A/N: you guys! I've gotten 100 reviews on this! I'm so spoiled! But I'm so happy, I can't even express my gratitude! Thank you so much!

The biggest thanks for this chapter, Lauren, who takes my strange sentences, which makes total sense in my head, and turns them into real English! She's the best! The next chapter comes soooooon, like tonight or tomorrow... These two chapters belong together!

The summer went way too fast for Blaine's and Kurt's liking. They went back home to Lima after the two weeks they spent in Cincinnati. In the beginning of August they went for their New York trip Blaine had gotten for his birthday. It was a perfect weekend filled with shopping, shows, good food, love, hugs and sex.

Other than that, they fell back into the rhythm they had had before Blaine was hospitalized; Blaine was back to therapy and Kurt was on Blaine-duty. They spent lots of time together. The therapy was still hard for Blaine and the days when he had therapy were mostly spent in bed; cuddling and napping; when they had came home from the hospital.

Then it came - the weekend before the last week of summer vacation. None of the boys wanted school to start; although Finn wasn't as anxious as Blaine and Kurt. Neither Kurt or Blaine spoke to the other about their thoughts about school though, until one night when they couldn't avoid it anyone.

It started with a nightmare; but this time it was Kurt who woke up Blaine with his screaming. Blaine, drowsy from the sleeping medicine, took Kurt in his embrace and held him tight. Kurt's screaming had woken up their parents who were standing in the door way watching them comfort each other. Burt and Carole smiled at them; Kurt looked so safe in Blaine's arms. Blaine was suddenly the strong one, the stable one; in the relationship. They could see Blaine sway a bit where he sat, his medicine in full effect, but Blaine was clearly struggling to get a clear head. He mumbled sweet nothing into Kurt's ear and held him tight. When Kurt had calmed down he looked up at Blaine. His eyes were cloudy and barely focused.

"Sorry I woke you." Kurt said.

"It's okay sweetie. I've woken you up so many times." Blaine mumbled.

"Yeah, but still."

"You wanna talk 'bout it?" Blaine slurred and tried to focus on Kurt.

"I do, but not tonight, tomorrow."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, come on, let's lay down." Kurt said.

Blaine nodded and laid down. He pressed Kurt close to his body. Kurt snuggled into Blaine's bed warm body. He felt Blaine fall back to sleep within seconds. Not long after he heard soft footsteps and soon he could see his father standing next to the bed.

"You okay, kiddo?"

"I am. Just a bad dream."

"You wanna talk about it?"

"Yeah, but with Blaine. Tomorrow."

"Okay, you sure?"

"Yes, he's too drugged to be able to hold a conversation now."

"Yes, I know that, but you can talk to me."

"I know dad, but I want to talk with him. He speaks to me and I want to do the same thing. I'm okay, dad. Otherwise I'd speak to you. I promise."

"I love you Kurt."

"Love you too, dad."

"Mmm..." Blaine mumbled in his sleep.

Both Kurt and Burt chucked at his timing.

"He's a good kid." Burt said.

"He's the best."

"Isn't his arms heavy around you when he's sleeping?"

"Yes, but it makes me feel safe. This is the best way to fall asleep. I feel completely protected when he holds me like this in his sleep. Cause if I move now, he'll move after me."

"I'm so happy for you, Kurt."

"Thanks, me too."

"Well, sleep tight then, see you guys tomorrow."

"Yes, you too."

Both Blaine and Kurt slept in next morning. From 10 am until noon they kept going in and out of sleep. They woke up and snuggled closer together and fell back to sleep. Since they never were awake at the same time, neither of them bother to wake up properly.

Carole knocked on the door just before noon to see that they were okay and to see that Blaine took his morning medicine. Kurt was the one who woke up by Carole's knocking.

"Good morning sweetie." She said to him.

"Mmm... Hi." Kurt said.

"You slept well?"

"I think I'm still sleeping well..."

"Okay, I get the hint, you don't need to wake up, I just wanted to see if Blaine has taken his medicine."

"No idea."

"You go back to sleep, I'll wake him up." Carole said and smiled at Kurt's short answers.

"No, no. I'm up! I've been semi-awoken for quite the time now; it's just so cosy here."

