between your ribs

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing... and I promise, there's always light at the end of the tunnel.

Chapter Five:

September 25th, 2015.

That morning, she wakes to find her mother in her apartment.

"Ma," she groans as Angela wakes her before her alarm has even had the chance. The sleep she'd collected the night before had been sparse. Three hours, tops.

Despite all of their efforts, she and Phillips's team have still failed to find the Matthews siblings. Every night, when Phillips's orders her team to go home for the day, Jane stays behind at the precinct. The leads they have are thin at best but she delves into them and gives them her everything, even if that means that she doesn't collapse into her apartment until two in the morning and rises again at six. The thought that these people are still out there, living freely, and could potentially do this to another innocent woman forces her blood to boil. She doesn't take kindly to those who hurt the people she loves.

"You're just as difficult to wake now as you were when you were fifteen, you know that?" Angela huffs, shaking her. "Get up, Jane."

Jane groans, peering at her clock on her bedtime table. "Jeez, Ma. It's only half five."

Outside, the city is still dark, the only light entering her room is from the artificial one in her hallway. It's yet to wake fully and she closes her eyes again and takes a deep breath. Today, when the city wakes and life begins to move again, Maura will be transferred here. They'll both be in the same city again. And though they'll be physically close again, the emotional distance is palpable. She would live on the other side of the world to Maura if it only meant she would trust her again.

"Get up, Jane. You have a big day ahead of you. I'm making you breakfast."

Jane sighs, rubbing at her eyes. "I'm not hungry."

Angela glares at her. "Listen to you. Your mother gets up early, comes over to your apartment to cook you breakfast out of the goodness of her heart – and this is how you show your gratitude?"

"Alright, alright," Jane concedes, sitting up. "I'll just get showered and changed first. Give me some space."

As she heads into her bathroom and hears Angela clattering with pans in her kitchen, Jane is grateful for the hundredth time that they no longer live together.

When Maura had been found missing… After Jane had called it in, and they'd swept the place, and all that they could find of Maura were her possessions, she'd broken the news to her mother in the bathroom of the precinct. It had to be a private moment. Angela had broke down in tears immediately, but had assured her that she knew Jane would find her. She always did.

Two weeks had passed and they were no closer to finding Maura than Jane was to speaking Latin. It'd been a mutual agreement, that Angela move out of the guesthouse as Maura's parents took over the financial responsibility of her properties, and into Jane's apartment until they could find something more suitable. They'd suffocated each other of course, but eventually she and Frankie had put enough together to put down a deposit for a small apartment a couple blocks from the precinct. With her mother's job, Frankie always willing to help, and Jane cutting back on her expenses while picking up extra shifts, they managed to scrape by and afford it.

"Alright, Ma, I'm ready for breakfast," Jane says after her shower, putting on her usual work outfit and throwing her hair up into a ponytail.

She sits at her kitchen counter and Angela passes her a steaming cup of instant coffee – just the way she likes it – and slides her plate in front of her. Bunny pancakes?

"Ma," she groans. "You know I hate bunny pancakes."

Angela's smile sobers instantly. "Maura loved them."

Guiltily, Jane sets her mug down on the counter and reaches for her mother's hand. Angela looks down, sniffling and Jane squeezes her hand tightly. Sometimes, she forgets that she's not the only one who feels Maura's absence so intensely.

"Thank you, Ma."

Angela shrugs, turning to busy herself washing the dishes as Jane eats. The pancakes are wonderful, sure, but she can't tear her gaze away from her mother. Her shoulders, a little deflated, and the recurrent minute shake of her head. As if she can simply shake the pain away. Jane swallows the last of the pancake and rubs at her chest. If only it were that easy.

"Maura's being transferred to Boston today," Jane fills the silence.

Angela shuts the water off but doesn't look at her daughter. "I know."

Sighing, Jane looks down at her lap, running her fingers over the back of her hands, the bumpy scars. "I know we didn't… Really get to talk about mine and Maura's circumstances. I know you're upset about it – "

"You're damn right I'm upset!"

Jane's eyes widen as Angela turns to her, eyes misty and hands shaking as she holds the dishcloth in her hands. Her mother – while nosy, and interfering – rarely loses her temper with her. Let alone curses.

