Hello everyone! I hope that I haven't made you wait too long (and if I did I'm terribly sorry). I've been really sick for three weeks, but my antibiotics seem to finally be working! So lets not make you wait any longer, okay?

Warning: -sneezes- mature content…not the happiest chapters I've ever written…you are warned…ACHOO! Tissues may be needed for tears…

Disclaimer: Nope. Not mine.

Chapter Fourteen: The Secret Book, the Hidden Message

Rain was never one of Gray's favorite weather conditions. Despite Natsu's constant teasing that "his name fit so well", Gray always got gloomy when the dark clouds came rolling by. Light mist or downpour, it didn't matter to him. So he was mildly surprised that despite the light sprinkle of rain, Gray's mood wasn't dampened. His hands rested comfortably in his jean pockets, the dark-haired man casually walking toward his favorite bar. There was no hurry to his walk, like the people surrounding him. His head tilted toward the sky, determining the weather was bound to get worse as the day went along.

"Maybe I should just ask her to stay in. She did offer to make me dinner last week." Except Gray was a little more interested in making out on the couch than testing her chef abilities. He smirked at the particular memory. The past few weeks with Juvia had been pleasant. They were spending time talking, from memories of their past together to their future plans. And to say Gray wasn't impressed with her goals would be a lie. Juvia was a very ambitious woman. The progress she had made in social work for the town was amazing. She was relentless, spending well over her required time in the office. And she planned to only make it better.

At the end of the day, Juvia wants to do her best to make every kid smile.

That one statement had really tugged at something deep inside Gray. Despite his best efforts, Gray was starting to really enjoy having her by his side. Hell, he had even asked her to spend the weekend at his apartment. Their physical relationship was slow, nothing moving past a few daring touches. But even that didn't bother Gray. Before Juvia, sex wasn't something Gray viewed as sacred. It wasn't that he was promiscuous; he had been picky with his sex partners. But really, that was all they were. Never had he really made an effort to fall for the woman before falling into bed with them. Juvia was the first woman to lay in his bed with all of her clothes (mostly) intact. Meaningless sex was replaced with pillow talk and play wrestling. And he was okay with that.

The rain had started to pick up as Gray jogged up the stairs to Fairy Tail. He sent a minor scowl to the sky before pushing into the bar, shaking his hair to disperse some of the moisture.

"If you're going to shake like a dog, why don't you stay outside!" Cana shouted, her cheeks rosy with a night buzz. Gray rolled his eyes at the drunk girl's statement, then arched an eyebrow at the man who grinned next to her.

"Aw, leave the love sick puppy alone and take another shot with me. Unless you're chicken?" Bacchus was quite aware of Cana's competitive streak, and chuckled when the brunette instantly brought her fierce brown gaze back to him.

"You're on. Mira, we need some more shots over here!"

"For the last time, it's Lisanna." Well that was a new development. Any Monday night was Mira's shift. Everyone knew, because she would change the drink specials and post any new Fairy Tail events on the board. Not to mention Gray and Juvia had unofficially made Mondays one of their date nights. Instead, Gray watched the youngest Strauss sibling bring over a group of shots to the rowdy table, her smile brightening when seeing Gray. "Hey, Gray! How was work? I hope the weather hasn't put too much of a damper on your Monday."

"Surprisingly, no. Not that I'm not happy to see you, Lisanna, but I thought Mondays were your sister's shift?"

"Well they are, normally. Laxus is turning 29 on Friday, so he's demanding Mira take the whole week to celebrate with him. They settled for every other day, so I'm helping Lucy out for the night!" Ah, he had almost forgotten about Lucy's latest conquest. Since the show Laxus had put on a few weeks ago, the two seemed quite smitten with their newly developing relationship. It was rare to see the two apart for more than a few days.

"Well I can see why Lucy needs reinforcements. The bar's pretty busy. Nobody's given you or Lucy a problem, right?" She giggled at his concern, sending him a dismissing wave.

"Even if they wanted to, big brother Elfman is keeping them in line. He never leaves the bar when I'm behind it." Now that wasn't surprising to Gray. Elfman had been more than protective of his little sister ever since she came back from her operations. The guilt that he had allowed himself to carry for so long was hard to get rid of for the big man. Lisanna had told him several times that it was nobody's fault she had gotten sick, yet Elfman couldn't shake the feeling that he should have protected her. Since then, he was overly protective. Sometimes, Gray thought it was better to be an only child.

"A man never lets his baby sister get pushed around by other men!" Gray could hear Elfman's proud ranting from across the room. He also could see the roll of the eyes from the brunette next to him.

"Oh please, you big oaf. Your sister is a kitten who can pull out the claws when she needs to. Isn't that right, Lisanna?" Evergreen ignored the downcast look Elfman gave her while Lisanna giggled and nodded.

"You know it!"

"Ever, don't diminish my role in front of my little sister! That's not very manly at all."

"Well if you haven't noticed, I'm a woman! And if you can't figure that out for yourself, maybe I'll find a real man that can." The raise in Evergreen's voice was followed by her pushing off her barstool. She turned on her heel before he could respond, stomping into one of the back rooms. Yup, Elfman had insulted the sensitive Scorpio. The man in the hot seat let out an annoyed groan, but didn't hesitate to follow the pissed woman.

"You know, I still don't get how Lucy figured those two would ever be a good couple," Gray mumbled, running his hand through his hair while Lisanna smiled. She yanked on Gray's shirt, making him lean down so she could whisper.