Kurt turned in bed and looked at Blaine. He was sleeping on his side and was pressed close to Kurt. When Kurt shifted Blaine moved even closer to him. Kurt smiled and pressed a kiss on his lips.

"Good morning sunshine!"

"Mmm..."

"It's time to wake up. Carole's here to see if you've taken your medicine."

"Mmmhmmm. I have." Blaine answered, still with his eyes closed.

"Okay, good. I'm gonna leave you then. There's lunch if you're interested."

"Lunch? What happened to breakfast?" Kurt asked.

"Well, you can have breakfast if you'd like, but its noon so for Burt and I it's lunch."

"Don't wanna leave the bed." Blaine mumbled.

Carole chuckled and leaned down to them. She pressed a kiss on both their foreheads.

"Tell you what? I can make you breakfast in bed if you'd like."

"No, you don't have to do that!" Blaine said and sat up. He forced his eyes open and looked at her.

"I know, but I'd like to. Let me spoil you some!"

"You sure?"

"Positive! I'll be right up!"

She left the room and Blaine fell back to bed. He turned to Kurt and smiled. He took him in his arms and pressed him almost painfully close. He snuggled his nose in to Kurt's neck.

"I love you, I love you, I love you." He said.

Kurt giggled.

"I love you too. Sometimes you're like a puppy."

"I just got overwhelmed by the love I feel for you." Blaine said and released his tight grip on Kurt so he could watch him.

"I never thought I'd feel so strongly for anyone." Blaine continued.

"Oh, Blaine! I feel the same way." Kurt said kissed Blaine on his head.

"You slept well?" Blaine asked Kurt as he did every morning.

"Ummh.. Not really, no." Kurt said and looked at Blaine.

"Aw, why not?"

"I had a bad dream."

"You did? Poor thing, you should have woken me!"

"I did. You comforted me actually."

"What?" Blaine rose up his upper body to look at Kurt.

"I woke up in your arms, you were comforting me. After a while, when you had calmed me down, you offered to talk about it but I could tell you were so effected by the sleeping medicine that it wouldn't be a good conversation. So we went back to sleep until now."

"I have no memory of this at all! I'm so sorry!" Blaine said and looked at Kurt with wide, round, sad eyes.

"No need to be sorry. Really. You did everything a perfect boyfriend would do! You comforted me, you held me, you offered to talk with me."

"But I don't even remember it!"

"Well, I do. And that's the most important thing in this scenario."

Blaine didn't say anything and looked away from Kurt.

"Blaine, really! It was my nightmare and you saved me from it. Stop focusing on what you think you did wrong and listen to what I'm saying."

"Okay..." Blaine mumbled.

There was a light knock on the door and Burt and Carole entered carrying trays.

"Good morning guys!"

"Good morning dad." Kurt said to him.

"You slept well after the nightmare?"

"I did thanks!"

"Burt was here as well?" Blaine asked.

"Yeah, but you were sleeping by then." Kurt said and then turned to his parents to explain. "Blaine doesn't remember that I had a nightmare."

"You don't?" Burt asked. "Too bad, you did all a boyfriend so suppose to do!"

They gave the teens the trays. Carole had made scramble eggs and bacon with toast to them.

"Wow, thanks mom!" Blaine said to her.

"You're welcome, honey!" She had to swallow down tears that was threatening to fall; she always became really emotional when Blaine called her mom when he wasn't drugged.

"We'll leave you guys here. There's coffee when you're done eating this."

"Thanks!"

They closed the door and Kurt and Blaine started eating.

"So, now that I'm not drugged, you wanna tell about the nightmare?" Blaine asked Kurt.

"Yes." Kurt answered and finished his orange juice. "But I really need to go to the toilet first."

"Okay, I'll get us some coffee in the meanwhile."

They met in the bed minutes later.

"So the nightmare..." Kurt started. "It was about McKinley and Dave. It was like I relived it all again. But I knew it was a dream because you were there the whole time."

"Did I stop it?"

"No, you didn't because you didn't know it was happening."

"But I was right there? That's not logical..."

