Split

John's mouth dropped open in horror and he was frozen on the spot, his hands still holding the cord just above his feet. Finally, he was able to choke out, "S-Sebastian—! I—I know what you think, but this isn't what it seems!"

"Oh, it's not, John?" Jim said, laughing, standing up. "Then what exactly is it?" He smiled at Sebastian. "I'll be down in a couple minutes to answer your question. John has to hurry off to work, anyway." He strode to his closet and began picking out clothes to wear.

Sebastian stood in the doorway still, flabbergasted. "John—" he tried, but that was all he could manage, before he finally closed the door, furious, enraged, and went downstairs to place. John. John with Jim. Either Jim was forcing John to be there, or John wanted to be there. Was that the only reason he'd stayed with Sebastian in the first place? Because he had a thing for the baddies, the dangerous ones? How he felt about John went so cosmically beyond that, and the idea that John's interest was so casual was like a twisted knife.

John was frozen for about another minute, horrified, before he sprung into action, grabbing the clothes from Jim that he grabbed for him. "What the hell was that?! Why did you tell him to come in? Why didn't you tell him what's going on?" John frantically started tugging on the clothes, needing to talk to him.

"Oooh, Johnny, had you forgotten our agreement? Sebastian can't know that you're being forced into this. Or he dies," Jim said, barely containing a gleeful grin. "Now hurry up. You'll be late. I ordered the housekeeper to make some breakfast for you that you can take on the go. It'll be in the counter. Smooches."

John's heart sank. He couldn't even be allowed to explain it now? He felt like he was in a freefall and couldn't properly breathe. What was he going to do? His hands twitched to fists for a moment before he headed out of the room and hurried downstairs to find the other. "Sebastian—?"

Sebastian's face was red. He whirled on John and fought back every urge to punch him into next week. "So is that your kink, then, is it? You like the 'villains'? You like the adrenaline rush, huh? John—why the hell—I mean, Jim—" He suddenly felt a lot more sad and hurt and enraged now. "You should just go. Get the fuck out of here." God, he'd told John that he loved him! And he did, but how embarrassing!

"No, Sebastian, you don't understand, it's nothing like that. I...I love you, Sebastian,' John blurted, unsure of what he could possibly say to sway the other's mind without actually telling him what was happening.

Sebastian looked at John. He could spot liars—he made a career out of it—and he knew John was telling the truth. "God, he's forcing you," Sebastian said, looking up the stairs. "He's forcing you not to tell me." It was such a Jim thing to do. "Why you?" He closed the gap between him and John in a few steps. "Tell me it's true, that he's forcing you. I mean, you're not willingly...you can't be..."

John opened his mouth and didn't know what to say. What if Jim was listening? If Sebastian came to the conclusion on his own, would Jim still kill him? Was saying yes right now technically telling him anything? John didn't know what to say, but he didn't want to say nothing and give Sebastian the impression that he was doing it willingly.

"John—" Sebastian's voice was almost pleading. "God, tell me you're not...attracted to him. Please."

John gave a pleading look in response. "Sebastian, I...' John looked away and pressed a hand over his mouth. "I have to go," he whispered, feeling sick. Maybe it would just be better this way, if Sebastian thought he liked Jim. It would put him out of danger, wouldn't it? John turned and hurried out the door without looking back.

Sebastian stood, staring at the closed door, frozen, then snapped to motion and bounded up the stairs two at a time to Jim's room. "Jim! What the fuck is going on?!" He demanded.

Jim blinked at him innocently as he tied his tie. "I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about, Sebby, darling. I told you'd I'd be down in a moment, now run along."

Sebastian snarled and yanked Jim over by his tie, twisting it. "Why him? Are you jealous that I have someone? Is it to get at Sherlock?! There are better ways, you know! Let me have someone for myself, you piece of shit!" He never spoke to Jim that way, but he was so enraged that he wasn't thinking.

Jim snarled and backhanded Sebastian across the face. "What I do is none of your business," he hissed. A slow smirk spread across his face. "Although, I suppose you do have a point because who I do, apparently is. Quite a good little shag isn't he, the good doctor? Nice and tight—bet you like that, don't you, Seb?' Jim's smirk only widened as he straightened out his shirt.

Sebastian's face stung, and he lunged at Jim, tackling him to the floor. "I will kill you, I swear to GOD I will kill you—fucking leave him alone!" He was about ready to black out, he was so mad. He could choke Jim to death right now. The thought of Jim seizing and taking John was too much.

Jim erupted into giggles. "Oh, Sebby, dear, you're so cute when you're possessive." He arched his neck and bit down hard on Sebastian's lower lip and drew it out viciously, drawing blood and making Sebastian groan. Suddenly, Jim's knife was drawn from his suit pocket and pressed against the artery in Sebastian's neck. "Ooooh, Seb," he breathed, his eyes dark and cold as Sebastian shook in rage above him. "You're mine, he's mine...and I hardly think you can be angry for John and I fucking as that would make you quite the hypocrite...wouldn't it?"

He couldn't say anything to that. He had been Jim's sexual plaything ever since he'd been in his employ, and the worst of it was, he didn't hate it half the time. If he told Jim the truth, that he loved John, then Jim would use it against him. "Please, Jim—please leave him alone. I'll do anything you want me to. Anything. Please," he begged. "I'll be yours—but please leave John alone."

"Adooorable, Sebby, but you already are mine. Besides, Johnny's far too much fun for only one," he said, his soulless eyes black. "Now get off, or I'll slit your throat," he said casually.