"This is just their version of foreplay. They fight, they storm off, and then they have sex. You should hear them when they're at home; louder than anyone I've ever heard!" Blushing while he cleared his throat, Gray quickly straightened and massaged the bridge of his nose.

"Well, now I need a shot to get that unwanted picture from my head."

"Oh stop being such a prude! What's better than realizing that there's someone out there that drives you crazy and makes you smile at the same time?" Lisanna's attention was drawn to a table of Fairy Tail members, missing the edge of Gray's mouth tilting into a smile.

"Nothing, actually." His words fell on deaf ears, Gray shaking his head before glancing around the bar. Looking for the woman who caused such an uncharacteristic smile, Gray was surprised to see Juvia nowhere to be found. Normally Juvia was here earlier than him, waiting patiently at a table or chatting it up with Lucy at the bar. Instead, the tables were filled with unfamiliar faces and Lucy was alone. Hoping that his blonde friend would know the whereabouts of his missing Pisces, Gray made his way to an empty barstool.

"Gray! You know, I was just thinking about you and Juvia. I haven't really had any time to catch up with either of you in the past couple days; how have you been?" Lucy had become a very proficient bartender since she started. Part of it was having Mira as her mentor, but Gray knew that Lucy was one of the more intelligent members of their bar. Her best friend was Levy, after all. He had watched Lucy memorize several drink orders at once, as well as sweet talk her way into many positive outcomes. He was impressed with how easily she switched bottles to make the fruity drink. She even rolled the vodka bottle around her arm, a trick that he knew took some practice. He waited until she was done with her customer before he responded.

"We're fine. Nothing to report, I guess." He went to lean on his hand, but jumped back when Lucy entered his personal space to stare him down.

"You better not be lying to me, Gray. I've heard that she's been sleeping at your house, and that's a very serious step for both of your signs. You need to remember that this isn't a game to her. She's put a lot of her heart out there for you." He almost pouted, but refrained when realizing how childish that would be. What was he, Natsu? Instead he settled for looking away from her and scowling.

"I get that. I'm not intending to hurt anyone, you know." At his grumpy tone, Lucy softened her gaze and leaned back.

"Of course I know that, Gray. Sorry, I just worry about her." The earlier irritation at her interrogation went away, knowing that Lucy wasn't trying to accuse him. She had taken a personal responsibility not only to Fairy Tail, but to her friends, to make their relationships function to the best of her abilities. With clients like Evergreen and Laxus, Lucy was carrying a lot on her plate.

"Well, I was actually hoping that you knew where she was. We meet here on Mondays normally, but I haven't seen her today." Lucy placed her hand on her chin, taking a few moments to think before she nodded.

"Well yes, I've seen her. But it wasn't here. When Natsu was walking me to work, I saw her walking the opposite way of the bar. I assumed that she was just going home for the night. That was only a half hour ago. Have you tried calling her?"

"Yeah, but it goes right to voicemail. Sometimes Juvia forgets to charge her phone at night, so I didn't think anything of it." He glanced at his phone, confirming that he had no missed calls or messages. Nothing from the missing woman. As if knowing they were watching, the phone suddenly rang. It made Lucy jump and Gray scowl. The number wasn't one that he recognized. Worried about Juvia, Gray didn't hesitate to answer the phone. "Hello?"

"125 Pleasant Road." Gray blinked at the gruff voice on the phone, then frowned.

"Gajeel?"

"No, the Easter Bunny calling to check in." Gray growled and clenched his fist, trying not to raise his voice in front of Lucy.

"So funny, I'm hanging up now." A pause from the other line was filled with the sound of rain, Gray realizing that Gajeel was outside. What the heck was he doing outside in weather like this?

"Jesus, wait." Gray hesitated when he heard a strange tone to Gajeel's voice.

"Why should I?"

"She needs you, Gray. Juvia, I mean. So, just…get over here, Prince Charming. 125 Pleasant Road."

"What the hell do—" Gray stopped when Gajeel hung up. He put the phone back on the bar, glancing up to his confused friend. "Gajeel just called me with a random address and told me to go there."

"What do you think happened?" Lucy's concerned tone made Gray shake his head while hoping off his stool.

"I'm not sure. Actually, he kind of sounded concerned. You know, underneath his dick tone."

"Whatever it is, it must be serious. Gajeel doesn't call for help, especially when it comes to Juvia. And if he called you, instead of one of us girls, it's something bad," Lucy said, Gray shoving his phone in his pocket before he glanced to the window being pelted with rain.

"Only one way to find out. I'll let you know as soon as I get everything figured out." He exchanged a quick goodbye before leaving the bar, covering his head with one arm while trying to find the street in question on his phone. The rain and darkening skies of night made it hard to see the directions, but Gray refused to slow his pace. Though he wasn't one to worry, hearing Juvia needed him changed him. He could feel the rain drenching his clothes, yet it didn't bother him as much as not knowing what was causing Juvia distress. Since when did the blue-haired woman get so deep under his skin?

Gray didn't want to admit that Juvia was becoming more than just a friend. Even after their dates, their long night conversations, and the intimacy they had started to explore, Gray had yet to sit and evaluate his true feelings for Juvia. He couldn't count the amount of times she had admitted her love for him. She wasn't ashamed or shy when it came to their relationship. But to Gray, the idea of love…

He stopped at an intersection, his heavy breathing showing just how fast he had been running. Rain splashed across his face, but Gray remained still as he stared ahead of him. Why was he in such a rush to be by her side? Gajeel was there; she wasn't in danger. For all he knew, Juvia just needed him to help move something or do an errand. There were hundreds of reason that were logical and no reason to fret. And yet here he was, running through a storm in order to calm his racing heart. When did he become so concerned about Juvia?

