This is being written in collaboration with my talented friend nightchild78. We are having fun bouncing ideas off each other, and sharing in the excitement of watching this story unfold!
Special thanks to Rose Malmaison for making the image to go along with this fic!
Categories: NCIS/Torchwood
Rating: M
Characters: Tony DiNozzo, Leroy Jethro Gibbs, Abby Sciuto, Tim McGee, Ziva David, Dr Donald Mallard, Jimmy Palmer / Jack Harkness, Ianto Jones, Toshiko Sato, Owen Harper.
Pairings: Tony/Gibbs, Jack/Ianto, Tosh/Owen.
Warnings: Swearing, slash, Mpreg, explicit sexual situations.
Spoilers: Set during the 6th season of NCIS and after Children of Earth for Torchwood. Mentions of the episodes SWAK and Requiem for NCIS, and for the episodes Cyberwoman, To the Last Man, Dead Man Walking, A Day In the Death, Exit Wounds as well as the whole of season 3 of Torchwood. Miracle Day never happened.
Disclaimer: We don't own these characters. We just like to play with them.
RENASCENCE RENASCENCE RENASCENCE
"This is so cool!" Abby gushed, carefully examining not only the information on Tosh's computer, but also the assortment of gadgets that her old friend had shown her at the new work station she had set up in a second floor bedroom. Though the team all lived together in the house, with seven bedrooms on the second and third floors, the extra rooms had been turned into "offices" of sorts, leaving the downstairs living areas to truly feel like home.
The large windows provided pleasant lighting even on cloudy days, and the lighter shades of the walls enhanced the impression of space and comfort. The spacious 19th century house was sold furnished when Abby had found it, and the high tech equipment scattered among the refined furniture seemed somehow out of place. But it also made it look less oppressive and frightening and offered a perfect cover for their secret activities. No one would ever guess what was going on behind the elegant red-brick facade of the manor.
"So, you check for alien activity , and then go hunt them?"
"Not necessarily 'hunt'. Sometimes we hunt and capture them. Sometimes, we simply study them," Tosh clarified. "Jack has an old friend with the police department who keeps us updated on any unusual sightings or attacks. We scan the areas with the highest concentrations of these sightings, and, in the case of attacks, we hunt the alien, and try to remove them as a threat. "
"And, when they're not threats?" Abby asked.
"Sometimes they are just curious visitors. We came across a species recently that took up residence in the woods. Just cute little balls of fur! Perfectly innocent, and very friendly!" Tosh giggled in recollection.
"Aww!" Abby cooed. "So, um...I was thinking...if you guys need any extra help, I might be useful. Part time. You wouldn't even have to pay me." Abby's eyes were hopeful. Her tone tentative.
"I told Jack you might be bringing this up," Tosh laughed. He's the one to ask. But last I checked with him, he said we could use assistance from you - and your friend Agent McGee. On his very strict terms!"
Abby nodded in understanding. "Tim is gonna be psyched!"
"Talk to Jack before you get too excited!" Tosh laughed.
"Got it!" Abby nodded, before quickly changing the subject. So, Tosh..." She eyed her friend with curiosity. "What was it like being dead?"
Tosh smirked with amusement. "I was wondering how long it would take you to ask me about that."
"Well, it's not every day that your friend comes back from the dead!" Abby said excitedly. "Come on! Tell me about the afterlife! What do you remember?"
Tosh became very quiet, a thoughtful look in her eyes, and a faint smile on her lips. "I don't remember much, really. Immediately after my resurrection, it felt like waking up from a pleasant dream. So I'm sure it was nice. Every now and then, I get fleeting feelings. Feelings of warmth, and being loved. It had to be real! And yet..."Tosh's voice trailed off.
"Yeah?" Abby asked, quieter than was usual for her.
"Jack has come back from the dead more times than anyone can count. Yet all he remembers is darkness. Nothingness. He has been very insistent about this truth all along. But these feelings I get...they're so real! How can I be wrong about it?"
"Maybe you're not," Abby offered. "From what I understand, Jack never stays dead for very long. So maybe he just never had enough time to really experience what's on the other side."
"Perhaps," Tosh said thoughtfully. "But I was dead for a year, and I scarcely remember it."
"Would you want to?" Abby asked, lowering her eyes. "Maybe it's better this way. If you remembered what heaven was like, I doubt you'd want to stick around here."
Tosh hugged Abby tightly, a watery smile blossoming on her lips. "Of course I would! I'm here in America! With people I love and a new chance to enjoy life once again. Oh yes, I would!"
Abby smiled, squeezing Tosh a little tighter. Appreciating her friend so much more after having already lost her once.
RENASCENCE RENASCENCE RENASCENCE
It was Sunday morning, and Owen, Ducky and Jimmy had just finished examining Tony. Much to his relief, no further blood samples were needed.
Owen's bedside manners couldn't be more unlike Ducky's. But the two men seemed to have found common ground, and they managed to work together more smoothly than would have been expected.
"Everything looks good!" Owen confirmed. "You may feel like hell, but you're in better shape than when you got here."
