NB: After reassessing the final chapters, I have decided to split 2 chapters now taking LITTLE VOICE from being a 16 chapter story to a 18 chapter one. So there is a little bit to go. Thank you again for your reviews and enthusiasm towards this piece...I appreciate you all.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Three days later
Slamming the driver door to the SUV, Rayna pushed her sunglasses on as she automatically lowered her eyes to avoid the aggressive lights of camera flashes.
"Talked to Teddy lately Rayna! Rayna!? Rayna!" Someone shouted from behind a camera, pressing the button furiously.
She winced as she found herself surrounded by paparazzi mercilessly imposing themselves on her. Blinded by the lights and the piercing questions, Rayna tried to cover her face as she made her way to the hotel entrance.
"Where's Deacon?! What does he think about the divorce? Rayna!"
"Are you dating Deacon now?"
"Is he why you and Teddy got a divorce?!"
"How's Teddy?! How are the kids?"
"Rayna, look over here. Over here!"
"Are you nervous about tonight? Think you can handle it?"
"Rayna! Rayna! Here! Here! Look here!"
Rayna ignored the obtrusive questions, adopting a cold and hard demeanour as she silently let herself crumble inside. She wanted them to all disappear, to leave her alone. The media had played a cruel game this past week, chasing her down in the hope of a photo or the chance that she would say something that could add fuel to their fire. Rayna had barely made it seven feet from her car, the overpowering wall of flashes refusing to let her through. Rayna panicked as she began to step back and forth insistently trying to find a way out.
"Y'all come on. You need to back up." She spoke firmly, holding her hands out in front of her to put distance between them. By the way the cameras continued to flash feverishly, she knew that her plea was a lost cause. Rayna shrieked, tripping over her feet when a man crashed into her with his camera.
"Hey!" Deacon bellowed, tearing through the sea of lights and flashes. Rayna's eyes shot up in search of the familiar voice, relief flooding her when she saw Deacon's face.
"Back off! Don't you touch her?!" He yelled as he shoved the man who had pushed her. Deacon pulled Rayna into his arms to shield her; she buried her head in his chest. "Hey?! Back off!"
A number of the photographers took a few steps back, startled by the venom in his voice. Others continued to attack them with questions.
"Are you dating?"
"So the rumours are true?"
"Deacon! Over here!"
"Hey! Look over here!"
"Get out of her face! I mean it! Move!" Deacon threatened, holding Rayna closer as they charged through the crowd to the hotel entrance.
"Y'all need to find someone else to terrorise." He muttered over his shoulder as he held open the glass door for Rayna.
Once inside, Rayna apprehensively removed herself from his side, shaking off the uneasiness that filled her. Deacon watched her closely, aware that the media attention was beginning to get the better of her.
"Thanks." She whispered uneasily, running her hand through her hair.
"For what?" He asked, pretending to be oblivious as he walked past her.
"You know what." She smiled, patting his shoulder as she followed him.
"Do I?" He replied, returning the smile. Deacon stopped at a vending machine, digging in his pocket for money.
Since the rehearsal, they had both silently resolved to not ask questions; content for the moments they shared to remain hidden away in a place just for them. A place where there were no expectations, no lies, no nothing, only she and him. Rayna hadn't expected Deacon to catch her when she fell, certain that he had given up on her. But he had proved her wrong, breaking down the walls of rejection she had slowly begun to build around herself. They had sat silently while he had held her anyway he could, dutifully protecting her from the troubles she refused to share. It was then that they both began to wonder where these moments would one day lead.
"Hungry?"
Rayna's eye's widened in disgust as she shook her head vehemently. "I feel like I'm about to be sick."
"Suit yourself." He shrugged, opening a packet of chips as he sat on the bottom step of the stairs in in the lobby. Rayna stood awkwardly as she tried to figure out if this was her cue to stay or go. Hesitantly, she sat beside him and rubbed her palms on her knees.
"It is not like you not to want these." Deacon coaxed, thrusting the chip packet in her face. Rayna pushed it away. "Please tell me you're not on one of those stupid diets that all the celebrities are going on, because that is just pathetic."
Rayna shot him a look, only to burst into laughter at the seriousness on his face. "I'm not one of those crazy dieters...no. I'm just…it doesn't matter."
"Come on, now you have to tell me."
"You're going think it's stupid." Rayna replied, playing with her hands.
"Try me." He replied, scrunching up the empty chip packet. Rayna nervously looked at him out of the corner of her eye as she pushed a loose strand of hair off her face.
"I'm scared." She admitted, tugging at her jeans.
"Scared?" He asked curiously.
"Terrified. I know I shouldn't believe what people are saying but what if I screw up? I can't do it. Deacon I'm gonna choke…I can't…maybe I shouldn't do this."