"Ma – "

"Do you really think that those Doctors know what's best for Maura? Better than her family?"

Jane rubs her hand across her eyes. The blurry images of Maura screaming, wild and terrifying, in that hospital bed have haunted her every night since. And her eyes – the next day, wide and terrified, afraid to be hurt. It causes a blockage in her heart and she struggles to keep it beating steady. Maura is afraid of her. There are many facets of Maura Isles that she has witnessed. She has experienced her anger: bubbling and fierce. Her happiness: wide smiles and glittering eyes. Her friendship: warm hugs and the smell of lavender and the tickle of her hair against Jane's skin.

Maura Isles has never been afraid of her before.

"My family has fallen apart before, Jane," Angela sucks in a sharp breath, wringing the dishcloth in her hands. "When your father left me, Maura took me in without thought. She never demanded anything in return, because she's family. You look out for your family. And when she disappeared – I tried to carry on. I tried to tell myself that my family had existed before Maura Isles ever joined it. But just because it did, it doesn't mean it was whole. And now she's back, Janie, and you're trying to take her away from me again."

Jane rises from her stool, quickly rounds the corner to swallow her mother in her arms. Angela rests her forehead against her shoulder, breathing erratic as the tears begin to flow, and Jane closes her eyes tightly. She feels it so keenly, the loss of Maura. In every aspect of her life. They walk around their lives and talk about her as if she's dead, when soon she'll be no more than a couple of miles away.

"I'm not taking her away from you, Ma," Jane says softly, and Angela pulls away, peering up at her hopefully. "Listen, why don't I give Constance a call, ask her if Maura would like you to visit once she's settled in to the clinic? Maybe in a couple of days?"

Angela wipes at her tears. "But you said – "

"That I have to stay away from Maura, yes. But that doesn't mean you have to."

Her mother's smile is so wide it almost splits her face in two. It leaves her aching to feel that – to know the warmth of certainty in your stomach.

"Thank you, Jane."

Somehow, she stays standing. "She's our family."

When she arrives at the precinct later on, things are slow. Phillips watches over her team pensively, and Ito hands her half of a chicken salad sandwich he claims he doesn't want. Jane shrugs, accepting the food and happily eating as she searches through anonymous tips they've received on the tip line. Phillips had proposed the idea yesterday, and at this point, Jane will accept any help she can get. Most of the tips are bogus, of course – made by paranoid grandmas with nothing better to do but sit and watch out of the window all day. She happens upon one that pikes her interest, though, but after scrubbing security cameras she finds it's a false lead.

Taking another bite, the mayo squirts against her cheek and she squirms, reaching for a tissue.

What kind of food had Maura been fed?

She slams her eyes closed at the thought. No. Objectivity. That's what will separate her from the way she had searched for Maura before. She had been too involved emotionally, exhausted herself so that she could no longer think clearly and the case had become murky. Working independently had been a mistake. This time, she has Phillip's team. Ito. As young as he is, she's begun to feel a growing respect for the kid over the past couple days. He holds his own. She's noticed the way the other agents look down on him, but he faces it head on. Respectfully. Even if she has her own doubts about his ability, she has no doubts about his personality.

But personality won't catch the Matthews. And she can't stop thinking about them starving Maura. She's lost so much weight. The doctors had told her terrifying words like malnourished. They must've fed her, to keep her alive for so long. But barely. Had they forced her to beg? Brought her down to the weakest she could ever be to tear away at her hope?

"Rizzoli!"

Phillips's voice startles her from her thoughts and she finds the room is spinning. It's not all in her head, though – the agents around her are frantic, pulling on jackets and searching through their desks for their guns.

"The BOLO we had out on Melissa Matthews got a hit. Security caught her trying to leave the country at Logan International."

Jane's tugging her jacket on before Phillips can blink, shoving her gun into her holster. "She's still there?"

"Yeah. C'mon. You can join the calvary."

Ito lets her drive – not that he has much choice in the matter – and she chases the four cars full of FBI agents to the airport, hands gripping the steering wheel until her fingers go numb. She knows her driving is erratic, even in this moment. Ito shoots her a couple looks but says nothing, simply holds onto the dashboard and enjoys the ride.

