Cursed

by lossehelin

For a thousand years the village has known of the beast living in the old palace. A beast said to live on human blood. One father knows the truth, and is now bound by word to return a favor he has ignored for thirteen years.

32. Secrets, Doubts, and a Dream

So this chapter turned out to be a lot longer than I anticipated. Which is completely fine, however… I knew that I wasn't going to get it done like most of the others in one week, and since there is absolutely no chance of me even trying to write on Mondays, Tuesdays, or Wednesdays, I thought for sure I would finish it up on the second Thursday. Ha. As usual, something else always comes up. This time, however, it is really my own fault. I got completely hooked on reading a new manga I found, and could not stop reading it until I was finished. I stayed up every single night this last week, reading until the wee hours of the morning, even knowing that I have to wake up at 4:30am just to be at work. Now, I am left with that empty, frantic, excited mix of energy that ruins your day because low and behold… the manga hasn't been completed yet, either. Now, I must impatiently wait for the next volume to be published (or the next scan to be put online) before I can find out what happens. When explaining this to my boyfriend's grandmother, though, she just laughed and said, "Now you know how it feels." lmfao Please accept my sincerest apologies, and let me get back on track with my own wayward, stubborn, and love-sick characters. XD

Disclaimer: Yes, yes, all the standard things apply.

Chapter 32: Secrets, Doubts, and a Dream

Soft candlelight flickered her own image within the reflective surface of Kaoru's vanity mirror. It was late, the sun already down and cloaking the world in darkness, even the moon gone for the evening to rest. Lethargic, she watched her own movements as she brushed the hair pulled over one shoulder, the motion hypnotizing. Try as she might, her thoughts could not be brought to order, the ties and sequential regulation they normally practiced a scattering of petals in the wind. After fighting it for hours, Kaoru was no longer up to the challenge. Perhaps the mindlessness of routine was just what she needed to let herself relax.

Misao lay sprawled in the room next to her, bored and dozing. As the lady's personal handmaiden she was supposed to be with her most of the day, but there just wasn't much that a small weasel could really do. Kaoru tried to get rid of her as often as possible, mainly because she knew her small friend was restless and irritated with her inability to help. She liked having her company, but it was a bit depressing knowing she was unhappy, and Kaoru knew, no matter how much Misao denied it, that her own presence was the main culprit. Tonight, however, Kaoru had no excuse to dismiss her since Aoshi was gone on patrol.

Whenever the raven was gone Misao always seemed a little lost. It wasn't exactly noticeable, but after being around her almost constantly, Kaoru could tell. She would act distracted, and though her energy seemed never-ending, the pep in her step became just a bit forced. Kaoru thought it was amazing. For two people to be so much in love, and to still feel that love even after a thousand years of each other's company, was an achievement. Briefly she was envious, her heart ached with longing, and the disorder in her mind plucked out a memory and settled on it for contemplation.

Sighing, she continued to brush, her teeth chewing on her bottom lip relentlessly. She still didn't know what had gone wrong, well perhaps she did, but with the entire evening going so right, it seemed nearly impossible for anything to sour the warm atmosphere between them. Even still, it wasn't truly an unpleasant feeling that had developed, but a more intense version of awkward and unsure. Things were changing… but a decision needed to be made soon to figure out how.

Settling the brush down, Kaoru lifted her eyes up the mirror to her mouth, watching it part to draw in a breath. She had never really considered her mouth before, not in serious meditation, and to look at it now it seemed like something alien and new. Eyes blinking slowly as she studied her own lips intently, she spoke; perhaps to hear an answer, or perhaps just to watch them move.

"Misao-san… if I were to talk to you in confidence, you wouldn't tell anyone else, would you?"

Stretching her neck back to flatten the top of her skull against the floor, Misao looked at her mistress upside down. "Of course not, milady. After all, a lady's handmaiden is also her greatest confidant. It is an unspoken part of my duty."

"So I won't wake up tomorrow and hear the whole palace whispering my secrets?" Casting her eyes briefly over the weasel, she smiled slightly, but was completely serious. She knew how things worked around the palace. Hadn't Soujirou told her himself that it was the business of the servants to know everything going on in the lives of the nobles?

"On my honor, milady, I would not speak a word. Whatever you wish to share with me will go with me to the grave. And if you wish to hear proof, there are many secrets Lady Kinuko whispered to me that I have kept, even now after her death. I would never betray my mistress."

Heartened by her earnestness, Kaoru returned her gaze to her own image, sapphire irises once more drawn to her mouth. Voice a mere whisper, she curled both hands into the waterfall of her hair. "I think… Kenshin was going to kiss me." There was a startled series of soft thumps and then the sharp scrape of claws on the tatami. Hopping up onto the vanity, Misao's wide aquamarine eyes locked on her face, her words a squeak.

"Really?"

Surprised by her tone of eagerness and shock, Kaoru darted a look her way and blushed, a smile pulling her bottom lip from her teeth. "I think so, I mean… I'm pretty sure."

"Were you going to let him?"

Blush darkening, she looked back into the mirror and touched a finger to her lips. "Maybe."

Squealing in girlish delight, Misao jumped off the vanity and did a little somersault to express her excitement. "That's a yes!" Giggling and dancing around the room, she stopped on a sudden thought. "Wait. So he didn't really kiss you?"

"No." Taking a shaky breath, her eyes dropped to her lap. "He acted like he was going to, but then he… stopped."

Deflated, Misao rolled her eyes. It sounded like something her master would do. "Let me guess, he even apologized afterwards."

"Yeah." Response low, Kaoru sighed again, her fingers playing with her hair. Scrunching her face, Kaoru let the doubt that was upsetting her emotions show. "Do you… think it was just an accident? I mean… I'm not even sure if he knew what he was doing. And he stopped himself before it happened. What if… he wishes he hadn't, and I… I wish he had?"

"Well, milady, I don't really think that's something you need to worry about." Amused, Misao sat down next to her.

"How can you be sure?" Looking down at her, Kaoru's eyes were skeptical.

"Well, because what you said is very much true, milady. Lord Kenshin probably didn't have the slightest idea what he was doing."

"Oh." Kaoru's heart sank.

"After all, I've never once heard of any women visiting his pavilion, except for his mother."

Kaoru blinked, then blushed as understanding hit her. "Oh!" Lips twitching, she fought a grin. "Well… it's nice to be on some kind of even ground." Misao laughed as Kaoru giggled.

"Yes, milady. He was probably as unsure of his actions as you were, but I doubt that means he wishes he couldn't kiss you."

"Then why didn't he? It's not like… I was going to stop him." Embarrassed of the confession, and the grin Misao was showing over it, Kaoru turned her head to the side.

