Beca could hear the arguing coming from her apartment, she frowned unlocking the door and recognized the voices. It was Jesse and Sandra. For a moment, she considered walking out and coming back after Sandra leaves but she decided against it and stepped inside the apartment. Her head was still pounding but it wasn't as bad as it was when she woke up.

She stood by the living area and watched them as they stopped arguing and looked at her. Sandra locked eyes with her for a moment before she started to make her way to the front door.

Beca flinched when Sandra slammed the door behind her, "What's going on?" she asked watching Jesse take a seat on the couch and joined him, smiling at the innocent look on Sam's face, clueless to what was going on.

"Sandra got a job offer as a director of photography for some late show in New York City. She accepted it and will be moving there in a couple of weeks." He went quiet.

"Wait, she's taking Sam with her?" she asked rhetorically.

"Yeah," he nodded.

"She can't do that to you. She can't just take off and move to the other coast with your daughter,"

"She can and she will,"

"Well, take it to court,"

"Beca, I'm not gonna fight Sandra over Sam's custody, she's her mother, has a far better job than me, and she'll win," Jesse shrugged.

"So you're just gonna let her take Sam away from you?"

"What do you suggest I do?"

Beca eyed Sam who was crawling to them and took a deep breath, "Move to New York," she suggested and felt a lump in her throat.

"What?" he tilted his head to look at her.

"Trust me, you wouldn't wanna miss out on your daughter's life…" She had to stop to clear her throat, "I have a lot of friends there they can help you settle in. And as for work," she paused to exhale, "I'll help you find something. I know a guy who runs a private school, and with the score you did I sure you'll get offered to score again, you're really talented."

"You want me to move to New York,"

"I think it's what you should do. My parents are divorced and I'm telling you from experience, stay close to your kid for the first few years of her life, at least."

"I can't just give up my life here,"

"What is it more important than your kid that you don't want to leave behind here?"

"Not more important than Sam," he reached for her hand and held it, "But important enough," he eyed her.

Beca's heart was racing as she tilted her head to look at him. "What's that?" she managed to ask.

"You," he leaned in, capturing her lips in his.

"No," she forced herself to pull away. Removing her hand from his and getting on her feet. She gave him her back, trying to keep her emotions in check.

"No?" he got up.

"No," she shook her head. She couldn't let herself be the reason he stays away from his kid. She's not selfish.

"Beca," he reached for her shoulder and she flinched,

"You're just confused, um, whatever you think it is between us is in your head." She started to make her way to her room.

"Explain your jealousy last night then,"

She closed her eyes, trying to find a way to explain herself. "I don't think right when I'm drunk. You know that. I just want you physically," it sounded lamer when she said it than it did in her head.

"You can't even look me in the eye and say that," he said refusing to believe her.

Stopping by her bedroom's doorway, she took a deep breath and turned on her heels, holding his gaze, "My feelings for you are purely platonic." She said and felt like being stabbed in the guts at the hurt look in his eyes.

"You're lying," he shook his head, "I don't believe you,"

She stepped into her bedroom and closed the door behind her, exhaling loudly, and wiping the tears in her eyes.

Jesse kept staring at Beca's bedroom until he felt Sam hold on to his leg to stand up. He can't pick between the woman he loves and his daughter, that's not fair.

"Bec," Luke said in surprise when he found Beca at the ER, in the middle of the night. "Are you okay?" he asked as he eyed her, looking for any indication that she was sick or hurt.

"Nope," she sighed walking to him. "I need your help,"

"What can I do for you?" he asked in puzzlement.

"Um, I'm gonna need you to pretend that we're still seeing each other. Jesse won't leave if he doesn't see that I'm not interested in him,"

"You are interested in him… You love—"

"—His ex-wife is moving to New York City and taking their daughter with her, he needs to move as well to stay close to his daughter but he won't because of me."

"Beca," Luke called her name hesitantly.

"Luke spare me the love speech, I know what I'm doing. It sucks for me but I won't let him stay away from his kid because of me… Look, if you don't want to get into my mess it's fine I'll figure out another way," she shrugged noting the frown on his face.

