As of November 24, 2012, New Girl, Old Story is 1 year old! And if you don't include the chapter I used to ask for help on the series, we're also celebrating my 50th chappy! And I'm bored, so I decided to make a super special bonus b-day/50th chappy!
We get to take a look at all the s*** C.J has done in her life! Underlined and italics are the topic, and then their numbered off! Please enjoy this little break! P.S: By them, I probably mean C.J's parter Train and other people from the station.
Ch. 51: Happy Birthday C.J!
Bets that C.J has Lost!
#1: She had catch 4 quarters in a cup…with her right hand (as she is a lefty) and on 1 foot.
Her punishment: She had to play Slender until she won!
#2: Every bet she's ever made on a football and or other sporting events.
Obviously, she lost money.
#3: That she could train a cat to sit.
No punishment, they just wanted to see her try.
#4: That she could camp outside at night without coming indoors once after playing Slender. (Those jerks dressed up their tallest, skinniest guy like Slendy and had him scare her s***less.)
Punishment: She had to gagman style all over town at random…and let them make a montage video.
#5: That she could just HIT the target in archery within the first ten tries.
Punishment: She had to wear cat ears and tail in public for a month.
Bets She Won!
#1: That she could win an arm-wrestle with the beefy guy in the gorilla suit that was hanging around at the corner store for unknown reasons.
Reward: $20!
#2: That she couldn't walk into Wal-Mart, steal a minimum of $100 worth of merchandise, and park it all on the side. (She did all of this, riding out of the garden department on a $90 mountain bike, with three $15 candles $20 worth of flash drives in her pockets. All merchandise was returned along with a lengthy explanation and an apology. As you can imagine, the next day they had fifteen new security guards and she is no longer allowed in that Wal-Mart. C.J- They even took my finger prints!)
Reward: $155!
#3: That she couldn't sumo toss Train at least 5 feet
Reward: Seeing Train in pain.
#4: Doing all the things that could possibly get you kicked out of Wal-Mart, and NOT getting kicked out!
Things She's Done Purely Out of Boredom!
#1: Made a list of every f***** up thing she could find in each Disney movie she could find.
#2: Made a homemade dart board, using cardboard, glue, pictures of criminals still at large, and a steak knife.
#3: Make strange and disturbing scenes out of the snow when she happens to be somewhere that snows. (For instance; snowmen gathered around a car to mourn the loss of their snowman friend…now without his head….)
#4: Setting personal records, such as how long can she keep an ice cube stuck to her tongue, etc.
#5: Sleeping. Until like, 3:00 pm.
#6: Setting up boxes and other such junk like little army men into a little city…and sending her cat through while laughing manically.
Pranks She's Pulled.
#1: Painting 'inconspicuous white van' on the side of a white van that always sat on the edge of her neighborhood used and junked car lot.
#2: Hiding out under the stairs of the office and scaring the s*** out of people by grabbing their ankles and making the Grudge noise.
#3: Cut a hole in a box, set it up to hold the Halloween candy bowl, and grabbing kids that took more than 1.
#4: switching the office coffee machine to espresso after a month on decafe.
Her Mottos
"Never give up!"
"You should always keep a neat workspace…I should, not that I do…."
"Arrive late, leave early."
"There's only 1 day even unluckier that Friday the 13th…Monday the 13th…f****** Monday."
"If reality as we know it is just an illusion spawned of highly intelligent beings, why are so many people in the world complete a**holes?"
"Ninjas…ninjas are everywhere…."
ALRIGHT, THAT WRAPS THIS EXTREMLY SHORT AND IRELIVANT CHAPPY. *YAWN* SORRY ABOT THIS, REALLY. WE HAD TO GO BLACK FRIDAY SHOPPING AND I'M BEAT. ANYWAYS, HOPE YOU LIKED, REVIEW, WHATEVES.