"Tonight's show?"
She nodded, fear causing her to tremble at the thought of forgetting the lyrics to her own songs. Her mind darted in all different directions as she recalled what had happened at her rehearsal. Deacon reached out for her hand, intertwining his fingers with hers to steady her shaking. Rayna reflexively went to pull away but he refused to let go.
"Come on." He said determinedly, pulling her to her feet.
"What? Where are we-"
"-Just trust me." He interrupted, dragging her through the lobby towards the entrance before stopping abruptly. Rayna crashed into him, causing him to sidestep.
"Maybe we should try the back door?" He asked, looking out the glass doors at the crowd of waiting photographers.
"Back door? Deacon where are we go-." Rayna replied, clinging to his jacket.
"-Come on." He smiled, ignoring her questions as he took her hand and headed for the back entrance.
- NASHVILLE -
"Deacon what are we doing?"
"Would you just shush?" Deacon replied, guiding her from behind as he covered her eyes. Rayna fought not to laugh at his tone and the way he led her. She found herself focusing on the way his body moved against hers, how his arms felt around her and the way his breath sat, hot on her neck. She had forgotten how it felt to be closer to him than the impressions of him her dreams. Rayna shivered, squirming to loosen his grip. He refused to release his hold, smiling as he recognised that she was feeling what he was.
"Ok there are stairs here. Ready?"
"This'd be a whole lot easier if you just let me open my eye-" She argued.
"-No! Not yet."
"Deacon, I swear if you don't take your hands off my ey-"
"-Now." He whispered, removing his hands.
Rayna squinted as her eyes adjusted to the stage lights and slowly spun around, taking in her surroundings. They stood alone in the middle of the stage in the empty arena. Silence ringing in her ears, she struggled to understand why Deacon had brought her here.
"Why are we here?" Rayna whispered, turning to look at him. Deacon stepped towards her and tentatively reached out for her hand.
"We're here because you need to remember."
"I need to remember?"
"Sit down." Deacon replied, patting the empty space next to him as he took a seat on the stage floor. Rayna sat cross-legged and looked at him sceptically as she waited for an explanation.
"Now what?"
"You're scared because you are second guessing something that shouldn't be second guessed." He spoke, looking out into the unlit arena. She looked curiously at him. "You're second guessing you."
"No I'm not." She lied, trying to meet his gaze. Deacon's eyes widened, telling her he wasn't buying it. "Do you remember the first time-?"
"-At the Bluebird?" Rayna interrupted him. He smiled at her impatience, before continuing on with what he had begun to say.
"At the Bluebird when we sang together. Ray, people weren't there to listen to me; they were there to listen to you…that night you had the whole room captivated the moment you opened your mouth…and you've kept doing that up to this day."
Rayna pulled her knees up to her chest and thought about what he had said. She blushed when she caught him staring. They both quickly averted their eyes; shaking the inner exhilaration they were experiencing.
"You've always said your passion for music comes from being able to share a story, to share who you were with people. This is that exactly. You, the stage, the lights, the people and your songs. You are made to do this." He pressed, shifting his body so he faced her.
"What if I choke." Rayna replied, her voice full of shame.
"You won't."
"You don't know that."
"You won't because you're going to practise right now...with me." He said certainly, looking her in the eye. Rayna shot him an unbelieving look. Ignoring her, Deacon stood.
"Sing to me."
"No." She replied flatly as she stubbornly remained seated. Deacon smirked, crossing his arms.
"For once why don't you get down off your high heels, you're no big deal can't you see?" He sung spontaneously, not once taking his eyes off her. Rayna shuddered as his voice pierced the stillness, red colouring her cheeks when she recognised the lyrics. Out of all the songs to choose from, he would choose that one. Suddenly she wasn't feeling so frightened about the show, confidence sparking a flame within that encouraged her to join Deacon.
"I know why you're lonely. It's time you knew it too." They sung together as Rayna stood to stand in front of him. "No one will ever love you. No one will ever love you. No one will ever love you…like I do."
"Like I do." He sung, holding out his hand to her.
"Like I do." She sung, intertwining her fingers with his.
Slipping into silence, the mood changed as their hands denied them the right to let go. Staring at their fingers, Rayna blushed as she thought about how their hearts had taken the moment's innocence and turned it into unspoken desire. Deacon smiled knowingly, catching her eyes when she looked up.
"If you choke…remember this." He grinned, leaning his forehead against hers. Rayna nodded, her forehead still rested on his. Gently, he let his thumbs brush her cheeks as he looked into her eyes, slowly stepping towards her.
Instantaneously, one after the other, the house lights in the arena began to flicker on causing Deacon and Rayna to promptly step apart. A number of crewmembers began to file in from different entrances.