"I'll help you," he rested his hand on her shoulder and squeezed it.

"Thanks," she let out a sigh,

"My shift won't be over until tomorrow morning, I'll text you and we'll talk about whatever it is you want me to do over breakfast. How does that sound?"

"Okay," she agreed.

"You sure this is what you want?" Luke asked in a loud enough voice for Beca to hear him, he was sitting on the couch, shirtless and watching TV.

"Yes." She replied from her room. She was standing on the balcony, waiting for Jesse to get home.

It has been days since she and Luke start to pretend that they're still seeing each other. Luke has been sleeping over a lot and today she decided it was time Jesse caught her with Luke.

She exhaled loudly when she saw Jesse's car. She waited until he parked and stepped out of his car before she joined Luke in the living area.

Luke looked up when she reached the living area and took off her sweatshirt. He didn't approve of what she was doing to herself but didn't object. He promised to help even though he knew it made her miserable. And, he liked Jesse and seeing him heartbroken made him hate what he and Beca were doing even more.

He sighed then sat up when she climbed on his lap. "Let's do this," she took a deep breath then leaned in and kissed him.

Hearing the door get unlocked, she reached for Luke's hands and placed them on her breasts.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Jesse apologized when he saw them in the middle of, what he thought was, a heated make-out session.

Panting, Beca pulled away and tilted her head to look at Jesse. He held her gaze for half a second before he paced to his room. She sighed then got off of Luke's lap and reached for her sweatshirt.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" she asked after wearing her sweatshirt. She started to walk to her bedroom.

"You know why," he got up and picked up his shirt and followed her.

"Luke, I'm not forcing you to help me. You're welcome to leave anytime," she said in a low voice, closing the door behind them and watching Luke throw his shirt on the bed.

"What will you do if I do?" he asked. He was worried she might do something stupid to convince Jesse to leave.

"I'll get someone else," she shrugged.

Luke chuckled humorlessly at her words, "You're willing to use someone to get what you want… If I recall correctly the whole point of this is you not wanting to selfishly keep Jesse here and what you're saying is very selfish." He kept his voice low.

She shook her head deciding not to argue with Luke and climbed on her bed, calling it an early night.

Luke didn't wait for her to ask, he turned the lights off and climbed next to her. He knew that if tried to tell her how unhealthy it was to do what she was doing to herself she'd start a fight so he decided against it.

Beca tried to fall asleep but couldn't. She glanced up at the clock on her nightstand to find it 11:43 pm. Luke was asleep and the apartment was quiet so she figured that Jesse went to bed as well.

She decided to do something she hasn't done in years, smoke. She picked up her car keys and drove to the closest store and bought a cigarettes pack then drove back home.

After parking her car, she lit a cigarette and rolled down the window. She felt the smoke burn down her throat after the first puff and soon she got a strange rush that made her a little lightheaded so she leaned against her seat.

Closing the door behind her, she walked to the kitchen and pulled a soda can from the fridge then made her way to her bedroom, deciding to stand on the balcony and enjoy the calm cool night.

She didn't feel the time pass by as she stared at the sky and got lost in her thoughts. Sighing, she lit her fourth cigarette, desperate for any sense of relief, smoking was doing that. She knew it was very stupid and very unhealthy but didn't really care.

Hearing a crashing noise coming from the kitchen, she decided to go check it out.

"Did I wake you up?" Jesse asked glancing up for a second, as he reached for the bowl, he accidently dropped.

"No," Beca watched him for a second then walked to the sink to ash her cigarette then turned on her heels and back to her bedroom.

Minutes after she went back to the balcony, Jesse joined her. He unlocked the door then stood next to her while watching the sky.

"This is really beautiful," he took a deep breath admiring the view, it was the crack of dawn.

"It is." She agreed, bringing the cigarette to her lips.

"Since when do you smoke?" he asked, frowning.

"Since today," she said as she blew a puff of smoke.

