Being Arizona

Hey guys, so I realised I didn't make it very clear what the point of this story is. Grey's is great, the actors portray the characters brilliantly, and Shonda is amazing. But one thing I hate about films and TV shows is that you never actually see what's going on inside a character's head, or their chain of thought that lead to different things. We can only guess. So, this is basically what I think goes on.

I stared down at the flat cardboard box in my hands, taking in the bright colours before glancing back up at the door of apartment 502, not sure of what I would be met with. Callie's moods had gone from overly sarcastic to angry to crying over the past few days, and I hadn't spoked to her yet so I wasn't' sure what was awaiting me.

George O'Malley had died. It was horrible. He'd jumped in front of a bus to save a woman he hardly knew, and the bus hadn't noticed him and had dragged him twenty feet before even noticing him. It was hard on everyone in the hospital. His organs had been donated- they'd actually asked Callie to make the decision about it, but she couldn't do it because according to her even thought they were married, she was never the most important person in his life. Izzie was, and it was Izzie who made the call.

Callie was really upset. Meredith Grey had asked me if I was concerned at how upset she was getting over this, but I wasn't. I totally understood. He was her ex-husband, she had loved him. A part of her was always going to love him, but it wasn't enough to be with him. George had been a great surgeon- I'd worked with him all of two times, but he definitely showed potential, even if it wasn't as obvious as with the others. If I was overwhelmed at how much things had changed just since I'd arrived here, then it was impossible to imagine how it must be for her.

"Calliope?" I called out into the quiet apartment, setting the box of donuts down on the coffee table and proceeding into the apartment. I couldn't hear or see anyone or anything so I continued through to the bedroom to see Callie sitting there reading a book, although her eyes remained glued to the same spot so I could tell she wasn't taking any of it in. "Calliope." I said to get her attention, lying down on the bed beside her and wrapping my arm around her shoulders.

She jumped a little then smiled down at me. "You gave me a fright." She said, kissing me softly and setting the book down.

"How was your day? I barely saw you." I asked her, laying my head down on her shoulder.

"Um… You might go mad if I tell you." She said unsurely, beginning to chew her nail which was a nervous habit of hers. I lifted my head and gave her a closer look.

"Tell me, Callie." I said, not caring for all of this putting off crap.

"Well, I kiiiinda, maaaaybe, sooorta, yelled at the chief then got fired and now I got a job at Mercy West and he also announced the merger which means I'm probably gonna get fired again." She said at top speed, and I was only just able to make out what she said, but when my brain caught up I frowned.

"Why did you yell at the chief?" I asked, finding the thought of it amusing. The chief was very laid back and calm so it was hard to imagine someone yelling at him.

"He said I pretty much had a secured fellowship here, and then Chang decided to put off his retirement so guess what that means?" She fumed. "So then I got really pissed and told him that I was a superstar with a scalpel and that he would regret it." She finished.

"Well, you are a super star. You're great. And you might like working at Mercy West. And maybe Webber won't fire you again." I tried to convince her, but she was having none of it.

"Yeah, whatever." She muttered, making me sigh. I'm guessing that there was no way to lift her spirits.

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"Doctor Arizona's here!" Six year old Emily yelled in excitement when I entered the room. Emily had stage three lung cancer and was here for her next round of chemo, which was apparently side effect free so far. She'd been my patient ever since I got here and she and her parents were becoming friends of mine quickly. Today, I brought good news.

"Hey Em! Where are your mom and dad?" I asked, looking around but seeing no sign of them. I did see lots of Disney movies and stacks of different children's books, but no parents in sight.

"Mommy's in the bathroom and Daddy's in the cafeteria. He doesn't like the food here but I like the pudding." She said pointing to the door of the joined bathroom which as if on cue opened to reveal Mrs. Harris.

"Arizona, hi!" She greeted me. One thing about this family is that they were all very cheery. Like unusually cheery. I guess just like me then, according to others.

"Where's Andrew?" I asked, because this was news that I really needed to tell them together.

"Right here!" A voice said behind me and I jumped and turned around to see Andrew standing with a chocolate pudding cup and a smile.

"I have good news!" I announced, pulling Emily's charts from the file and holding them up. "The cancer's going away!" I exclaimed cheerfully. It had been about a month since I'd started to see difference, but I hadn't wanted to say anything. However, it had been a month and it showed no signs of stopping so I think it was safe to inform them.

For the rest of the day I had a relatively good day, everyone seemed as happy as they could be when they were getting surgery, and there were several good outcomes on surgeries I performed. Just an overall good day and I planned to take Callie for drinks when my shift finished to celebrate. In peds, it was nearly every day that you encountered hard questions or tough moments, but you just had to push through them because the next kids was always waiting.

"So what do you think about this merger?" I asked Callie and Mark as I sipped at a red wine. Very sophisticated, I know. But I had work tomorrow so I wasn't here to go nuts.

"Hate it." Callie grumbled as she took a drink, glaring at her half empty glass.

"Can't say I love it." Mark added.

"It's worse for the residents though, since there's gonna be lots more of them." I chipped in.

"You guys are both ranked as some of the best surgeons in the US, though, I'm just a nobody so they won't care about me." Callie sulked which made me laugh. She was in the process of making cartilage from scratch, for goodness sake!

"Don't be stupid, silly girl, you're amazing." I smiled, kissing her hand which was in mine. She smiled back at me and kissed my forehead in return.

Mark made a face similar to a five year old's. "Ew, get a room."

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Hey guys, sorry it was shorter! But I'm currently writing the last chapter for my other fic, You can call it Home, so if you wanna read that then go ahead!

Happy Existing!