"But he didn't know that, milady." Placing her front paws on the lip of the vanity, Misao tried to crane her neck to see her mistress' features. "If he was unsure of his own actions, he wouldn't have been any more sure about your reaction. I know Lord Kenshin, milady, and when he's confused about anything it frustrates him."

"I know, I've seen that first hand, but… at least before I could help him. I… I don't think there's anything I can do this time. I mean… just because I…" Blushing, Kaoru couldn't bring herself to finish the thought, and cleared her throat instead. "Well, I can't tell him what he feels, so…"

"Actually, you're wrong, milady. You can help him."

"How?"

Jumping back up on the vanity, Misao sat herself directly in the middle so that Kaoru couldn't avoid her anymore. "You need to make it clear to him how you feel about your relationship."

"But…I thought I was…"

"No, not really. You must remember, that he himself has never had any experience with this type of relationship. You've given him too many things to think about that contradict any such decision on your part."

"Like what?" Alarmed, Kaoru's eyes widened and she leaned back.

"Like your friendship with Soujirou. All the time you spent with him. Don't think my master didn't feel irritated that you would be getting so cozy with his old rival, or that he didn't count every single time Soujirou's name popped up into your conversations." Kaoru's mouth opened in shock, but Misao glared and continued before she could argue. "And don't even get me started on that indecent display of affection."

"What indecent display of affection?" Voice squeaking in outrage, Kaoru felt a touch of anger. These people really needed to mind their own business and stop blowing everything out of proportion.

"That hug that nearly gave poor Soujirou a heart attack, what with the master stumbling upon you and all. You were already at odds with one another, I'm sure that was the last thing he needed to see, and you put poor Soujirou in a very awkward position."

"Kenshin saw that?" Thinking back, Kaoru suddenly understood. "No wonder he was so mad at me." Brows twitching, she pouted out a lip. "But I've hugged Kenshin too, and besides, it wasn't the same. I was just happy with what Soujirou-kun said."

"Yes, milady, and it must not be bothering him as much, but it is not completely out of his head, either. Because you have hugged on them both it only leaves more room for doubt. How can he be sure he is any more special to you than this servant?"

"Well, I…"

"There are many other factors, too, milady. You are kind to him, but you are indeed kind to everyone. If you spend more time with him, it is because you are friends, and have been since you were small. He will wonder if that is all you see. He will suspect every small detail of your actions as nothing more than the normal compassion you show for all life. He can't be sure, because you have given him no reason to be."

"I have too."

Grunting in exasperation, Misao closed her eyes. "You are going to have to be a little more forward than simply brushing his hair, though that is a good start, I suppose. Nobody has brushed his hair for him since his mother, so at least the action is connected to some form of deep affection."

Then why does he fight me over it? Huffing, Kaoru crossed her arms. "Do you guys know everything?"

Misao cracked a grin. "It is part of my duty to know everything about my mistress, milady. Especially when she is spending late nights in a man's pavilion." Bowing her head, she laughed when Kaoru growled. "Too bad nothing else besides hair grooming happened. Three nights of the good stuff and you wouldn't even need to worry about a wedding ceremony."

All the color drained out of her face and then came back in a surging rush of bright red. "WHAT?"

"Yep. Everything was much easier back in the day. Of course, the ceremonies now are nice too, but I think our way was much more fun."

"Once you slept with someone you were automatically married?"

"Oh no, you misunderstood completely. There was a level of custom in deciding who you wanted to marry, but virginity was pretty much optional."

"Oh my."

"Of course the courtship was a bit overemphasized if you ask me, but I don't think you'll have to worry about poetry from the master. Though, there were plenty of arranged marriages too, so it wasn't all about flowery words and gifts. Well, I guess it still was, but it was usually to the father and not the girl with those kinds. That's how Master Izo acquired all of his wives. He didn't care about having any of them. He just wanted babies and their family's influence."

"That makes me feel bad for his wives."

Misao shrugged at Kaoru's frowning face. "It wasn't all that bad for them. Now I'm not saying I would like the situation any better than you, but as a noblewoman they wouldn't have had much say anyway, and they knew that from the start. With Master Izo they were taken care of and they lived comfortably. Besides which, milady, they all had lovers."

Kaoru's eyes widened. "Really? That was allowed?"

"Yeah. As long as they were discreet about it, which they were."

"Even… even Kenshin's mom?"

"Oh no." Shaking her head, Misao corrected herself hurriedly. "Lady Kinuko allowed no one into her bed but her husband. She was a very proper lady, and she frowned on taking a lover. Also, she was very loyal to her husband. She was an amazingly moral lady, in comparison to the others, and it is probably most of the reason Lord Kenshin acts as stiff and formal as he does."

Seeing that Kaoru was nearly overloaded with information, Misao quickly added to be sure nothing she said would worry the girl. "Don't worry, milady, I doubt the master would make you do anything you don't wish to, and after the ceremony for Tae and Katsu, I think he is aware of the differences between what he used to know and what is practiced now." Kaoru nodded absently, and Misao tried to change the subject. It was clear the content was embarrassing the girl. "It was good that you mentioned the ceremony for Tae and Katsu, actually, milady. It emphasized their special union, since they cannot be together in any other way but name. We were lucky, though, that Anji has kept up with the religions, otherwise no one would have been able to perform it."

Another absent nod, and Misao cleared her throat. "Anyway, I think we strayed from the topic."

"Right." Shaking her head free of this new knowledge, Kaoru pulled in a deep breath and rifled back through their conversation to remember what they were originally talking about. "So I need to be more forward."

"That's right. You need to let him know how you feel so that he can no longer doubt your actions and focus more on his own."

"So what you're saying is… I need to kiss him?"

"Well… perhaps not that forward. You've pretty much been leading him through all of his problems since you got here, milady, and although we are all grateful, and I'm sure he is too, it hasn't given him much opportunity to be the… well, man. Guys need to feel like they're in control, so I would suggest letting him make the first move. What you need to do is encourage him into that."

"That doesn't explain anything. How am I supposed to be more forward and let him know for sure how I feel when I can't do anything."

"Get creative. You don't have to jump in a man's lap to get him to understand what you want."

"Right." Blushing again, Kaoru scratched her nails through her bangs. This is as bad as Tomoe's advice. How am I supposed to handle this delicately when I can't be delicate. Shoulders drooping, her thoughts screeched to a halt. How was this new turn going to affect what she was supposed to be doing with the curse?

Mistaking Kaoru's silence, Misao sighed. "Why don't you sleep on it. You don't have to come up with something right away. Just trying to act intentionally more affectionate with him will help, too." Jumping off the vanity, Misao trotted to the door. "Goodnight, milady."