"Smoking makes your breath smell like ass," he rested his hands on the balcony.

She shrugged ashing the cigarette then sighed.

"Luke has been sleeping over a lot, huh?"

"Yeah," she nodded, "Um, he told me that he'd like us to date exclusively," she lied.

"That's nice, I guess," he linked his fingers together and exhaled. "I'm sorry about calling you a liar the other day," he apologized.

"It's okay,"

"I've been thinking about your suggestion, a lot," he started to say.

Beca tilted her head to look at him as he spoke, "And?"

"I think you're right," he tilted his head, "I should be with my daughter,"

Beca nodded at his words.

"I don't have anything to stay here for… I thought it did," she could see how hurt he was and couldn't keep looking at him so she looked up at the sky. "And who knows I might get to shine as a composer there," he said sarcastically.

"You should stop selling yourself short because you're really good at what you do," she brought the cigarette to her lips.

"You said you know a guy that runs a school over in New York?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "I'll talk to him and if he doesn't give you a job, there are a few other people I know that owe me favors"

"Thanks, Becs," he reached over and squeezed her arm.

"We're friends," she looked at him and forced a smile. "This is what friends do,"

She did it. She convinced him to leave. Deep down, she was hoping that he wouldn't buy what she was doing, that he wouldn't give up on her easily because she was selfish… But not selfish enough to keep him from being close to his daughter. She cared so much about Sam, and he was a great father. Sam deserved to have him more than she'll ever do.

"Can I?" he nodded at the cigarette.

"Yeah," she shrugged and handed it to him. He put it out then turned to her, "I'd like to still have you around for many years to come and cancer will fuck that up," he smiled at her then straightened up. "You shouldn't smoke," he reached for the door and unlocked it. She watched him as he made his way out of her bedroom and sighed loudly.

The one thing that Beca Mitchell hated the most was saying goodbye. She was a pro at making French exists because goodbyes made her emotional and she didn't do emotional so she avoided saying goodbye as much as she could. And, saying goodbye to Jesse was no exception. She knew that the chances of her losing it were good and she couldn't put all the work she put into convincing him to leave at risk, not to mention the fact that she pulled some strings and got him a position as teacher at school she told him about and also put in a good word for him.

He was set to leave on Thursday. She spent the whole week at Luke's, avoiding Jesse's texts and calls. She couldn't bring herself to even hear the voicemails he left her.

After enough vodka to numb her feelings, she checked some of his texts.

'I know you're probably busy, big time record producer, but I wanted to let you know that I'd be spending the night at my parents, they're throwing me a small farewell party. If you can make it, drop by.'

'My flight is early. 7:30 am. I won't be able to see tomorrow, please drop by.'

'You're either ignoring me or really busy either way, it's okay, you don't have to come. No pressure. Take care of yourself, Becs.'

She felt the tears forming in her eyes so she stopped reading his texts. She was feeling like shit, alone and cold at the beach, the vodka she put in the water bottle and her cigarettes pack were the only things keeping her company.

"Um, hey," she sniffed, "Could you come pick me up, I don't think it would wise if I drove?" she asked.

"Where are you?" Luke asked he sounded worried.

"The beach," she answered and started sobbing, "Luke, it hurts a lot," she cried.

"I know it does," he sighed, "Which beach?"

"Manhattan,"

"Okay, I'm coming. Don't go anywhere until I get there," he said, knowing that it was a long drive there. She sounded drunk, he was afraid she'd decide to do something stupid.

"Okay," she nodded and hung up.

"Jesus," Luke murmured, stepping out of his car. It was cold and by the time he got to the beach it got dark. He spotted Beca's car then made his way to the beach and looked around for her. Seeing her, curled up on the sand, he ran to her while unzipping his jacket.

"Beca," he dropped on his knees, reaching her. He sat her up and had to keep holding her because she was unconscious. He checked her pulse rate then respiration rate before he took off his jacket and wrapped her in it. She was pale, cold, and was breathing very slowly. "Fuck," he swore under his breath, recognizing the signs as symptoms of alcohol poisoning.