Ducky nodded in agreement. "I don't see any reason to keep that IV stuck in Tony's hand, do you?"
Owen shook his head. "Not at all."
Ducky looked to Jimmy. "Mr. Palmer, if you would?"
"Right away, Doctor Mallard," Palmer nodded, gently removing the needle from Tony's hand.
"Good to finally have that damn thing out," Tony winced, rubbing his hand.
"You've been a good sport," Owen told Tony with a sympathetic smile.
"Yes, he always has been one to take things in stride," Ducky said affectionately.
"We are in the process of procuring a proper ultrasound machine," Owen informed Tony and Gibbs. "Should be here shortly, and you can get a good look at the baby."
Tony gave a forced smile and looked away. "Great," he nodded, not sure he actually meant it. Seeing the gleam in Gibbs' eyes, Tony wished he could feel anything other than fear or worry over this pregnancy.
"Now, you let me know if you need anything else, all right?" Owen offered, as he, Ducky and Jimmy made their way to the door.
Tony smiled. "Thanks, Dr. Harper."
"Owen! For the love of God, call me Owen! No need for formalities!" Owen said in mock annoyance. Being dead had caused him to reconsider a lot of things he had taken for granted when he was still alive, and he was now a lot less of a stickler for titles. Life was too short and fragile to waste your time with those kinds of considerations. Death had changed him. Tosh had changed him.
"Got it. Owen." Tony smiled.
Once they were alone, Gibbs scooped Tony into his arms and they stayed silent for a moment, neither of them willing to be the one to start the conversation they knew was coming.
"I'll still love you, whatever you decide," Gibbs finally told Tony in a reassuring whisper.
Tony looked up into soft blue eyes that were gleaming with compassion, hoping to God he'd heard correctly.
"But...this is you chance to -"
"Forget about all that," Gibbs interrupted. "I love you, Tony. And I'm not gonna force you to do something you're not ready for. If we decide we want kids later on, we'll talk about it. We'll find another way. But only when we're both ready."
Relief washed over Tony's face as he nestled himself deeper into his lover's arms. "I still don't know what I want...yet. But, whatever decision I make, I won't make it without you."
The couple lay together in silence, feeling safe in the comfort of their mutual trust and respect.
RENASCENCE RENASCENCE RENASCENCE
Jack walked into the kitchen, closing his eyes and breathing in the aroma of fresh coffee. Ianto stood with his back to Jack, pouring a cup for each of them.
"Just us?" Ianto asked, setting their cups down on the table as they took their seats.
"For now," Jack answered. "Doctor Mallard is talking to Owen. He wanted to know all about his death, and what it was like to watch his own body decompose. I'd heard Dr. Mallard likes to talk to the dead. He must be thrilled the dead are talking back for once," Jack said with a chuckle. "I believe that Mr. Palmer is off reading somewhere, and I think Toshiko and Ms. Sciuto went out."
"What about our expectant couple?"
"Special Agent Gibbs will be in for coffee shortly. As for our gestating gentleman...I'll be showing Tony around the house a little later. I figure the more he sees of our operation, the more comfortable he'll be letting us treat him." Taking a sip of coffee, Jack gave a satisfied smile. "Ianto, you are a God!" he exclaimed, in praise of the Welshman's coffee.
"That's what you said last night," Ianto quipped.
"What can I say? You're a man of many talents," Jack said with a wink.
Ianto gave a soft laugh, his mind turning once again to their guests.
"Forgive me for seeming cold. But considering the difficulty that Special Agent DiNozzo is having in accepting his pregnancy, and the risks you admit are ahead for him, should he keep the baby? Perhaps it would be more merciful to abort the pregnancy and then Retcon our NCIS friends."
Jack shook his head. "Tony feels conflicted. He's said so himself. This means that there's a part of him that might want to keep that baby. And it's not our right to take that choice away from him."
Ianto nodded. "Understood." Taking a sip of coffee, the Welshman looked thoughtful. Something had been gnawing at him since their pregnant guest had arrived.
"Jack, I notice that you are still very formal in the way you address the majority of our new friends. Except for Special Agent DiNozzo. You already feel comfortable calling him 'Tony'. Why is that?"
"What do you mean?" Jack looked a little uncomfortable at Ianto's line of questioning.
Ianto sighed. He was hoping for some truth, but Jack had previously been very guarded about his past. Ianto hoped this second chance they had been given might see Jack opening up.
"In the time I've known you, you've made passing remarks about being pregnant. We all assumed you were having us on. But I've seen the kindness you've shown Tony. You're very gentle in your interactions with him. You seem to have a unique understanding of his condition. So I can't help but to wonder if you really have been pregnant in the past."
Jack took a deep breath, steeling himself.
"Yes, Ianto. I was pregnant. A long time ago. At the end of the second World War, and months after I left Estelle, I... met a man. I didn't plan it at all but... one thing lead to another, I ended up pregnant and gave birth to a daughter."
He took a deep breath and cast a glance towards Ianto.
"Nobody ever knew about her."
