A/N: Sorry for the wait guys. It's crazy at my workk right now. So many have quit, and for us who's still working there the workload is crazy. But here's another chapter.
The day was spent watching different movies and playing board games. Martin and Kristen went to Cincinnati and bought pizzas for dinner. Blaine slept all day. When he was woken for dinner he was grumpy and sad. He ate with tears running and couldn't stop them. Kurt and Carole tried to talk to him but he snapped them off. He didn't wanna talk he made it really clear. When he had eaten a small piece of the pizza he left the table without a word and went back to the couch. He was sleeping within a minute.
"Carole..." Kurt said.
"I know. Hannah warned for this. It will be days when he doesn't wanna talk and then we should just let him be. No pressure, let him process everything."
"It sucks though..."
"I know honey. Why don't you guys take a little walk after dinner? And I'll keep Blaine company?"
"Sounds good, right Kurt?" Mercedes said.
"Yeah, okay."
The teens took a walk while the adults stayed at the table talking. Carole was aware of Blaine all the time and watched him starting dreaming. She watched him wake up with a jolt and looked confused around him. He stood up and looked around.
"I have to go down..." He mumbled and stumbled down the stairs.
Carole stood up and followed him. She kept her distance but went after him.
Blaine didn't know what he had dreamt, he just know he woke up feeling scared, sad and lonely. He stood up and went out of the big house. He needed to get away, he needed to be alone. All these feelings were creeping up on him and he needed to get away. From what he wasn't sure about, if it was away from the feelings or from the company or the place. He just felt he needed to go. The tears started falling as he stepped outside. He stumbled down to their house and went inside. He hadn't the strength to go upstairs so he collapsed on he couch and let the feelings wash over him.
He cried until he couldn't breath anymore. He cried for the little boy who had fought all his life for some love or recognition from his parents. He cried for the boy who never would get love from his parents. He cried for the 16 year old who hadn't been allowed to cry for his mother. He cried and he couldn't stop it.
He didn't hear the front door open and he didn't hear Carole sit down next to him. He flinched when she put a hand on him.
"I'm here Blaine, you're not alone." She said in a soft voice.
"I don't wanna talk." He managed to get out between sobs.
"You don't have to."
"I wanna be alone."
"I love you too much for that. But I'm just gonna sit here."
Carole watched her son cry his eyes out. Hannah had talked about this with Carole; it would come moments, or even days, when Blaine needed to cry. This was one way to process. She and Kurt had cried the other day about the same things Blaine cried about now. It would be days when Blaine was happy and energetic, it was also a way of processing. They had to let Blaine be sad when he was sad and happy when he was happy. Carole didn't say anything else. It broke her heart to see her son so heartbroken, but it wasn't anything she could do about it at this point.
She got up and got some paper and a glass of water from the kitchen and the went back to the couch. She placed a light hand on Blaine's shoulder and gave him the paper. He took it and cleaned his nose. It didn't really help since he couldn't stop crying. Carole started stroking his hair since she know it calmed him down. She didn't want him to get to a panic state in his crying, which she had seen many times in the hospital.
The stroking did calm him down and when he noticed her fingers in his hair he took a hold of her hand and pulled it closer. He was still crying heavy, but he could breathe now. He pulled her hand to his chest and hugged it tight. Carole scooted closer and pulled him closer. He immediately moved so he was in her arms. He was laying with his upper body in her embrace.
Crying like this was exhausting and Carole wasn't surprised when she felt him calming down even more in her arms and then fall asleep. She was holding the weight of his upper body in her arms, and even though Blaine didn't weigh much, it was still too much for her arms. She managed to pull a pillow under her arm and ease him down a bit. They had sat like this before and she knew for experience that he would wake up if he lost contact with her.
Five minutes after Blaine had fallen asleep she heard a quiet knock on the door and then she saw her husband entering the room. He looked at them and sat down next to Carole. He took her in his embrace and took some of Blaine's weight from her. When Blaine noticed the change he shifted so he was on his back with his head on her lap. Tears were still running and Carole swiped them away but new kept coming. Carole stroked his wet cheek. Blaine started snoring and Burt chuckled.
"If he was our biological son, I'd totally blame that in your genes! You sound the same!" He said to her.
"I don't snore!"
"Oh, right..."
"I do?" Carole asked.
"Mmmhmmm..."
"This loud?"
"Not all the time..."
"Oh my god..."
"I kinda feel bad for the nurses who were in watch with you two sleeping in the same room."
"Burt!"
"Just kidding, hon, I love your snores!"
"Do I wake you during the night?"
"No, I sleep right through it!"
"Kinda like Kurt..." Carole said. "Speaking of Kurt..." She continued. "I don't feel good about leaving him here alone with Blaine unstable like this."
"I understand that." Burt said and pulled her closer and kissed her on her hair.
"I think I need to stay here this week. And then you can come down here next weekend and we'll see how he's doing then?"
"That sounds good." Burt said.
"Why do you sound sad then?"
"I miss you Carls." Burt said and leaned his head against her.
"Miss you too Burtsie. But soon you'll be tired of me when I'm home all the time."
"Not possible." Burt said and hugged her closer.
The say still for a while before Burt broke the silence.
"How are you feeling?"
"I'm fine."
"But I mean for real, Carls. We haven't spoken for real for a long time." Burt said.
"I'm... I don't know. Sometimes when I see Blaine like this, I get so mad and so sad. Who the fuck did they think they were screwing with a child like this? It's so... I don't even know. I want to make them pay for it. Blaine's the greatest kid ever and they never found that out. Instead they destroyed him. They broke him.