Luke picked up her phone and cigarettes pack from the sand and stuffed them in his jacket's pocket then picked up her messenger bag, throwing it over his shoulder, before he picked her up, bridal style.

She was shivering in his arms so he held her closer and paced to his car then sat her in the passenger seat.

"Beca," he tapped her cheek, "I need you to wake up,"

When she didn't respond he closed the door and ran to the driver's seat and got in. Turing the car engine on then turned the car heater before fastening her seatbelt then his. Hearing her phone ring, he stuffed his hand in his jacket's pocket and pulled it. He looked at Beca then at the caller id and decided to pick up.

"Hey, mate," he said first.

"Oh, hi, Luke," Jesse said in surprise. "Beca hasn't been returning my calls and texts and I'm starting to worry."

"She forgot her phone at my apartment," Luke lied, ". She's coming over later. Try calling in a few hours,"

"Okay, thanks,"

"Where am I?" Beca asked, waking up, several hours later, feeling dryness in her throat.

"You're up. Good," Luke said watching Beca shift, "You're at the hospital. You had alcohol poisoning." He informed her, "Good thing you called me," he sighed making his way to her to check her vitals.

"Alcohol poisoning?" she sat up.

"Beca, you need to pull your shit together." He stepped back and watched her as she got into a coughing fit. "Cigarettes and Vodka won't help you," he placed her messenger bag on the bed.

"They're working just fine for me," she said between coughs.

"This will help with the cold you caught," he handed her a pill container and a bottle of water.

"Where are my clothes?" she asked. She was wearing a hospital robe.

Luke nodded at them, folded neatly on a chair.

"Get dressed, quickly,"

"Why?" she asked.

"We're making a trip to the airport," he glanced at his watch.

"No," she shook her head.

"I'm not asking you, I'm telling. Now get dressed." He said sharply then cracked a smile when she got off of the bed, picked up her clothes, and made her way to the bathroom to get dressed.

The trip to the airport was quiet. Luke didn't comment when she pulled a cigarette and she was grateful. He just sighed when she started coughing.

Beca was an adult he can't tell her what she can and cannot do. She knew that smoking on an empty stomach was bad, smoking, in general, was bad and she didn't need to hear it from him.

She convinced him to make a stop for coffee. Hoping, it would slow them down, therefore, they won't make it on time. But when they arrived at the airport and it was 6:10 am, she knew that she had to do something she hated and it was to say goodbye.

"I'll wait here," Luke told her watching her unfasten her seatbelt with shaking hand. He couldn't tell if it was because she was sick or scared. She nodded and pulled her sunglasses and wore them.

"How shitty do I look?" she asked.

"You had better days," he gave her a weak smile.

"That's comforting," she unlocked the door and stepped out of the car. She brought the coffee to her mouth and sipped as she walked inside the L.A.X. She looked around for Jesse. It didn't take her long before she spotted him, sitting by himself. Her heart sank when she started to walk to him, "You can do it," she told herself. Reaching him, she stood still, waiting for him to notice her. It didn't take long before he did.

"Beca," he said in surprise, he was about to get up but didn't when she sat down next to him.

"Hi," she said in a raspy voice then looked away to cough. "I'm sorry I didn't show up last night," she apologized, clearing her throat.

"You're busy, I understand,"

"No, I'm a shitty friend," she said in a cracking voice. She was glad he couldn't see her eyes because she was close to tears.

"You're the opposite of a shitty friend," he disagreed, frowning as he took in her appearance. "Is that sand in your hair?" he asked.

"Yeah," she nodded and didn't elaborate. She needed a moment or two or a hundred to hold it together before she said another word.

They stayed in silence for a few minutes until Beca started coughing again.

"You okay?" Jesse asked.

"It's just a cold," she waved it off. "I caught it yesterday," she reached for the painkillers Luke prescribed for her and swallowed a couple of pills.

"What the hell happened to you last night?" he asked.

She sighed not knowing how to answer him. The truth was off limits. And her headache and cold were keeping her from thinking of a decent lie to tell him.

