HUD: The next installment! Please enjoy! :)
Kakashi sighed as he twirled his coffee in his hands. Even though his situation would be better suited with a mug full of liquor, Mr. Ukki seemed to have stashed the good stuff somewhere that Kakashi couldn't and wasn't really too bothered to find. Drinking dull coffee from ten that morning seemed like a good idea at the time.
Sunday had been a decent day. Kakashi had slept in and was able to deal with his Eros-dream side-effects without interruption. It had been a fantastic shower, and he wasn't even going to pretend that Iruka hadn't surfaced a few times. He knew why - he was here, within grasp, possibly interested, and new. Eros wasn't by any means old news, no, but Iruka had flirted back so shamelessly that Kakashi couldn't help but let his imagination run wild.
The way that man chewed on a pen, he couldn't possible not know what he was doing.
So Kakashi had bundled up Pakkun for his usual Sunday walk. Sasuke wanted to stay home, too interested in texting his crush to have room for much else, and Kakashi was fine with that. They left and went to the dog park where Pakkun could meet his other little doggy friends. After the first few trips, Kakashi had noticed that Pakkun seemed to have started a pack of seven other mismatched dogs. To see that little pug snap and growl at a full-sized bulldog was hilarious.
Kakashi brought his usual reading material and felt his thoughts drift back to Iruka snatching a similar book from his hand less than a day ago. He snorted in amusement but pocketed the novel. He had already read it four times anyway, so he pulled his mobile from his pocket and felt a little brave.
If Sasuke could text Naruto, he should be allowed to text Iruka, right? Sure. He was an adult, and so was Iruka, so that was that. Kakashi shot over a brief hello and waited. He watched Pakkun play tug-o-war with a greyhound and tried not to check his phone too often.
Iruka answered a few minutes later. Hello, Kakashi. How are you?
Kakashi grinned, suddenly giddy. Doing well! How's your afternoon going?
Decently. Just trying to get through the rest of my grading. Kakashi frowned suddenly, his pleasant mood dipping. Was that a hint that Iruka didn't want to talk to him?
I'll let you get to it then, he typed. Sorry to bother you.
As Kakashi went to pocket his mobile, keeping his eyes glued to Pakkun as a distraction, the phone vibrated. He looked out of curiosity, not thinking it would be Iruka. Apparently he had been wrong. I'm about done. :) What are you up to?
Kakashi grinned again and answered. Just at the dog park with Pakkun, my brat.
Oh! I didn't know you had a dog. :) Do you go there often?
Every Sunday. Pakkun barked, drawing his attention. Kakashi let out a sharp bark of laughter and snapped a quick picture. Do you get pix?
Pictures, yes. Should I be worried? Kakashi could imagine the tone the teacher used - first correcting his grammar sternly and then being coy. Kakashi felt his stomach flip and tugged lightly at his jeans.
Haha, no. Look. He sent over the picture he had taken and waited. Pakkun still stood at the top of the small dog pile he had somehow created while Kakashi wasn't looking. The pug had his little chest puffed out in pride, and once he noticed he had Kakashi's attention, he barked again. Kakashi couldn't help but laugh.
I assume that little pug is Pakkun? After Kakashi's affirmative answer, Iruka replied, I knew it. He's a crafty little thing.
That he is! Kakashi answered, laughing out loud. Pakkun trotted up, bringing his tennis ball with him. Kakashi took the bright yellow ball and slung it across the park. With a yip, Pakkun was off.
He's adorable!
Haha, thanks. Don't let him hear you say that, though. He's got an ego the size of a house. That pile of dogs is his 'pack'.
Can't say I'm surprised! Kakashi smiled. He suddenly wanted to invite Iruka to come meet him, to get Pakkun's opinion of the man, but it was far too early. He would need to be content with texting for now, and he was.
The rest of the day, they messaged. Kakashi learned a lot about the teacher, from his favourite restaurant to favourite colour and radio station. There was a lot he could have guessed, but even more that was a pleasant surprise. He even managed to figure out a bit of his relationship with Naruto.
This may sound odd, but is Sasuke glued to his phone? Iruka had asked long after Kakashi was back from the dog park. Pakkun was sleeping on his lap as he sat in the living room watching Mr. Ukki's favourite program. Sasuke was on the couch with the butler, tapping rapidly on his smart phone. Kakashi grinned and answered languidly.
