Chapter 5
Ivan Braginski sat down in the snow, eyes closed, and ignored the cold that seeped through his clothes. He imagined a vast field of sunflowers, the sunflowers going further than the eye could see on either side...from horizon to horizon, sunflowers spanned...
He heard a door open and shut behind him, and a worried female voice cooed, "Ivan! You will be catching death out here!"
Feet crunched through the snow, a young woman, older than Ivan, kneeling to his right. She wrapped her arms around him and said in her Ukrainian accent, "Morozko will be nipping your nose! Come, I will be warming up something to eat, yes? Will you like that?"
The Russian felt his sister gently pull him into a standing position. She lightly dusted off the snow clinging to his clothes, then preceded to play with his hair. She stared at him with her blue eyes, and she said playfully, "How is it that snow is caught in your hair, when sky is not crying snowflakes? Did you play in snow?"
With a smile, Ivan shook his head and said cheerily, "No, but I walked under tree that dropped snow on my head!"
His sister laughed, and he asked, "Yekaterina?"
"Yes?" the Ukrainian asked.
Thinking for a moment, Ivan finally decided to ask, "Do you think that I am good baby brother?"
Surprised, Yekaterina tilted her head to the side. She smiled at her innocent-looking brother and said, "Of course! Why are you acting like you used to, when we were young? I've always loved you, baby brother." She really did care for him, but she was unable to have a life of her own. She never wanted to hurt him, but she didn't want to always be in his shadow.
Ivan smiled at her. For some reason, he remembered when Chernobyl happened. He and Nataliya had helped evacuate Pripyet, but the scar over Europe-and Yekaterina herself-was horrifying. Ivan was insulted that Alfred's country had made a movie, Chernobyl Diaries, about that. The positive thing, though, was that all the stupid Americans died in the end.
Yekaterina enjoyed Ivan's childish smile, but was also glad that she didn't know what was causing that smile.
Hugh opened the door, and a Chinese woman stood there, holding a paper bag, and saying, "Aiyah, I got rost because you forgot to give me directions..."
"Sorry, chick," Hugh said, "but that wasn't me, that was-"
"I'M NOT CHICK!" The Chinese-person snapped, glaring up at Hugh. "I am mare, aiyah!"
The Texan stared at the Chinese guy for a moment, then reached into his back pocket for his wallet, moaning. He pulled out a brown leather wallet and opened it, handing twenty-five dollars to the dude, and said, "Okay, fine, bro. Here, tup included."
Still glaring at Hugh, the Chinese guy took the money and put it into his pocket. He glared at Hugh for a moment, then he realized, this guy was familiar...
"Texas?" the China-man asked? Hugh was surprised, and he asked, "Whoa, how you know that?"
Groaning, the Chinese guy said, "It's me, Yao. Aiyah, where's Arfred?"
To be honest, Yao didn't say "aiyah" a lot, but he purposely wanted to irritate the Texan, who thought that "aiyah" was the most annoying sound in any language.
Hugh gasped, too surprised to be annoyed, and he asked, "Dude, how you be?"
"You do not have to try speaking broken Engrish for me to understand you..."
"Huh?" Hugh asked, "Wah ya say? I be speakin' good English."
Yao hated to think that he spoke better English than most Americans, but it was a painful fact. He just ignored the Texan, saying, "Werr, where is Arfred? I thought he wourd be picking up food he ordered..."
Shrugging nonchalantly, Hugh said in a half-second-long-grumble, "Aihunwoh. Out fer business, I reck'n."
Aiyah, so stereotypical... thought Yao, but he just said, "Werr, if you or Arfred need anything, you both know how to get me. So rong."
The Chinese man turned and left, climbing into his car and driving away. Hugh went inside with the food, waiting thirty minutes before asking out loud, "WAY A MOM'NT! WHY HE HERE?!"
Alfred was sitting on the hood of his car, watching the sun set behind evergreen trees in the distance. He sighed, hugging his knees and burying his face in his arms. What had he done so wrong? Was this how Arthur had felt, all those years ago? Actually, it wasn't a long time ago, in historical time...no, Arthur couldn't have felt like that. This was entirely different.
Texas had been at 86 percent before Hugh was found...Arkansas had a high rating, surprisingly high for such a mild-mannered state...heck, Arkansas wasn't a very notable state. Alfred often forgot about it, himself.
What other states had the possibility with personification?
Alfred thought to himself, Okay, Arkansas had 76%...too high for comfort...Alaska had 86%, like Texas had...Florida had 63%...Nevada had 78%, right? New Mexico was 62%, Alabama having 63%...
What was he doing wrong? Alfred sighed, pulling out his phone and going to speed dial. He called his boss. A woman answered, "Yes, Alfred?"
Softly, Alfred asked, "Dude, what's the problem? Why can't you do things right?"