Sebastian got off, his heart constricting. "Jim," he said. "I won't let this happen. Please. I will do anything. When have I ever begged for anything in my life? Let. John. Go. What could he possibly mean to you?"

Jim's eyes narrowed at him as he stood and brushed his shirt off. "I could ask you the same thing. What does he mean to you? Clearly more than you're letting on."

Sebastian's heart pounded. "He means a lot to me, as you've obviously noticed," he said tersely, then finally mumbled out, "I love him." He knew it was a mistake, but Jim would realize it anyway. And it felt good admitting it out loud.

Jim's eyes went wide for a moment before another slow smirk spread across his face. "Ooooh, Sebby...Sebby, Sebby, Sebby, what have you gone and done?"

Sebastian grit his teeth. "Jim. When have I ever asked you for anything? How many times have I saved your life? How many times have—for fuck's sake—how many times have I blown you?"

Jim's devilish grin was so wide it nearly split his face in two. "It doesn't matter, darling. The real question is: How many times have I told you not to let sentiment get involved? That's lesson ONE! Oh dear, but we are in a mess, aren't we?'

"We wouldn't have to be, and you know it," Sebastian said. He weighed his options. He could try to kill Jim. But could he? Could he bring himself to do it? He'd been so close to doing it just a few minutes ago, but that had been in a fit of rage. And he was still enraged with this man. "Just answer me one thing. Why? Why him?"

Jim shook his head lightly and clicked his tongue disapprovingly. He slowly took a step forward to press up against Sebastian and titled his head up to the other's ear and whispered lightly, "Because he wanted it, that's why." Jim turned his head just a bit and pressed a soft kiss just under Sebastian's ear before he pulled back.

Sebastian's skin crawled as Jim's lips brushed his skin, and he stared at him in disbelief and loathing as Jim pulled back, raising an eyebrow to make an expression that was at once threatening and amused. He strode past Sebastian and out his bedroom door, grabbing his suit coat as he passed by.

It couldn't be true, Sebastian thought. It couldn't be. Jim was lying. John would never. He heard Jim walk down the stairs and step out the door, then he grabbed his phone and texted John.

We need to talk. When are you off work? –SM

Two. -JW

I'll meet you at the cafe across from the clinic then. -SM

Sebastian drummed his fingers on the cafe table, arriving twenty minutes before John was off. He wondered if he would be able to bear it if John said he was attracted to Jim. He wondered if he could bear it. Jim would never let him leave, but Sebastian might very well try.

John didn't want to have this talk. He had been distracted and off his game the whole day, which was why he was off so early. It was his first day back since his "mugging" and Sarah asked if he was ready to come back yet, noticing his subpar work. He'd replied honestly that he really wasn't and since it was a slow day, she'd said he could leave after his last appointment at one thirty. So, taking a deep breath, John walked into the cafe and dropped down across from Sebastian. "Hello."

Sebastian's eyes flicked to John, then into the depths of his coffee cup, unable to meet John's eyes again. Being around John even now was electric. It had been days since he'd properly seen or touched him, and it was driving him mad. He felt a twisting pit in his stomach. "So, is that where you've been these past few days? With Jim?"

"Not the whole time," John said softly, averting his eyes. He'd been trying to heal up his wounds after Jim had raped him earlier that week.

Sebastian looked up at John and saw the faint traces of the marks on his wrists. It was all coming together now. "John, the marks on your wrist—that night at the hotel—" Sebastian reached across the table and gently took John's hand. "It was Jim, wasn't it? He did something to you."

John flexed his jaw and tugged his hand away, not wanting to see any of the deeper cuts, and tugged down his sleeves.

Sebastian's empty hand rested on the table. "Do you—I mean, are you attracted to him?" He found the question so difficult to spit from his mouth.

John swallowed. If he said "no", then it might be counted as telling Sebastian, and he had no way of knowing if Sebastian had been bugged. He could be bugged, for all he knew. John didn't put it past Jim to get away with such a thing.

If he said "yes," though, he would ruin any future chance he had with Sebastian. Either way, he would lose him. He preferred to keep Sebastian alive. With a heavy heart and a lump in his throat, John said, barely above a whisper, "Yes."

Sebastian felt as if his heart had been slammed with a hammer. He stared at his coffee. "Oh—" he said blankly after a moment. What did one say when one's heart shattered? He sat dumbly for a moment, then he felt himself growing hot. "So...was I not rough enough for you? Is that how you like your men? Sadistic?" He stood up. "Sorry I didn't fulfill that for you!"

It took everything John had not to burst into tears. He could practically hear Sebastian's heart breaking. He wanted to accuse Sebastian of sleeping with Jim too, of saying this wasn't all his fault, of saying Sebastian had lied to him, or at least hadn't told the entire truth, but what was the point? There wasn't one.

John sat silently hunched in his chair, feeling as if Jim Moriarty had an invisible iron fist that was squeezing his heart to pulp. John couldn't even speak. He wouldn't deny anything Sebastian had just accused him of. It would be less complicated if he just let Sebastian draw his own conclusions, however false they were. For Sebastian's own safety. "I'm sorry," John finally said, his voice strained and barely audible.

Sebastian stared at him, torn between punching John and falling to his knees and begging John to reconsider his choice. He forced himself to stand up instead. "Goodbye, John," he spat, and stormed out, leaving John alone at the table.