His destination, upon arrival, wasn't what he expected. The road was mainly deserted, except for the single building at the end. As he pushed through the rusted iron gate, Gray stared at the remains of a building. The windows were all broken, red signs signaling that its demolition date was the next day. Grass that needed to be mowed covered the yard as if it hadn't been walked across for years. Graffiti riddled the sides of the paneling. The property screamed desertion. Gray silently walked along the only path left, hesitating to step on the cracked wooden steps of the porch. There was no door in the entrance, Gray double checking the directions he had put into his phone. Why did Gajeel tell him to come here?

"So you actually showed up." Gray jumped before he looked to his right, scowling at the man who leaned against one of the porch's pillars. Gray glanced around Gajeel, then focused his irritated stare back on the giant.

"Where's Juvia?"

"She's out back, but I'm warning you she's not in good shape." Gajeel glanced out to the front yard, an unreadable look in his eyes.

"What do you mean? She's not hurt, right?"

"Physically? Like I'd ever let that happen. But mentally…" Though Gray didn't get all the information he wanted, he felt his anger slipping away from the somber tone in the mechanic's voice.

"Then what's the problem?"

"This dump we're standing in? This is Juvia's childhood."

"Wait…you mean this is her old house?" Gajeel scoffed at Gray's question, hand tightening on the railing next to him.

"Orphanages aren't houses. They're hellholes that the state puts kids in when they ain't got no place else to put them. Families come, and like puppies at a pound you get lined up to see if you're the type of kid they wanna take home with them. Sometimes they keep you, sometimes you're 'not what they expected' and you get sent back like a bad Christmas present. Then there are ones like Juvia, who never get picked. Because she wasn't a blond hair, blue eyed, perfect little girl. Because she wasn't 'normal'. From the moment she was born, until she was eighteen years old, Juvia lived here.

"And this orphanage wasn't kind to her. Juvia came to the orphanage back when a lot of the social work was just starting to form. There were no monthly check ins, or shut downs on shady orphanages. Their rations were slim, their housing was disgusting, and they had no problem beating children with belts when they deemed it necessary. Kids didn't always get to shower; their clothes were all hand me downs from kids who aged out or were adopted and no longer needed rags. Juvia pushed herself through school, taught herself from whatever she could get her hands on. She was picked on at school for smelling like moth balls and being an orphan. She got no sympathy from the owners of the orphanage. For eighteen years, Juvia didn't know what it felt like to belong to a family, a home, or even a community. And I'm sure if she hadn't stumbled upon Fairy Tail when she did, Juvia wouldn't still be here."

"I-I didn't know—"

"Of course you didn't," Gajeel snapped, Gray tensing when Gajeel took a step toward him. The mechanic slammed his hand against the railing, the old wood splintering under his anger. "Juvia doesn't tell you any of this crap. She doesn't burden you with anything that pains her, she never shows you the ugly sides of her past. She leaves all the damage control to me!"

"She called you here?" Why that stung Gray, he wasn't sure. Despite every demon Gray had thrown at Juvia, she welcomed it. Embraced him. But now, thinking of their conversations, Gray realized they had only talked about the monsters that had shaped him. Never her. And yet here stood Gajeel, who knew more about Juvia's pain than Gray could even imagine. Was it because, deep down, Juvia didn't trust Gray like Gajeel?

"She's scared to tell you," Gajeel mumbled, bringing Gray back to the conversation.

"What?" Gajeel scoffed, the anger boiling in his voice.

"Yeah, that's right. Me? I'm a screw up; I did tons of things I ain't proud of. My parents weren't ever winning an award for best in show. Actually, both are probably dead by now. And her parents were a real piece of work. Dumped her in a trash can the second she was born. We were rejected. Every guy she's ever tried with has left the second they realized what kind of past she came from. Juvia is sure that her fairy tale will end the second you realize what keeps her up at night. She's so scared that prince charming will high tail it out of here as soon as he realizes she's not full of happiness and sunshine. That she too, has demons she struggles with."

"They just left her?" Gray asked, his hands balling into fists when Gajeel nodded.

"Who wants to be with a broken person like us?"

"Then why did she come back to this place?"

"Juvia has only three consistent things in her life. One is Fairy Tail. Two was that everyone, without fail, would leave her. The last thing was this place. And as you can see from these pretty red notices, they're destroying it." Gray watched Gajeel rip one of the signs down, crumbling and tossing it at Gray's feet. "She just found out today."

"This is just another thing that's leaving her," Gray mumbled, kicking the paper off the porch.

"Yeah, basically." Gajeel narrowed his eyes on Gray, letting silence linger between then. Rain poured down even harder than before, soaking the deserted toys left in the overgrown yard. Finally, after what seemed like hours, Gajeel crossed his arms and sighed. "A few months ago, I told you that if you intended to get serious with Juvia, that you better be ready to take on the role. That she had been abandoned enough, and you needed to either stay the fuck away or be committed. This is it, Mr. Perfect. You decided you could handle it. So here's your chance to confirm it. Step up and prove to her she's worth something even if she's mangled."

Despite his best efforts to keep his emotions in check, Gray knew he was mad. Mad at every guy who had made Juvia think her story was too depressing to be told. Mad at Gajeel for speaking to him like he was one of the sleaze balls that walked away. Mad at himself for never asking Juvia about her past. Maybe Gray was mad at the parents who deserted her in such a desolate place. The foster parents who skipped past her because she was different. No matter what reason he went with, he could feel his body trembling in anger. And he only knew one way to handle it.

