Author's Notes: I cannot reiterate enough, how grateful I am for all the continued support. School has kept me from responding to PM's and reviews but just know I see each and every one of them and I am so very grateful. A special thanks to Roni for the Beta and lonstanissima.
Chapter 13
Here Comes The Rain Again
Rain struck heavily against the cabin's roof, light illuminated the sky and thunder roared only seconds later. The sound pulled them both out of their haze. She noticed Andy's jaw clench before he looked back at the heavy rain as a second clap of thunder was heard. Sharon was at a loss for words, but she could see he was considering leaving. A step forward and her stomach knotted at the thought of him preferring the rain over speaking to her.
"Andy?" She called hesitantly. When he turned to look at her, his brown eyes reflected every ounce of confusion and pain hers held. Yet there was something deeper and more meaningful in his gaze, like he was coming to some sort of conclusion. For a moment it looked like he was going to say something, but decided against it. Then it hit her, he was trying to find the right words to excuse himself. "You'll catch a cold, if you just stand there." She heard herself say. The smallest and most hesitant smile appeared on her lips. As she reached to open the door a little wider, she noticed he was drenched from head to toe. He moved inside awkwardly, his bag hanging from his shoulder.
Sharon self-consciously ran her fingers through her hair. His heart beat quicker as she offered one of those beautiful smiles that always made him lose his bearings.
"You with someone?" His voice was rough and startling. Sharon frowned, looking at him with sincere confusion. "Someone is in the shower," he pointed towards the sound of running water nearly rolling his eyes. "Look, I don't know what happened here. But I don't want to interrupt." Sharon turned to face the bathroom, where the water was still running for her bath. When she turned back to face him, he was getting ready to leave again.
Sharon closed her eyes for a moment, realizing for the first time how quickly her heart was pounding. Typically, she would be in total control of her emotions, but she realized that when she needed it the most, she was unsuccessful. When she was face to face with him, all rational thought was lost. She breathed in, reached for the strap of his bag and tugged softly to stop him.
"It's just me." She whispered. He looked at her green eyes shining up at him as she closed the door with her free hand. There was no way she would let him leave; that was the only thought that floated through her mind. "Let me get you a towel, so you can dry off." He released his bag under her pull. She took it with her, dropping it softly on the floor near the bed several feet away from him.
He looked around the quaint cabin and ran his hands over his face letting out a noise of frustration. The sound of a filling tub ended and he scolded himself internally for having a moment of jealousy. It was irrational and he had no right. He should have known what Provenza was doing. It was obvious he had planned it with the kid, who had probably gotten his instructions from Abby. There was no doubt it was a setup, one Sharon was probably trying to find her way out of. He gazed down at the puddle he was making and then a white towel appeared in his line of vision. He looked up, but quickly turned away from the warm smile she was trying to offer and took the towel with a soft thank you. He didn't want to think too hard about how her fingers were trembling, he could come up with many scenarios, but he knew the real reason was not what he hoped for.
His eyes landed on the rare sight of skinny jeans and he stared intently at the shape of her hips. Sharon's breath caught in her throat as she noticed his gaze traveling over her body. Andy dragged his eyes up to meet hers. Neither one said anything, but the warm look they gave each other spoke louder than words ever could. The tension was palpable, they both wanted to reach out and hold one another. Neither one was brave enough.
"I think Abby set this…" She began, trying to not get too lost in his gaze.
"Yeah." Andy said roughly, but winced at his own words. He ran the towel over his face. "I know this wasn't you." He wiped the back of his neck, not noticing the way she took a step back and slipped her hands into her jeans pockets. He really was pushing her away. It brought an uneasiness over her and an uncertainty she wasn't used to having around him. "I don't want to wet the rest of the place. If you can, please," he looked up and pointed at his bag. "So I can go."
Her arms lowered at her sides. A veil of sadness came upon her. "You don't have to." She voiced meekly.
His eyes moved from the bag to her. She could see his genuine surprise by the wide eyed expression he was giving her. If Abby had set this up, then maybe Sharon knew everything they had talked about at that café. Shit, she would surely run. He needed to reiterate everything he had told her in the breakroom. "Sharon, I don't know what Abigail told you, but…" She immediately noticed how uncomfortable he looked.
Quickly she shook her head. If she was curious what he had talked to her sister about, she didn't show it.
