12- Clouded Thoughts
Ichigo still awake after an hour or two talking to the redhead Assistant Captain, just plain talking. Both stirring away from the conversation leading to the orange haired Kurosaki's inner Hollow. But one question shook him, and he didn't expect someone like Renji to ask.
"Are you going to miss him? When he leaves, I mean,"
Shit! I shouldn't have told him that! the vibrant haired teen thought bitterly, eyes hazed over while being half-lidded, heart slowly beating at the thought of loosing his other half, contemplating on whether he would miss Shirosaki or not. I don't know…I have no fucking clue in hell.
Renji blinked his reddish-brown eyes, looking at the teenager with a quirked tattooed brow, wondering if he pushed too hard. It was hard enough for him to pry the sealed door to Ichigo's inner turmoil open, and then he realized he might've hit a nerve.
"Look, I was just wonderin', ya know?" he added hastily. Those brown eyes gazed up at him, but the pale form didn't raise his head. "Sorry…I must've asked too soon."
"Maybe," he complied in a hushed tone, slowly laying back down, his bandaged wounds throbbing, voice hurting because of the burn on his neck, "I…don't really know…"
Renji looked down on his laced fingers on his lap, forearms resting on them as he took in a calm breath, trying to reorganize his thoughts. The teenager already told him about how he became a Soul Reaper, the run in with the Grand Fisher, his training with Urahara, entering the Soul Society, fighting Ikkaku, Kenpachi, the redhead's captain, and then the story lead over to his Hollow, leaving out the parts with odd-timed kisses. Almost everything, as though the Zabimaru possessor were reading a talking book on Ichigo's life.
He even shared some secrets, he thought as he lifted his head to see Ichigo looking out the window with saddened eyes, the brown turning into a honey-like color. But…I know I can just listen and try to understand.
"Ichigo,"
Said boy looked over at him, blinking as the honey color vanished, blood seeping out of his neck's flesh wound.
"Lay still you idiot, I don't want to patch that up too," he growled, furrowing his brows, swallowing the lump in his throat, "okay…so…Shirosaki hasn't been talking to you much at all lately."
"No," Came a simple reply, one intertwined with guilt and hurt, "not after I…almost killed him at Urahara's."
"Maybe you should try talking to him again, you know…just to…" He looked down on the wooden flooring, his eyes falling halfway shut, critically thinking on his choice of words. "Patch things up?"
Ichigo looked out the window again, neck throbbing as sadness crept through his emotional barrier. It's going to rain, he thought bitterly, seeing the blue skies slowly twist and warp into deep grey, I hate rain…
He blinked, wondering on why he hated the raindrops now. Closing his eyes, he took in a slow breath, thinking how he was going to explain to Renji while figuring out why he despised rain.
"I guess," he spoke at last, "but I'm not sure Shirosaki wants to."
That's why,
"You never know unless you try, dumbass." the redhead sighed, shaking his head as he glanced up at the darkening sky as well, then down on the eldest Kurosaki sibling, thinking the weather changing suited the situation. "I need to go, sorry, Ichigo, just try to talk to him. I'll be back sometime tomorrow."
With that he stood, walking away as the orange haired teenager shut his eyes. We're closer…that's why rain depresses me.
"Shirosaki," he breathed, reopening his eyes and staring at the glass window, seeing the albino's back turned to him, making his call's volume rise, "Shirosaki."
"What do you want, partner?"
"Look at me,"
The figure turned slowly in the mirror, golden-black eyes half-lidded, staring at him sideways, giving Ichigo a good look at his profile.
"Shirosaki," he whispered softly, only loud enough for his other half to hear, "why aren't…you talking to me anymore?"
The ivory colored Hollow's gaze fell to the floor, his mouth twitched into an unpleasant feature, brows furrowed. As though he didn't know how to answer the question one bit, or even as to why he wasn't speaking to the vibrant haired teenager at all.
He lifted his left hand and scratched the back of his neck, craning it to the side with a scowl slowly dancing across his handsome, pale, features.
"I can't say," he spoke at last, "at least…not out here, come into your inner world, I'll explain what I can there."
Ichigo slowly nodded, closing his eyes with a content breath and hearing this made Shirosaki glare at the right side of him, cursing the desires of wanting a body separate from the young Kurosaki's own, cursing the fact that it was so powerful that his host could taste it.
Ichigo reopened his eyes, seeing that he was resting against Shirosaki's back, the form leaping from skyscraper to skyscraper, his arms wrapped securely around the albino's slender neck, the Hollow's arms looped around his legs, holding him close.
"Shiro…?"
His dark half glanced over his shoulder at him with a lopsided grin, weaker than the others, causing the lightly tanned teen's heart to slowly slump down from its perch and glide down to his stomach.
"Where…are we going?"
"Far away from that silent up the ass Old Man,"
"Zangetsu?"
