Note: I'm supposed to post this next Wednesday but since I rewrote lots of parts, added a new daily activity for the boys, and went on a different path, you'll just get it as it comes :)
No proofreading either for this one, I want to write more than I want to track typos, sorry! I'm on the next chapter already.

DAY ELEVEN – 4 contestants / 1 to be eliminated (part 2)

Danny was starting to worry. Mello was not in his apartments. The man checked the kitchen, the main room, he even investigated the pool and the surroundings of the mansion, but he couldn't find him. Deciding to call him as a last resort, with the risk of making him angry, he speed dialled the singer's number.
Unfortunately, following the sound of Mello's ringtone only led Danny back to Mello's bedroom. The blond was gone, and without his phone, great.

It was unusual for Mello to do so, though, he would rather just put it on plane mode or simply shut it off than leave it behind, and suddenly Danny knew where to find him. His boss couldn't be far if he had deemed acceptable not to take his phone with him, and Danny hadn't checked upstairs.

He didn't need to check all the rooms, there was only one where Mello could be. That was a really stupid move, and Danny would have to scold Mello once again because the production wouldn't be happy. Matt, and Matt, and again Matt. The whole show was a display of Mello's obvious preference and the producers were as upset as can be. The audiences rates were good, but they were persuaded that they could do better, hence the choice with exes, family members, and all the possible drama they could bring in.

They hadn't liked Lou being thrown out as soon as they had brought him back, and were quite unhappy with the mistake they had made to accept from Mello that all eliminations were broadcast live.
Danny was aware that Lou was the choice of the production as a winner, and his age was probably a very well known fact as they had hired him for the show, because should it be discovered, the audiences rates would have gone through the roof, and if it had happened after the show, it was very good post advertising for reunion shows and such.
Danny had been pretty relieved that Lou had been eliminated so quickly, the production didn't care if they ruined Mello's career, but he did. Not for his job, he would find something else, but Mello didn't deserve to go down in flames like that.

He had been extremely surprised when Mello had told him about his syndrome. He had always known that something was different with Mello, but he had always put that on account of a difficult childhood and all the traumas Mello was still not rid off since he had never had a nurturing environment to grow up in. Even with Mello as an adult, Danny always felt like dealing with a rebel teenager. There was nothing rational in the behaviour of the singer, who paradoxically had a very rational mind, making him a very clever tornado that was hard to conceal.
He had listened to Mello without interrupting, barely asking a question here and there to understand better, and almost burst in tears when Mello had finally looked at him with eyes filled with fear. He had simply pulled the kid in his arms and hugged him, there was nothing else he could do or say.

Danny had always wondered what he really was for Mello. Sometimes he felt like being just here to swipe his ass, other times he liked to think that Mello considered him as a friend, someone whom he could rely on for more than just putting up with his shit, but he had never been sure. Mello was loyal, generous, this, he could never deny, but the relationship they had was confusing, and the feeling of being a mere crutch to Mello's broken life was not a pleasant one.
So with the proof that Mello trusted him completely, and was afraid to lose him over this revelation... What could Danny think other than "Thank God, this kid just needed to accept himself."

And to be honest, although he wasn't surprised with what Mello had said just before that, about choosing Matt, because Mello was probably the only one unaware that he was not being subtle about it at all, he was a lot more shocked that Mello had told Matt about his autism. And told him first.
Not surprised either that Matt had taken it well, Danny didn't doubt the guy as much as he used to in the beginning of the show, although he still kept some reservations, but damn, Mello obviously wanted Matt for more than a night, the tall man would go as far as saying that his boss was totally infatuated with the redhead, and the other way around was true as well, and still, he had told Matt although he could lose him over that.

And from that, Mello had been different.
The change was as little subtle as Mello's attraction to Matt: the blond was smiling a lot more, a lot less sarcasm passed his lips, he was more calm (Danny had expected the worst when Mello had to face Joshua's father, but where the old Mello would have jumped at the man's throat, the new Mello just brushed it.)
The uncontrollable fire had been concealed inside barriers, and Danny knew that although Mello was feeling a lot lighter now that his right hand man knew and accepted his autism, the real origin of this was Matt.
Danny wasn't so sure how it was possible that someone like Matt, who had been abused, could find solace in someone as unpredictable and obviously violent as Mello, while Mello would decide to trust completely someone who hadn't ceased to expose the singer's flaws and inconsistencies. It was like asking the lamb to trust the wolf. Unbelievable.
That's why Danny kept some reserve concerning the situation, better be safe than sorry.