He needed to see her.

"She's out back?"

"Yeah, you'll find her on the swings I'm sure." Gray nodded and walked past Gajeel, but stopped just before leaving the porch.

"Just one thing," Gray said, catching the attention of the larger man. "Juvia's not mangled. She's a survivor."

Gajeel didn't answer, waiting until Gray was off the porch to grin. He leaned on the railing of the porch, looking up at the storm clouds with pride.

"Damn straight she is."

The creaking of the swing underneath Juvia echoed in the quiet night, the silent woman staring into the darkness. Her hair was plastered against her cheeks and neck, Juvia now losing track of how long she had been out there. Her clothes were beyond soaked, yet the rain didn't seem to bother her as much as the hole that was expanding in her chest. Her skin was chilled to the point that she couldn't feel her fingertips. Goosebumps covered her flesh like a second skin, leaving her body shivering for warmth. None of that mattered to her as she felt her world breaking down.

How many times had she sat on this swing? She couldn't guess if her life depended on it. Years of her life were playing out in her head as she looked at the desolate ground in front of her. Each section of this yard held memories of her growing up. The basketball court was the first place she was called a 'trash baby'. She fell off the slide and sprained her ankle when she was eight. It didn't stop the owners from making her do chores. The back stairs were the place she sat and ate her lunch if she was lucky enough to get one. And this swing was where she got her first kiss from a boy who she could barely remember. He had been adopted the week after, and she had never seen him again. She placed her fingers to her lower lip, as if to remember the feeling of innocence slipping from her.

By tomorrow, all of her memories would be gone. Tears dripped from her face, though her cheeks were too numb to feel them. She didn't brush them away, her hands now laying limp in her lap. She had known it would only be a matter of time until this building was condemned and torn down. Her childhood orphanage had been closed three years ago due to neglect and countless charges of child abuse. She remembered crying in guilt-ridden joy when hearing about it. She knew that the claims were true; Juvia had gotten her fair share of beatings when the orphanage owners were mad. It was why she barely spoke as a child. The less you talked, the more invisible you became. When Juvia turned 18, she signed herself out of foster care and never looked back. Not once did she return to her own orphanage, but dedicated her life to making sure other organizations weren't mistreating their children. So many times she wanted to go after her own orphanage, but she couldn't get herself to do it. It was a weight off her shoulders when she finally got news that it had been closed down. She thought she would feel the same joy when the building was taken down.

And she did. She just didn't expect this much pain to come with it.

"Juvia is broken," she whispered, believing it was the only logical answer for her hypocritical feelings for the place. She lowered her head, unable to face herself.

"Juvia is not broken." Juvia's head snapped back at the familiar voice, gasping when she felt her swing being pushed from behind. Gray's face held an unreadable emotion as he looked at Juvia's old stomping ground, his hands pressing on her back to push her again. Her whole body had gone rigid at seeing him, anxiety welling in her stomach. How did Gray discover this place? And more importantly, how much did he know about it? Her lips trembled as she tried to put a phrase together, but Gray beat her to it. "Gajeel told me you spent your whole childhood here. That this was an orphanage."

"Gajeel," Juvia mumbled, dropping her head down again. She wanted to be angry at her friend, but she knew this payback was justified. She did thwart his plan of leaving by bringing Levy to his job. But in her heart, she knew it was best for him. Why would he get payback like this? No good could come from Gray being here.

"He also told me about all the pain that this place has caused you. About the beatings and unfair treatment you endured here. That nobody adopted you."

"Please stop, Gray-sama."

"He told me about your parents." Her back went rigid against the hands on it. Closing his eyes, Gray sighed and pushed her again. "Your past isn't a pretty one, I'll give you that."

"Juvia is sorry," she mumbled, staring at her feet dragging along the muddy ground.

"You're sorry that people treated you so cruelly?" She felt the swing finally stop, the chains twining over her head as Gray turned her to face him. Nervous to meet his gaze, Juvia clutched tightly to the swing while shaking her head.

"Juvia is sorry that Gajeel told you all of this. Juvia was happy with Gray-sama, she just didn't want it all to go away yet. She wasn't lying; Juvia never lied to Gray-sama."

"You've told others before me, right?" When Juvia nodded quietly, Gray placed his hand on the top of her head in comfort. "And they left you."

"Understandably. If Juvia's parents couldn't love her, how could someone else? Juvia holds no ill feeling for those men." She closed her eyes tightly, praying the rain masked the tears slipping down her cheeks. "She'll hold none for Gray-sama either. She will still love him unconditionally."

"I know you would." His hand left her head, Juvia flinching at the loss. She heard movement in the mud under them, but was too scared to open her eyes. What if he had left? Could she stand to watch Gray walk out of her life like so many others? "But give me some credit, woman."

"Huh?" Her eyes open to the touch of hands cupping her cheeks, widening when seeing Gray kneeling in front of her. Mud seeped into his pants, but Gray's serious gaze showed no discomfort from it. "G-Gray-sama!"

"When my parents left, I told you that Ur had offered to take me in. If she hadn't, I'm sure I would have eventually ended up in the same position as you. I was lucky. You weren't. You had to deal with pain I couldn't imagine. Most people in your position would have dealt with their pain with drugs or alcohol. They turn to dirty jobs because they can't break past their horrible childhoods. They would have never become a successful social worker, who puts themselves back into the environment that scarred them so deeply. And yet here you are, a beautiful woman who makes sure any child left alone never feels that way. The selflessness you hold knows no bounds.