Whispering her own goodnight, Kaoru looked back to the mirror, everything once again in turmoil. How selfish of her. Here she was thinking only about herself, when she should have been thinking past her own wishes and desires and to the possible outcomes. So what if she wanted this, but was she completely sure this was something that he wanted? She was supposed to be trying to make him happy and comfortable; trying to help him enjoy life and open up. Love was double-edged. What if it turned wrong? What if they tried and it wasn't good for either of them? He wouldn't be happy then. This held the possibility of making things worse.

Misao could be wrong. After all, she wasn't Kenshin, how could she know what he wanted? What if his actions were only an accident? What if he was only trying to be friendly, had forgotten himself and who he was with, and slipped up? They had first met one another when she was a child of merely four. What if he still thought of her as that child? Sure she had spent more time with him now as an adult, but what if he couldn't see past that? What if it didn't even have anything to do with her age, but that they were merely friends and nothing more? And what if being friends with him would make him happier than being anything more?

She cared for everyone, and she wanted everyone to be happy and free, especially Kenshin. If this new change threatened the chance to break the curse… then perhaps she didn't need to tempt it at all. Frustrated, Kaoru began braiding her hair. But what if staying friends hurt his happiness, too? What if he did want more and her own withdraw and denial of his feelings hurt him? He would be too polite and kind to say so, of course, but it wouldn't matter, because the change would happen, and he would not be happy.

So I need to let him know where I stand, huh? Well, it would be great if I knew where he stood on it, too. Sticking her tongue out at her own reflection, Kaoru tied off her hair and turned away from the vanity. Crawling her way to her futon, she blew out the candle and climbed under the covers. She didn't know why everything had to be so confusing and difficult between them. The curse was only proving to make it worse, now that she knew even a part of what needed to be done to break it. She wished she knew what to do. She wished she knew someone else to talk to. She wished her mother was still alive. I wish I got to meet Lady Kinuko. I bet she knows her son better than anyone.

Yawning, Kaoru closed her eyes, and willed herself to relax into sleep. Under her sleeping robe her necklace glowed, warm and pink… an answering result of her wish.

"In this, young one, I can lend you my guidance."

X

Kaoru blinked in confusion, her eyes staring across the pond bordering the courtyard and to the other, smaller open pavilion on the other side. It was late afternoon, and it was hot. One lazy frog croaked at her, a relentless song that reverberated in the stillness, accompanied only by the chirp of crickets and the occasional sound of feet. Stepping forward to the edge, Kaoru blinked again, trying to rid herself of the vision, or convince herself that it was real. Eyes tracking their way down the veranda across the courtyard, she watched as the servant, for it had to be a servant carrying all the dishes, walked with back straight and arms loaded. The servant was human. Human and normal without a trace of the curse in sight.

Backing away from the edge, Kaoru jumped when a hand touched her sleeve, squeaking in alarm and twisting to place the culprit in front of her and in full view. Sapphire eyes wide, she stared as the hand that had touched her held up as if to say the owner had meant no harm and was sorry to startle her. Not sure how she knew that, as the woman, for it was a woman standing with her, had said nothing, Kaoru relaxed hesitantly. Vaguely she recognized the woman, and as her gaze swept over the court kimono and the veil covering her face, she relaxed completely. This was the presence that had comforted her through her visions of Kenshin. The Kenshin from the past who had killed relentlessly and burnt innocent villages. This woman was familiar, and in a place that felt so eerily unfamiliar, Kaoru was grateful to see her.

Pointing back behind her at the servant that was no doubt gone by now, Kaoru's face curled in question, but before she could ask, the woman was sweeping by her. Twisting to watch as she walked down the veranda, the woman stopped only twenty paces away and beckoned for her to follow. Snapping out of her daze, Kaoru quick-stepped to catch up. Seeing that Kaoru was coming now, the woman turned to lead her to the divider steps that left a passageway into the courtyard itself. Here she stopped, one arm lifting to halt Kaoru, and then the other pointed at the sturdy gate.

There was a small buzz of commotion as servants and retainers all stood waiting patiently for something. In only a few moments that something had the gates swinging open and the light buzz turned into a raucous den of noise and ordered chaos. Full sized war horses with men in armor paraded through first, men on foot plodding heavily in afterwards, all looking tired and worn. All except the leader, who proudly sat straight, his head held high, and his actions purposefully absent of any show of exhaustion.

A servant ran forward to grab the reins of this man's horse, holding the beast steady as the man dismounted. Movements short and impatient, he jerked off the helmet covering his head and threw it at another servant, not even looking to see if he caught it. Too surprised to look herself, Kaoru stared at this man, who appeared to be in his late forties, perhaps early fifties, as he walked, with amazing purpose towards the steps. He was tall, taller than her father, and looked to be in better shape than most of the young men she knew. His features were stern, his jaw firm and unyielding, and the dark gold of his irises were not approachable. Just the aura surrounding him said he was a powerful and dangerous man. As he stepped up the stairs opposite them, he didn't even spare one glance in their direction, but marched off down the veranda and disappeared into the palace, his tight, traditional topknot of red hair dark in the shadows of the roofing. A dazed part of Kaoru's mind told her that he must be Kenshin's father.

Loud laughter pulled her eyes away from line of retainers and servants that had followed the master, returning her attention to the war party. Another man, just as tall as the master, was boasting loudly to a group of four women surrounding him, his arms draped over their shoulders as he led them to the steps. The women all giggled and simpered at him, vulgarly letting him run his hands over parts of their bodies that made Kaoru blush. One look at him told her that he was one of Kenshin's brothers, his obvious resemblances to the master showing in his face. Though he was laughing, and looked to be not as stern, his features had a look of cruelty about them; a meanness his joviality could not hide. For a moment he did spare her a glance, his golden eyes running down her body suggestively, but dismissed her quickly. Too concerned with the looser women in his grasp, he disappeared in an opposite direction from the master, his red hair swinging heavily down his back in a tight braid.

Close behind him was a much bulkier man, his features expressionless behind the circle of red, facial hair around his mouth. In direct contrast to his father and brother, this man was completely bald, and Kaoru's conversation with Kenshin popped into her head. This was Isamu, and at first glance, she knew she disliked him. Not because he was cruel looking like the other, or stern and unapproachable like their father, but because she knew he used his strength to hurt others intentionally. Like poor Kamatari. Servants were following him as well, but they were subdued, defeated, and their eyes were empty. Disgust curled in Kaoru's gut, she was glad she never knew him.

A woman stood to the side as Isamu passed and Kaoru's sapphire eyes were drawn to her. Politely she bowed, her dark hair curtaining her face, and when she stood Kaoru couldn't help but smile. She was lovely, her kimono a beautiful contrast to her deep brown eyes, her face a picture of charm and serenity. There was something else about her, though, that attracted Kaoru to her. She looked to be kind and very gentle.