"It was a dream, honey, they aren't logical. And I don't really feel like talking about it either. I wanna talk about the fact that in a week we are both leaving private school behind for good. Neither of us have special good memories from public school. How are you feeling about it?"

Blaine looked at Kurt and took a sip of coffee while considering how to answer.

"I actually have spoken to Hannah about it. Or, rather, she has tried to get me to talk about it."

"What? You don't speak to Hannah about it?"

Blaine shrugged but didn't answer.

"Blaine, what? Talk to me about it."

"I don't know..."

"Why don't you speak to Hannah about it?"

"I don't know Kurt." Blaine said and tried to back away, out of the bed.

"Blaine? What's up? I'm not gonna let you off the hook here!"

Blaine looked uncomfortable but stayed in bed. He looked up at Kurt.

"Kurt..." He started but didn't finish.

Kurt waited for him to continue, but he didn't.

"Blaine. You're kinda scaring me here, speak to me."

"I'm kinda scared." Blaine whispered.

"What? I didn't hear you."

Kurt leaned in when Blaine started talking again but once again he couldn't make out what he was saying.

"What? Once more?"

"I'm scared! Kurt! I'm terrified!" Blaine yelled and then put his hands over his mouth like he couldn't believe he actually said that.

Kurt saw the shame in Blaine's eyes. He didn't really understand what it stood for but he took Blaine's hands from his mouth and put them in his own lap.

"That's okay, sweetie." He said slowly.

"No, no, it's not. I've been in therapy for months. I've been thrown down the stairs by my father; I wanted to hurt myself, Kurt. I have gone through all that and more. And now I'm terrified for starting at McKinley. And I feel so ungrateful; your parents have done everything for me. I couldn't have dreamt of anyone doing all this for me, and here I am, scared as hell. I fucking terrified and I don't know what to do." Blaine kept rambling until Kurt took his face in his hands and gave him a kiss, just to stop him from talking.

"Blaine. Stop freaking out, it's okay." He said when he pulled away from Blaine's mouth.

"No! No it isn't!" Blaine said and opened his mouth for another round of rambling.

Kurt placed his finger to Blaine's lips to stop him.

"Sssh, honey. Let's talk about this one thing at a time. Okay?" He said. Still holding his finger to his lips. Blaine nodded and Kurt continued.

"Okay. I'm no Hannah, but let's start with why you aren't allowed to be scared. Do you remember when you told me that my feelings are as important as yours, even though I haven't been through everything you have?"

Kurt dropped his hands but Blaine didn't say anything, he just nodded.

"Do you still agree with that?"

"Of course!" Blaine said with emphasis.

"Good, I do as well. So, why shouldn't you be allowed to feel afraid now? You can't be afraid to start a public school because you've had shitty parents? So, years from now; if we are in a car-crash, or if we are being followed one dark night, you're not allowed to be afraid because your stupid father threw you down some stairs one Thursday when you were 16? Have you exhausted all your fear for the rest of your life?"

"Kurt..." Blaine said and hung with his head.

"No, I really want you to answer this. Have you used all your fear?"

"I don't... I didn't... I can't..." Blaine tried to form an intelligent sentence.

He sighed and looked up at Kurt.

"No, of course not."

"Good. Can we then agree on that your fear is relevant and a feeling that's totally allowed?"

Blaine hung his head again. Kurt placed his finger until Blaine's cheek and pressed his head up until their eyes met.

"Yes." Blaine said after a short silence.

"Good!" Kurt said and leaned forward and pecked his boyfriend on his nose.

"So, next item to be addressed; what are you afraid of?"

Blaine looked at Kurt with pleading eyes. Kurt could read them but he ignored the plead not to force him to talk about this. Eventually Blaine dropped his eyes.

"Please, Kurt! Don't do this. Can we please don't go there; can we talk about your feelings about starting public school again?"

"Nuuhuuu, not now. You're not wriggling your way out of this."

Blaine squirmed. He looked up at Kurt and then down again when he saw the determined look on his face.

"I need to... I can't do this." He said and shook his head and started backing away from the bed.

"Yes, yes you can." Kurt said but he didn't do anything to stop Blaine from moving from the bed, he could clearly see how uncomfortable this made him.