A wistful smile spread across Jack's lips, as if he was remembering something both joyous and painful. "She was so beautiful!" His eyes gleamed with tears, and there were echoes of heartbreak in his voice.
Moving to the other side of the table, Ianto sat down next to Jack, taking the older man's hands into his own.
"Tell me about her."
RENASCENCE RENASCENCE RENASCENCE
Jack had observed a change in Tony's disposition since his arrival Friday night. He seemed calmer. A little more at peace, and perhaps even coming around to a reluctant acceptance of his circumstances and the decision he was facing. Since Tony had arrived with only his work cloths, Ianto had been generous enough to lend him some pajamas and an outfit until McGee could bring him a change of clothes later that day. They were roughly the same height and Jack had to admit to himself that the Welshman's jeans and deep red t-shirt Tony was wearing were a perfect fit.
As promised, they had worked their way from the outside in, starting in the garden. With its 10,000 square feet of living space, along with a renovated carriage house on the grounds, the house itself was rather impressive, but the garden was even more so, and Jack had to admit that he loved wandering through the three-quarters of an acre of well kept landscaped garden.
Tony seemed at peace among the flowers, remembering time spent in his mother's garden as a young boy.
"I'd help her plant and water the flowers," Tony recalled. "Well...I thought I was helping. I was probably just making a mess," he added with a laugh.
He paused in front of the sunflowers, looking thoughtful.
"These were mom's favorite. She said sunflowers represent happiness. To this day, every time I see a sunflower, I can't help but smile." Tony sighed. "Those were my happiest memories. In the garden with mom."
Tony laughed nervously, as if he were embarrassed. "Sorry, Jack. I've been thinking about my mom a lot lately. If I have this baby, I hope I can be even half the parent she was."
"I think you will, Tony. She seems to have left enough of an impression on you that I don't see how you could help but to follow her example," Jack said gently.
"You'll think I'm crazy, but, standing here in front of the sunflowers, it almost feels like she's still alive. Like she's in this garden, watching over me. Maybe if we had had more time..." Tony choked out a tearful laugh. "I'm an idiot."
"No, you're not," Jack reassured Tony, knowing all too well the gap the absence of a mother could leave in a life. "You're a son who misses his mother. And if standing here looking at sunflowers helps you to feel she's near, you can come out here as often as you like."
"I might take you up on that," Tony said, smiling faintly. "But it's a little buggy out here at the moment." He swatted at some flies. "I'm ready for the grand tour."
Once inside, Tony paused to admire the piano in the living room, recalling how his mother used to love to hear him play. Though he lacked confidence in his playing, his mother always offered him gentle encouragement, and never let him give up on himself. She was his biggest fan. He told Jack that he still plays, as a way of honoring her memory and keeping her with him, if only in spirit.
Jack found it touching how Tony's mother continued to touch his life, and even more so in pregnancy.
In the family room, Tony could have gone on for hours about the extensive movie collection. But Jack had enough at about 20 minutes, and they moved on.
The decoration of the house was simple, but in good taste. All the walls were painted in white, the only touches of color coming from the furniture and soft furnishings. The decorator who had renovated the house before they took possession of it had done a great job and Jack hadn't seen the point of changing anything at all. It was certainly not the most practical house considering their jobs, but at least it felt cozy and welcoming. After more than a lifetime spent underground, Jack didn't see why he couldn't allow himself some comfort.
Tony didn't wish to linger in the kitchen, as smells still bothered him. He found the sun room peaceful, and said it would be a good place to sit and play his guitar.
Once upstairs, even Tony couldn't deny the gadgets and computer programs Tosh had were "pretty cool". But he made Jack, Tosh and Abby swear to never tell McGee he'd said so. Tosh also took the opportunity to inform Tony that the ultrasound machine had been delivered and Owen was installing it, so they could have a proper look at his "impromptu lessee" as she called it. This managed to draw a smile on Tony's lips in spite of the circumstances.
At that point, though, Tony had had enough, and told Jack he was ready to go back downstairs and lie down.
Jack agreed that Tony shouldn't over exert himself, and recommended he get a drink of water once downstairs.
Standing at the top of the spiral staircase, Tony suddenly felt very dizzy. He had started to regret walking around so much after being in bed for nearly two days. His body clearly wasn't ready to be pushed so hard. He descended two steps before Abby, squealing with excitement at something Tosh had shown her, startled him, and he went tumbling head first down the stairs before landing with a thud at the bottom.
Hearing the fall, Gibbs and Ianto ran in from the kitchen to find Jack already at Tony's side.
"I'll fetch Owen and Dr. Mallard," Ianto informed Gibbs, who nodded his appreciation to the Welshman before turning his attention back to Tony.
Tony's eyes were closed tightly, his face twisted in pain. He was clutching his stomach and rocking from side to side on the floor.
"Tony? Tony, you all right?" Gibbs couldn't help to ask, though he clearly didn't look all right.
Finally opening his eyes, Tony gave Gibbs a mournful look.
"It hurts, Jethro," he whispered. "I think something's wrong with the baby."