Title: A Faded Memory

Author: Devlyne (Originally published as BelleAngeli)

Published: 07-20-03 (Re-Post 9/18/2015)

Disclaimer: I do not own Labyrinth, Jareth or Sarah. Nor do I in any way resemble Jim Henson, The Jim Henson Company, Henson Creature Shop or Disney.

A/N: Revised 9/18/2015. For those that never read the original version of this, I'm sorry to tell you that I don't have a copy. I am writing over it as we speak. To give you an idea of the revision process, when this chapter was originally posted, it had 1290 words. The revision is almost 3k. I really hope the extra words made it worth reading. Also, in case you're wondering, you can tell the revised chapters from the old based on this nifty little header. The old chapters didn't have this.

Chapter 6: Time to Dwell in Dreams

Laughter was the response that Sarah got to her declaration. For the space of a few moments, Jareth had stood before her with a dumbfounded expression on his face. His eyes taking in the way that Sarah held that pill bottle aloft like some hard won trophy and the triumph in her eyes. It was so absurd that he could not help the laughter which escaped his lips. Later, when Jareth had time to reflect on it, he might remember the hurt look in her eyes but for now he did not see it.

One gloved hand lifted to press to Jareth's eyes as he tried to control the tears which followed his laugh. Did she not understand? No, how could Sarah understand completely. He had not yet made her see and that was the problem. She didn't see. For years, Sarah had given in to the will of others which told her this would work. If she took those pills, her soul would be back in its cage and nothing bad could happen to her there.

Well, that situation would need fixed immediately. "No, Sarah. The pills cannot make me go away." His hands folded before him as he regarded her. "I was always watching you from a distance. You can make me go away. You have always had the power to make me go away." Jareth was calm as he revealed to her this weakness. "But you need to face reality, Sarah and the reality is that you don't want me to leave."

He seated himself on the edge of the bed and made a study of arranging his coat tails and shirt. Sarah was faltering before him. If he waited just a few moments more, her resolve would crumble and then they could begin to make headway. All Jareth had to do was remain patient. He tugged on his glove cuffs to adjust them and dusted off his pants while she pulled herself together. She was gathering her courage and he would give her time to screw her courage to the sticking place, as it were. If only Sarah had looked to that courage when this had begun, it would have made this much easier.

And where had that spark of courage been last night? He already knew the answer to that question; locked away inside her. Last night Jareth had watched her through the mirror as she had taken those pills one by one. He had counted more than a dozen of those little white prisons passing her lips. There had been no feeling nor was there an outward show of any emotion to betray that Sarah had known what she doing. He felt guilt in his part of having watched her fall so far and doing nothing to stop it. Jareth had wanted her to fall.

"They have to." Sarah sounded broken as she whispered those words to him. "If they don't, it means I'm crazy. I can't be crazy. I'm not."

There was a pain in Jareth's chest in the region of his heart at those words. He had watched her take those pills and seen the way the emotions had drained from her face. A glance at the bottle had told him that Sarah had taken more than she should have. One to two, the directions said, but not eleven or twelve. He thought he'd understood her intentions but this morning had changed that view. Sarah did not want to die but neither was she living.

Whatever Jareth thought Sarah had intended, she only remembered it as a dream now. He could work with that. She did not remember that he had been the one to stay her hand before she'd taken another pill. And whatever thoughts had led Sarah to that bring to begin with appeared forgotten for the moment. Jareth had seen her leave with that man and return distraught without him. He had heard the message left on her machine. The man meant to take her away and when Sarah had not gone this Christopher had abandoned her.

A smile curled Jareth's lips upward. "I could make him run through the Labyrinth." His head canted just enough to give him a better view of Sarah's face. She looked confused at his words. "Never mind." He gave a wave of one gloved hand to dismiss that line of thought.

And though Sarah might wonder where that had come from, Jareth now considered seeking the man out. A run through the Labyrinth would help this Christopher learn a bit of appreciation. Well, it would if Jareth had any intention of letting him win. It would be a diverting game and so was set aside as too diverting. He needed to focus his attention on Sarah and her current needs.

"You're not, you know." He murmured. There, that was more in line with the conversation they had been having. It was a better answer than suggesting torture of her boyfriend. "You're not crazy. You're confused. They've made you confused. Let me help you, please."

If Sarah had not already been sitting, Jareth was certain that she would have sat down hard on any surface. It took him a moment to realize that it was not him reaffirming her sanity which had caused it. He'd said please. Blue eyes rolled upward in their sockets a moment and Jareth's head shook at her. Did she think that he had no manners at all? Yes, thank you very much, the Goblin King had said please. He berated her mentally but at least had the good graces to not speak again. No, let her gather her thoughts.

Sarah had gone through a range of emotions during this span of conversation. One moment she had been trying to be indignant and the next close to breaking down as he'd spoken his piece. Of course the pill would make him go away, that was what the pills were for. And no he was not watching her from a distance because that would mean Jareth had been stalking her all this time. And yes, she was crazy, thank you very much. No, wait, she wasn't crazy. Her mind twisted and turned over his words and her own trying to answer him. He deserved an answer.

"How is this possible?" If he was real, if Jareth existed, how could it be? "Are you an alien or is it a parallel universe?" These words whispered because if anyone overheard her, they would think she was mad. "And if you tell me that it's magic, that's the end of the conversation. I want to know how, I want to understand."