"What do you mean?"
"The money..." Alfred said. "Everything goes to China or Korea. Heck, I saw Taiwan on an ash tray the other day...sure, they're not bad guys, but I need some cash, too..."
"It's not like I can force Americans to start businesses to replace China."
That wasn't what Alfred had meant, and his female president knew it. Alfred continued, "Fine, then, what about healthcare? Medicade, Medicare, Veterans' Affairs...why do you write those dumb laws preventing most normal Americans from getting medicine they need?"
"I want to stop the wrong people from mooching off of our medical sys-"
"IDIOT!" Alfred snapped. "Fine, then, since you allow over half of my states to use marijuana as medication, I'll believe you! Tell me, then, about what you did to me guns?"
Angrily, the president said, "How many children have to be killed in schools for you to decide to ban guns?"
"EXPLAIN TO ME HOW MAKING STRICTER GUN LAWS WILL SAVE LIVES?!" Alfred snapped. "OVER HALF OF THE STATES THAT ARE GETTING CLOSER AND CLOSER TO SECEDING ARE ANGRY ABOUT THE 'USELESS GUNS'! HOW MANY MORE PEOPLE HAVE DIED DUE TO GUN VIOLENCE THAN BEFORE? YOU ROB THE CIVILIANS OF THEIR PROTECTION, AND EXPECT CRIMINALS TO SUDDENLY FOLLOW LAWS! IT SAYS IN THE CONSTITUTION, WE HAVE THE RIGHTS TO DEFEND OURSELVES! OKAY?! CAN YOU JUST DO SOMETHING RIGHT FOR ONCE, IDIOT?!"
Before she could respond, he hung up the phone. He then preceded to turn it off so she couldn't call him back. He slipped his phone back into his pocket and began to wonder how he should react. It might be safe to check out his states, to see if they have any personifications yet...yeah. He'd do that next.
After ordering a BigMac. He was hungry, and his Chinese food was about an hour away.
Lauren, Matt, and Gilbert were all together in a very large mall, taking Lauren to different places to find clothes. She found seven days' worth of pants, shirts, socks, underwear, and three different pairs of shoes-sneakers, boots, and dress shoes. She found three dresses she liked. They were all fairly identical-poofy shoulders, bows around the waists and necks, but one was black-purple, light purple, and fire-orange. Another was midnight blue, sky blue, ocean blue, and white. The third was black-purple, navy blue, sky blue, and gold.
"A-Are th-these good?" Matthew asked while Lauren held the clothes to her chest. She was barely visible under the mountain of clothes. Sounding muffled, the Canadian said, "Yes, thank you. But..."
Matthew tilted his head to the side, asking, "But, what?"
She crept over to him. She pressed her right shoulder to his, so she could see him, and she stood on her tip toes, whispering into his ear, "I need a bra..."
Her brother's face turned red. Gilbert didn't hear what was said, but he could tell by the red on the innocent Canadian's face that something was up. Crossing his arms over his chest, he asked, "Vhat? Bras?"
Now Lauren's face was red, and she curtly nodded around the pile of clothes. Gilbert laughed triumphantly, "Kesesesese~! I can take you eef Mattie isn't up to eet?"
Although he wasn't pleased that Gilbert would willingly take Lauren shopping for bras, Matthew knew that he would be no help in that area of expertise. He gulped, nodding, and said, "Y-Yes. Lauren, y-you go w-with Gilbert."
Trusting her brother's judgement, Lauren asked Matthew to hold her clothes while she went to the bra section with Gilbert. Matthew took her clothes and she cheerily said, "Bye-bye~ see ya later!" and followed Gilbert. Gilbert wasn't so very awkward in the women's underwear section of a store, but down a "girl's" section? Antonio might be used to that, but Gilbert certainly wasn't. He wouldn't tell Lauren or Matthew that, that was for sure! They would doubt his awesomeness.
They entered the section, and Gilbert re-crossed his arms again and told Lauren, "Vell, find somezing zat should fit."
Lauren was awkward-maybe moreso than Matt would have been. She looked around uncomfortably at all the bras. None of them actually looked like they would fit. How would she know if a bra fit, anyway? About a minute of uncomfortableness went by, when Gilbert finally asked, "Vhat? Do you not know vhat size you are?"
Sheepishly looking at him, Lauren nodded and murmured, "Yes, sir."
Groaning, Gilbert said, "Fine." He tried to sound un-excited by this as he said, "Take off your jacket so I might be able to see vhat size you are."
Feeling a little awkward, Lauren unzipped her jacket. The zipping sounded goofy, so she zipped it back up. Then down. Then up. She was zipping to a funny rhythm, imagining that the zipper must've been one of the best inventions ever. Not only did it help keep your clothes on, but it was also musical!
What is this? Gilbert thought in German. "Um...can you just unzeep your jacket already?"
