Note: thanks everyone for your support.
This story is getting a little weird because I never expected to use so much of my own experience in it. Mello is not a self-insert, I haven't gone that far and never will, but well, I guess it's following a pattern I'm familiar with so I have to go on with it now that I started.

DAY TWELVE – 3 contestants / 1 to be eliminated

Matt woke up before Mello, and propped himself on an elbow, leaving the warmth of the blond's chest, to stare at him sleeping. The way Mello's arm, who had been around Matt's shoulders, fell back on the mattress heavily when the redhead moved, told Matt that the singer was not close to open his eyes.
Matt couldn't refrain a smile. Mello's impulsiveness the night before with something that seemed very close to a proposal, if not actually one, was also full of something Matt loved about Mello: his naïve take on relationships. Mello, now that his mind was made up, was into Matt with no refrain. He gave everything, and his feelings were so obvious, so very alive in front of the redhead's eyes, it was almost like an adolescent kind of love, where everything is seen as perfection and beauty. Matt didn't doubt that Mello's feelings were real, actually, this way of seeing love, from the blond, was how it should always be: full, sincere, and unconditional.

My poor baby... Matt thought, seeing how tired Mello seemed to be still, even after sleeping nine hours. This was one aspect of Mello's autism that Matt thought might be the toughest, dealing with things that tired him more than the average person, to a point of exhaustion that himself had never known, not even after playing the same game three days in a row. The mental wipe out was apparently worse than being just physically tired, seeing how Mello just couldn't hold back his tears the night before. He could usually keep his composure, but Matt had witnessed the slow loss of control over his emotions as a result of this exhaustion, and now Mello needed time to recover.

It reminded Matt of the time when Mello had totally flown off the handle with Lou, and cried, cowering, for hours, until he had just fallen asleep when he could take no more. It made sense now, but it had most certainly been as awful from Mello's side as from his or Lou's or Danny's. They hadn't understood what was happening, but Mello knew and couldn't prevent it either, and there might not be something worse for the singer than not controlling his actions, as destructive as they can be.

Matt was itching to hold Mello in his arms. He felt his chest constrict for him, for everything he was, and would be going through. He had never been one to feel protective but he was finding himself willing to do that for Mello.

The redhead decided to get up and clean the mess from round two that he could still feel between his legs.
He was coming back from the bathroom when Danny entered. Mello was still sleeping, and Matt hadn't been in the room so the tall man might have knocked to the door, no one could reply. Quickly, the redhead grabbed his tee shirt on the floor to hide his crotch, but Danny stayed unfazed.
"I've seen it all with him for years, I'll get used to seeing yours also." he chuckled, dismissing the awkwardness of the situation, "He needs to be ready in twenty."
"I'll wake h-"

Matt didn't have the time to finish his sentence that Mello's phone rang, stirring the blond from his sleep.
"Fuuuck..." Mello grumbled, grabbing the device and answering without checking the ID of the caller. Mello listened for a few seconds, before he sat up in a start, completely awake this time. His face became as pale as the sheets, and it was obvious he was in shock.
"'Kay, thanks for letting me know..." he whispered, before hanging up and letting the phone fall on the covers of the bed. His palm found his face, covering his mouth before he simply broke down in cries.
"Mello?" Matt was beside the singer in a split second, Danny following close, both worried.
But Mello could barely stop crying to articulate a word.

Danny took the phone to check who called.
"Oh." The expression on his face told Matt that the man had an idea of what was going on, and the way his eyes glistened meant that he was touched as well.
Mello suddenly crawled in Matt's arms, holding him so strongly that Matt could feel the singer's moral pain seeping through him.
"He's dead." he finally managed to say. Matt looked at Danny questioningly, but the latter had his eyes filled with tears, and exited the room without a word.
Matt checked for the caller ID himself, and understood. The call came from the hospital they had visited the other day after the gifts hunt. It didn't take long for the redhead to figure out that the sick kid Mello had been crying for that day in the corridor, was the one concerned.
He held Mello a bit tighter, feeling sadness spread into him as well. For the kid, because kids should never die so young, and not like that, and for Mello because it meant so much to him.