"She didn't tell me a thing, Andy." She took a step forward, but stopped. "This is about me. Not you." She looked around the cabin away from him when she heard her own voice crack. "At least wait till the rain dies down, it's dangerous going back down in this weather." He watched her walk over to the fireplace, she was trying to avoid him. It was something he learned about her. When she got emotional, she busied herself with something else. He listened to the clicking sound of the lighter and the hiss under her breath.
Andy glanced in her direction, he couldn't stop himself from admiring how gorgeous she looked in her casual outfit, jeans and black t-shirt. He wished this had been more than a mistake or a setup. That being together in this cabin was Sharon's choice. It may possibly be the first and last time they would be in a place this intimate together. He was grateful with Abby's doing for a moment, to be given the chance to look at her freely, admire how breathtaking she was. He looked through the window, noticed the rain wasn't settling and sighed. Sharon would insist he stay until the weather calmed down at least a bit.
She turned at the sloshing-squeaking sound. He was walking over to his bag. Sharon stopped trying to light the fire and stood up. It was easy to notice that if there was ever a moment to do something, to show him, talk to him about what she really felt, it was right then. Alone in a cabin with nothing to disturb them.
"I tried calling you." She said a bit desperately. He turned to face her. "There is no service here though, I'm sure Abby thought it was a clever ruse." They stood in silence for a moment longer, she fidgeted with the lighter. The flame turning on and off at her side. "I just needed to hear your voice." It was so soft that if they weren't alone in the middle of nowhere, Andy would have missed it entirely.
He fisted the towel and swallowed when he saw tears forming in her eyes. His hand ran behind his neck through his wet strands of hair. How could he respond to that? I wanted to see you? Hearing your voice is never enough?
"At least dry off a bit. If you are so determined to leave." She wasn't worried to sound eager. Besides the danger he could encounter, she wanted him to stay. Having him there gave her the courage to say everything she had been suppressing. She didn't want to be away from him. Her sudden impulse to talk to him finally made sense, it was everything Abby had said and more. It was better loving someone than never being with them. He made her happy, she longed for his company and hearing his voice was part of it. "I'll start the fire. You can warm up and wait for the rain to die down a bit before you go." He nodded because of the pleading look in her eyes. How could he deny her? He didn't want to go either, even if it was for all the selfish reasons. She wanted his safety, he wanted her company.
She sighed gratefully as he bent to remove his shoes; she returned to the previous task - starting the fire. She didn't remember it ever being so complicated. But, of course, she had never been alone in a cabin with the man she loved who was so eager to run away from her. And her hands had never shaken so vigorously. His movements went unnoticed as she brushed her hair behind her ear and continued flicking the lighter on and off trying to get it lit. She didn't realize his proximity until he spoke.
"I left a trail along your floor." The quickness with which she straightened up made him take a step back.
It didn't go unnoticed by her and she offered a smile to retract her error. "It's just water," she waved it off. "I can't seem to…" She looked back down at the fireplace, he smiled just a bit when he saw her bite her bottom lip hopelessly. There were very few occasions when anyone witnessed a conflicted and helpless Sharon Raydor. He reached for the lighter, his hand briefly brushing hers. The shaky breath she took was unnoticed by Andy as he immediately squatted in front of the fireplace and started it easily. After only a second the fire roared just like the lightening in the sky.
He stayed down for a few seconds - trying to ignore his need to look her in the eye, laugh like they always did, ask questions after their silly banter - before standing, then turned to face her.
"It has a bag."
She stepped forward ignoring the fireplace and whatever new invention they had created since the last time she was in charge of warming up a household. He watched her carefully as she moistened her lips with the tip of her tongue and her eyes flickered up from his drenched clothes to his face. His gaze held hers, afraid of looking away and losing out on whatever she was considering.
"You should get out of…" she rasped, then smiled, a blush creeping up her neck. "...dry off." She cleared her throat as her eyes took him in carefully. His leather jacket on top of a single white t-shirt clinging to him. His jeans sporting a similar look. The wetness dripping from his hair down his neck making his skin so enticing. God, he looks sexy. Her hand pulled her hair over one shoulder suddenly feeling hot so close to the fire. The brush of air against her newly exposed skin helped briefly, but she was still burning up.
"I'll be fine," he had to look away. He might have been seeing things, but was sure she was checking him out. He had to remind himself that it was his friend Sharon. They flirted, were playful. This was something they did, it didn't mean anything.
