Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

"I'm a bloody prisoner in own home,"Mr. Gold muttered bitterly.

It was once again ladies night for Belle and her friends, and they'd chosen hold it at his house. He was now trapped upstairs in a house full of women. He should have stayed at the shop later. Gold sighed and dried his hair with a towel. He'd just finished taking a nice hot shower, and all he wanted to do now was relax. By the time he woke up in the morning, they'd all be gone. However, things do not always go as planned.

Gold stood at the bathroom sink and opened the cabinet above it only to find that his pills were missing, and only one person would know where there were. However, Belle was currently downstairs surrounded by women that did not particularly care for him. He weighed his options. Option A was to walk into the lion's den and get Belle. Option B was to skip the pills and pray that the pain in his leg went away. Option B was the safest one, but he knew from experience that the pain was not going away on its own. With another heavy sigh, Gold dried his hair again as best he could before heading downstairs.

Oblivious to her husband's plight, Belle was currently dealing with her own problem, and it came in the form of a young woman in red. She'd been suckered into a game thought up by Emma that involved guessing what was in the underwear drawer of the men in Storybrook.

"I'm telling you, David wears boxers,"Ruby said."MM, back me up."

Mary Margret blushed."I've never seen his underwear drawer, thank you. I have no idea."

"Well, Thomas wears briefs, and he loves them,"Ashley said, taking the attention off of Mary Margret.

"I always pegged hm for a tighty whitie man,"Emma said.

"I did too,"Ruby agreed."Annie, do you have anything to add?

"What now? I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Answer the question, Annie."

The girl in question blushed like mad and refused to answer."What question is that?"

"You know damn well what question,"Ruby said."Gold. Boxers or briefs?"

"It's actually neither, dearie. Underwear can be very uncomfortable to me sometimes."

Every female in the room froze. For Ashley and Mary Margret, it was mostly due to the shock of hearing the voice come from the stairs. For Emma and Ruby, it was because of the answer. Belle's had been caused by both. Their shock only increased when they looked at the man who had spoken. Mr. Gold stepped into the room in silk pajama pants with the shirt left open, still wet from his shower. Cane in hand, he went over to Belle as if nothing was wrong.

"May I see you in the kitchen for a second, love?"

Belle snapped out of her stupor and quickly got up. She then began pushing her husband toward the kitchen, careful not to step on Draco. Once inside, Gold received a slap to the back of his head.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"For answering that question. Did you really have to say that?"

"Well, you obviously weren't going to answer her,"he replied, rubbing his head."I was only telling the truth."

Belle put her head in her hands."Have you no shame?"

"Not one bit."

She had the feeling he was going say that."Did you come down for a reason, or are you just here to mentally scar a few young women?"

"A bit of both, actually. I came down to ask you where my pills are when I heard you lovely ladies having the most interesting conversation."

He was grinning at her now, and she kept glaring at him."Must you be an ass this late in the day?"

"Not, but it's so rare that I get an opportunity to annoy The Coven."

Belle sighed. Due to their mutual dislike for each other, Gold had dubbed Ruby, Emma, Ashley, and Mary Margret The Coven."Rum, for the hundredth time, they're not witches. They're my friends."

"Who said anything about witches? Those women are obviously vampires. Evil fiends that will drain the life out of a man, and the one in red is their leader."

"Rum! Ruby is not-Oh forget it. You were talking about your pills."Maybe if he took them, he'd stop.

"Yes. They're not in the bathroom."

"Check the nightstand drawer. I put them there because you keep knocking them off of the stand and they would roll under the bed."

"Thanks you, dearie."Gold stepped forward and put his arms around her waist, drawing her to him."I'd be lost without you, you know."

Belle finally smiled and ran her hand through his still damp hair."I know. I'll be up in a minute. Go on to sleep."

He smiled and gave her a quick kiss before exiting the kitchen. Once outside, he pretend to fix his pants.

"We'll finish this later, dearie!"he called out loud enough for all of them to hear.

He then headed back to up the stairs before Belle could murder him. He knew he'd be in trouble in the morning, but the look on their faces was worth it.

TBC

Sorry for the lateness. School starts up again soon, and I've been busy getting ready. This also means that I'll probably be posting chapters less frequently. Again, sorry.