia around the legs. Olivia let go of her friends and bent down to hug all of the kids. "Thanks guys."

"Is Evan going to be ok?" Jerry asked.

"Yeah, he will be fine." Olivia answered with a nod.

"My mom cries all the time too, I always tell her not to cause tears don't solve anything. Laughter does, right Adam?" Jerry looked up at Adam.

"Yes." Adam nodded. "Now let's go practice our song for Evan so we can make him laugh." He picked up Jerry and put him on his shoulders. "Holding on?"

"Yeah dude."

"Awesome." Adam picked up two more small kids under his arms. "Let's go band." He started walking and all the kids followed him.

Casey smirked at him and quickly felt William and Olivia staring at her. "What?" She stopped smiling and walked back to the waiting room.

Olivia said nothing and hugged William. "I'm sorry for snapping."

"It's ok." He kissed her on the head. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah. Just felt overwhelmed." She tightened her hug and closed her eyes. "Tell me he will be alright."

He picked up her chin to look at her. "Hey, he will be just fine. Don't think negative. Please, I need you."

She nodded. "I know." She gave him a kiss. "I need you too."

"C'mon." He put his arm around her shoulders and led her back to the waiting room.

"So he plays the guitar?" Casey asked Cragen.

Cragen nodded. "And sings."

Casey nodded and then noticed Olivia and William coming back. "Not like I care." She shook her head at the older man. "I have a boyfriend."

Don simply smiled and nodded. "Ok."

Olivia sat down and rested her head on William's shoulder. "I'm hungry."

Casey quickly sat up. "What do you want? I'll go get it."

"I don't know." Olivia thought for a second. "Chinese?"

"I'm on it." William started pulling out his money. "Will don't make me smack you." William looked at her weirdly. Casey said nothing else and left the hospital but not before visiting the pediatric cancer section.

Elliot came in a couple minutes later with a bag of Chinese. "I think Casey is in love, she's spying on some guy playing a guitar for some kids."

William, Olivia and Cragen all exchanged looks and smiled.

"I got you guys Chinese, I know it's Olivia's comfort food." Elliot put the bag down. "Hope that's ok."

"Yeah, we sent Casey out for the same thing but that's ok." Olivia answered. "Thanks El."

"No problem. How's the little guy holding up?"

"We don't know yet." William answered. "We have to be patient."

"Hate it don't you?"

William and Olivia nodded. William opened the bag and looked through the bag, he gave Olivia her favorite food and he took the rest.

The doctor came out. "Hey guys." He looked at William and Olivia. Both instantly put their food down and got up. "Did you want to talk in private?"

"No, it's fine." Olivia answered.

"Ok, Evan is in a coma, his body basically shut down after the seizure to protect itself."

"How long will that last for?"

"A couple days, a week the most. If he is out of it for more than a week that's when it gets dangerous."

"But this coma isn't dangerous? He is a couple days old, he is small." William spoke up.

"This coma is the body self defense-"

"It's a fucking coma." William's voice raised. "You said the C-section was going to save him, what was the fucking point?"

"William." Olivia looked over at him and grabbed his arm. "Stop."

"Get off me." He pulled his arm out of her grasp and walked away.

"I'm sorry." Olivia quickly apologized to the doctor. "He is usually the calm one between us."

The doctor nodded understandingly. "It's fine, I understand. I'll keep you guys updated." He went back to the room.

Olivia took a deep breath and headed to find William.

Cragen quickly grabbed her arm. "Olivia don't, let him cool off, if you go talk to him now he will just pick a fight, just let him be."

Olivia nodded and sat down. "Now I know…when William curses he is really mad. That was the first time I heard him curse."

"Weird huh?" Cragen asked. Olivia nodded. "Are you ok?"

"I'll tell you in a couple days or a week. If I don't get back to you in a week, then I'm not ok."

Cragen nodded and got up. "I'm gonna go tell Adam what happened." He walked away.

Elliot watched Olivia for a second. "Want to finish your food?"

"I'm not hungry anymore." She whispered. "I wish all this would just go away."

"It will. Did you guys name him yet?"

"Evan Charles Grant."

"That's a good name."

"Thanks."

William came back with a small teddy bear in his hand. He sat down next to Olivia quietly and just rested his head on her shoulder. She said nothing and gently kissed his forehead and held his hand. He opened his mouth to apologize but she quickly cut him off. "I know." She whispered. "It's ok."

__-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Three weeks later…

Olivia walked into the apartment holding Evan in her arms. He was finally healthy enough to be out of the hospital. "Welcome home baby." She whispered.

William looked over at her and smiled. "Home sweet home."

"Without the sanitary smell."

"Or the funny clothes." He put the bags down.

"They are called scrubs." Olivia corrected him.

"They are called boring." He closed the door behind her. "I'm so excited for a shower without having to hurry up to get back to the hospital."

"You go first, I'll watch him then I'll go."

"Ok. Who's going to watch him after?"

Olivia looked over at him. "What?"

"I have to shower then leave."

"Where are you going?"

"I have to go to the base camp." He answered. "I thought I told you."

"No." Olivia raised an eyebrow. "I thought you were going to take a couple weeks off." She went to their bedroom to put Evan down.

"I did. Why do you think I was at the hospital every single day?" He pulled his shirt off.

"Oh so now I should be grateful that you were there for your son?" Olivia put Evan down in his crib as the little boy slept.

"What?" He asked. "Don't start with me Olivia."

"I'm not starting William, I just figured your son was more important than work." She went back to the living room.

He stared at her for a second and headed toward the bathroom. "I'm not giving you a reason to fight. Don't pick a fight with me today. Not today." He closed the door.

Olivia took a deep breath and sat down on the couch. She knew she was exhausted from staying awake almost every night. She was more terrified that she was going to raise this baby on her own. She saw it every day, what made her so different? She wasn't married to William and Evan wasn't planned. She didn't want her son being hurt if William left them. She stayed quiet and just stared at the ground

William came out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist. He said nothing and went to the bedroom. He came out a couple minutes later in jeans and a Marine shirt.

He went to the kitchen and started making food. "Are you hungry?"

"No." She answered quietly. "Is this an official business thing?"

"No. They are getting in new recruits so they just want me to be there to help out with stuff."

"What kind of stuff?"

"Paper work, speeches, placement. Just political stuff." He made himself a sandwich and also starting making her one knowing she would be hungry later.

"You keep saying stuff." She spoke up.

He looked up at her. "What?"

"Like you don't want to tell me where you're really going."

"What are you talking about? I just told you."

"Is Adam going to be there?"

"No."

"Why?"

"Because he is a lower ranking officer then me. What the hell is with all the questions?"

"I just want to know where you're going to be and with who. Nothing wrong with that."

"Yeah, nothing wrong with it if you're my mother and I'm seven." He rolled his eyes and brought her the sandwich over. "In case you're hungry." He put it on the coffee table.

"Thanks."

He nodded and went to get his shoes. "You going to be alright alone for a while?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"Why are you making this so hard on me?"

"Because."

"Because why? Let me in on it, please."

"I don't want to talk about it."

"You have to."

"I don't have to do anything. It's none of your business." She got off the couch and went to check on Evan. "Just leave."

He just stared at her and went to the doorway of their room. "What is that supposed to mean?" He asked quietly. "To this thing or forever?"

"Do what you want. I don't care." She laid down on the bed and turned her back toward him.

He said nothing and turned around slowly. He pulled on his shoes and left the apartment.