Once Isamu and his party were clear, this new woman stood straight and continued forward towards them. At the top of the steps she stopped, her posture perfect as she waited patiently. Dark eyes swept across the returning war party, and as intently as Kaoru was watching her, she saw every flicker of pleasure and delight ripple across her face, even though she only smiled in soft recognition. Hurried footsteps pounded across the yard, the smile became just a bit wider, and curiosity forced Kaoru to search for what had delighted this stunning lady.

At first Kaoru was shocked, and then briefly hurt. The man hurrying towards the lady, this man she was so happy to have back, who raced up the steps to wrap his arms around her, was the same man painted in the picture tucked away in Kenshin's room. His hair was tied off lower, but the resemblances were uncanny. Even the look on his face held the same picture of love and devotion towards this woman. If this was Kenshin, than who was she? It couldn't be his mother, because no man would great his mother in such a fashion. Especially with such a tender and heartfelt stolen kiss.

The pain in her chest intensified, but she could do nothing but gaze wretchedly at the pair as they doted on one another; so happy, so very much in love. And he was so handsome; so confident; so gentle. He was everything she knew Kenshin could be, and then still more. A loving, forgiving, part of her was glad for the bliss and happiness he had apparently found. Glad that he had this love. Another part wallowed in self-pity and black envy.

Frowning, Kaoru's memory decided to contradict. Hadn't Megumi-sensei said that Kenshin had never been married? Hadn't Misao-san said that he was inexperienced? How could he be so confident here and not when she knew him? How could he be so familiar with this woman when he was so unsure with her? And why did he look to be older than the other two brothers when he was the youngest?

Blinking Kaoru watched the man she thought to be Kenshin finally take the last step up onto the walk and realized for the first time how tall he really was. Much taller than the lady standing next to him, and she didn't seem to be much taller than Kaoru herself. Kenshin wasn't much taller than her… which meant this man wasn't Kenshin, he was…

"I missed you, Shinta-sama. I do not like it when you are gone."

"I know, my heart, but I must do as Father asks. For now, at least." Lightly he planted a kiss on the crown of her head, and Kaoru blushed, feeling like an intruder witnessing their intimate displays of affection. "And you know I had to look out for Kenshin this time. I couldn't let my little brother go into his first battle alone."

"Be fair now, anata. That boy can best you." A dark frown pulled on his features, and the lady's light play at humor and reassurance died with a sigh.

"In training perhaps, but nothing prepares a man for taking a life."

His words struck home and Kaoru felt sorrow twist in her heart. Eyes dragging away, she searched the remaining men for a sign of Kenshin, desperate to see what his demeanor would show. It took little time, her eyes locking on to a small man pacing steadily towards the veranda, his head down, his bangs covering his face. It was a posture she was used to. He was trying to hide. Next to his brothers and father, it was an abrupt surprise to realize how scrawny he appeared. Kaoru had never really thought of Kenshin as weak or small, but with a family like the one he had, it was quite apparent he was the runt. All the more reason to fear his strength, when he could overpower them all.

Steps quick and light, hurried yet graceful, he mounted the stairs and was on the walk before Shinta could fully turn. From the other side, Kaoru took a step forward, but was once again detained by the woman beside her, the presence of the other forgotten and startling. Shinta's deeper voice snapped Kaoru's head back to watch, and Kenshin paused only briefly at the call of his name.

"…You did well, little brother. Get some rest. I will make your excuses to Father."

Hesitating, the fisted hands at his sides shook just barely before he nodded and continued on his way. As he rounded the corner, Shinta wrapped an arm around his wife and led her away, his head shaking sadly. About to protest her detainment, her heart crying out to follow and comfort, she blinked as the veiled woman appeared at the corner Kenshin had disappeared around, her hand waving for her to come. Startled, she glanced to her side and found that the woman was indeed gone. Shaking her head, she quickly skipped down the steps, her hands bunching up the layers of silk she found herself wearing, and raced up the other side to catch up.

As she passed his oldest brother she glanced distractedly upwards, marveling at the height difference, and was surprised to find his warm amber eyes looking back. He blinked briefly at her, a wrinkle of confusion forming between his brows, and with her attention distracted she stepped on the trailing ends of her court kimono and tripped. Quickly his hand snapped around her arm, steadying her, and the sudden contact warped something in the air surrounding them. Dazed, he let her go, his head shaking as if to rid himself of a buzzing in his ears. Unsure what to do, and worried about the way his lady wife was tilting her head, confused and either ignorant to what had happened, or unable to notice, Kaoru stumbled back.

"Wait." His voice was blatantly clearer, and Kaoru was surprised that she had not noticed the muffled way the noise here had sounded. "Who are you? I don't recognize you."

"Uh…" Trying to escape, trying to think of a convenient excuse to deter him, Kaoru stuttered and backed up further. "I… I'm just… I was… visiting… and… I thought…"

A suspicious, calculating look entered his eyes as whatever was handicapping him continued to muddle his thoughts. He was definitely a very intelligent man, and more observant than the others. "Who are you visiting?"

Thinking of her destination, and waving a hand vaguely in that direction, Kaoru spoke without thinking. "Just Kenshin… I mean…!" Eyes widening as she realized her slip, she knew it was too late when his own eyes widened in astonishment. There was no hope that he had missed her absence of a title, but the claim had caught him off guard. Too soon his face was curling in distrust.

"Your name, my lady, and who sent you. I will not have these games played on my little brother."

Unable to comprehend what he meant, Kaoru stood frozen. As she stared at him Misao's teasing words echoed in her mind and all the blood rushed to her face, her mouth snapping open in anger. "What the hell kind of woman to do you take me for?" Voice rising, she stepped forward angrily, his head pulling back. "I thought the brother he always speaks so highly of would have better manners than to accuse a lady of such… such… indecencies! And for your information, I'm here because I want to be here! Not because someone sent me! I'm here for Kenshin, because I… well I…" Stumbling over the words, her features twitched in irritation and she angrily avoided it by accusing. "Well, it's none of your business why! Really, questioning a lady over her motives! You should be ashamed of yourself!"

A hand touched her sleeve and she jerked to look at the veiled woman, her eyes tearing from the bemused expression on Shinta's face. "This man is not why we are here." Nodding shortly, Kaoru shot one last glare at the older brother, noticing confusion once again on his features as he searched for the origin of a sound he could not locate, and turned sharply away.

"If you are done interrogating me, I have someone to catch up to… before the idiot locks himself up somewhere and ignores the world."

Rounding the corner, she glanced one last time over her shoulder at the pair, and paused to find the veiled woman still there. One pale hand reached up to touch Shinta's forehead, and a vapid look washed over his features. A heartbeat later, he shook his head, his heavy eyelashes pulling forcefully apart, and he hesitated before smiling gently at his wife next to him. Unsure for only another moment longer, he followed her urging down the opposite veranda, their happy reunion continued as if it had never been interrupted.