"It was so many times at the hospital when Blaine fell asleep from exhaustion, medicine or tears when I sat there holding him. Looking at him sleeping, either harassed by nightmares, or passed out, or like this; with tears running even in his sleep. It breaks my heart.
"At the same time I'm glad I can be there for him. During all our fights when he had screamed at me to leave him alone or leave the hospital or leave his life, I'm glad he feels like he can scream at me. He needs to scream, he's carrying so much pain.
"He has screamed himself hoarse, telling me to leave him alone, and then grabbed hold of me and through sobs told me he's sorry and begging me not to go."
"You never told me that." Burt said.
"I'm telling you now."
"How do you deal with that?"
"The only way possible - I've kept being there, telling him that I love him and that I won't leave him, evr. Hugging him, letting him be angry, telling him it's okay to be angry. It's new for him, being angry, he needs to learn how to be angry. Kurt and Finn learned that at a really early age but Blaine has still to learn it. I think he's getting it's okay to be angry, now he needs to learn how to handle it."
"What that was happened here before I came here?"
"No, now he wasn't angry at all. He was just sad. He didn't say anything to me, and I didn't force him too. He has a lot to cry about and he's allowed to do that. And that's something we need to keep telling him."
Burt sat quiet watching Blaine and thinking about what Carole said. It didn't surprise him one bit when he felt Carole becoming heavy in his embrace and then started snoring. He smiled at his wife and his son snoring together. He leaned back and took a deep breath.
Kurt and Finn opened the door a while later and came into the living room.
"Hi kiddos." Burt said and smiled to them.
"Hi dad." Kurt said and sat down on the couch. Finn sat down on a chair.
They all looked at Blaine and Carole, still sleeping, still snoring.
"Dude, are you sleeping next to this every night?" Finn said looking at Kurt.
"Apparently so is dad." Kurt said.
"Yes, I sure am!" Burt said and chuckled.
"Are they okay?" Finn asked.
"I think so. Blaine was sad and Carole was just tired. But we spoke about next week. Blaine is still unstable in his temper. There isn't a risk for him hurting himself, but he's still struggling with a lot of stuff. And Carole feels like she wants to be there for him. So, she'll be staying here next week as well."
"So, you don't trust me?" Kurt said.
"That's not what I said, Kurt."
"Well, you implied it."
"No I didn't."
"Yes you did, dad! You don't think I can handle it?"
"Kurt, come on! Look at it from Blaine's perspective. It's better if he has two people to talk with..." Finn said.
"And if mom's here, you can do all the cosy stuff with him and she can take all the craziness." He continued.
"Yeah..." Kurt said looking at Blaine. "I'm guess you're right."
"Look, Kurt, we know you can handle Blaine. We know Blaine trust you and talk to you. Otherwise you wouldn't be staying here in your own house. But, sometimes Blaine might need an adult to handle this. And someone he isn't in love with. Someone he can scream at who can see it for what it is and doesn't take it personally. He loves you so much Kurt, sometimes that will stop him from saying what's on his mind." Burt said.
"I want him to tell me everything though." Kurt said.
"I get that, but you know when he's taken a lot of sedatives and talks without filter? What he says might hurt you, even though that's not his intention."
"Won't it hurt Carole?"
"Carole can see through it and take it like a mom; sometimes your child tells you stuff it doesn't mean, and even though it might hurt like hell, you know it's because you and your kid share an unbreakable love that it can say all these things. I don't think you and Blaine are there yet. It has nothing to do with how old you are, I believe you truly can find true love at 16 or 17, but you haven't been together that long. We don't wanna put that strain on your relationship, Kurt."
"Okay, I can see the point. Thanks dad."
"No problem kiddo."
"We were thinking of putting on an other movie, wanna join us?" Finn asked Burt.
"Yeah, sure, why not? If you can help me getting loose from these two."
"Shouldn't we wake them?" Finn asked. "You know, keeping the normal rhythm in life and stuff."
"Yes, maybe. But I think it will lead til Blaine sleeping on the couch in the other house." Burt said.
"I can live with that!" Kurt said with a smile.
"Okay, then."
Burt woke Carole who looked confused at her sons looking at her.
"We're gonna watch a movie and wanna watch it with you." Kurt said.
"Oh, that's nice!" She said and yawned. "Oh, I could sleep all through the night now."
"You can do that as well." Finn said. "You don't have to watch it with us."
"No, no, I want to. You're leaving tomorrow, right?"
"Yes, after breakfast." Finn confirmed.
"You are? I thought you were staying all weekend." Kurt said.
"No, Puck and Mercedes have to work tomorrow afternoon."
"That sucks."
"Yeah, well..." Finn shrugged.
"So, what about this one? He could also sleep all through night." Carole said and ruffled Blaine's hair.
"Either we wake him up and he walks up to the house and falls asleep again, or I could carry him up and down." Finn said.
"You'd do that?" Kurt asked.
"Of course, everything for my bros!"
"Then I think that would be the best."
Finn picked Blaine up. Blaine groaned and stirred a bit but Carole took hold of Blaine's head and placed it against Finn's shoulder, which stilled him. Burt and Kurt went ahead so when Finn came up to the living room it was just to put Blaine down on the couch. Kurt moved him a bit so he was laying with his head on Kurt's lap. Kurt smiled down at him when Blaine moved around to find a comfortable position. He shifted so he was laying on his side with his back to the back of the couch.
Rachel and Kristen had prepared some snacks for the movie; cheese and crackers with pears and grapes. They put on remember me and enjoyed the evening.