Danny came back two hours later. Mello had fallen asleep in Matt's arms after crying for a long moment, and his right hand man felt awful for waking him up.
"The production is not happy that we didn't follow the schedule and they want us to resume as fast as possible."
Mello wiped his tears, stood up, cleaned himself and got dressed.
"Call them again, push everything back, I can't do it today." His face was tensed, he looked even more exhausted than the day before, and so pale that Matt started to worry for his health as well.
"I already tried..." Danny replied, his look apologetic.
Mello grabbed his phone, speed-dialed and started yelling in the device as soon as someone picked up on the other side.
"YOU BASTARDS! IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK THAT YOU FIND YOUR FUCKING HEART FOR ONCE?!"
He barely listened to the person on the line before going back at it, but this time, his tone was low, threatening.
"Bring your ass here, all of you, in the hour. We're gonna have to talk about this all because I'm not taking this shit anymore."
And he hung up. Danny looked at Matt, and the redhead had no difficulty to understand what his expression meant: it was going to be ugly.

Indeed, within forty minutes, four persons from the production of the show were sitting in the main room with the request that all cameras were down. Danny had sent the three remaining contestants in their rooms, and he was himself standing near Mello, nervously watching his boss and his every moves, scared that things ended up worse than the day he has been violent with Lou. Even now knowing why Mello reacted violently when cornered, it didn't mean that Danny had the slightest idea about how to handle it.
Mello briefly talked with the production, then all discussions stopped as the singer seemed to send a text from his phone. Everyone kept silent after that.

Mello was in his usual fuzzy armchair, seething, and apparently he and the others were waiting for something. His expression was frightening and Danny wondered if the people from the production knew they were walking on eggs. They seemed determined, but if they did set Mello off, it would be devastating. It was not just them harassing the singer on the phone or bugging the device, it was concerning a very delicate situation, and their lack of compassion baffled Danny. He knew they could go to extents beyond what was acceptable, but that was now a new level of fucked-up.

What surprised Danny even more was when the rest of the band entered the mansion, when they were supposed to be on the road back home already. They had left before the call, knowing it was useless to wait for Mello to wake up, but had apparently turned around.
"He told us that he needed us." Tommy explained under the tall man's questioning look, as they all took place around Mello, who seemed a little bit better at the sight of his friends. Tyler squeezed his shoulder before sitting next to him.

"The reason I wanted you here guys is because it might end up with me leaving the show, and you know what it would mean for my personal contract with the label. It would affect the band as well if I'm out of contract, since I'm pretty sure they will either force you to stay and hire a new singer, or force you to resign, and ruin all of us in the process. I want you to know that if you decide to continue without me, I'll understand. But I can't accept to go on with the show in the actual conditions, I'm not giving air time to make those sick bastards richer than they already are. I'm sorry but I have to do it my way."
Mello's voice was slightly shaky, but he just couldn't accept the unacceptable, this had gone too far. They wouldn't even let him attend the funeral in two days because it was the final of the show.

Tyler was the first to speak up.
"I don't know about you guys, but I'm not doing this, the band I mean, without Mello, so if he's out, I'm out. I've got no girl or kids so I'll fall back on my feet if they take everything I have. I started with nothing but a friend, and if it has to end the same way, I'm fine with it."
Mello looked at the bassist but he couldn't say a word.
"Don't look at me like that, what did you expect?" he squeezed Mello's shoulder again.
"I suppose I'm out as well. You Mike?" Tommy turned to look at the drummer.
"My wife won't be happy to have me at home all day but hey, a man gotta do what a man gotta do." Mike smiled to Mello, "But I guess we can rearrange my garage again to rehearse like in the old days."
Mello turned to Danny with an uneasy look, and was about to speak but his right hand man short-circuited him.
"Don't you dare worry about me." he simply said with a smile.

"Does anyone care about what we have to say or are you going to keep up with the sappiness?" a man in his forties from the production finally said in a condescending tone, "Not that your label wouldn't be happy to grab a few more millions, but you would really bet your whole career on a whim, just because you're unable to follow a schedule and set your feelings aside?"
"You do realise that not only you'd have to pay for the losses if the show is being cancelled, but if you have anything left after that, the label will pay itself for the breach in the contract and leave you without even a roof over your head, Mello?" a woman added.
"I do." the singer was surprisingly calm, "You might not grab the concept of integrity but at least I'll have mine."
"Integrity has never fed anyone Mello." the man went on, "You don't even own the songs, the label does, so you'll be left with no material to print, and no way to come back. And they could still make money on you."
"They don't own my brain and my talent."
"Because you think you can start all over again without a dollar? What world are you living in for God's sake? Come back to reason Mello! You're completely blinded by your little tantrum but it won't end well for you, no matter what you're thinking right now! I'm sorry for your loss but there has never been better circumstances to say this: the show must go on."
"Like hell you're sorry." Mello spat disdainfully.
"And this is not counting on your reputation being totally ruined, and the possible lawsuits you're facing, you know what I'm talking about." the woman added in an attempt to sound threatening.