"Those men who left you were idiots, every one of them. But I guess my luck continued to grow. If they had taken the time to realize how much beauty can come from strife, they would have never let you out of their lives. You are not, nor will you ever be, trash. Your past has made you who you are. Every day of pain you went through left room for a future with joy. There's nothing about you that I see as broken. I mean, at least you don't have a stripping habit, right?" He let a smile break through as he pulled her down to him, placing a soft kiss to her lips. They trembled under his touch, Juvia's heartbeat pounding in her ears. This had to be a dream. Juvia knew that she was undeserving of such a fantasy, but she refused to pinch herself and ruin it. She felt Gray pull back from the kiss, eyes filled with a cocktail of emotion. His hands warmed her cheeks, despite their slight tremble. "The first night I took you to my apartment, do you remember that?"

"When Natsu made a football out of Juvia's cake?" She whispered, Gray's eye twitching at the comment.

"Is that really what you think of first?"

"Well, Juvia put a lot of time into her cake…" She trailed off while he smacked his head. Leave it to Natsu to steal his spotlight.

"Okay, well do you remember the conversation after the cake?" She hesitated to nod.

"When Gray-sama tried to leave," She whispered, her heart clenching at the thought. It had been a scary night for her, one that only reminded her of her turbulent past. He swallowed, and Juvia blinked as the atmosphere changed around him. Gray's composure went from steady to nervous, and she could see it in the way his knees continued to shift on the slippery ground.

"Juvia, I tried to pull away because I didn't know how to love you. All I could think was how my past would make me mess up. That the love Ur had for me ended up killing her. I felt broken. Nobody else tried to change my thought process; nobody could take a chance on such an iced heart. Even women I had spent nights with accepted my cold demeanor and left quickly. Yet you had such faith in me from day one. You knew that I would heal. Not by smothering my feelings and hiding from real human connection, but by taking chances. You promised to stay by my side during them. And you did, no matter how many times I ignored you or denied your feelings. You stuck by my side like a best friend, like a partner. So, with the tables turned, why would I run?"

"Gray-sama…" She whispered, choking on the tears she could no longer control. He braced himself, then spoke.

"I…I'm not perfectly healed yet. I've got my scars still, but…but I still can say this, now. I won't leave you, no matter your demons. No matter what nightmare wakes you up at night. Because you've…captured me completely and….and I l-love you." Even with his preparation, Gray's back quickly slammed into the mud when Juvia tackled him to the ground. Thunder boomed over their heads, wet strands of blue hanging around Gray's face like a curtain. "Juvia!"

"Say it again, Gray-sama!" He wanted to yell at her for the mud caking his back, but his scolding faltered when seeing the pure joy filling her features. Her body seemed to hum with excitement, the smile on her face brightening up the darkest of clouds. Gray let out a sigh, rubbing the back of his neck and grimacing when feeling the slickness of muck. Neither of these tactics made Juvia miss the red hue on Gray's face.

"Jeeze Juvia, way to overreact…I love you, okay?" Even with the tone of annoyance, Juvia's pure elation filled the kiss she gave him, grasping his face with muddy hands. He yanked her closer to him, ignoring the storm around them to enjoy the feeling of her pressed against him. She grasped at any part of him she could get to, her kiss only stopping when either needed to breath. The lackluster weather couldn't change the steady warmth filling his heart with every kiss they shared. Gray continued to run his fingers along her body, knowing that the two of them would need a shower when they went to his house. Juvia might need someone to wash her back. And maybe a little more. The admission of love between the two could be a step in the sexual department as well. After all, nothing, and he meant nothing, would ruin—

"Way to go, Prince of Mud." Gray's whole body tensed at the gruff voice, Gray groaning when Juvia immediately jumped off of him. Gray leaned his head back to stare at the biggest cock-block he had ever seen. Gajeel's giant grin proved he knew exactly what he was doing, sending a thumbs up to the fuming guy in the mud. "Though you two getting arrested for fucking in an abandoned orphanage would be a hilarious story to tell, I'm gonna have to veto that."

"G-Gajeel! Gray-sama would never do that!" Juvia was quick to her feet, leaving Gray contemplating the benefits of murdering a certain long-hair man. Sighing loudly, Gray managed to follow the muddy path Juvia left behind back to the porch. He grunted when a heavy arm landed on his shoulders, Gray glancing up at the man who ruined his shower fantasy.

"You did good, kid," Gajeel said, the three leaving the abandoned orphanage. Gray's irritation from before slowly deflated when he received a genuine smirk from Gajeel.

"Yeah?" Gray asked, smirking back. He knew Gajeel wasn't biologically related to Juvia, but it sort of felt good to get his praise. Though neither said it out loud, Gray knew Gajeel was the closest thing to family Juvia had. A big brother of sorts. So feeling slight acceptance from Gajeel made his relationship with Juvia feel more concrete. The two looked at the girl walking in front of them, seeming to enjoy the shower that soaked her.

"Way better that her last boyfriend. Had to kick that guy's ass to China and back after he broke her heart." Boyfriend? Is that what he was now? Gray tossed the idea around in his head, then nodded to himself. Juvia as his girlfriend was a very pleasant thought. It seemed logical after his previous confession. He'd have to ask her properly later, which would cause another onslaught of kisses. Maybe more. He could live with that. Gajeel glanced to the shorter guy next to him, grinning mischievously when seeing the serene face he held. Feeling the need to poke the bear, Gajeel spoke. "Keep it up, and I may even let you marry her."