"Rayna! There you are!" Bucky called, walking up the steps onto the stage. "Liam's been trying to get a hold of you about last minute set changes? Or something along those lines."
"Sorry, I've been." She replied, shoving her hands into her pockets as she tried to shake her giddiness. "busy." She mumbled, looking away in Deacon's direction.
"Well the shows in less than four hours away so I suggest you find him." Bucky replied, looking over her shoulder curiously at Deacon as he silently walked off the stage. "What is going on here?"
"What are you talking about?"
"With Deacon?"
"Nothing is going on with Deacon." Rayna squeaked, immediately irritated at the unevenness in her voice. Bucky looked at her sceptically. "Why?"
"People are talking."
"People are talking? Don't tell me you're actually listening to the gossip?" Rayna scoffed, crossing her arms.
"Rayna I'm serious." Bucky replied evenly.
"And I really need to find Liam before the show. Thanks Buck!" She smiled, ignoring his comments as she ran down the stage stairs.
- NASHVILLE -
"Thank you Chicago!" Rayna shouted, waving her hands above her head as she and Liam walked off the stage. Buzzing from the adrenaline that came with finishing a show, Rayna skipped down the stairs. She hadn't missed one single beat tonight, holding the arena in the palm of her hand as she sang song after song. Rayna wanted to find Deacon so she could thank him for believing in her when she had doubted herself. There was something about the small and insignificant things, like being sung to in an empty arena or protected from paparazzi that excited her and made her feel like she was discovering who Deacon was all over again. Giggly, Rayna shot Bucky a confused look when he stepped in front of her.
"You may want to dial it back?" Bucky greeted subtly.
"What?"
"Just remember to breathe ok...I'll be right over hear if you need me." He continued, squeezing her arm lightly before stepping out of her way. Rayna turned to look at him, waiting for an explanation to his cryptic comments.
"Rayna." A deep, smooth voice greeted her. She froze, immediately recognising the voice.
"What are you doing here?" She whispered, not looking behind her to see who had spoken.
"Well that's no way to greet your Father." Lamar grinned, stepping towards her. Rayna turned around to face him, forcing her knees not to give way when she saw Teddy standing next to him.
"I thought I told you to leave." She hissed, glaring at Teddy. "Instead, you take the girls home and come back with Daddy? Really?"
"Rayna, I'm he-" Teddy started.
"-Teddy I've got this." Lamar interrupted, silencing Teddy as he raised a hand. Rayna fidgeted as she caught a number of people slowing their pace to catch their conversation.
"Do you think it is really wise to be gallivanting across the world on an arena tour when you have a family at home that is in desperate need of you?" Lamar continued.
"My family is none of your business." She breathed.
"It is when it involves the divorce of Nashville's highest profile couple being publicised in every magazine and newspaper."
"No it's not actually." She pressed, crossing her arms.
"What will happen when the magazines and newspapers catch onto the real paternity of little Maddie?" He asked, smiling when he saw the shock on her face. "I assume that would be quite an ugly way for that information to be discovered?"
"I swear Teddy, if you have done something as nasty as going to the tabloids about this, I will-" Rayna breathed, anger in her eyes.
"-I haven't." He replied.
"You have the opportunity to save both Maddie and Deacon the heartache if you just come home and start things over." Lamar spoke, looking his daughter in the eyes.
"Are you crazy Daddy? I'm not coming home, especially with either of you!" She exclaimed.
"So I take it he doesn't know?" Teddy mumbled, ramming his hands into his pockets.
"Why would you say that?" Rayna replied impatiently.
"Because if he did, he would want out of this tour quicker than you could ever imagine. And since I saw his name on a door back there, I can only assume he doesn't know." Lamar answered merrily. "There is nothing worse than being lied to."
"You have no idea." She replied, staring at both men coldly.
"Rayna you are skating on thin ice. It won't be long till it breaks." Lamar warned, smiling at people walking past. "There's still time to come home, to make things work."
Rayna shook her head in bewilderment at their attempts to blackmail her into second guessing her judgement about what she wanted for her future. Teddy stopped her dead in her tracks.
"I meant what I said Rayna, I have nothing to lose anymore. Deacon deserves to know the truth. You tell him, or I will." He said firmly, standing a little straighter. Rayna stepped closer to them, lowering her voice so that she was loud enough to only be heard by them.
"The thought that either of you are willing to use Maddie as a bargaining chip in your own twisted game is beyond me...I refuse to play…you cannot keep threatening me with this…I'm done."
"Rayn-" Teddy started.
"-I trust you can see yourselves out?" She spat, turning on her heel to walk away.
Storming off, Rayna desperately tried to shake the uneasiness that was relentlessly trying to stay put. Wrapping her arms around herself, she wrestled with her heart as she lost it to thoughts about Deacon.