Both her and the man were realising that Mello wouldn't change his mind, and that the money incentive had no effect on him. From his debuts with his label, they had understood that they would have little control over the musician, and they had made sure to tie a tight knot around his neck, in terms of contract clauses and rights on his music. They had worked with him for years, and that was why they were part of the production of the show as well: because they knew him. The creator of the show knew of Mello's reputation as well and had wanted some kind of assurance, and what was best than people used to Mello's antics?

Except that they had a big problem now: if Mello indeed left the show, they were risking a lot since Mello would cover the losses of the show itself in terms of broadcasting, merchandising and ads slots, but the channel on which the show was aired was facing a backlash from the fans and audiences could drop for the whole of the programs. They were aware that Mello would be asked for interviews a lot after such a cancellation, and he wouldn't hesitate to say what happened, and even if they had means to discredit him, most of Mind Pollution's fans would be faithful to the artist. They had always been. But if they could make it sound otherwise, they would try their best at it. Mind Pollution was the major seller for the label, and they didn't want to lose them.

Mello was now wondering if they thought he was that stupid, or unaware of reality. They were so far gone in their acting that they didn't even realise that they didn't sound credible.
But Mello had the upper hand in this: they were expecting him to blow up, just like he would have done in the past. He was unable to remember how many times they had called the security on him in the label's offices, when he had been unhappy with decisions they had made for him, or when he had found himself trapped by a clause of his contract.
But even if he wanted to beat them to a pulp right at that moment, make them swallow back their poor trials at bribing him and their superior attitude, he tried to stay focused on the fact that Matt was upstairs, reachable, that his bandmates and Danny were by his side and ready to support him, and somehow, things seemed a lot less hard to deal with.
They expected a storm, but it was only a cold rain they were going to get.
Stay focused, the pain can wait, you have to do this, he kept repeating in his mind.
Mello surprised himself with how he could separate himself from his emotions in this moment. He didn't recognise himself...

"Build your defence on lies and rumours if you want, I'm playing the physical proof card, and I don't think you have enough game to counterpart that." the singer finally said, the production people looking at him, not really understanding what he meant, "Brian, please."
A man appeared from the kitchen, camera in hand, and handed the memory card he had just taken off the device to Mello.
"I have an appointment with VH1 in about two hours, now you decide: this is going on air as soon as I get there, or we finish this show my way."
Tommy, Tyler and Mike were looking at each other, then at Danny.
"You knew?" Tommy asked the tall man.
"Nope." Danny shook his head.
"Simple, but effective, I guess..." Mike stated, tapping Mello's arm.
"You have no right to do that!" the woman looked indignant.
"Money's not working well to bribe me, but Brian was more easily convinced." Mello's sarcastic comment did hit its target as the man from the production stood up, trying to find something more to threaten the singer with, and failing miserably.
"See, you taught me well, I can have my own little reality show with that shit." Mello waved the small plastic piece before tucking it in his pocket, "So, what's your final answer? Either way is fine by me so it's up to you, you go down in flames or we revise all contracts, starting with the show, and then the label."
"You're fired!" the woman yelled to Brian, turning to the cameraman who had a smirk on his face, totally unimpressed.
"I don't care, he gave me more today than what you guys give me in one year. And at least he's decent."
"I need to make a call." the man was obviously having a cold sweat. He stood up to leave the room.
"If you're concerned about the director of the label, he should be here anytime now, he hasn't missed a single second of the streaming we've provided him, and he is very much aware that your balls – and his - are turning blue by now. Yes, that's how hard I'm... we are holding them right now."

Mello's lawyer had made an appearance at some point, once the director of the label had arrived, and new contracts had been signed after hours of debating. Mello hadn't been able to win on the question of the rights on his music, the label did own the songs still, but at least he had been able to set a price for a possible buy back. He didn't own that much money, but he had the option that if he met such an amount before the end of his contract, they were forced to sell the rights. Mello had only accepted, even knowing that he would never earn that much, because all other terms had been in his and the band's favour. But the contract ended in a year, for the tenth years anniversary of the band on this label, so it bugged him still that, since he would never sign for one single day of more with these bastards once he's be out of contract, he'd never get to own what he had created.

Matt was refraining the urge to run downstairs and take Mello in his arms. Yes, the sadness was still here and he could hear it in Mello's voice as well, but through the door of his room that he had cracked open to spy on what was happening, he had witnessed the fuckers being slapped hard in the face, and Mello playing a masterpiece of his brilliant mind, using the production's ways to turn the situation to his advantage. And most of all, he had trusted his bandmates and realised that he was not alone, and would never be.
But the show... Matt wondered what Mello had in mind for the final, since his choice was already made but there was still three of them in here.

