Donnie popped his head into Gabby's bedroom to see the three girls all piled on Gabby's bed. He couldn't help but smile at the bond they shared. He knew it to be as close a bond as he shared with his brothers.
"Can I come in?" He asked.
"Of course, Donnie." Gabby said. "You're not a complete asshat like your brother."
Donnie entered the room. "How's the leg?" He asked.
"It aches a little bit but our bodies heal pretty quickly so it's a lot better than it was a couple hours ago." She replied, but her leg and her out of line Alpha was wasn't something she wanted to talk about. "So did you have fun at the party last night?" She asked. The way she was arching her eyebrow suggested Saffron had told them all about it. He grinned sheepishly.
"It was the best night of my life so far." He admitted. A quick glance at Ronnie told him he had definitely said the right thing. Her eyes were shining and a big grin was plastered all over her face. "I was just headed for the library." He continued. "For an Alpha, Raph is entirely too uneducated in the life of a Were. I'm going to force feed him books until he knows better. I was just wondering if you wanted to join me Ronnie." He looked at her expectantly.
She hopped off of the bed. "Lead the way!" They exited the room together to the excited whispers of the sisters.
"So have you seen Raph since it all happened?" She asked. She assumed that he knew what she was talking about since he hadn't seemed surprised by Gabby's leg.
"Yeah. We had a talk with him but you know how impossible he is. Nothing is ever his fault and he's always right. At least Gabby knows how to shame him into admitting he's messed up. He plans on seeing Em again."
"Well of course he does." Ronnie said. "She took his virginity, it's natural for him to feel close to her after sharing an experience like that. I've asked around about her though and you know what? I don't think he's going to be into her for very long."
"Why?" Asked Donnie.
"She's an interior design specialist here. She dislikes fighting. She doesn't even like doing outdoors stuff unless she's running or hunting with the pack. She seems too dull for Raph." Saffron said.
"I hope so." Donnie said. "I see Gabby's reasoning for flying off the handle about this. I don't want his relationship to her to be a detriment to the pack." They walked into the library and Saffron led him to a few different sections where they collected books on wolf biology, pack politics, and a couple wolf history books. Saffron picked the one she had given to Donnie, as well as a world history one that involved the big situations from packs around the world.
"These should do." She said as she stacked the last one in Donnie's arms. He set them down on a nearby table and turned to face her.
"About last night." He said. She raised her eyebrows at him, waiting with a sinking feeling in her stomach. Was he going to reject her? "I just….well…." He was flustered, like he couldn't find the words so instead he stepped closer. He put his hand along her jawline, tipping her face upward and brought his lips down to hers. He was slow and gentle, giving her ample opportunity to pull away from him if she wanted, but she didn't. Dear god the last thing she wanted to do was pull away right then. As a matter of fact, she was contemplating dragging him to the reading couch a few yards away and having her way with him but she figured that would be a little too much a little too soon. He interrupted her thoughts by pulling away from her, eyeing her uncertainly. She realized that he wanted to know how she felt about the two of them and he was scared to ask.
"I like you, Donnie." She said. "I want to be your girlfriend."
He chuckled a little as his tension eased. "Since you asked so nicely." He teased. He swooped in again and pressed his lips to hers in a much more demanding kiss. One that stole her breath and pressed her entire body against his. She was practically panting when he pulled away again.
"You got really good at that overnight." She said breathlessly.
"I had a good teacher." He grinned.
They gathered up the books and went and deposited them in Raph's room and then decided to watch a movie. They decided on The Hobbit and Saffron climbed into Donnie's lap, cuddling in to his chest. His fingers trailed over her skin as they watched, marveling at the softness and the warmth of it. He was so happy. He had wanted her for weeks and now she was his.
Back in Gabby's room, Gracie was braiding her hair. With a broken leg, Gabby couldn't go anywhere so Gracie had made it her personal mission to keep her occupied for the next couple of days.
"You know what I think." Gracie said to her sister.
"What?" Gabby asked. She was still grumpy over the whole situation.
"I think that Raph is secretly into you." She replied.
"He slept with another girl last night. I don't see how you're going to argue your case here." Gabby pointed out.
"He's closest to you out of all of us." Gracie said.
"Yeah, because I'm his She-Alpha and I'm the one who's spent the most time with him. I needed to teach him to control and manipulate his bonds. I needed to show him how a Were is trained to fight so he would know what to look for in a challenge. Those were my responsibilities and so I ended up with him more than anyone."