Juvia wasn't sure why Gray had passed out, but Gajeel only chuckled while carrying the lifeless body back to Fairy Tail.

"I can't believe it's already August 20th! The summer is coming to an end." Lucy looked up at her pink-haired companion, giggling at his position. Natsu was splayed out on the bar top, hands laying limp off the edges. She placed a soft kiss to his forehead, then turned to finish washing the beer mugs.

"Well summer can't last forever."

"But summer's so much easier for work!"

"For you, maybe. The bar is packed in the summer. And wouldn't the summer make it even harder for you? Tons of people do stupid things in the summer; I feel a lawyer would get more cases." Natsu, despite his lackadaisical nature and rule-breaking habits, had found a wonderful job working for Gildarts Clives, the best lawyer in Fairy Tail. While Gildarts took on the massive cases that brought fame and fortune to his doorstep, Natsu was more into defending the people who couldn't stand up for themselves. His track record was more impressive than he let on, his passion and conviction normally overpowering those who opposed him.

"No way. Winter means snow, and snow means so many more accidents. And the cold bring out the worst in people who sue each other. Plus we've got custody battles for the holidays and it's just way too much!"

"I'm sure you'll live," Lucy said, giggling when he pouted up at her.

"Well what about you? How do you think the weather will affect Operation Layla?" Lucy stopped laughing, thinking over the question. Did she really know? She had done a lot of work during the summer, but many of her pairs were moving into steady relationships without her help. What would happen when those pairs were official? Would…Fairy Tail even need her anymore?

"I'm not sure," she mumbled quietly, Natsu lifting his head when hearing the insecurity in her voice. He scowled, but remained quiet. Lucy shook her head and tried to smile through her uncertainty, shrugging her shoulders. "I'm sure I'll figure it out eventually."

"What a way of thinking." Both tensed at the new comer's voice, Lucy glancing over Natsu's shoulder to see a familiar face. Though Natsu seemed confused at the stranger, Lucy was quick to drop her smile.

"Zoldeo." The man bowed in her presence, his smile seeming stitched into his skin. Lucy tightened her hold on the mug she was holding, showing no kindness to the eccentric man. "What are you doing here? Did my father send you?"

"Of course, my lady. I still worked at the castle, despite Layla's untimely death." Lucy unwillingly winced at his mention of her mother, but ignored the stab of pain.

"What does he want? Lucy won't be going anywhere with you, if that's his game plan." Natsu was quick to his feet, standing between the man and Lucy. She placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, but he refused to move from his spot.

"She may want to reconsider that." Lucy blinked when Zoldeo pulled an envelope from his pocket, handing it over to Natsu. Narrowing his eyes on the piece of paper, Natsu slowly brought the envelope to his nose to sniff it. "What are you doing?!"

"Making sure there's nothing funky on it," Natsu replied, as if smelling mail was a common occurrence. Lucy laughed nervously before smacking Natsu's head, snatching the envelope from him.

"My dad wants me to come see him, not dead!"

"Well you can never be sure. I mean, look at the weird guy he sent to give you the mail." Natsu jerked his finger at Zoldeo, who gawked.

"Excuse me?"

"You've got a huge afro and what's up with the sides of your mouth? You look like a stitched up freak."

"Y-You have pink hair! And a scarf in the middle of summer!"

"What's your point?" Natsu asked, staring at him in confusion. Lucy sighed as she rubbed her temple, listening to the two go back and forth with appearance insults. Leave it to Natsu to turn a simple exchange into some sort of screaming match.

"Can you two shut up so I can read this?!" She shouted, instantly quieting the two. Natsu huffed while wrapping his scarf closer to him, glaring at Zoldeo. Lucy turned her attention back to the envelope, opening it slowly. She was surprised the letter was written, not typed.

My Dearest Lucy,

I know that we've had our differences these past few years. I'm also aware that most of that was my own fault. Until now, I could never deal with the pain that came with your mother's death. Every time I looked at your beautiful face, I could see my Layla. It was why I kept so much distance between the two of us. I did only want what was best for you, which was why I continued to pair you with men I felt could measure up to my expectations. I wanted nothing but the best for my darling daughter. But I can see now, despite my good intentions, my ways only hurt you.

About a month ago, I tried to buy Fairy Tail from Marakov, not that it matters now. I offered his grandson double the amount of money the bar was worth, in my desperate attempt to get you back. If I owned the bar, I could force you out and back to the house your mother and I had raised you in. I was shocked to discover that Laxus refused my offer, knowing exactly who I was. His reasoning for turning down the offer will forever live in my heart. "Lucy will be hurt if I take your offer, and the happiness of my family is worth more than any money you could ever possess." How a bond that strong could be made without blood was something I never could understand.

This letter is to atone for the pain that I've given you. As a father, I'm ashamed of what I've done. I wish I could rectify the situation; I know I don't have the time needed to do so. But know that despite the bonds I've destroyed between us, I am proud of the woman that you've become. I know your mother would be, as well. We both loved you, and I hope this letter will help ease some of the pain that I've made for my precious Lucy.

I have one final request for you, as your father. Please, return to the Mansion. Look inside of the left drawer of my office desk. There's a book that I couldn't bear to part with. I hope that, in time, you'll understand why I did what I did.