There was a grunt of frustration from the man. Jareth had fixed her with a hard gaze as he searched for the words to explain. Magic was the answer he had been about to give but it was the only answer he knew. How best to explain that to Sarah? One gloved hand lifted a moment to twist and turn before his face before he stripped the glove away. His bare hand held up between them before he reached out to grasp her arm in his fingers.

"You can feel me touching you. I am warm and alive. You can feel the beat of my heart." His thumb pressed in to her arm more at those words. Yes, she could feel the beat of his heart. "That is how. I just am. I can't explain it better than that. Underground exists and I can get to it the same way you walk through a door and get to the hallway."

Her eyes drifted closed and Sarah took a moment to compose herself. She could smell dusty stone, open air and horses which was odd considering she'd never seen him ride one. Did a magical king need a horse? He'd always seemed to be popping in and out wherever he pleased the last time they'd met. It was beginning to sink in that their last meeting might have been less fantasy and more reality. That meant he had kidnapped her brother, at her request, and there was a Labyrinth. The implications left her reeling.

It was far too easy to throw caution to the wind and tell Jareth that she wanted him to take her away. She was miserable here and he was offering her dreams again. Chris had told her not to call back if the answer was no and Sarah wasn't certain that she felt anything at his leaving. She felt something about the demise of their relationship, yes, but at his leaving, no. He had made it clear in that message that he wasn't coming back to her. It would be so easy to just leave with Jareth.

Despite the ease with which Sarah's mind accepted that going with Jareth was a good idea, she did not say so. There were other considerations to make about the idea. Jareth did not love her but then if he took care of her, did that matter? Was Sarah even certain that Jareth did not love her? He'd come, after all, when she most needed someone. It was Jareth's voice that she had heard the night before.

The ugliness of self-doubt chose that moment to rear its head and Sarah shook her head to clear it. No. Jareth was not real. Underground was not real. There was no castle and no labyrinth. She had not escaped the Goblin King or won his game and Toby was not kidnapped. None of it had ever happened. It was a dream that she had made up to pass the time while Carin and her father were out.

A low moan of despair escaped Sarah's lips and she hunched her shoulders while cupping her face in her hands. Jareth started forward to grasp at her wrists but drew back at the last minute. This was something Sarah needed to work through on her own and without influence. For a time, they sat together while Sarah sorted through her thoughts and feelings. What she felt toward him was too real but the images of Underground were too cartoon-like to believe.

"I don't know if I can go with you, Jareth." Sarah whispered. "I don't know if I can bring myself to believe it's real." Her head lifted from her hands so that she could see his face as she said it. Would he be angry at this admission? "I want to."

Her hands fell to her knees and grasped hold of them. If this went too far, she would need to make an appointment with her doctor. It was the only way she would be able to keep rooted in this world after today. There would have to be more pills and therapy sessions. Sarah realized now that she was afraid. If Jareth was only a madman and could not deliver what he promised, what would she do?

The prickling, burning sensation of tears caused Sarah to lift one hand to her eyes. If she went back to the doctor, he would give her more pills to combat the hallucinations. They would be stronger and might interfere more and then she would never be rid of them. Crazy; it made her feel crazy when all she wanted was to feel normal. Jareth was offering her his twisted version of normal.

For his part, Jareth sat by watching the play of emotions across her face. He considered what options there were to convince her and weighed each against the other. It would be easy to trick Sarah and take her back in to the Labyrinth. He could do that and still live with himself for the most part. What good would that do? She was already at the point of breaking and one more shove would shatter her. He would not be that shove.

Not for the first time that night, Jareth wondered how someone who had been so full of life could have fallen so low. This world was beautiful and full of many ingenious inventions, but it was a killer of dreams. That was the answer he gave himself; the world had killed her dreams. He shifted from the edge of the bed to kneel before Sarah and take both of her hands in his. His chin rested atop her bowed head as he sat in silence with her.

What words could he give Sarah to assure her that she was wrong? There was a time when he would have acted but the last time those actions had proven wrong. This game no longer seemed so thrilling as it had an hour ago. His instinct was to steal Sarah away and hide her so that the world could not do more damage. It would do no good, of course, because she would not be strong afterward.

In time, Jareth was certain that Sarah would grow to love him and be secure in his company and embrace. What would happen, though, should he have cause to have to leave her? Death was no great obstacle but it required time to recover from. And if, in that time, she had to step back out and face the world, it would only break her again. No, the Sarah who sat before him now would not be able to face that on her own.

Dreams die hard even for the Goblin King. He wished that he had the old Sarah back. Right now he would even be happy with her defiance and declarations about the unfairness of the world. It was far better than this pitiable creature who sat before him. He struggled to find the words to answer and guide her. Jareth, who had rarely struggled at anything, struggled at this.

"Let me help you, Sarah, please." There was such desperation in his voice as he whispered those words to her. His hands grasped harder at hers and cheek turned to brush her hair.

Sarah leaned back at the tone she heard in that voice, freeing herself of his head on hers. She lifted dark eyes to gaze in to blue and sat there considering the man before her. Tears ran from dark eyes and trailed along her cheeks, dripping atop his uncovered hand. He was asking her to trust him. Could Sarah do that?

"Okay." She whispered to him. "Help me, Jareth, please."