Lauren jumped, surprised and embarassed, and took off her jacket. Her face was hot, from both being stupid and from being about to be inspected by a guy. Gilbert forced a completely serious face as he looked at Lauren. Her starry-night shirt was tight on her body, giving him a good idea of what she looked like. She definitely had the body of a Miss Yekaterina Braginskaya. Yekaterina had large breasts due to the fact of her agriculture in the Ukraine, so maybe Lauren's breasts meant something? Well, Gilbert didn't care. Over-analysing things in the presence of a hot chick was unawesome. He told her, "I zink you are a D."
"DEE?!" Lauren gasped, eyes wide. She didn't know much about bras, but D was definately large. How could she wear a large bra?
Gilbert nodded and said, "Ja, you are definitely a D. None of these little girl bras vill fit you. Kesesesesesese~, let's go find somezing zat vill fit."
He grabbed onto Lauren't wrist, jacket in other hand, and began to drag her away. Gilbert dragged her out of the store they were in, and they headed up some escalators. Lauren felt awkward among the crowd, and having Gilbert's hand so close to hers. The good thing was, though, as long as he was holding onto her, then she couldn't get lost among everybody.
They rushed into a place that Lauren hadn't time to read the name of. She noticed, though, that the pictures by the door were of attractive women in their underwear striking poses. Lauren felt awkward, and as they entered inside, Gilbert let go of her arm, saying, "You can stay here vhile I go find a couple bras for you."
The German then preceded to leave her standing between a wall of almost-naked women and a rack of skimpy underwear with a half-naked manikin. Lauren stared completely still for a moment, wishing to disappear. She pulled her jacket over her arms and zipped it up. Softly and slowly, as though playing a death march, she played with the zipper. What must've been only a few moments felt like hours. Suddenly, behind her, Lauren heard a French voice-the accent different than the other French voices she heard-saying, "Excuse me, but what is such a pretty young lady doing in here alone?"
Lauren jumped in fear and turned around to face the voice. A tall blonde man with hair like Matt's stood there. He had blue eyes, only slightly darker than Lauren's, and he had a bitof a beard. He was dressed elegantly, yet not something crazy, like something men wear to balls. Behind him, a dark-skinned man stood. He had dark hair and pretty green eyes, and he seemed friendly enough, although Lauren was wary.
"Well?" the blonde man asked, "Are you alone, little one?"
Gulping, Lauren said clearly in French, "No, I am not."
The darker man said in French with a Spanish accent, "Ah, you are not really a little one, are you?" He seemed cheery, yet concerned. "I know children, and you are not that little, are you?"
What did Lauren do in such a situation? Be wary of strangers, yes, but these were two, tall, obviously well-fit strange men, and there was a rack of underwear stopping her from going anywhere.
"Non," the French man said. "She isn't that young, but she isn't really eighteen yet, are you?"
A wonderously familiar laugh announced Gilbert's arrival, "Kesesesese, Lauren, I got some awesome bras for you~!"
Well, at least Gilbert was there. His announcement meant that even though he was embarassing, he was there all the same.
The pale, red-eyed German walked up, holding a plastic bag. He eyed the two men and gasped, "FRANCIS! ANTONIO!"
Lauren watched as the three guys hugged. The Spanish one, presumably Antonio, asked, "Gil, do you know this girl?"
Gilbert nodded, wrapping his right arm around Lauren's shoulders, "Of course I do! I'm awesome; I know everyone worth knowing! This is Lauren, who is Quebec!"
Francis's eyes widened, and he breathed, "Sacre bleu! Quebec! Wow, Mattie and I have a sister!"
The girl's eyes widened. This guy referred to her as his sister? "Are you...France?"
"Oui!" the man said, snatching up her hand and kissing it. "And since you are Quebec, you will be at the next World Meeting, non? If so, then you can sit by me~!"
Without realizing it, Lauren said, "And get herpies? Sorry."
Antonio and Gilbert laughed, smacking the denied Francis on the back repeatedly as he hung his head. Gulping, Lauren asked Gilbert softly, "M-Mister Gilbert, can we go back? M-Matt might be worried."
Gilbert laughed and said, "Why so un-awesome? These are my friends! Matthew will understand, right, Francis?"
Francis nodded and said, "Oui, Mathieu was such an understanding child, ohonhonhonhon~!"
The German stole a glance down at Lauren. He saw her blue eyes staring up at him, and he realized that he couldn't stand that un-awesome stare. She looked like a wounded puppy. He felt suddenly really awkward, sweat beading down his neck. Not awesome. He said, "Uh, okay. Let's go."
Lauren beamed up at him, and Gilbert said farewell to his friends. Lauren also politely said goodbye, although she wasn't pleased, and followed Gilbert closely. Once finding Matt in the exact same place as before, they headed back to the inn.