"It's not that." Gracie said. "It's the way he looks to you. It's how he feels like he needs you to make a decision. Like he wants to make sure you're happy about it."
"That's because he's a giant idiot and doesn't go out of his way to learn about the way things are done in a pack." Gabby retorted. "Without me guiding him he would crash and burn."
Gracie just smiled smugly behind her sister. "Think what you want. I think he likes you. Even better, I think you like him."
"I don't do the whole liking people thing." Gabby said. "There's too much going on for me to get involved."
"Why?" Gracie asked. "Ronnie's over there getting involved with Donnie right now."
"Yeah, well Ronnie isn't under threat of being captured and raped now is she?" Gabby said.
"Don't do that." Gracie scolded her older sister for once. "Don't bring him into this place unless you absolutely have to."
Gabby sagged a little. "I'm sorry. It's just so hard. Everything he's done. Everything he's taken away. I thought it would be better here and it is, but he still keeps me from being able to live my life. I know I'm going to face him again and I don't want to drag anyone else down with me if it comes to that." Gracie continued to braid her sister's hair in silence. Her sister rarely opened up and let people in. She rarely shared the burden she fought so hard to carry alone. "I want to date and fall in love." Gabby continued. "I want a mate and pups and a pack. I want to go back to Minnesota and run through the forest and hunt and be free, but I can't even let myself hope that because if he were to take me, then I would be broken. All of my dreams would be shattered and I think I would go Rogue and that's one thing I promised myself he would never do to me. He could take my freedom and my body and my pack but he would never take my humanity and I can't let him break my dreams so I just decide to not dream. I tell myself every day that I will never be free and I will never have children or a loving mate or a territory of my own." Tears were rolling down her cheeks now. "I don't mean to be so negative all of the time or so hard on everybody but it's hard when he's looming in my every thought."
Gracie's arms wrapped around her sister and she held her close, rocking her. "It's okay Gabby. I understand where you're coming from. I didn't make those promises to myself though so I'll tell you what. I'll do the dreaming for you, and when Aiden is dead and gone I'll tell you every dream we could dream up and how we're going to do them. Okay?"
"What if you die?" Gabby asked. "What if Mom dies or Ronnie dies? What if Leo or Raph or Mikey or Donnie dies? There's no way we're going to escape this war without casualties."
"Well then I'll write your dreams down in a book and if I die then you can read them out of there, and if anyone else dies then I'll be here with you. I'll hold you together when you feel like coming apart. But honestly Gabby, you need to let those fears go until they actually mean something. If you hold on to them now, you're going to miss out on a lot of fun and happy times. We're in a pack. We're protected. Carl and Aiden are going to be scouting each other for months before the war happens. Try to take some time to live a normal life."
Gabby sniffed as her tears slowed to a stop. "You're right, Gracie. I don't know what I'd do without you." She squeezed her sister in a tight hug.
"You'd live or I'd come back and haunt you." She teased. Gabby gave a wet laugh and pulled away.
"I really just love you sometimes." She said. "Except when you steal my clothes. I want that top back by the way."
Gracie laughed. "Fine, but I want my shoes back."
The sisters laughed together and fell back into doing each other's hair. "I still can't believe he slept with her." Gabby said. "And then broke my leg!"
"Well even though I don't agree with him, I can't say I blame him." Gracie said.
"WHAT?!" Gabby barked as she whipped around to face her sister.
"Raph is being stupid, yes, but did you even take a minute to try and tell him why in a calm and collected manor?" Gracie asked.
Gabby stuttered over that one. Honestly she hadn't. She had just been yelling at him since she first saw them together. "Well, no, but he should know better. He's been with us for a month and a half, there's really no excuse for his complete ignorance to the way we work."
"I'm not saying he's in the right here but you aren't either. You're supposed to be a She-Alpha. You're supposed to be able to diffuse a situation and act calmly and responsibly. Raph may need to make a few changes if he wants to smooth things over with you but you have some changing of your own to figure out."
Gabby wanted to defend herself but she tried taking on her sister's advice and calmed herself down and tried looking objectively at the facts. She had flown off the wall and been over aggressive to both Em and Raph. She was projecting her messed up life and her messed up emotions onto her pack which was detrimental. She handled the situation badly. She sighed. "Just when did you get so smart and grown up?" Gabby asked.