She wasn't sure where she gained the courage, but she took the last step forward, reached for the collar of his jacket and smiled at him when he tilted his head at her. Both her hands advanced to push it off, he didn't move immediately noticing her eyes fill with surprise when her palm landed upon his heart. The rapid beating was showing his excitement and nervousness. His eyes remained on her face, the focus and determination was nothing but alluring. She walked around him already expecting it to stick to his arms and pulled the jacket away. She tossed it on the couch and turned back. Her breath hitched as she could clearly see the pronounced muscles of his back. Andy stopped fighting the urge to close his eyes and enjoyed the way her hand pressed against his back and warmed his cold skin. As she took a step closer, he could feel her hot breath against his neck. He turned around to face her, her fingertips lightly traced the muscle under his sleeve and he fought a shiver. His blood heated beneath her touch, her soft strokes intensifying the need to feel her pressed against him again. He watched her eyes freely and unashamedly scan over him.
His hand unconsciously landed on her hip, squeezing just barely. He pulled her forward just a small step closer. When her hand stopped at his bicep and her breath caught in her throat, he removed his hand quickly and regretfully. He thought of it as a test, some awful nightmare. Where he couldn't participate and had to show how much he could restrain himself under her touch. Sharon could see him overthinking and let her fingers move down his chest in a slow motion. She wanted him to know that she desired his touch, too. Andy was already struggling to keep his thoughts pure or straight, it was absolute torture. Yet she continued and her fingertips met his skin as she managed to pull the shirt away from his jeans.
"Sharon?" He whispered. How much more restraint did she expect him to have?
She finally looked him in the eyes, a small smile tugging at her lips. Her hands stopping when she noticed how lost he was. She licked at her drying lips and he couldn't hold back the little grumble anymore. It caught her attention, but before he could apologize, she ran her fingers through the drops of water at the top of his head and then, because she couldn't resist the urge, ran them through the side of his head, right above his ear. There was no excuse other than wanting to do it.
Andy's arms remained loose at his sides, uncertain if moving would end the moment or frighten her from her trance. The urge to put his hands on the hips of the woman he loved and pull her flush against him was too strong. He still took the chance to memorize every part of her without touching. The contours of her curves, the heart shape of her lips and how soft her touch was. Even if the temptation had him fisting his hands at his sides. He wanted to encourage her, let her know her touch was not unwanted - that he has wanted to touch her in the same way for so long, but couldn't find his words. He knew she could feel the pounding of his heart and hoped it would speak enough for his silence. One single finger followed the outline of his jaw and her gaze landed on his lips.
There was a pleading look in his eyes that she couldn't decipher and stopped her hands from moving anymore.
"You should," she hesitantly slid her hands away from him, but he caught one of her shaking hands in his. Their hearts beating frantically. "You're freezing," she breathed out. "You should take a warm shower. I'll try to find some coffee or order it in." She didn't want to pull away from him, not again. Not after feeling his body twitch under her palms, how he held his breath, the soft way he called her name. After admitting to herself that she was in love, all she wanted was to be that way.
When Andy lifted her hand to his lips, she had to keep herself from letting out the whimper that was building inside of her. He felt her tremble against his touch as her eyes fluttered shut. He would do it a million times over to witness that moment again. Andy waited till she opened her eyes and looked at him before he spoke.
"I'll be quick," he breathed out the promise and let her go.
Sharon nodded, unable to form a word, much less a response. Her eyes shut as he turned and walked away. When the bathroom door closed, she found the strength to move again. She felt like a hormonal teenager; her heart was racing, her stomach flipping and other parts of her body were reacting in ways they hadn't done in years. She swallowed when the sound of the shower started. There was just a door separating them and she had one more reason to love the rain. It had kept him in the cabin with her.
Andy stood under the spray of water, his heart beating frantically. Her touch had been precise, soft. It was as if she wanted to feel his skin. If he wasn't mistaken, she was enjoying it as much as he was. The whole situation was confusing. He let his head fall back and the water run over his face. Sharon had almost undressed him, not the other way around. There was nothing he could beat himself up over.
When he stepped out of the bathroom, his eyes lingered on her standing at the small table built for two. He looked around before setting his bag down by the door, she turned to face him.
Sharon didn't hide then as her eyes looked him over. He wore a dark denim pair of jeans and another white t-shirt. She bit her bottom lip when Andy flashed her a knowing look.
"They brought dinner, I cancelled the plans at the restaurant before you arrived. I hope this is alright." She looked at the small table disappointedly. If she had known Andy was coming, she would have appreciated a dinner out with him. He walked closer to the table and stopped.