A few hours later, around 8pm, Mello was back from the hospital. He had wanted to go alone, and Matt was waiting for him, turning like a lion in a cage in the main room.
Charly and David had been particularly nice, offering to play a game with Matt, but the redhead just couldn't focus.
The two contestants perfectly knew that that were just pure decoration in the show by now, and somehow, they couldn't help but be happy for Mello and Matt because there was no denying that they truly cared for each other.

The singer entered with a box in one arm and nodded at Matt who followed him to his room.
Mello put the box aside, and sat on the bed. Matt had the awful impression that Mello had held everything inside from the moment the production had come here, and his eyes were neither wet not red, so he didn't seem to have cried at the hospital either. He was about to walk to the bed as well to sit beside Mello, when the blond stood up and walked to him, pushing him against the nearest wall slowly until Matt's back touched it.

Mello's look was particularly hard, as he looked into the redhead's. He grabbed his face with his left palm, and stared at him in silence.
"Are you okay?" Matt whispered, feeling anxious. He couldn't help but feel extremely impressed by Mello's icy eyes and the expression in them: a cold fury. He knew that it wasn't directed at him, just like Mello's wrath the day he has mistreated Lou wasn't directed toward the petite boy, the latter had just been an outlet. But it didn't mean that he wasn't going to be an outlet himself. It started to frighten him that he was ready to accept it, reminding him of an all too familiar situation a few years ago.
"I don't know how to switch back to normal." Mello simply said, and Matt could feel his hand hold his jaw a little tighter, "Help me... I feel like I'm going to hurt you on purpose just because I can't deal with all of what happened today. I don't even know if I want to cry or if I want to hit something or if I just want to go to sleep..."
"What can I do?" the redhead asked softly. He was scared, but at least Mello was aware that he could hurt him, he wasn't having a crisis of uncontrollable nature.

The blond's body was tensed and rigid against Matt's. He came even closer, trapping Matt completely. Matt tried not to freak out, but he had no idea what was going to happen, or what he should do. He was realising that it would never be easy with Mello, and it was calling back his darkest memories, and he had to face them although he didn't want to.
Mello's lips were suddenly on his, the kiss was hard, full of teeth and bites. Matt tried to kiss back, but Mello was already in his neck, biting even more between pecks on the skin, pulling Matt's shirt up with his valid hand.
The redhead shivered: Mello's hand was frozen. But he complied, and took his tee shirt off. The garment had not even touched the floor that Mello was pulling Matt's jeans down, so the latter got rid of them as well.

Matt was trembling slightly under Mello's forceful behaviour. It wasn't that he didn't want the physical contact, and he didn't mind it being a little rough, but Mello didn't seem to be in his right mind as for now so he had no idea what to expect. He didn't have to wait for long though, as he heard Mello's zipper open, and felt the blond lift him against the wall, enough so he could penetrate him.
Matt hissed at the pain but he had no choice other than wrap his legs around Mello's waist for support, as the blond began to thrust in him. The redhead bit his lip, trying to contain the noises that wanted to escape him, a mix of whines and moans. He was used to take bottom so the pain was not a big deal past the first few seconds, especially since they had had sex not that long ago, but Mello... was he even there right now?

Suddenly, he felt Mello inhale sharply in his neck, and his moves became less erratic, slower, as Mello's body moulded against his softly, all tension gone. Matt thought for an instant that Mello had come, but the singer continued to thrust for a few seconds before he let himself go down on his knees, bringing Matt along with him.
The singer straightened just enough so he could look at Matt, and tears started to spill.
Matt immediately took him in his arms, pulling Mello's face to his bare chest, and let it rest here, kissing the top of his head and stroking his back while Mello cried in silence. He wasn't mad at Mello for being harsh with him, it wasn't abuse, it hadn't even been violent, just a little rough, it was just Mello's fucked up way to come back to his senses, and although questionable from Matt's point of view, he couldn't blame Mello because his ways were different.
Everything would need adjusting over time anyway, and this was was just as good as another, they'd do with what they had.

Matt could feel Mello become flaccid inside of him, and the cries had died down. This, he knew what it meant. He lifted himself to get off Mello, and made him stand up as well, leading him like a puppet to the bed. He undressed him, pulled the covers to his chin, switched the lights off, before sliding under the sheets as well.
He put his arms around Mello, and stayed there, his chin on Mello's shoulder, his nose in his hair.

Mello slept til daybreak. Matt even checked his pulse once. The blond was so heavily asleep, his head facing the side opposite to Matt's, not moving even once in his sleep, that the redhead scared himself thinking that Mello had stopped breathing. Matt had never seen anyone sleep that heavily.