Putting them out of her thoughts, Kaoru gathered up the bothersome ends of her kimono and hurried forward. Seconds later, the woman was back with her, directing her around the palace's labyrinthine walkways and to their destination. At any other place and time, she might have been out of breath, but here she was not. A vague whisper in her mind told her that it was because she was not really there, or rather, because her body was not really there. If this was a dream, or if it was something else, she didn't know, and it really didn't matter. An urgent, sure part of her consciousness told her that this was important and not to be taken lightly.

As they came closer to their destination Kaoru had to dodge out of the way of a servant hurrying quickly in the opposite direction. There was a worried look on the young man's face and as something crashed inside the pavilion to her left, she knew the reason why. Looking to the lady for confirmation, she watched a pale hand point to the closed tsumado and knew for certain what she had already guessed. This was where Kenshin had gone, and he was the one frightening everyone off.

Through the doors and inside the now quiet hallway, Kaoru walked hesitantly toward the wide open shoji. A peek showed another familiar sight, the room a mess and his form sitting dejectedly at the center. It felt surreal for a moment, looking at this young man's back, knowing that it was Kenshin, and yet seeing none of the traits she was used to. There were no wings; there were no horns; no claws; no talons; no red scales; no tail. He was simply a young man. A man who appeared to be at an age even younger than her. His hair was pulled up high, like she preferred to wear her own, and there was a slight tinge of color to the skin showing at the nape of his neck. The armor he had worn was now shed and tossed haphazardly around the room, showing the stains and tears in the kimono and hakama that had been worn underneath. The katana that had swung dangerously at his hip now rested carefully next to him on the floor.

For a few moments all she could do was stare; watch as he pressed his forehead into one upraised knee. He didn't move except to breathe, but it seemed to Kaoru that a light shiver trembled each inhaled breath.

A light clack from the outer tsumado alerted Kaoru that someone else had dared to come into the pavilion, and a touch of anxiety at being found out knotted her stomach. The veiled lady beside her sensed it as well, and as soft footsteps padded closer to their position, she pressed herself over the top of Kaoru's crouched form. From around the loose, flowing robe of the court kimono, Kaoru caught a glimpse of another lady; just a hand and the material of her dress. Without asking for permission, she stepped up into the room and approached the seated boy. Unlike Shinta, she did not notice Kaoru or her guide.

Her companion pulled back and Kaoru was able to fully view the scene unfolding within. The back of the lady was to her, so she could see none of her features, but she was small, and the hand she outstretched to place on Kenshin's head was delicate. Slowly his shoulders hunched inward, as if wishing to dislodge her touch, or disappear from sight, and a gentle sigh pushed from the lady's lips. Withdrawing her hand, she turned to a corner, unearthed a brush from the disorder, and came back to kneel behind him. Carefully she undid the tie holding his hair up, letting the crimson locks spill down his back and over his shoulders to trail on the floor. Gathering them up just as diligently, she pulled the bristles through the strands in a slow and rhythmic manner.

"I am glad that you have come back to me safely." Gently she spoke and her voice was soothing, not quite sweet, but very relaxing and kind. "It saddens me that you did not come to greet me before retiring. I have been anxious for your return."

Just barely his head lifted. "Forgive me, Mother. I… was not thinking."

"It is alright. Next time, please do not forget your manners."

The hand at his side clenched, then rose to cover his face, tangling with his bangs. "Of course." There was a tightness to his voice that made Kaoru frown in sympathy, sad that there would be a next time. Suddenly sitting completely straight he flung the arm back out to his side in a jerky, frustrated motion. "Shouldn't you be greeting Father?"

"Your father is taking council. I will be informed at the appropriate time." Reassuring him, she kept up the gentle stroke of the brush, her skilled hand not once snagging in his hair. "Many of the men were speaking loudly of your skills as they passed. It seems you have made quite the impression on the lord's army."

His level chin dropped slowly towards his chest. "Is that so?"

"This strength you have acquired must make you proud. Now your goal of protecting Shinta-sama is much closer to being attainable, is it not?"

"I… suppose." A touch of pain entered his voice.

The hand holding the brush stilled. "You must not show hesitation, otherwise you will be questioned why."

"I know." Now there was desperation.

"As your mother, Kenshin, I wish for your safety above all others. Perhaps it is selfish, but please do not put yourself needlessly in harm's way." A long breath pulled into her lungs. "Even if that means taking life."

The meanings hidden beneath their exchange finally became too much, and Kaoru watched in horror as Kenshin doubled over as if in extreme pain. Both hands came up to cradle his face, and only the harsh convulsing of his body hinted at the sobs that wished to break from his mouth. Setting the brush to the side, Lady Kinuko placed her hand comfortingly on the back of his head.

"My poor boy." Her voice was barely even a whisper. "If only these tears and your innocence could last. Instead I am left with the bitter task of encouraging the growth of callousness within you. Please forgive me…" Head bowing forward, her fingers clenched briefly in his hair. "but this is the last time you must allow yourself to cry."

A gasping breath fought desperately against his control, and he slumped onto his side, his arms curling around his head as if fending off an unseen attack. From the doorway Kaoru's heart ached, her own tears building harshly at the backs of her eyes and burning against her tender retinas. It hurt to not be able to comfort him, hurt to have to watch how thoroughly grieved he was over the lifestyle chosen for him. To take a life… Kaoru couldn't even imagine what that felt like.

For several minutes nothing happened except for the smooth progress of Kinuko's hand up and down his back. Eventually the ragged breathing upsetting the gentle scene became less, and the tense muscles in his back and shoulders loosened, his arms slipping free of his head to lay still on the floor. The expansion of his ribs became deep and even, but it was still long moments later before Lady Kinuko retrieved her hand to fold neatly into her lap. Clasping the doorframe, her eyebrows twitching and heart bruised, Kaoru felt so helpless. If this was truly a vision of an obscure event from the past, then this had already happened to her Kenshin, and nothing she could do would change that. He had suffered like this; had suffered and cried, trapped in a world that gave him no other choice but to bloody his hands and soul. She hated that his life had been so controlling, and as her sympathy grew so too did a fierce bud of determination to make his world happy.

"I have brought you to where you need to be, young one. The rest I will leave to your own power."

Twisting her head quickly, Kaoru looked over her shoulder for the veiled woman, blinking when she found herself alone. Slightly anxious, she released the door and quick searched the entire expanse of hallway in view, but she was indeed isolated within this place and time she found unfamiliar. What was she supposed to do? What power did she have?