"It's perfect." He shrugged with a soft smile. He pulled out her chair and took the other one in front of her. The silence that emerged between them was not uncomfortable or filled with tension the way they could have both expected. In fact, it was very welcome. It allowed the anxiety and pressure of having to get back to their old selves fall away. It came naturally. She finally looked up and noticed Andy staring out the window and thinking things over. His words in the murder room crossed her mind and she set her fork down, his eyes drawn to her by the clatter.
He could see she had something to say by the way she tucked her hair behind both ears, it was a sign that she was determined. Even more so than when she nervously put it behind only one ear. He kept his eyes on Sharon as she took the fork again. He knew it was serious because she needed to keep her hand busy, fidgeting. Her lips pursed and he exhaled, it's not bad news. His breath caused her to look up.
"What is it?" She frowned.
"That is exactly what I wanted to ask you." He voiced kindly. There was a hopeful glint in his eyes which made Sharon's heart beat hurriedly.
She shook her head and let out an audible breath before taking a bite of her food. He had obviously broken her concentration. Instead of pushing her for an answer, he picked up his own fork.
"It wasn't a mistake." She let out quickly. He looked up at her, brows drawn together, his mouth full. "I left you at that club because of Abby." Her shoulders relaxed, a weight lifted from finally being able to tell him.
He coughed. "What?" With a weak but hesitant smile she offered her glass of water, which he took eagerly.
"You okay?" She asked.
He nodded, "What did you say?" His eyes glared at her.
This wasn't how she imagined it happening. Awkwardly, clumsily or with a table separating them. Yet she couldn't stop.
"You said we should forget about it… that our feelings were confused." Andy's eyes landed on the way she tossed her food with her fork from one side to the other. When the pause lingered for too long, he reached across the table and gently pushed her plate aside. He needed her to look at him before she continued. She put her hands on her lap and looked up at him. The way his darkened brown eyes bore into hers took her breath away and speaking almost felt too difficult. She pushed herself to continue. "Abby goes through these flings and she set her eyes on you this time." Her voice broke and she couldn't bear looking at him, so she focused instead on the water rolling down the window seal. "I needed to clarify things with her before I could come talk to you. I'm sorry I ran." Her eyes closed and she shook her head.
Not a single apology could make up for what she did. It would never be enough to tell him how much she regretted it. However, she needed to start somewhere. Andy went over what she was saying in his mind. He thought he knew what she was insinuating, but it couldn't be. He had told himself over and over that friendship was all they could ever have. When he realized it had been quiet for too long, he cleared his throat.
"You said… you didn't," Andy breathed out the word that had continuously hurt him. "Never, remember?" She nodded. How could she forget it? And how had she expected him to still be willing to try it after everything? After she had pushed him away.
"Yes, and…" she held her breath when she felt him next to her. She hadn't even heard him stand up. He leaned against the table and she impatiently took his hand in hers. Her eyes closed and filled with moisture at the sensation it brought her. "It took seeing you with Abby." She stopped, because being jealous of her sister was her own fault, he didn't need to hear about it. "Did you really think it was mistake?" His thumb wiped away the tear running down her cheek. She couldn't hold them back anymore, finally being able to touch him and speak to him. "That we had confused our feelings?" She couldn't look him in the eye, just focused on his thumb brushing the inside of her wrist. "Is it too late to ask for a second chance?" She let out.
Sharon wouldn't understand why she was afraid of what they could be. It all seemed so clear now. Not having a chance terrified her. He closed his own eyes. Everything he had said in that murder room had been nothing more than a script, something to make life easier on her. He had only caused her pain. She had asked him to dinner and he had brushed her off. All she wanted was to clarify.
"Second chance?" He smiled, his knuckle pushing her chin up so she would look at him. She felt stupid, she could see the humor building inside him expressed through his eyes. However, she couldn't let it all go away so quickly. Not when she was sure he once wanted it, too. "Did I miss our first?" He smiled the way that made her weak in the knees.
Sharon's breath caught as his finger moved against her bottom lip. Softly, so gently it made her tearful. His own eyes following the movement, they expressed all the want and longing she felt as well. She thought he might just kiss her and her stomach flipped at the thought. She stood up slowly and their eyes met. Looking at him in a way that has his heart feeling like it would beat right out of him. His hand shifted across her cheek and into her hair. Her eyes closed when he leaned forward and kissed her forehead.
"I'm sorry," she whispered tenderly and leaned into his touch.
