Hey! Lots of emotion, so get ready Ladies/Gentlemen!

"But- But I- You were…" he covered his mouth with his hand as he looked at me, really looked at me, and I saw tears in his eyes. Mello never, ever cried. "What happened to you?" his voice was husky.

"You left." He flinched and ran his hands through his hair, looking down. "I'm here to tell you that I'm going to be dead tomorrow." His head snapped up, his eyes even wider.

"W-what? WHY?" He exclaimed, stumbling towards me a bit. I lifted my chin, attempting to look powerful.

"I don't want to live anymore. So tomorrow, I'm going to kill myself. I just thought you would want to know." Mello looked completely distraught, and he blinked a few times, tears rolling down his face.

"But- why?" he looked into my eyes, moving closer to take my goggles off. He touched my face, tracing my cheekbones and collarbone. "You're so thin… What did you do Matty?"

"Don't call me that." For the first time in a long time, my voice had emotion, even if it was just exhaustion. I weakly pushed his hand away, but I barely had any effect on him. Something clicked in his head, and his voice took on a more desperate tone.

"Wait, you're going to kill yourself? You can't do that Matt! You can't!" And in that moment, with all the emotion in Mello's eyes, with the tears streaking his face, with all the hurt I had bottled up for four years, and with the sheer impossibility of being here, with him, I broke. I stood, shoving him away, and stormed as forcefully as I could to the nearest table, screaming,

"DON'T YOU GET IT?" I started panting from the physical effort it took to be that loud, but I had to be that loud. He had to hear me God damn it! "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND? YOU TORE ME APART! YOU BROKE ME MELLO! FUCKING HELL, I'VE NEVER BEEN SO ALONE IN MY LIFE! EVERYTHING, AND I MEAN EVERYTHING I DID REMINDED ME OF YOU! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH IT HURT? DID YOU KNOW THAT I CAN'T DO ANYTHING WITHOUT WANTING TO CUT NOW?" he flinched again at those words, his eyes flicking to my wrists. I staggered overt to him, tired now, but full of adrenaline. I held out my wrists, still hidden by my shirt and shouted, "I'VE NEVER HURT SO MUCH IN MY LIFE AND IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF YOU! HOW DID YOU EXPECT ME TO GO ON? DID YOU REALLY THINK A TINY LITTLE NOTE SAYING "Oh, it was the only way, boo hoo!" COULD MAKE IT BETTER?" I looked away and allowed myself some time to sob. Once I could talk again, I turned on him, wiping my tears and pointed a bony finger at him. "IT DIDN'T! It didn't fix anything!" He was gasping, trying to get control of his sobs.

"But- I thought you would move on, get someone else, someone better. You could have had anyone, Matt. Anyone would have wanted you. You could have done Near if you wanted to! Maybe even get into girls…" I laughed without humor.

"For someone so smart, you really can be clueless. Don't you see? I still love you." He was covering his mouth again, crying freely. Seeing him like that made me break into tears again, but I had to get it straight. He needed to know. "I still love you! And I'll always love you, even after it's done. Even when I finally end this. Even when the sun gets too close to Earth, billions of years from now, and the whole world gets obliterated, I will still love you, Mihael Keehl." He took his hand away and whimpered,

"M-matty…"

"But I guess that's not enough anymore, huh? 'I love you' won't cut it, because you don't love me back." I turned, ready to leave, but he grabbed my hand and pulled me back. I fell against him easily, being so light, and Mello took me in his arms gently, stroking my hair like he used to. "Mello…?" he was sobbing, actually sobbing, with the noises and everything, as he held me.

"God, Matt, I'll explain everything. I promise. Right here, right now." He breathed deeply for a moment, and continued talking, his voice low and breathy in my ear. "I'm in the Mafia. I'm pretty much the leader." I pulled away to look at him, surprised. "It was a good way to know everything. Anyways, I left you behind because I didn't want you to get hurt-" his voice cracked and he held my face again. "But that obviously didn't work." He caught his breath. "I had my bags packed-" we looked over at the suitcase on his bed. "because I was coming back to get you. I missed you so much Matty. I never forgot you." He took his hands away and un-zipped his vest, reaching into a small pocket hidden inside. "I always had something to remember you by." He pulled out a piece of paper and handed it to me. It was a picture we had taken with a cheap thow-away camera of me and him on our bed. He was shirtless, and I was snuggled up to him, holding the camera. He was flipping the camera off, sticking his tongue out, and I was laughing. We looked so happy. The photo brought back memories, and I smiled faintly, my first smile in four years. We had bought the camera and spent the day taking pictures of each other in ridiculous poses, trying to be models. I looked up at him, my chest hurting.

"You still have this? And you carry it around with you?" I asked, holding the picture up. He smiled, relieved, and wrapped his arms around my barely-there waist.

"I would never have it anywhere else." He pulled me closer, looking up so we were face-to-face. "I love you, Mail Jeevas. I never stopped loving you. I shouldn't have left you, baby. I'm so, so, so sorry. Will you ever forgive me?" I leaned down and burrowed my face against his chest, breathing in the scent of him, of my Mello.

"Of course. I'm sorry for yelling. I never really blamed you, I was just weak."

"I shouldn't have done that to you. It was better that you got it all out." He pulled away and held my face again, looking at me. "You really need to gain some weight. You look like a skeleton." I smiled at him, just barely, and asked in a whisper,

"Does the skeleton get a kiss?" he smiled back, warm and full of love.

And the skeleton got a kiss.

Back to fluff next chapter, no more depressing stuff, I promise!

Mello POV next too! I like being Mello sometimes. :3