The door of the bedroom Matt occupied was closed. Danny knocked, but no one replied. He was suddenly worried that they had left together, so he he opened regardless of permission.
Of course, Mello was there. Danny was relieved but at the same time not happy that Mello had indeed spent the night in Matt's room. He was perfectly aware that the contestants bedrooms were equipped with cameras. Not that the production would show the whole footage on TV because if they had had sex, it wasn't suited for the audience time, but still, it would end as a montage and probably a big mess as well.

"Mello." Danny said, not even caring to whisper. The blond didn't move, still sleeping soundly, but Matt woke up, throwing a sleepy glance through his bangs as he was lying on Mello's chest, the singer's arms around him.
"I'll wake him up." Matt simply said, peeling his cheek from Mello's torso, only to find himself smooched against it, Mello pulling him back, his arms encircling the redhead firmly as a smile appeared on his lips, his eyes still shut.
"Don't you dare move Mattie, not before I take care of your morning wood." he muttered.
"Mello, Danny's here." Matt said, repressing a laugh.
"Unless he wants to see what he can't unsee, he'd better be gone in three seconds." Mello chuckled, opening an eye and turning his head to the side to look at Danny.
The latter rolled his eyes and closed the door.

"So, what do we have here?" Mello said, his hand reaching for the hard on he had noticed right away when he woke up. Grabbing it, he began to pull slightly on Matt's cock, all the while sitting in the bed, gesturing Matt to follow.
Matt found himself on his knees, his crotch right in Mello's face, to the latter's delight.
In a second, Mello had his tongue on Matt's cock, his bandaged hand pushing against the redhead's butt to have him close enough to take him into his mouth.
Matt moaned, not expecting Mello to suck him.
Mello looked up though the blond strands falling in his eyes, loving the sight of Matt gazing at him, his eyes half lidded, obviously enjoying what Mello was doing very much.
"Nnh... Fuck, Mello..." Matt exhaled, his hands finding Mello's hair, refraining to fist the locks and push himself further in his mouth.

Mello's only valid hand left Matt's butt, and the redhead watched every move of the blond ad he reached for his own member, stroking himself in rhythm with his sucking.
The sight of this beautiful cock getting hard was enough for Matt to release in Mello's mouth.
"Best breakfast ever." the blond winked at Matt, licking his lips.
Matt sat down on Mello's legs, his hand replacing Mello's on his erection. He pushed him back on the bed, and started to stroke his cock, lips crashing together.
Matt loved Mello's heavy breathing in the kiss, the moans vibrating against his own lips, and he deepened the wet exchange even more, making sure to pay attention to Mello's reactions, guiding his hand for what he liked best.
A particularly rough twist of his wrist elicited a rush of blood in the singer's cock, making it jolt in Matt's hand.
Matt broke the kiss when he felt that Mello was close, watching his face as he rode his orgasm.

He wanted to say something, but everything in his mind sounded cheesy. He thought that Mello was beautiful, he wanted to say he loved him, and never wanted to be away from him, but instead, he just stared at him in the eyes, unable to utter a word. It wasn't just the aftermath of the orgasm and the endorphins released with it that made him feel like that, Matt was amazed that he had found so much when he had come here for nothing except for a stupid dare.
"I think I won my dare." he chuckled, but Mello's face told him he had just said the most stupid thing he could have said.
"What do you mean?" the tone was suddenly extremely cold.
"Nevermind, it was stupid to say that, I didn't mean it like tha-"
Mello cut him, sitting back in the bed, "Then what did you mean?"
The blond was panicking, and Matt could see the way fear was creeping in those clear eyes, along with a latent anger that made Mello all the more frightening, because he was in total control and was ready to strike anytime if Matt fucked up.
"Hey... Mello, calm down, it's okay, relax..." Suddenly Matt remembered a part of the book. Fuck, he had to do something quick before it all went down, things could go downhill pretty fast with Mello, "It was a stupid thing to say because it obviously makes you feel like I was still thinking of winning that dare, but that's not what I meant, it was a joke, I just thought about that right now, and I was stupid enough to say it knowing that you would worry."
Explaining things clearly, not leaving details out, Matt tried to apply the advice he had read in the book. Mello still looked hurt and expecting more though, so it wasn't working.
Matt searched for something more to say and was realising how hard things could get with a few badly chosen words. Mello was attached to details and used to search for meaning in everything, and as far as Matt knew from the book about Asperger's syndrome, second degree could be lost with autists. Which was paradoxical considering Mello's skills with sarcasm, but still, Matt was walking on the border of a cliff right now and Mello was ready to push him down and jump afterwards, and he had to deal with that situation quick.