"Don't be," he pulled back and looked down at her with a warm smile, his fingers opening and closing in her hair. "Sharon, you can have your first and second chance with me." She smiled up at him. A sudden relief overtaking her completely. "No more running, hmm?" He said with his own voice betraying him. He had nothing to forgive her for, but he wasn't sure he could make it through another time of her fleeing from him.
Her hand landed on his chest, looking at her own fingers, and a warm smile appeared on her face.
"I…" she looked up at him again and shook her head. He didn't want excuses, he wanted a promise. "No more running." She whispered.
"If you have the sudden urge, you invite me to come with you." That made her smile. "We talk through it. I can't take it when we are acting indifferent towards each other." She did the one thing she had the urge to do for some time. Her hands wrapped around his neck as she pushed up on her toes and hid her face into his neck. His arms went around her waist and she let his warmth consume her.
"I was afraid of my past, of hurting you." She closed her eyes. "I realized how unfair I was being. I knew it and it hurt, you have to know that. It was never easy to walk away or stop our friendship from becoming more." He tightened his hold on her and turned his head, his nose in her hair, breathing her in. He couldn't remember a time when he didn't want to be holding her, it was such a distant memory. But it was her words that triggered the need to hold her. "Then Abby…" she stopped, shaking her head, because it all sounded so ridiculous now.
He placed a tender kiss against her temple that warmed her completely.
His words were softer than she had ever heard him speak, "It was always you."
Sharon slowly pulled back with her head ducked, trembling hands never leaving his body and running down his chest. It felt so comfortable and so right to be held by him. He opened and closed his fingertips against her back. He relished the way the smell of rain vanished and only her perfume filled his senses. When Provenza had sent him away to fix the problem, he never imagined this to be the way things would happen. She tilted her head up and he saw the tears in her eyes, her worry and her desperate attempt at reading what he was thinking. Andy ran his hand up her back and held her to him.
He leaned forward, but stopped - it had gone terribly wrong once. Sharon caught on his hesitation immediately and slowly pushed up on her toes. God, she wanted it, him. She waited a few seconds before licking her lips and placing her hand against his cheek. His eyelids fluttered shut.
"Andrew Flynn," he opened his eyes to her smiling. He loved when she called him that. "Kiss me." Her breath was soft against his lips.
Andy closed the space between them. When their lips brushed, Sharon released a soft hum and her eyes slowly fell shut. It felt like it had been an eternity since they were last like this. She smiled against his mouth as he pulled her closer. Melting into him was an understatement, Sharon gave into his touch entirely. She only realized how much her body needed it when he pulled back.
Her protest was immediate as she gently fisted his t-shirt with one hand, the other running up the back of his neck and pulled him to her. She joined their mouths with a little satisfied murmur. He smiled into it. They kissed slowly, gently, enjoying being wrapped into one another. He tasted sweet and salty, she couldn't get enough. Sharon took his bottom lip between hers and sucked on it softly. Andy grunted and ran his hand up through her hair. The feeling of her lips sliding against his was far better than he remembered.
The lightning in the sky illuminated their faces, the thunder sounding only seconds later. He smiled when she wrapped her arms around his waist and held onto him, breaking their kiss. If anything would startle her or make her move away, it was the rain starting up again. He was happy to see she was searching for a way to move closer.
That was not how she expected to spend her day, but she couldn't complain.
"I'm afraid you can't go home anytime soon." She grinned when the rain fell upon the roof heavily.
"Is that right?" He chuckled.
Her response was blurred into a haze as he brought their mouths back together for another kiss. Unlike before, there was some urgency, a need that they were both allowing to be fed. It felt exquisite, his fingers fluttering against her back and massaging her scalp. Hers opened and closed against the nape of his neck and her other hand was wrapped tightly around his back. He felt like he was taking a breath of fresh air, only it was all Sharon. The smell of her shampoo, perfume and the sweet taste of her drink upon her lips.
A rush of heat shot through her spine when his tongue brushed against her lower lip. She tilted her head and opened her mouth to him. There was a tingling sensation that moved through both of them and a tightening in her stomach she had never expected. It was joy. He tugged her closer, but there was no more space left between them. She swallowed the deep sound he emitted in objection and they pulled back breathing heavily. Her hand moved across his cheek and her thumb stroked his bottom lip. The smile she flashed was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
Sharon moved with Andy as he led them to the couch, fingers laced - there was no way she would let go of him again.