"If you have come to see my son I am afraid he is in no condition to be accepting visitors." Gasping, Kaoru jerked her eyes back to Kenshin and his mother. "But I think you are well aware of that." Kaoru's eyes widened as Kinuko's lilac irises locked onto her figure in the doorway. They studied her, and in the moments that followed Kaoru was able to take in the lady's own features. Ink black lashes framed the pretty color of her eyes, intensifying the rarity of such a trait. The eyebrows above were just as black, but a second glance showed them to be higher than normal, and in fact drawn onto the pale powder covering her face. A deep red stain of gloss exaggerated the closed lips underneath her petite nose. Lastly the half-drawn up length of her hair perfectly outlined the delicate structure of her face, falling all the way down her back to puddle on the floor behind her. She seemed to be still very young, but despite her fragile looking body, she held herself as if she were in command of a calm type of strength.

"I find it strange that I do not recognize you, young lady. For surely I would remember anyone with such striking blue eyes."

"Ah, forgive me!" Shocked out of her silence, Kaoru stood clumsily to her feet and bowed low out of respect. "I am Kamiya Kaoru. I am very pleased to meet you, Kinuko-dono."

"Kamiya? I am afraid I do not recognize this name." A small frown formed on her brow. "Is this noble name new?"

"Uh… kind of." Kinuko looked uncertain, and Kaoru chewed on her lip. "Actually… I am not really a noble lady. I was… taken in by a noble, and have been treated like a lady, but… Kamiya is the name of my father, and he is but a samurai."

A smile curved her red lips, and Kinuko chided her lightly. "Do not belittle the title, young Kaoru-dono. The title of samurai contains much honor. The noble that has taken you in must see this as well, or he would not treat you like a lady."

"Oh no." Shaking her head quickly, Kaoru disagreed, her feet stepping closer to the shoji. "I doubt he would know how to treat me any other way, even if I were the daughter of a fisherman. He was… taught very good manners."

"I see." Kinuko's gaze became a touch intense, before her smile reappeared. "I wonder, though, if his manners have much to do with it."

Confused, Kaoru blinked. "What do you mean?"

"Just a passing thought. Tell me, Lady Kaoru, how is that you came to be here, in my son's rooms?"

"Uh…" Darting a quick glance at Kenshin's prone figure, still breathing deeply, still unaware of the world, she chewed her lip again, uncertain.

"Are you perhaps acquainted with my son somehow?"

Meeting her gaze hesitantly, Kaoru let her lip go and nodded slowly. "Y-yes. I… have been able to spend… a lot of time with Kenshin."

Impossibly, her high eyebrows rose higher. "Indeed. Enough time to so easily address him by name."

Kaoru colored prettily and dropped her eyes to the floor. "He said he didn't mind if I didn't use a title, as long as I wasn't being disrespectful. He still uses one when he addresses me, though."

"It is strange that I have heard nothing of you from him, when I have asked him many times if there is a young lady that has caught his eye." Slowly Kaoru lifted her gaze back to the lady, her chin still ducked into her chest. "Why do you think he would keep your existence a secret when he obviously respects you enough to address you by a title you do not hold?"

Cornered, Kaoru glanced at Kenshin again. What should I do? If I tell her the truth she would never believe me, but… this a vision… or perhaps just a dream? The veiled lady didn't tell me not to do or say anything. Frowning briefly, Kaoru shook her head in disagreement with herself. Who says any of this is real at all? Just because you want to believe it is doesn't mean that it's true. You've been hearing many stories from everyone, and this is more than likely just some illusion you have created in your mind from all of those tales of the past.

"That is because, Lady Kinuko, this Kenshin hasn't met me."

"This Kenshin?"

Slowly, Kaoru stepped up into the room and crossed the floor to kneel by Kenshin's head, so that the lady and herself were adjacent, but halfway facing one another. "He is much younger than the Kenshin I know, and in a way, he is much softer as well. Instead of crying, the Kenshin I know would become angry and withdrawn."

"That is not comforting to know, Kaoru-dono. That tells me only that his innocence truly has been lost after this moment."

"You believe me?" Surprised, Kaoru watched his mother smile sadly down at his sleeping form.

"Should I not?"

"Well…"

"There is nothing that suggests you are lying. From your straightforward manner to your strange dialect, your name that I do not recognize, the fact that I have never seen you before and yet you seem to know me and my son, but mostly, from the very beginning I had my suspicions because, young lady, that kimono you are wearing… that belongs to me."

Eyes darting down to look at herself, Kaoru realized for the first time that she was indeed wearing one of the court kimono that Kenshin had given to her to wear. One of the many that had belonged to his mother.

"If you are wearing it, that means only one thing. That my son has given my kimono to a girl that he cares deeply for… but also, that I am no longer around."

Sadness pulled on Kaoru's features when she met Kinuko's eyes again, and from the look she could tell that the lady had read everything that she needed to know. Opening her mouth to stutter something, anything to either deny or soothe the thought of the lady's own passing, Kaoru trailed off as Kinuko smoothly talked over her.

"Would you tell me about my son? From everything you have already said, I can guess that he is this noble who took you in and has cared for you."

Pausing, Kaoru swallowed, but decided it was probably best to let the conversation be steered in this direction. Nodding, she let her sight drift down to the boy laying on the floor between them. "Yes."

"And what is he like, this Kenshin that you know?"

Within the question Kaoru could detect the doubt she had expected. Not truly disbelieving her words, but wanting to compare the description she would give to what Kinuko knew for certain about her own child. Relieved with this, Kaoru's lips quirked into a smile. "Well… at first he was very stern and disapproving of everything. He didn't like the way I dressed, or the way I acted because it just wasn't proper. We fought a lot, and I always thought he was angry with me, which made me a bit disagreeable, but… I realize now that he was just uncomfortable and unsure. Underneath, he's really very caring, he wants to protect everyone, it… hurts him that he couldn't." Eyebrow twitching, Kaoru looked down into her lap, and tried to think of something else. "A lot of the time, he is the most intelligent person I have ever met… sometimes he's the dumbest, too." Laughing at an obscure thought, she looked up with that smile showing her white teeth. "He wishes he could be more like his brother. He is always speaking of how wise and kind Shinta-sama is, but… I think Kenshin has the potential to be better. He is a great master, and he takes care of his people the way a parent would take care of their children."

"This Kenshin you describe sounds very mature." Whether she was purposely ignoring all of the insinuations about the lifestyle Kaoru was painting, or hadn't caught onto the fact that there was no one else but Kenshin around Kaoru wasn't sure, but she seemed determined to speak only of him. "However, you haven't told me anything exactly personal about him."

"Ah…" Uncertain what she wanted, Kaoru blinked and fished about for something personal that she knew.

"You have told me what anyone simply living near him would see. Tell me something that only you know."