The blond was scrutinizing his face and Matt was at loss for what to say.
"I'm sorry, I promise it was just a stupid comment, I don't care for the dare-"
"What kind of dare was it, actually? That you'd get to win the show? Or just make me suck your dick?"
"No, Mello, stop it, it's not that at all..."
"I suppose I can't go back in time if it's the latter, but if you think you're totally safe now, remember that there are still three eliminations coming."
The blond jumped off the bed, picked up his pants on the floor, and left the room, slamming the door behind him.
Matt sat on the bed, dumbfounded. What had just happened, for fuck's sake? How could he have fucked up so bad with just a stupid joke?
He ran to the railing to catch up with Mello, but Danny, who was right behind Mello, made a sign to stop right where the redhead was.

Danny might not know how to deal with Mello's crisis, and had never really known, and knowing that it was due to autism didn't really help right now, but at least, he knew his reactions, and right now, Matt seemingly the origin of Mello's anger, it was best for the redhead to stay away until Danny had tried to make the singer explain what happened. His version would tell him a lot more than Matt's, although he'd talk to the latter later.

Running after Mello, Danny followed him to his apartments, almost receiving the door in his face as Mello slammed it behind himself.
"I can't fucking believe I was so stupid!"
"What happened?" Danny stood face to Mello, who sat on his bed.
"I should have known it was too good to be true!"
"Mello, if you don't tell me what happened, I can't help you."
"I don't need help, I just need to stop falling in his traps! He's been having me dancing in his palm right from the beginning, and I didn't fucking see it!"
Danny knew that he wouldn't get anything from Mello in that state, the singer was totally incoherent and in his own world, turning round and round with his speech. He left the room to talk to Matt.
"Stay here," he said to Mello before closing the door, "I'll be right back, okay?"
Mello didn't reply, he just gave him an angry look.

Danny climbed the stairs, finding Matt sitting on the bed, his nose in a book.
"What happened?" the man asked to the redhead.
"I said something stupid as a joke, and he took it literally, and I have no clue how to explain to him that I didn't mean it the way he understood it."
"What did you say?"
In other circumstances, Matt would have dismissed the question, but now, Danny knew about Mello's autism, and Matt really needed to sort this out otherwise he would lose Mello.
"Mello knows I was here on a dare, I told him the first day, and I was stupid enough to bring it up as a joke."
Seeing as it still wasn't clear to Danny, Matt added: "I said I had finally won my dare. It was stupid, and it was just a joke, nothing more, I would have never thought he'd think I was still trying to win my dare for real... If anything, I have won just by being here the first day, it was a dare about me managing to be on the show. But no matter how much I explained, Mello's persuaded that I played him all along, and to be honest, I have no clue how to make him understand I really love him, and I don't even know how he can trust me one day and doubt me like that all of a sudden..."
"I see..." Danny simply said, ticking on something the redhead had said, "I'll fix that."
Matt looked at him puzzled. How would Danny fix such a fuck up?

The tall man left and went back to Mello's apartments.
"Mello, remember when I said Matt was probably a masochist?"
"What?" the blond said, his head shooting up, uncaring that Danny saw that he was crying. Danny acted as if he hadn't noticed, not wanting to push Mello further with negative thoughts.
"His bet, it was just about him being on the show. He won his dare the first day, but he stayed nonetheless no matter how shitty your behaviour was, so I was right, he's a masochist. Or maybe he loves you, at least that's what he said, and believe me, as little as I want to admit it, this guy was sincere and it's obvious."
"Like hell, he just stayed for the money."
"Can you stop being irrational now? He didn't take the money you offered, remember?"
"Fame?"
"Yeah, that's totally his type. Try again."
Mello looked at Danny with a weird look. "What are you doing exactly?" he asked his right hand man.
"Stopping you from pushing him away with an irrational reaction because you're scared shitless to lose him and you're overanalysing what he said. He's got the book, but I have the internet, you know?" Danny smiled.

Mello stood up, then sat back again. He knew that Danny was probably right, but a part of him was still gnawing at his confidence, telling him with a little voice that Matt was a contestant like the others, he had just been more subtle and clever in his approach.
The struggle in his mind drove him crazy. He wanted to see the joke for what it was, but then, why would have Matt said that now of all moments if he didn't mean it, like a small cry of victory?

