My chapter two turned out to be longer than expected, so I magically turned it into two chapters :')
Once again, I hope you'll enjoy reading!

Lots of love, Tearsbehindthemask

"Greasy food and beer. I like this day."
Sam absently sipped his beer as Dean stuffed his mouth with fries and whatsoever.
"What's up, Sammy? Why the long face?" Dean inquired before gulping down what was left of his beer.
Sam looked up at Dean and shrugged.
"I don't know, Dean. I guess I'm just… tired or something."
Dean put his beer back on the table and looked up at Sam, obviously feeling guilty.
"Sorry about making you sleep outside, Sam. I was a bit… preoccupied last night."
Sam snorted. "Yeah, I got that."
When Dean wanted to reply, Sam held up his hand and shook his head.
"It's fine, Dean. I'm fine."
Sam finished his beer and looked around the bar, avoiding Dean's concerned eyes.
Damn. He didn't need Dean worrying about him like that. Or maybe he did.

A blonde girl in a tiny black dress, showing cleavage that would make any porn star jealous, walked into the bar and Sam gritted his teeth as Dean's attention immediately shifted to the girl.
"I'm gonna get another beer." Dean muttered, without taking his eyes off the blonde, "You want something?"
Sam just stared at his brother's frame as he was getting ready to walk over to the bar so he could offer the girl a drink when she'd get there; it was one of Dean's oldest tricks and, though he would never admit it, Sam admired him for being able to pick up girls any time. Of course, Dean didn't actually need pick-up lines or tricks; with a gorgeous, muscular frame like Dean's and a pair of gorgeous eyes and almost feminine lips, Dean was already attractive enough without all of that bullshit.
"No, I'm fine."
"Suit yourself."

Dean picked a spot at the bar where the girl wouldn't be able to miss him and sat down to order a beer. He sat up straight, his shoulders seemingly broader than usual, and a confident smirk on his face. As he turned around and winked at Sam, Sam's face flushed, having been too immersed in observing his brother and consequently fighting the urge to run towards Dean and demand his full attention before the girl would. He quickly looked the other way, leaving Dean frowning at him as he wondered what was up with his brother.
Dammit, Sam. You need to stop this. Now.

Dean wondered what was up with Sam, with him suddenly turning away from him. His brother was holding his head in his hands, running a hand through his longish, brown hair.
Seriously, what was his deal? Dean had noticed that Sam had been acting kind of strange lately, he'd caught Sam staring at him at a number of times; not the usual 'I-know-you're-not-fine-Dean-so-tell-me-about-it' stare, his eyes were even more intense than when Sam stared at him like that. There was a new emotion in his eyes. Dean couldn't put his finger on it. Hell, sometimes it seemed like Sam was a completely different person than the brother he had known all of his life.
Little Sammy had really grown up; Sam had turned into a ridiculously tall and buff chick-magnet and Dean couldn't help but feel proud of his little brother. To compensate with the tough look of his body, Sammy still had a kind face with his adorable, big eyes and framed by beautiful, brown hair. Yes, his brother had grown into a great man; the only thing that really concerned Dean was the troubled look that appeared on his face every now and then.
The look that Sam wore on his face right now was one of the looks that worried him.
"Hey, are you all by yourself tonight?"
Dean looked away from his brother and looked right into the gorgeous blonde's face. Okay, he had to admit, she had looked better from a distance, but at least her body looked just as appealing as it had done from a distance.
"No, I'm here with my brother." Dean said, pointing out Sam sitting at their table.
"Wow, your brother is quite handsome." she said, appreciating Sam's long limbs and muscular built.
Dean gritted his teeth. She was way too interested in his little brother.
"Don't waste your time, sweetheart." Dean said, smiling sweetly, "He's not interested in women."
"Oh… Right."
Dean felt bad about lying. He wondered why it even upset him that the blonde girl was so interested in Sam. Besides, it wasn't like Dean really liked the girl.
"Ah well, you look just as gorgeous, hun. What's your name?"
Dean stared at the girl and realised that he didn't feel the need to get the girl a drink anymore.
"My name is Dean. Nice meeting you."
"Pleasure. I'm Monica."
Monica shook Dean's hand, holding it a bit too long, and then let him go, smiling seductively as her fingers brushed his palm.
"Well, Monica, it was indeed a pleasure. So… You have a great night."
Dean smiled as he stood up and walked away, leaving Monica staring after him in confusion. She'd never been turned down by the men in this bar before.
"You're not buying me a drink?" she called after him.
"Sorry, sister. Poker game went bad."