I'm sorry, Lucy

Your Loving Father

"What is this?" Lucy asked, looking up at Zoldeo's somber face. Lucy's hand shook as she glanced between the letter and the servant, unwilling to accept the feeling of dread filling her stomach. "Where is my father?! I want to see him right now!"

"Miss Lucy…your father passed away last night." Lucy's heart stopped as her eyes widened, unable to force breath in her lungs while Zoldeo continued. "He was on a business trip when he passed out. A few x-rays discovered pancreatic cancer. It had been developing very rapidly; he was hospitalized for the last week. Knowing he was going to pass, we were ordered not to contact you in any way. Instead, he gave me this letter and told me to deliver it upon his death."

"No…no, tha-that's not possible! My father…he was just here! He was fine and breathing and…and…"

"Lucy," Natsu whispered, Lucy backing into the bar. She covered her ears, continuing to shake her head. The glasses previously cleaned were knocked down by her movement, smashing into the floor. The crash caused attention to be brought to the bar, though Lucy didn't seem to care. She gasped for air, her lungs seeming to fail her.

"Lucy!" Mira's concerned voice triggered Natsu, who quickly jumped over the bar and wrapped his arms around Lucy. She shouted as she tried to break away from him, Natsu ignoring the pain of her slamming her hands into his chest.

"Let me go! He's not dead, Natsu!" Lucy's words rang through the suddenly silent air, Natsu following her lead as she slowly sunk to the floor behind the bar. He brought her head to his chest, feeling the dampness of tears filling his shirt. He buried his nose in her hair, gently rubbing her back while her sobs wracked her body. Time seemed to slow for the both of them, the world around them disappearing.

Lucy couldn't remember moving from the back of the bar. She had a faint memory of Natsu carrying her, but she didn't know where to or when. Through blurry eyes, she noticed that nightfall had seeped through her bedroom window. It had been hours since she had received the news of her father's death. She curled up tighter on the bed she was laying in, staring at the note she had memorized. Was this really happening? Her lip trembled as she brushed her fingers over the writing, knowing her father's penmanship. Her mind whirled, unable to grasp onto one single thought.

Why hadn't he told her about his cancer? When had he decided to write her this note? How far apart from his death did he write it? Was there any way that this nightmare would go away if she went to sleep? Lucy knew the stages of grief; she had been through them before with her mother. Yet this time, it just felt different. Everything felt rushed. Years of anger and pain was intertwining with the sadness of losing him. How could she hate and love someone as much as she did her father? Was it even possible? And just what was this book her father had refused to part with? Never had he mentioned it before this. Just what was this final secret?

"Lucy?" Lucy closed her eyes tightly as she heard the door open, pulling her knees even tighter to her body. The creaking of the boards signified the person walking toward her. She felt the bed indent from the added weight, a warm body suddenly surrounding her. Without looking, she knew who it was by the way her heart warmed at the touch.

"Natsu…" Her voice cracked, which was a direct result from countless hours of crying. At his name, Natsu tightened his hold on her, nuzzling his nose into the back of her neck.

"What can I do?" She could hear the desperation in his voice, the need to save her evident. Lucy was at a loss for words, not sure what answer to give him. Slowly, as if pain wracked her body, Lucy turned to face Natsu.

"I keep asking myself that same question," She whispered. Natsu stared at her silently, Lucy dropping her gaze to his chest. She placed her hand over his heart, feeling the slow beat vibrate throughout her own body. His warmth was comforting, and she felt herself needing to feel more.

"Lucy?" Natsu's voice showed his confusion as she started to slide his shirt up his body. She didn't answer her name, pulling the shirt completely off of him. He tried not to let his body warm at her touch, but the way she was sliding her fingers against his abs made him shiver. He went to question her actions, when Lucy leaned up to kiss him. The kiss tasted salty, and Natsu winced when realizing it was from her previous tears. He kissed back, running his hand through her hair to comfort her.

When he felt her hand sliding toward his jeans, he quickly grabbed her wrist and pulled back from the kiss.

"No." His tone was firm, Lucy trembling as she tried to break his hold.

"Please, Natsu."

"Doing this now will only cause you pain later on. I know that right now, this feels like the right thing. But if we use our first time on a night like this, you'll never be able to forget it. And you'll regret it, Luce. I don't want you to regret me."

At his quiet reasoning, Lucy felt her tears refilling her eyes. Ashamed of her desire to escape the pain at any cost, Lucy buried into Natsu's warm embrace. Natsu welcomed her sadness, continuing to run his fingers through the weeping girl's hair.

"Why didn't he tell me? Why…why wouldn't he let me say goodbye?" Her choked words pained Natsu, who tightened his hug on his best friend.

"I don't know if you'll ever get that answer, Luce. But no matter what, know I'm here for you every step of the way."

"You promise?" She lifted her head slightly, looking up to his serious face and nod.

"Always." No more words were exchanged, Natsu holding Lucy throughout the darkness of night. It didn't take long for the exhausted girl to fall asleep, but Natsu fought off the urge to rest. He didn't want to be sleeping when Lucy needed him. Instead, he kept himself busy watching her, entranced by her slumbering serenity. He couldn't keep his hands idle, tracing the softness of her skin or threading them through silky blond hair. Tear lines stained each of her cheeks, and Natsu wished he had the power to erase her pain. But he knew that the death of a parent wasn't something to be cured quickly. Time was what she needed, and he was no wizard.