The singer woke up, still drowsy, and started to cry again as soon as he came back to his senses. Matt simply held him until he fell asleep again. Mello repeated this pattern several times, until he had no tears left to cry, and sat in the bed, fully awake.
"I'm sorry." He said, taking Matt's hand and looking at him with such a look that Matt was the one that wanted to cry this time.
"You have nothing to be sorry for." Matt knelt to get closer to Mello, and kissed him softly.
Mello looked down at Matt's hand in his lap, playing with his fingers nervously.
"Are you sure you're up to this? I mean... it will happen more than you think..."
"You don't realise you will also have to put up with me, do you? I mean, I'm a gamer, you might just want to kill me at some point when I've been stuck for several days in a row on the same game, that you have barely gotten two words out of me the whole time, and that there's a pile of old Chinese takeaway around me stinking the whole place." Matt chuckled.
"We're gonna be such a cute couple." Mello chuckled as well, looking at Matt with a sad look, although it was obvious he was feeling better.

They both laid down, Mello snuggling into Matt's arms, and stayed there for a while, since it was still very early and neither of them wanted to get out of bed yet.
"Will you come with me tomorrow?" Mello asked, his voice low, as if he was unsure that he had the right to ask this to Matt.
"Of course I will."
"Thanks."
"Mello, don't be sorry, and don't thank me, I'll do things for you and I'll accept things from you as well because that's normal, I'm not doing you favours, I love you, that's all."
"I was serious yesterday." the musician said, kissing the back of Matt's hand.
"I know." Matt smiled in Mello's hair.
"Is that a yes?" Mello's eyes were on Matt as he rose his head to look up, filled with anxiety.
"I could say that you'll know on the final, but knowing you, you're going to freak out even if my feelings for you are obvious so, yes, this is a yes." Matt laughed softly as Mello frowned slightly before smiling.
"You don't think it's too soon?"
"Do you?"
"Not to my standards."
"Then everything is fine."

Matt pecked Mello's lips before holding him closer.

"And to think I have no idea what name I'm going to have next to mine." Matt said after a while.
"No one knows my last name besides Danny."
"Is there a reason for that?"
"I just don't use it."
"Not even on your contracts?"
"Nope. Actually, Mello is the name I chose for myself, and I have a derogation to use it as my real name due to my notoriety under that name."
Matt raised an eyebrow, but it didn't even surprise him that much.
"Keehl". Mello said flatly.
Matt gave him a questioning look.
"K-E-E-H-L, Keehl, that's my last name. Well, my parents' last name, I never considered it mine. My first name, well, the one my parents gave me is Mihael. But don't you ever call me that."
"I won't, you're Mello to me." Matt seemed to think for a few seconds, "Keehl, like...?"
"Yeah, like Vincent and Yulia Keehl, the oh-so-great couple of actors the whole world admires."
"I understand the blond hair and blue eyes now."
"Half Russian, yeah..."
"But... you don't seem to have ties with them?"
"We have a difficult history." Mello hesitated for a moment, but went on, "They've drugged me since I was four because I was falsely diagnosed with hyperactivity, then put me in an institute until I was fourteen because they didn't want to deal with me since no treatment helped, and then it went downhill and I spent two years in a reformatory center because I injured a nurse that wanted to inject me a treatment that I couldn't physically stand, it was making me hurt all over and I just had enough but I accidentally broke her arm, and then I asked for my emancipation and I still have no idea how I got it considering my background, but I guess my parents just wanted to be rid of me for good so they signed whatever they had to sign at the time. Then I found a shitty job, bought my first guitar and Mind Pollution started one year later. Story over."

Matt had no idea what to say. He hadn't expected Mello to tell him so easily, and he just couldn't process the horror contained in what Mello had said so casually. It gave sense to a lot of things that had happened, Mello's autism was one thing but with such a past, no one, not even someone without autism, would be equipped to deal with life.
And thinking about Mello's parents... Matt had never really cared for them as actors, he didn't like the kind of movie they acted in, but talk about the American Dream, it was more akin to a nightmare, and the façade suddenly looked a lot less glamourous.

"Please, don't use my last name next to yours. This is a stranger's name to me."
"I won't."
"Can I use yours?"
Matt looked at Mello, surprised.
"Of course you can."
Mello smiled, letting his head fall on Matt's shoulder.
"That would help if you tell me what it is."
Matt chuckled. "Jeevas."
"Mello Jeevas. Sounds good."
"I should probably tell you also that Matt is not my actual first name. It's Mail, but everyone calls me Matt since preschool because it was also my father's first name so it was easier to use my second name."
"Okay."