Dean sat back down at the table and Sam couldn't help but stare at him for a while.
"Dude. You're not gonna hit that?"
Dean shrugged and chugged down at least half of his beer.
"Nah. Great body, nothing more."
"Yeah, so what's the problem?"
Dean looked back at the blonde and shook his head.
"I dunno, man. I guess I'm just not in the mood."
Sam nodded, still confused. To distract him from something that Dean could not explain anyway, Dean said: "She did think you were handsome though."
"What?"
Dean observed his little brother to see how he'd react to what he'd just said. Sam's face didn't actually show any other emotion than confusion and Dean sighed.
"I told her you were gay."
"You what?" Sam asked dully.
"Told her you were gay."
"But I'm…"
"I know."
"… So why…?"
Dean grinned and clapped Sam on the shoulder, resting his hand there for a bit and squeezing softly.
"Her interest in you bothered me. I dunno."
Sam sucked in his breath and couldn't stand looking into Dean's mischievously sparkling eyes for long.
"I… eh… I just…"
Dean took his hand off Sam's shoulder and frowned worriedly. "Hey man, I'm sorry… I didn't know you were interested in her…"
"No! No, no, no! It's not like that…" Sam stammered, way more upset than he should be, "I… It's just…"
"Oh, okay." Dean acknowledged, "But then… why do you look so stressed out?"
Sam shifted his weight on his chair and looked down at the table.
"I… No reason."
Sam could still feel Dean's hand on his shoulder as he reached out to him again, this time putting his hand on Sam's knee.
"Are you sure you're okay?"
Sam's chair fell over as he got up too quickly and backed away from his brother's touch.
Dean was left staring at his little brother, hand hovering mid-air.
"I'm fine, Dean!" Sam gulped, trying to stop the overwhelming feelings that now threatened to take away his sanity.
"Then what the hell is this?" Dean snapped, pacing over to his brother, grabbing his shoulders and shaking him.
Sam's behaviour was really starting to worry him. It worried him when he didn't know what was troubling his little brother.
"I just… I don't feel so good." Sam muttered, avoiding eye contact and pushing Dean's hands from his shoulders.
"What? Like the flu? Mental breakdown? What is it?"
"It's nothing to worry about." Sam said, shaking his head, more to convince himself than anyone else. "I just… Do you think you can deal with this gig by yourself?"
Okay, now Dean was really, really worried.
"What? Yeah, but why? What's the deal?"
"I just feel really tired. Probably just something to do with my night outside… I'm just gonna go back to the motel and catch some sleep… Will you be okay by yourself?"
Dean didn't like how Sam was acting but he shrugged and nodded, realising that he was in fact to blame for leaving Sammy out in the cold last night.
"Yeah, sure. I'll guess I'll see you tonight then."
"Yeah. Yeah, thanks."
"Sammy!" Dean called, as his little brother made his way toward the exit.
Sam turned around and Dean could've sworn that those were tears glistening in his brother's eyes.
"I'm sorry."
Sam nodded and got out of the bar in no time. He needed to get away from Dean; now.
As he walked, tears streamed down his face, blurring his sight and making him feel even worse than he did at the bar.
Dammit. Dean's concern about him had only confused him more; he had wanted to lean into Dean's touch but backed away from it. He had hated Dean for leaving him to hit on that woman, but had felt distressed when he had left her at the bar.
What the hell was wrong with him?

When Sam got back to his room he took another cold shower. Thinking about Dean had not only caused confusion, thinking back at the slightest touch of Dean's hands on his body had stirred up a whole range of feelings of which arousal was not the least important one.
Goddammit. There was something really fucked up about this.
Just say it, Sam. Just admit it.
Sam's warm tears mingled with the cold water from the shower as he sank down on the tiles and whispered, to no one in particular: "I'm in love with my brother."

As he said it, a shiver that wasn't caused by the cold water, that still continued to cool Sam's feverish body, ran down Sam's spine. How could he be in love with Dean?

Besides the whole incest issue, Sam had never considered himself to be gay.
Well, he wasn't gay, he liked girls… So why on earth would he have feelings for his brother out of all people?!
Sam stared at his unhealthy looking face in the mirror and his reflection stared back at him, desperate for answers.
There was something very wrong here.
Where had his feelings for Dean come from? When did they start?
Of course he'd always felt very strongly about his brother, but that was only natural since they were brothers and they had nobody but each other. They had been everything to each other. Dean had been taking care of him ever since his mother died; Dean had been a mother, a father, a friend, a companion, a role model… But never a love interest.

It was a sin to think about your own brother in this way. He would never fall for his brother like this. Sam had loved his brother for all the right reasons. There was no way he would actually fall in love with his brother. It wasn't like Sam. It was impossible that he'd…
Sam froze, a terrifying thought taking over his mind and paralysing his body. He stood in the middle of the bathroom, icy water still dripping from his hair and rolling down his bare skin.
It wasn't him.
Sam Winchester would never fall in love with his brother.
Maybe someone else would.
A man possessed could.
Shaking uncontrollably, Sam grabbed the sink to steady himself and tried not to throw up.