Phillips assembles her team outside of the terminal entrance while Jane straps on her vest. The woman stands tall with her gun clasped in her hands as she barks out orders, the slash of her jaw sharp and has Jane staring. She divides her agents in two, assigning four of them to herself, and three others Jane has never introduced herself to along with Ito to Team B. Jane's team. Her hands falter as she straps her vest on when she realises Phillips has allowed her the chance to lead.

"Remember, we must take her alive. She's useless to us dead. She may have information on her brother's whereabouts, and sources suggest she was an accomplice to the abduction and torture. Do not shoot to kill."

Phillips looks over at Jane. She nods. Jane nods back.

While Phillips takes the south side of the building, Jane leads her team towards the north. They follow with guns raised, through the panic of the crowds in the airport, and her eyes scan the people there rapidly. She has long since burned the photos of the Matthews into her mind, and would be able to spot Melissa from a mile away.

"There," she murmurs back to Ito. Melissa is speed walking across the terminal, headed towards the fire exit.

"With me," Ito says to the agents behind him, leading them across to the fire exit to block her escape as Jane presses forwards, tailing Melissa.

The woman catches onto the fact that she's being followed quickly. One glance over her shoulder and she's caught Jane's eye, her own eyes widening at the sight of her gun. It sends her sprinting, but Jane is taller, legs longer, and she's practically right behind her when Melissa turns sharply, anticipating the agents blocking her exit and takes another path.

"Stay at the door!" Jane yells to one of the agents as Ito and the other agent begin chasing Melissa with her. He sticks by the fire exit, guarding it in case Melissa loops back, and as she hits the ground sprinting again she hears him radioing Phillips.

Melissa is panicked, now. The path she takes is erratic at best, shoving through crowds and toppling over suitcases as she searches frantically for escape. Jane pushes on, Ito right at her heels as her breathing comes harsh. Her legs burn as she pushes her speed a little and she throws off her own sense of balance for a moment, causing her to slow down to avoid falling over.

For one moment, her pulse quickens and the feeling of finality washes over her. Melissa is headed towards a wall at the end of the corridor she's lead them into. It's a dead end. They've got her.

But then she jumps, catches herself on the cover of an air vent. Her feet scrabble against the wall as she tears it away and pulls herself through, and Jane reaches out just in time to feel her slip through her fingers.

"Crap," she growls. She's too tall to fit in the vent. She turns to Ito, who can barely be past five foot five. "Ito – "

She doesn't even have to ask. Jane holds her hands together to give Ito a boost up and he's crawling in after Melissa, his pants of exertion growing quieter as he does.

Jane grabs for her radio. "Phillips?"

"Rizzoli? What's going on?"

"She's in the venting system. Ito's gone in after her, but I don't know where it leads."

"I'll check with security."

Jane drags the last agent on her team back to the main room of the terminal, quickly finding Phillip's looking over blueprints with the security guards. She looks up when she hears Jane approaching, flushed and disappointed, and gives her a nod. It's a small gesture, but it's something.

"The venting system has over ten different exits, I just sent my agents to cover as many as they could but it's unlikely that we'll get them all."

"Then what are we waiting for? An invitation? Let's go and cover the rest," Jane says, starting to move towards the exit when Ito radios in.

"Agent Phillips? Detective Rizzoli?"

Phillips grabs her radio first. "We're receiving you, Ito."

"I'm sorry, ma'am. She got away. That woman is small, and, well, those things are really dark."

"It's not your fault, Ito. Meet us at the entrance."

"Copy that, Ma'am."

Phillips shoots Jane a look, daring her to object, and Jane forces herself to remain silent, to smother the building rage she feels bubbling beneath her sternum. The agent grabs her arm and pulls her to the entrance of the airport, where they find Ito standing around looking anxious. His lips downturn when he spots the expression Jane sports.

"Rizzoli, I swear, I almost had her."

It almost feels like that bullet so many years ago re-entering her. Shredding her insides while she fights to stay standing. She plasters on a small smile and squeezes Ito's shoulder.

"You tried your best, kid."

Phillips covers one of the north-east exits as Ito heads south and Jane sticks with the main entrance. Even as she sees the agents running off to help, she knows that the effort is fruitless. If Melissa was able to shake Ito, she's long gone by now, probably through one of the unarmed vents. She brings a shaky hand to her temple.

She's failing again.

TBC