Abruptly laughing, Kaoru lifted a brow in disbelief. "That's kinda hard, since the servants pretty well know everything." Kinuko smiled and nodded in concession, but her eyes were encouraging. Clearing her throat, Kaoru fought back her amusement to make room for thought. "Well…" Struggling, sifting through all of her memories, weighing and dismissing many small quirks or different sides of his personality she had witnessed, she frowned. Something that only I know? Everyone else has been around him far longer than me. What could I possibly know that they don't by now? Misao's squeaky voice popped into her head, a vague memory from many weeks back. "I've never seen the master smile before." Amazed realization lit her face, and she thought of their flight a few days back. Suddenly eager, she leaned toward Lady Kinuko as their eyes locked together.

"The other day I was lucky enough to see him truly excited about something he wished to share. He's always so poised and in control of himself, even when he smiles or occasionally laughs. This time, though, his smile was more like that of a boy's. A very mischievous boy. And his laughter. It was so open and carefree." Bright sapphire eyes clenched shut and she giggled softly. "It was the first time I ever truly felt that he was happy. Completely, absolutely, happy. I felt so fortunate, since I was the one he chose to share that side of himself with. I could almost imagine him as a child, still innocent and untainted."

Lady Kinuko smiled, her hand reaching back out to rest on Kenshin's shoulder. "Even I have not seen that in many years. I have become so used to his emotionless mask, it is hard for me to recognize the young boy I used to hold in my lap."

Gaze drawn to the light contact between mother and son, Kaoru let her eyes drift to the features partially obscured by the fall of his bangs. "I hardly recognize this Kenshin, either." Without thinking, her fingers reached to brush back his hair, her touch a ghosting brush against his smooth skin. "It feels so… strange to see him like this."

"Is he really so different?"

Surprised, Kaoru jerked her head up, the image of her Kenshin popping into her head unwillingly. It was thoughtless of her to insinuate a change in appearance to his mother. Of course she would be curious to know, and Kaoru did not wish to explain for fear of upsetting her. "Well…" Glancing down, she gasped in abrupt shock, her hand recoiling from his hair. Kinuko followed her lead, her soft violet eyes staring at the figure now spread between them in place of her son.

"Is… is that really… my son?"

It was all the same as she remembered. The same features and details Kaoru woke up to see at breakfast every morning. Red scales covered his skin; large wings lay sprawled on top of one another across the floor; two golden horns sprouted from his hair; his ears were sharp and pointed; black claws and talons curved from his fingers and toes; and a long, thin tail with a fine tuft of furry hair curled around one leg. It was Kenshin, cursed to reflect all of the ugliness and rage in his heart, and yet… so beautiful and caring.

Shock dissipating, affection taking over, Kaoru smiled warmly down at the man still sleeping peacefully on the floor, her fingers returning to play with his hair. "Yes, my lady. This is the Kenshin that I know."

Kinuko's lilac eyes rose to examine the expression on the young girl's face, astonished by the vision before her, and yet more so by the sudden surfacing of adoration in the girl's voice. Not only was it strange for her to claim that she knew her son, and yet not the son that she knew, it was even stranger to realize that the normal and handsome appearance of her son at fifteen had not pulled out this reaction of fondness like the manifestation of this alarming man in her son's place.

"His appearance is a bit startling at first, but in a way it makes him even more endearing. I'm constantly catching him scratching at these horns. He says they itch more than anything." Lightly her nails scrapped his scalp. "And he has this funny line of hair down his spine, and his tail has a mind of its own, I swear. His wings are actually usable, and he's even taken me flying. It's the most wonderful experience. Oh, and his eyes are closed, but they kind of look like a cat's, with vertical pupils, and they're still warm and golden. When he laughs, though, the pupils widen and he looks so very gentle and sweet." Voice trailing off, her eyes landed on one curled hand, the dark claws shiny and dangerous. Smile fading, she sighed.

"He has a hard time holding things without breaking them, though." Mind reversing to backtrack over every disadvantage, Kaoru became sober. "His clothing had to be modified so he could wear a kimono because of his wings, and he can't wear shoes at all because of his feet. His scales snag the silk material. They make it hard for any wounds to heal. He can't sleep on his back, and I know he doesn't sleep laying down anymore at all. He hides behind his hair."

Feeling sympathy for the sadness now infecting the young girl, Kinuko sighed as well. "My son has done that since the age of seven. Now, I suppose, he simply has more to hide."

Kaoru's lip twisted bitterly. "He thinks he is ugly. I know because he never looks in a mirror. It makes me sad, and yet angry at the same time. I want him to be happy… but I don't know if that's possible when he cannot be happy with himself. The way he looks does not bother me, because it is the only way I know to see him. It bothers him, though. It makes him unhappy. I wish…" Letting the thought drift, her eyes fell to her lap. He would be happier if he were himself again, and yet, according to Tomoe the curse could not be broken unless he was happy first. It seemed like such an impossibility. How was she supposed to do this by herself?

"It has taken me awhile, Kaoru-chan, but I can see my son in this man you have shown to me. There are many differences, many more cares furrowing his brow, but… at the heart, he is still the same boy I used to know." Kaoru looked up, and Kinuko smiled softly. "You said this is the only way you know to see him. I would like to show you what I see when I look at my boy." Carefully her hand touched the top of Kaoru's own hand still resting on Kenshin's skull. A bright, rapidly flashing image popped into her mind, and her breath froze as she blinked in confusion. As her mind cleared she found herself watching as Kinuko bent gracefully forward and scooped up a child into her lap.

Incredulous, Kaoru stared incomprehensively at the pair and wondered at the strange turn her dream, or whatever it was, had taken. In place of the teenager, in place of the dragon-formed man, there was now a child of perhaps four or five. Still sleeping, he let his mother curl his limbs comfortably into her lap as her arms wrapped protectively around him. Limply his head rolled to lean against her collarbone, his bright red hair an unruly mess, his features a picture of trust, adorable and sweet in slumber. No cares troubled him in sleep. He was total innocence.

"This is who my son truly is, no matter what his age or appearance. If you can help him remember this, you will have no problem making him happy." Lifting her smiling adoration up towards Kaoru, Kinuko's lilac eyes were glowing with maternal love. "I do not think you should fret, Kaoru-chan. After all, you have already brought out a part of this boy."

"But…" Soft and breathless, she stared, her heart suddenly aching with envy. "How can you be so sure that…?" Stopping herself in that frantic fear of upsetting a sleeping child, she caught her breath as long red lashes fluttered, his little mouth pulling wide in a yawn.

"Mommy?" Rubbing at his eyes, he directed their sleep heavy gaze upwards at his mother. "Who you talking to?"

