Chapter 31
Castiel watched Dean pace across the motel room. The group of ragtag hunters had disbanded with the threat of monster take-over no longer on the horizon, and aside from Shawn, Dean had made no promises to keep in touch. It was hard to lead a group when he could hardly keep his family together.
It had been two days since the Rexpoint battle and Dean has barely spoken to Castiel. Cas understood that he was upset that Sam had dropped off the radar and that things have gone from bad to worse for the brothers, but Castiel was growing tired of waiting. They needed to talk about this and Dean was shutting him out. Again. Castiel contemplated leaving. He loved Dean but there was so many other places where he could be of more use.
Watching the hunter pace, Castiel reached out to him with soothing mental images and the longing to comfort him. His efforts met with a brick wall.
"Stop it, Cas," Dean said curtly.
"Can we talk about this?" Castiel offered and Dean turned to glare at him.
"Oh, so you're ready to tell me who this angel is that has my brother by the balls?" Castiel winced. That was the one thing Dean had asked him after they got into his car and took off in no particular direction, but Castiel was reluctant to answer him.
"I... think we should talk to Eros," the angel said softly and Dean scoffed.
"Fine. Bring the fucker here so I can rip his head off."
"Dean..."
"No!" Dean shouted and whirled on Cas. He jabbed a finger at the angel while he spoke. "He is the reason for all of this. I don't care that Sam agreed, no person should have this much power. Not even my brother. And now he's sharing his brain with an angel again."
"Eros made a lot of mistakes," Castiel said cautiously, "but so have I. So have we all. And he's my brother."
"Yeah, they are all your brothers and sisters, Cas."
"Eros is different." Rising to his feet, Castiel crossed the room to where Dean stood and slipped his hands around the hunter's waist. "Every angel I have ever known has tried to betray me. Except Eros. He's truly my brother, Dean." Dean met his gaze for a moment and then ducked his head to look away.
"If you want to call him here then call him here," he resigned to agree upon.
"And you won't rip his head off?" Castiel asked, and Dean rolled his eyes. Tightening his grip, Castiel pulled the hunter closer to him and softly kissed his pouted lips. They had not been affectionate since just after the battle and the act seemed almost alien to Cas.
After a moment, Dean softened under his touch and returned the kiss with a growing heat that Castiel felt deep inside his core. While his Grace was a tidal wave navigated by ebb and flow, Castiel continued to struggle to control it when blinded by these serious bouts of passion from Dean. It was embarrassing that he was so hindered from more intense love making with his Soul-bound.
Dean's lips parted and the kiss intensified causing Castiel's Grace to swell. He needed to find a way to control it and not drink in so much of Dean's emotions or otherwise his Grace will overcome his vessel and burn the human body to a crisp.
"Cas..." Dean whispered against his lips, all his previous hardness washed away, and Castiel's Grace hummed. He moaned softly from the pleasure of it and Dean shifted his attention to kissing the hollow at the base of Castiel's neck. Fighting, struggling, wrestling with his Grace, Castiel pushed the essence of Dean's soul away, and the fire inside him abated just a little bit. Castiel refused to hurt Dean again like he did before. He wanted to pleasure Dean, and excite him, but it seemed the more excited Dean got, the more excited Castiel got, and then Dean would suddenly be whipped by tendrils of Grace in the throes of Castiel's passion. They hadn't even tried to let Dean reciprocate yet. The whole endeavor was frustratingly slow.
Cas steadied his breath, trying to hold himself back, and began to lower himself to his knees. Halfway down, Dean put his hands under Castiel's arms and pulled him back up.
"No, not that. Not tonight," Dean said with a deep throaty voice that only came out during sex. Dean led Castiel towards the bed and Cas eyed it warily. Was Dean trying to get him to go further than he was safe to go? Castiel reeled in his Grace as best he could, and followed Dean's lead. He trusted Dean in all things, including this.
Dean pulled Cas's jacket off and his tie, tossing them on the floor. Being more aware of the elements with his sensations, Castiel wore his trench coat less and less. Although, he has always been fond of it. He had carried and needed that coat through so many trials, and in those dark days when he forgot who he was, Dean carried it for him.
Distracted by thoughts of his attire, Cas was caught off guard when Dean sat at the edge of the bed, pulled the angel's shirt away from his belly and nipped at the tender flesh there. Castiel gasped and wrestled his Grace back into submission. Sex with a human was like wrestling a tornado. Castiel always had to be on guard not to overwhelm himself with too much sensation. He was eternally grateful to Eros for this gift he was given, and thus far it seemed to be holding fast, but it was not without its obstacles.
"Quit spacing out," Dean whispered against Castiel's stomach as his hands slid under the length of his shirt. Castiel worked at his buttons and desperately tried to ignore the enticing pull of Dean's overly aroused soul.