Blaine looked at Kurt and started moving around in the room.

"I have to go to the bathroom." He said after a while.

"Okay." Kurt said.

When Blaine had shut the door to the bathroom Kurt got up and took out the extra sedatives for him. Kurt wouldn't let this go, but he would make it as easy as possible. He didn't know what to think about Blaine's action. It surprised Kurt that he hadn't spoken to Hannah about it; Kurt had thought Blaine could speak to Hannah about everything.

When Blaine hadn't emerged after fifteen minutes, Kurt knocked on the door.

"Come on, honey. You can't hide in there."

It took another five minutes before Kurt heard the lock on the door click. He looked up when the door opened to reveal a pale, teary Blaine. Kurt immediately got up on his feet to embrace his fiancé.

"Oh, hon." He led the shaking boy to the bed and pressed the medicine and a glass of water in his hands. Blaine took it and swallowed without saying anything.

"Come here, sweets." Kurt said. He held out his arms and caught Blaine as he fell into his embrace.

Kurt held him until he felt the shaking subside. Blaine wasn't crying, this was the anxiety raging inside of him. It was rare, these explosions of anxiety in Blaine. Or, it was rare that it was evident on the outside. Kurt knew Blaine was still struggling with anxiety daily.

"Do you remember what Hannah says about anxiety? The only way to deal with it?" Kurt asked him.

He felt Blaine nod in his embrace.

"Say it." Kurt told him.

"I have to face it." Blaine whispered.

"Yes. You don't have to do this with me. I can ask Carole to come up here or we can call the ward if that feels better for you."

"No! Please don't leave me! Please don't!" Blaine said and sat up quickly.

"Ssh... No I won't, if you don't want me to, I'll never leave you. But then I want you to talk to me about this."

Blaine shrugged and looked at Kurt.

"Okay." He whispered after a short while.

"Good. I'll be here the whole time."

"Okay." Blaine whispered again.

"So, what are you scared of?"

Blaine sighed and ran his hands through his curly hair.

"I'm scared of..." Blaine looked up at Kurt who looked at him expectantly. He sighed but kept going.

"I'm scare of being bullied. I'm scare of not making friends. I'm scared of making friends. I'm afraid someone will push me, or touch me in some way and I'll have a flashback. I'm scared of failing school. I'm scared of being alone in a new school. I'm afraid of making a fool out of you. I'm scare of you seeing me in a different way and then breaking up with me."

It broke Kurt's heart hearing this, but he didn't stop him, he let him get it all out. This was obviously something Blaine needed to get out. Blaine didn't seem to notice the tears starting running down his cheeks and Kurt didn't wipe them off.

"I'm scared of falling asleep during class. I'm scared of going into the cafeteria for lunch and not knowing where to sit. I'm scared of not finding the classroom. I'm scared of..." Blaine's voice broke and he looked up at Kurt.

"I'm so scared, Kurt. So scared."

Kurt took his sobbing fiancé in his arms and let him cry. Kurt didn't notice his own cheeks becoming wet.

He heard a soft knock on the door and looked up to see Burt open it with a smile and a open mouth as if he was about to say something. Burt stopped at the door and took in the sight in front of him. He raised an eyebrow to his son who shook his head letting him know this wasn't something he could do anything about. Burt nodded and closed the door behind him.

Kurt returned his focus back on Blaine who still was sobbing in his embrace. Kurt rearranged them so they both were lying down on the bed and pulled the cover up. He held Blaine and let him cry. Kurt even let himself cry; about Blaine's fears and about his own fears. After half an hour their cries subsided and they looked at each other.

"I'm sorry." Blaine whispered.

"For what?" Kurt whispered back.

"I'm so weak."

"You're not weak. You're the bravest person I know."

"That's not true."

"It really is, but let's not focus on that right now."

"Okay. I know you wanna talk, but the medicine and the crying..."

"I need to nap too." Kurt interrupted him.

Blaine leaned and placed a light kiss on Kurt's forehead. Kurt's eyes fluttered shut and he didn't force them open. Blaine cuddled closer and closed his eyes.

A worried Burt came in to check on his sons ten minutes later and found them deep asleep under their covers.