"Mello, the more you care, the more you search for flaws and little details to support your theory that people are all rotten and using you, but for one bad person you effectively avoid, there is one that is good for you that you will push away regardless. You're just lucky that some of those good people stuck around no matter what, that should tell you enough about how much they care for you, no matter how much you doubt them. Or better said, how much you doubt your ability to keep them around. You did that with me, you did that with the band, and now you're doing it with Matt. Most people will just leave you alone and think you're a jerk, and you're pretty close to that state of things with the band, I overheard what Tommy told you yesterday... but I'm still here, and I like to think that you care for me too-"
"Are we about to talk man-love or what?" Mello snickered, but Danny went on, he knew that he was making the singer uncomfortable but things had to be said.
"I never told you that, but I never failed you not just because you've always provided me a job and support when I needed it, but because I think that you're an amazing kid – yeah, I know, you're twenty-six, you're not a kid anymore in your own eyes but let me doubt that – and that being said, other people see that too in you, the band and Matt included, but you're going to lose it all if you search for the tiniest negative meaning in everything people say. People say a lot of things Mello, don't take everything to heart, let actions speak sometimes."

Mello stayed silent. Danny had never told him anything like that, they never had deep conversations and hearing that now made him want to cry with joy and at the same time he was so sad because he was fucking everything up just like usual and he knew it was his own damn fault.
"I'm sorry for being such a fuck up Danny."
"And here we go again... Stop the self pity once and for all, this is not what I meant and you know it."
"No, I mean you're right, and I want to stop doing that, but I don't know how!"
The tears were now really falling.
"I'm not sure I know either, but we'll figure this out, okay? You're not alone..."

Danny sat on the bed beside Mello and put an arm around his shoulder in a paternalist way.
"I'm tired of being scared all the time."
Danny was surprised. He had imagined all sorts of things explaining Mello's behaviour, and although Mello had confirmed that his reasoning was pretty spot on, he had no idea that Mello was actually scared to that point. Afraid to lose people he cared about, okay, but all the time... it must be so hard to live with a permanent fear inside...
"What scares you?" he asked, wanting to go deeper in understanding.
"Everything. I'm scared that the people I like will have enough of me and still I can't stop being a dick with them, I'm scared that I will blow up because there's something getting on my nerves, sounds, smells, stuff like that, I'm scared that Matt is playing me and he will laugh at me on the final day when I announce the winner... there's just too much, all the time... and what if I lose my career because of the show, or because my hand never heals or whatever would happen with the label? And I do everything in my power to fuck it even more instead of trying to make it better..."
"That's the point, once things get fucked up for good, they're gone, and although the pain of losing everything is there, the stress of dealing with the situation is gone, that's why you do it."

Mello straightened, looking at Danny, who smirked.
"Thank you internet." he chuckled.
"Keep on surfing then, because it really helps." Mello replied, smiling.
"Will do. But don't ask me how babies are made because this, you'll have to figure out by yourself, that's not my job."
Both laughed, Danny squeezing Mello's shoulder before standing up from the bed.
"Listen Mello, things will happen the way they have to, you have no control over them, and what you don't realise is that when you go with your instinct instead of analysing everything, they usually work out, so give it a little rope sometimes, you're worth people's time, and those who don't see it, just leave them where they are. You will make mistakes, people will use you sometimes, it's not worth anticipating everything though, life is meant to be lived, not explained all the time."
Mello smiled again. He felt a lot better, although he still had a problem to solve.

"Get ready, you're supposed to call the guys in ten minutes."
"What about Matt?"
"No time, we're running late. We'll sort this out later, but he's not running away, don't worry."
Mello hated to leave the situation with Matt unattended, but he didn't have a choice right now, and Danny was right, Matt wasn't going anywhere and he'd find the time to talk to him and apologise.
It was just really hard to keep the stress of an unsolved fight inside of him when he was used to get rid of it as quickly as possible.

He wrapped his plaster in a plastic bag like the nurse had showed him and, getting rid of the semen stained bandage on his left hand, he showered quickly. His left hand wasn't so bad now anyway, there were still bruises, but overall, it was healing, nothing was broken, even if he had punched Matt's ex pretty hard. It hurt a bit when he moved his fingers but that was about all.
Dressing up, he barely brushed his damp hair before joining Danny in the main room. Seeing him arrive, the man pressed play on the hi-fi and the rock tune announcing the beginning of daily activities began to blare in the whole mansion.