Shirosaki nodded slowly, looking back ahead with Ichigo's brown orbs following his gaze and blinking once he saw a black abyss ahead, making him bite his lower lip, wondering if he should fight to get away or continue to enjoy the warmth radiating off of the demon.
"…to tell you the truth," the albino muttered, yet the pale form caught his words, "I don't wanna talk to you…because of my decision, about getting myself my own body, and…I thought it'd be best if we never spoke to each other ever again, but…" He veered over his shoulder with a warm smile directed for show only to the confused, yet, frowning Kurosaki as he tightened his grasp around his other half's neck, pressing closer. "You just won't give up."
"Damn straight," the teen hissed.
The white form chuckled, his shoulders shaking from the might of its strength, closing his eyes with relaxation as the shinigami's grasp on him lessened.
"Let's fight," he spoke, opening his brilliant golden orbs, glancing over his shoulder to see a wide eyed Ichigo Kurosaki, and seeing this made him grin, "it'll loosen you up a bit, you're too tense."
"And for good reason," the teen huffed, glaring at the snow white haired form, "that Hollow's not dead yet, Shirosaki, I just know it. I can't relax knowing that it could pop up again and kill Rukia for good…or anyone else."
"It's because you don't wanna see me disappear again," Shirosaki accused, tone sharp like a blade to a Zanpaku-to, "that's why you don't wanna fight me."
Ichigo backed up a bit, hands clinging to the demon's shoulders, his bangs bouncing back and forth in front of his face, his white teeth clamping down on his lower lip. His brows were furrowed while the brown eyes were shut, face showing off resistance to protest, or something much more.
"That's not it," the lightly tanned teen breathed, releasing his lower lip.
"I won't permanently die, dumbass, you've stabbed me enough times to prove that fucking fact, now fight me."
The alabaster form's feet landed gently on the dark clouded ground, puffs of it lifting from the pavement as he set the bright haired boy down, reaching behind himself and coiling his fingers around the white and black blade's bandaged hilt.
Before Ichigo could protest, the white form vanished from his line of sight, appearing next to him a second later, sword swinging with the full intent to kill. Grasping the hilt to his Zanpaku-to, the vibrant haired teen leapt up from the spot where he was frozen, bringing Zangetsu down to block the mirror's uppercut, blades colliding with the loud clang and sparks flying everywhere as Shirosaki pushed up, bending his legs and lunging forth, knocking Ichigo back.
With a gasp from shock, the boy swiftly brought the large blade down, blocking the strike that would've pierced through his chest un-forgivingly.
Thrusting his right hand forth, Shirosaki wrapped his fingers around the other's right wrist, yanking it forth for they were face to face, different emotions flashing through the duplicates' eyes.
Ichigo's was shock, pure shock, fear, anger…mixed and random.
All that the Hollow's showed was anger and resentment. Angered by the fact that Ichigo would up and lie to him, him of all people, his other half.
He located his mouth near the pale form's ear, smirking as he felt the muscles in the boy's arm tighten from determination, recollecting his scattered mind and piecing it together.
"Don't hold back,"
Ichigo's brown eyes flickered, shoving the other away with his free hand, throwing his right arm back, bending his knees a bit as he bit his lower lip, growling as he furrowed his brows, the edges of his eyes glistening a brilliant sky blue.
"Bankai," Was whispered as his blue Spiritual Energy lashed about around him, his outfit changing entirely, "Getsuga Tensho!"
The white form smirked, lifting his blade and swinging it down violently, releasing the same attack while flash stepping to get behind Ichigo, grinning as he slapped a hand against the teenager's back.
"La luz de luna," Shirosaki whispered, his hot breath caressing the back of the eldest Kurosaki's ear.
Swinging around, Ichigo growled as he swung the blade hastily, only to have it be caught by the inner demon, blood dripping from the large slit in his palm once he tossed the blade aside.
Leaping back, the orange haired teenager spun around, Zanpaku-to clashing once again as Shirosaki stood beside him, their shoulders being pressed together as they pushed, trying to gain the advantage.
"That's it," Shirosaki chuckled as the spiky haired shinigami swept his left foot across the ground, almost tripping the Hollow, who pushed forward with pure determination, knocking them both down as they grabbed hold of the other's sword. "You're calming down, good."
"Shut up," the teen scowled, glaring at him as he tore his sword's hilt out of his hand, tossing it aside while grabbing onto the front of his kimono. "Why do you keep toying with me?!"
"I'm not,"
"Then why're y-"
"Trying to calm you down," he interrupted simply, as though it was the most obvious fact in the world, "if you're too tense while fighting…your judgment is clouded, who knows…you might accidentally kill one of your comrades that way."
Ichigo looked down on the ground, releasing the albino's clothing, both slowly standing as the bright haired Kurosaki slowly looked back up into Shirosaki's golden-black eyes.
"Thanks," he mumbled, dropping his head as light began to seep through the darkness around them, a skyscraper slowly fading into view below their feet, sideways clouds slowly floating upwards in the bright blue sky. "I needed that…the fight, I mean."