Smiling down at him, Kinuko brushed back his hair. "Why don't you see for yourself, baby." Adjusting him so that he was sitting up in her lap facing Kaoru, he parted his lashes a bit further to take in Kaoru's seated form. A couple lazy blinks, and his eyes opened completely, taking Kaoru by complete surprise as she gazed into a pair of violet eyes a shade darker than his mother's. As her face relaxed into amazement, his pulled into a boyish grin. "Do you recognize the lady, Kenshin?" Nodding enthusiastically, he leaned back and pressed the crown of his head into his mother's sternum so that he was looking up at her. "You do?" Teasing, she tickled his stomach.

"Uh-huh." Giggling and squirming, he tried to catch her wiggling fingers.

Letting up, Kinuko wrapped him in a hug, her nose nestling into his soft hair. "Can you tell me her name, sweetheart?"

Amethyst eyes looked straight across the short distance into Kaoru's own blue, his voice sure and even. "Kaoru-dono."

"That's right, sweetie." Praising him, Kinuko let her grip loosen. "And what do you think of Kaoru-dono? Is she nice?"

"Yep. Nice like Mommy, but…" Pursing his little lips, he seemed undecided for a moment. "different, too."

"Oh? How?"

Shrugging, he grabbed at a stray hair that fell over Kinuko's shoulder, looking a bit bashful. "I don't know."

Laughing gently, Kinuko encouraged his hand away from her hair. "Alright, silly boy. Do you like having her around?"

"Uh-huh." Enthusiastic once again, he grinned and pushed himself up out of his mother's lap to hop the short distance into Kaoru's. Caught off guard, Kaoru steadied him, her eyes wide as his little arms wrapped around her neck tightly. "I want Kaoru-dono to stay with me forever." Something sharp trembled in Kaoru's chest, and her eyes closed, her breath hitching at his next innocently asked question. "You will, won't you?"

Circling her arms around him to return the hug, allowing him room to squirm and climb fully into her lap, she squeezed carefully. "For as long as I can." Seemingly content with the answer, her rested his chin on her shoulder and began playing with the collar of her kimono. Little fingers slipping from silk to her neck, she felt his grip pull at the metal chain of her necklace, the glass petal slipping against her skin underneath her clothing.

"Do you like the necklace I made you?"

With her eyes closed and his voice a mere whisper, she frowned as the childishness of moments before left and his tone sounded more like the adult she knew. Swallowing, but unwilling to open her eyes and break whatever spell she was under, she nodded. "Yes. You know I do, Kenshin."

"I am glad you have worn it all this time. It feels like… you have kept a part of me with you." The hand tugging at the chain released it to catch and flop onto the outside of her kimono where it was in sight. It made her smile, because it only solidified her theory that he liked it in sight, where he could see it clearly. "I like being with you, Kaoru-dono."

"I like being with you, too."

Slowly allowing her eyes to open once more, she blinked down at the boy still in her arms. Sitting sideways in her lap now, his back braced against one of her arms, he was playing intently with the necklace, his tiny fingers careful of the fragile bauble hanging from its chain. Upon noticing that she was looking at him again, his attention shifted to her. Smiling bashfully, he blushed and turned his face into her kimono, his hands dropping from her necklace to bury into the silk. It was cute, innocent, and very sweet, and she giggled airily at the actions that seemed so out of character for the man she knew.

"It seems my son is very happy with you, Kaoru-chan." Startled, Kaoru jerked her gaze up to the woman she had almost forgotten was in the room. Blushing, she bit her lip.

"Do you think so?"

"Yes. Now you just need to make sure he realizes that. You need to let the feeling grow."

Blush darkening, Kaoru opened her mouth to reply when a sharp knock behind her made her jump.

"My lady, the master is asking for you."

Kinuko looked over Kaoru's shoulder and made a reply, but Kaoru was focused on the voice of the servant and missed what was said. Turning her head quickly to see the owner, she slumped in disappointment when she found no one in the doorway. That voice… had definitely belonged to Misao.

"It looks as if our time is up, Kaoru-chan. It was a pleasure to meet you, and a joy to know that my son will not always be alone." Standing gracefully to her feet, she patted a hand on top of Kenshin's small head and smiled once more at Kaoru.

"Wait." Catching a hand in the folds of her kimono, Kaoru stopped her. "May I ask you a personal question?"

"You may ask me anything, Kaoru-chan."

"Do you love your husband?" All of the pieces of information that had been gathered in her mind were a whirling contradiction, and perhaps it was simply nosiness that had birthed the question, but Kaoru wanted to know. If she didn't ask now, she would never have the chance, even if it wasn't real.

The smile on Kinuko's face became a bit smaller, a bit sadder. "Truthfully, my dear girl… I do." Frown lines began to appear all over Kaoru's face, and Kinuko touched her shoulder to silence her protests. "Do not try to understand why, young lady. You will never see him the way I do, just as no one will ever see Kenshin the way you see him; scales, claws, and all. A man will show a side of himself to a woman that no one else has the privilege of seeing, but only when that woman is special to him. You will understand one day." Her smile grew once more. "Soon, I think. Goodbye, Kaoru-chan. I do not believe we will ever meet again."

Lady Kinuko disappeared out the open shoji and down the hall, leaving Kaoru alone in the room with Kenshin. Turning her attention back to the boy, she started at finding him gone, and in his place the Kenshin she knew. Sprawled on the floor, his wings spread wide, his head pillowed in her lap, and he smiled while he dreamed.

X

A/N: Holy shit! I'm done! Finally! Thank you God! Alright. So this chapter was way, way long, and perhaps it had a lot to do with why it took me forever to get this done, but, ahem, we all know that it is not the main culprit. My weakness… I have an obsessive nature. Once I start in on a story it consumes my world and I just have to know how it ends. Downside to writing… I know how it ends. Downside to reading… I don't. So, it took some badgering from all sides just to get me back into my story. It's actually a good thing I have people I know reading this story, or it might have gotten thrown onto the back burner for longer than I wanted. Anywho… everyone say thanks to my g-ma and my coworker…lol.

Ok, so not really exciting, but, needed for some things. This chapter is a building into the next few, as a lot of you could probably guess. I wanted to have the conversation with Misao at the beginning, but I've been planning this whole crazy interaction with Kenshin's mom for awhile. If you got confused about whether it was a dream or a vision, don't be alarmed… you're supposed to be confused. If you didn't like the crazy twist the dream took, I'm sorry… but another necessity. You'll see later, and hopefully it will make sense. I'm going to stop, because I don't like giving stuff away, and since my brain is nearly fried, it is a high probability.

So anyway, just tell me what you think, oh, and thanks again to sirenmergirl for giving me all this wonderful trivia about the era that Kenshin is loosely from. I use the term loosely very firmly, if that makes sense, because I'm sure I've stretched this whole thing to the max, and pretty much created my own culture. You are awesome! Keeping me in line is not easy! Alright, next chapter… new hairdos, squirmy feelings, and used chopsticks. Buh-bye. REVIEW!