"I'm trying Dean," Cas said breathily, "it's so hard."
"Thinking about baseball?" Dean looked up and smiled which made Castiel feel like he was melting inside. He slipped out of his shirt, and Dean's hands explored the length of his chest and back causing Cas to shiver in delight.
"I don't understand... what baseball has to do with anything." His breaths were coming more quickly and Castiel clawed at tranquility. Under the stiff cut if his dress pants, his cock swelled to rigidity. This was going to end badly. No matter how hard he tried, it always did. Dean's hands slid over Castiel's chest and fingertips played at his hardened nipples. Castiel groaned from the delightful sensation and Dean paused.
"Cas, you gotta calm down man." Cas closed his eyes and forced his breathing to steady out. His hands twitched at his sides, yearning to reach out and touch Dean, but he stilled them to tranquility. Dean's fingers slid into the front of his pants and undid belt, button, and zipper. Castiel held his breath and his hands balled into fists. He squeezed his eyes tight. He had to stay calm.
Reaching into his boxers, Dean pulled at Castiel's cock, and brought it out into the cool air. Feeling Dean's fingers on his shaft was like electricity and he sucked air sharply through his teeth. Dean had never tried this before.
"Stay calm," the hunter whispered and slowly his fingers traced along the head of Castiel's dick. The angel had not realized until that moment just how sensitive his skin really was. He felt dizzy from the touch and whimpered as he rested his hands on Dean's shoulders.
"Dean..."
"Shh," Dean said softly and suddenly Castiel could feel the moist heat of Dean's breath against his skin. He gasped again, breaths hitching in his burning lungs, and his fingers tightened on the hunter's skin.
"Be calm..." Castiel whispered, "must be calm..." Dean groaned deep in his throat and suddenly Castiel was in his mouth. Hot breath played against the angel's skin and Castiel shuddered.
"Dean... don't stop. Oh it feels... so good..." No matter how hard he tried, his breaths wouldn't slow. His Grace clawed at its confines, trying to reach out and consume the raging desire emanating from Dean but Castiel managed to keep it bay. Barely.
Dean worked Castiel into his mouth, twisting and sucking, and Castiel shuddered from the contact.
"Dean...Dean..." his hands shook from the restraint. His body shook from the pleasure. "Please... I'm..." Suddenly a spasm of ecstasy wracked Castiel's body and the last grip he had to contain his Grace collapsed. Tendrils of fiery energy burst forth from his body and Dean quickly twisted around in the bed in front of him. Castiel moaned loudly at the release as both semen and Grace emptied from him in cascading waves of pleasure.
His Grace absorbed the passion of Dean's arousal like a sponge and swelled to three times its size. Unable to contain such an amount, Cas balled the energy and thrust it into the sky outside their room where it burst into a firework of gold brilliance. Beside them the motel window shattered.
Realization flooded back to him along with the horror of what he had done.
"Dean!" He cried out as he looked over the charred surface of the bed. With his Grace abated and able to be pulled back into his vessel, the light of the room dimmed around him and it took a second for his human eyes to adjust. For one horrible moment, Castiel thought he burned Dean. But then he saw movement of the scorched comforter and Dean's face re-emerged from where he had been hiding.
"Cas, you really need to get that shit under control," Dean said with a half grin.
"Dean, I am so sorry. I am so so sorry," Castiel felt utterly humiliated with his lack of self-control. His body was just so sensitive and the sensations so incredible it was hard not to lose oneself in it. His face burned hot as he hurriedly dressed himself.
"Hey," Dean said gently and got to his feet. He pulled Castiel towards him and into a long kiss. "It's alright, I didn't get hurt. Don't get upset." He enveloped Castiel into an embrace and the angel welcomed the warmth of him. Dean spoke again hesitantly. "I...I never did that before. I take it that I did alright?"
"It was phenomenal" Castiel said while he closed his eyes to reminisce the sensation. Up to this point, since Castiel had taken Eros's potion, Cas had only been able to pleasure Dean. Any amount of physical attention returned seemed to overwhelm the senses and he lost control right away. So at least he could say that they have made progress. "You are so amazing, Dean Winchester."
"I...I really enjoyed that. Well, at least until the end," Dean said sheepishly, "maybe when we talk to your brother we could ask-"
"No."
"I'm just saying that-"
"Dean, I'm not going to ask for sex advice from my little brother!" Cas said, exasperated, and Dean gave him a crooked smile.
"Well I guess not when you say it that way."
"Besides, when I bring Eros here it will be to talk about Sam. I am pretty sure the angel Grace has found a way to merge with your brother's soul, and I don't know what that means for Sam." Dean's face grew hard.
"Yeah. Let's talk to him about that. Right after we clean up this motel room. I can't afford to keep paying your incidentals." The blush on Castiel's face only darkened.