Even if I was, I'd never have a lame power like time. Now fire, that's where it's at! Blowing things up, kicking ass…maybe I could eat fire. Like a dragon! His mind chimed in, making his grin appear momentarily. He glanced down at their hands, which were now twined together. Running his thumb over the back of her hand, he felt his heart warm. And Luce would be even cooler, I bet. A powerful celestial wizard. With all her knowledge about the Zodiac, I'm sure she'd have no problem mastering their abilities. We'd be partners, of course. The best team in all of Fiore. Only the best for Lucy…

He blinked when she snuggled closer to his side, his name passing through her drowsy lips. His blush was overshadowed by his smile, Natsu placing a soft kiss to her forehead.

"My Celestial wizard," he whispered against her skin, letting the rest of the night pass in blissful silence.

"This place is huge!" Natsu's eyes widened as he stared at the mansion in front of him. His gaze was shared by Gray and Erza, though Lucy lacked the same shock. It was her childhood home, after all.

"My dad is—" Lucy stopped, tightening her hand on her purse at the slip up. "Sorry. Dad was a really successful business man. My mother and I never went without, financially. Anything we desired, we got. Except my father's attention, of course."

"Are you sure you're ready to do this?" Erza's concerned tone was obvious to everyone else in the group. It had been three days since Lucy heard of her father's death. Both Gray and Erza demanded they come when hearing about Lucy and Natsu's destination for the day. Though Natsu was against the company, neither would take no for an answer. To them, there was no other place they needed to be more than by their friend's side.

Lucy was more grateful for their support than they knew.

"My father's office has been locked since his passing. Zoldeo left a key at my apartment to get into it." Lucy walked through the gardens near the front entrance of the mansion, politely waving to any servants who called her name. Natsu looked at the several maids and butlers bustling around, each one stopping to bow to Lucy in respect. He tugged on his collar slightly, not used to such a high class situation. If this was anyone else, he would have high tailed it out of there by now.

"Natsu, calm down. It's not like they're judging you." Gray's cool demeanor made Natsu fume, glaring to the composed guy next to him. Of course Gray fit right in, the pompous ass. Even though he hadn't been raised by his biological parents, Ur was very strict on manners. He was used to being proper. For a Fairy Tail brat like Natsu, manners were not on the top of lists to be taught in a bar. Mira and Erza both tried later on in life with him, but by then he was far too old to listen to their instructions.

The group walked through a few halls, the clamor of movement starting to die with each step they took.

"My father kept his office as far away from the house as possible; he claimed it was hard to work on deals with noise," Lucy mumbled, rolling the office key in her hand. Memories of her childhood flooded her as she walked down the hall. She could see herself childhood self running to her father's office several times, hoping to get him to play with her and Layla. She couldn't remember a time that it ever worked. Her eyes lowered on her feet, wondering what her father would say seeing her now. He most likely would complain about her attire; he hated the fact she loved skirts. As if he could see her, Lucy casually tugged on her jean skirt while stopping just outside a huge set of mahogany doors. She stared at the entrance for a few moments, her hands resting on the cool wood.

"I don't want to open these doors," she whispered, closing her eyes tightly. "If I open these doors and see the empty chair, then it's all real. My father will be gone and I'll be…"

"You won't." Lucy felt warmth on her shoulder, glancing over to the soft smile of Erza. Squeezing her friend's shoulder, Erza gave her a confident nod. "You won't be alone, Lucy. We will always be with you, no matter what. Natsu, Gray, everyone in the bar. We'll always pick you up, no matter how deep you fall in."

"Having demons in your closet is kind of a requirement for Fairy Tail. That means that we'll never look at you differently for relying on us from time to time." Gray leaned on the wall next to the door, giving Lucy a serious look. "Protecting each other is what we do best. You're no exception."

"Whatever's in there, let's take it on together." Natsu's hand wrapped around her own, pushing the key straight into the lock of the door. He paused at actually unlocking it, glancing to Lucy.

"Erza, Gray…Natsu. Thank you." She took a deep breath, unlocking the doors and pushing both of them open. She shielded her eyes at the sunlight that came from the huge windows, which were normally covered with dark curtains. Lucy slowly walked into the room, not releasing her grip on Natsu's hand. A wave of nostalgia washed over her, leaving her breathless. Even after all the years that had passed since last stepping foot in the office, barely anything had changed. Besides the lack of curtains, her father's office remained frozen in time. Even the chair that he always yelled at her in was still there, as if waiting for him to return. Lucy felt a sting in her heart, but not as deep as she had feared.

"He said the desk drawer would have the book."

"Take your time," Gray warned, knowing the pain all too well. Lucy let go of Natsu's hand to move to the desk, not giving her emotions time to stall her. Opening the drawer, Lucy's eyes fell on the cover of a book that she had never seen before. Old in binding, Lucy was hesitant to pick it up in fear it would break. Slowly she removed it, sitting in the office chair to get a better look.

This writing looks so…familiar…

She couldn't place it, but the penmanship was nostalgic. Running her fingers over the cover, she finally focused on the actual title. Instantly, she realized who wrote it.

"Lucy's Astrology; Life Lessons from a Mother to her Daughter." Looking up at her friends, Lucy clutched the book to her chest. "My mother wrote a book. About me."

And the ball drops! Sorry for all that heaviness in one chapter, but it needed to be done. Hope you all enjoyed the moments of laughter and fluff too! So, what does this book hold for Lucy? Will it change her relationship with Natsu? If so, in what way? And does Gajeel win the award for biggest cockblock of the year? With only a few chapters until the end, everything is starting to come together! See you next time, after you review of course!

Chapter 15: Let's Talk about Sex, Maybe?