She kept playing with the lighter in her hand and shrugged. "I got you a farewell present," she told him, "I'll send it to your address in New York. It's too late to go get it now," she sniffed.

"What did you get me?" he asked.

"I'm not telling you," she shook her head then leaned against her seat and closed her eyes then started humming a song Jesse didn't recognize.

"Is this a song you're working on?" he asked.

"No, it's just a cute song I know,"

"Sing it for me?" he requested.

"I have a cold," she reminded him.

"I wanna hear you sing it. God knows when I'll see you again, cmon," he nudged her.

"Okay," she sighed then cleared her throat.

"Time's been ticking, hearts are runnin'

Think that Cupid's up to somethin'

You asked me how I feel, I say nothin'"

Singing the first few lines, she realized it was a bad idea sing this song but knew that it'll look suspicious if she stopped singing so she continued.

"But lately color seems so bright

And the stars light up the night

My feet they feel so light

I'm ignoring all the signs

I keep on frontin', yeah, I stay bluffin'

I keep you wonderin'

Keep you huntin' for my lovin'

But I crave us huggin'

Yeah, I stay stubborn

Cause I can't admit that you got all the strings

And know just how to tug 'em"

Finishing the first verse she felt the tears falling, she sniffed and ran her fingers through her hair.

"Keep going," Jesse encouraged.

"I think I'm in love again

I think I'm in love again

I didn't think it could be true

Let alone that it would be you

I think I'm in love again" she lost her voice and was grateful she did.

"This is all you're getting, my throat is killing me" she managed to say then rested her elbows on her thighs then held her head.

"Bec?" Jesse softly called.

"Mhm?" she wiped her cheeks.

"Are you crying?" he asked.

She huffed trying to hold it together. She started shaking her leg and when she felt like she won't be able to bottle it down for long she looked up. "Have a safe trip," she said and got up and started to pace to the entrance.

"Beca wait," Jesse got up after her.

"Don't turn around, don't turn around…" she kept repeating under her breath as she wiped her cheeks.

"Beca," he called and she cursed under her breath because of how close he was.

"Jesse you should get back inside, you could miss your flight," she stopped walking.

"I can always take the next fight," he reached for her shoulder and turned her around.

"That'll be a waste of good money," she wiped her cheek.

"Did you agree to date Luke exclusively?" he asked.

"What?" she didn't expect his question, "No, not yet. Why?"

She got her answer when he leaned in.

"No," she placed a hand over her mouth, "I'm sick and I've been drinking and smoking. My breath definitely smells like ass," she informed him. He smiled at her worries and reached for her sunglasses, lifting them on top of her head before he wiped her tears.

"I don't care," he removed her hand then leaned in and kissed her, cupping her face and feeling her wrap her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to her. She was the first to pull away, looking away to cough.

"Sorry," she said between coughs.

"You are aware that your coughs are this bad because of smoking," he eyed her.

She nodded and he watched her until her fit ended then pulled her into a hug. "I'm gonna miss you," she sniffed hugging him tightly.

"Beca, I—"

"No," she shook her head and pulled away, "Don't. Please," her voice cracked. "You can't do that to me,"

He reached for her and pulled her back into his embrace. "You should get back inside, Jesse," she said into his chest.

"I don't want to," he shrugged.

"Don't be selfish, think about Sam," she cried.

"A week," he placed a kiss on her head, "Please, give at least a week. Be mine for a week," he begged.

"A week," she pulled away, "Then you leave,"

"Yeah. Just one week," he wiped his cheeks with the back of his sleeve.

"Okay, a week," she agreed. She knew it will only hurt her even more by then but she couldn't say no. He leaned in and kissed her passionately.

AN: *sigh* I'm not gonna lie, I felt awful writing this. It made me sad as fuck. The next and last chapter will be uploaded as soon as I finish writing it.

The song is called I think I'm in love by Kat Dahlia

DISCLAIMER: SMOKING SUCKS BALLS AND KILLS