Gracie smiled. "I haven't been a kid for a long time. I've seen the same stuff you have. I've been through it. I decided a long time ago that I wouldn't let it become who I am though. I stay true to myself and my hopes and dreams and that keeps me who I am. Just cuz I act all fun and bouncy doesn't mean I can't be grown up and serious. Now go find Raph and apologize for your behavior and have a civil and grown up conversation."
Gabby grabbed for her crutches and brushed her mind against Raph's he tried to close her out but she forced her way in much to his displeasure.
"What do you want? I'm busy." He said. She could tell he was with Em.
Will you come to the guest lounge? I want to talk to you." She said.
"No." He replied.
"Raphael." She used his full name. She didn't scold and she didn't yell, but she put enough emphasis on it that he would know it was important. "I'm asking you. Please."
She felt a hint of worry pass through his thoughts. She didn't speak to him like that very often.
"Fine. Be there in five." He replied.
She hobbled to the guest lounge and plopped onto a couch. She adjusted her leg so it was comfortable and waited. Raph made his entrance after a few minutes, a scowl plastered on his face. He saw her leg on the couch and he was filled with guilt. He looked at her. She was still in her pajamas like she had been this morning but her hair was neatly braided into two French braid pigtails, and her eyes looked puffy and red like she had been crying. She looked so young and with a sigh, he dropped into a chair opposite of her and leaned forward with his elbows on his knees. His hand covered his eyes in an uncharacteristic display of exhaustion. He realized that although Gabby knew a lot of things and took her role as leader seriously, she was really just a kid in some ways. They all were. Even him and his brothers. They were all too young to be caught up in all of this war stuff. None of them had ever really had the chance to be irresponsible teenagers as it was and now they had a pack to care for and a bad Alpha to kill. Didn't they have enough problems without laying into each other?
"I don't want to fight." Raph said tiredly.
"I know." Gabby said. "Me either. That's why I wanted to talk to you. I have to say some things and you might not like to hear them but I don't want you to interrupt me until I'm done talking, okay? Even if I say something completely uncalled for. Can you do that for me?"
"Yeah. I'll listen." Raph promised.
Gabby took a deep breath and let it out slowly, collecting her thoughts. "I wanted to start with an apology." She said. "The way I was behaved was completely out of line. It was not very Alpha-ish of me and it wasn't how the situation should have been handled. This," She said gesturing at her leg, "was my fault. I wouldn't back down and you forced my submission as any Alpha would. I'm sorry I've been projecting all of my life's frustrations onto you. I'm going to work on myself. I'm going to try and do better. That being said, I need you to do better Raph." His scowl returned and he opened his mouth to say something. She held up her hand. "Just listen." She said. "You aren't the only one to blame that you don't know enough about wolves to function in our society. I've been more focused on keeping all of us alive than I have been about teaching you what it is to be an Alpha, but you've been with us for a month and a half now and other than the first night you found out you were my Alpha you haven't asked any questions about what that might mean. You haven't picked up a book or even bothered to try and find out what you were walking into. You've relied on me and Donnie to supply you with the knowledge you need and that's not very Alpha-ish of you. You need to do better Raph. We both do. We owe it to our pack and to ourselves. We're supposed to be a team. Now I can understand if you're angry about the stuff I said. If that's the case and you don't feel like you can have a calm conversation about it then just give yourself a couple of days to figure it out and we can talk again then. Alright?"
Raph looked at his She-Alpha with guarded eyes. Was he mad? Maybe a little but it was more with himself than anything. He hadn't realized that he would have to put effort into being an Alpha. He didn't even know what it really entailed. He sighed again.
"I'll do better." He promised.
"Good." Gabby said, relaxing a little. "Ronnie and Donnie picked you up some books from the library. They'll be helpful in learning about Were culture and history I'm sure. Also, I'm going to talk to Carl tomorrow to see if he'll take you on as an apprentice of sorts, like a Junior Alpha. If anyone can show you what it is to be an Alpha in the short amount of time that we have, it will be him. Is that okay with you?"
"Yeah." He replied.
"Thank you, Raph. It means a lot to me." Gabby said. "You can go back to Em now if you want. I won't interfere in that anymore. I just want you to know that if you do fall in love with her, it will weaken the entire pack. A pack needs strong leadership and a Theta won't provide that."
"Noted." Raph said as he stood. Gabby swung her leg off of the couch and reached for her crutches. She stood and followed Raph out of the lounge.