Yeah, how'd you guess?
Because Naruto won't let his out of sight for even a second. I can only hope that I wasn't that bad at their age.
Maa, I'm sure you were worse. ;) Kakashi had noticed that Iruka seemed to get a kick out of him typing in his favourite nonchalant response after the first time.
You would be to blame. Didn't you start texting me, Mr. Hatake? ;)
And things like that always made Kakashi pause. He knew, he had to know. Kakashi found himself becoming more and more interested in the teacher, and it seemed like Iruka was on to him. Why else would he be fueling the fire?
Watch this, the next message read. Kakashi didn't reply, instead setting aside his phone and dropping a hand to Pakkun.
Sasuke was laying against the arm of the couch, his feet propped over the back. He had the phone up over his face, still typing rapidly. Suddenly he paused, and Kakashi watched as all the colour drained from his face. He sat up abruptly and excused himself. Ukki nodded and shared a confused glance with Kakashi as Sasuke surged up the stairs.
What did you do? Kakashi found it hard to keep the grin from his face as he typed. Sasuke just flew upstairs.
I may or may not have changed the names of a few of Naruto's contacts when he went to the bathroom.
That's it. Kakashi was in love. You're a genius.
He could hear Iruka's low chuckles. Maybe. Goodnight, Kakashi.
Kakashi was disappointed to stop their messaging, but a quick glance at the time told him he needed to get upstairs soon, anyway. He said goodnight to Mr. Ukki and trudged up to his office. He was more than a little surprised to see Sasuke sitting in his office chair.
"Maa, Sasuke - what can I do for you?" Kakashi asked. He had brought Pakkun along and set the little pug in his doggy bed corner behind the door.
"Uncle, I don't think I can wait to tell Naruto," Sasuke muttered. He spun slowly in Kakashi's chair and faced the programmer. "I've been talking to him all day and he's just...I don't want to wait."
Kakashi smiled wanly. He seemed to have more in common with Sasuke than his nephew will ever know - he was in the exact same boat. Literally. "It's hard, Sasuke, but you need to. See, the thing is - " Kakashi sat on the futon he had against the wall, bringing his eyes level to Sasuke, " - you like another boy. It's hard, to be in high school and like your best friend. You're both young, and if you don't be patient things could become irreparable."
Sasuke lowered his chin to rest on his chest. Kakashi let his words sink in. He may have sounded harsh, but Sasuke learned better when his lessons were frank. "I know, Uncle. I don't want to lose him."
"Rushing is the best way to do it," Kakashi sighed. He leaned back and dropped his hands to his knees. He was suddenly exhausted. "I know it isn't fun to wait, but you have to know if Naruto feels the same."
"He texted me back all day," the teen muttered. Kakashi smiled.
"That's a good start," he said, thinking about Iruka's subtle flirting. "You guys just became friends, like, yesterday, so see how that goes first."
Sasuke nodded and spun lazily. "Why does this need to be so hard, Kakashi?"
"I wish I had an answer," Kakashi chuckled. "But that's life, and love is part of life. At least you aren't alone."
Sasuke paused and caught Kakashi's eye. "Were you?"
Kakashi sighed and scratched the back of his neck. He's definitely going to need to let out some frustration after this conversation. "Not at first. I had my mentor and Ukki as I grew up. But no one else really knows unless they've been there before. So, take my advice, Sasuke - give it time. And don't do what I did," he finished, subconsciously scratching the long scar that bisected his left cheek. At home, he wasn't as cautious, and his hair always tended to stand up wildly anyway. The action caught Sasuke's eye and Kakashi immediately stopped.
"Hn." Sasuke was watching him intently, and Kakashi fought the urge to squirm. His nephew always had a knack for making him feel slightly uncomfortable. "...thank you, Uncle. I'll take your advice."
"Good," Kakashi answered. He smiled and even managed to get a smirk from Sasuke. "Now go on. I have some work to do."
Sasuke's smirk grew. "Sure you do." But he stood and headed for the door. Kakashi resisted the urge to stick his tongue out at the teen as he stopped to scratch behind Pakkun's ears. "Good night."
"Yup," he growled. Sasuke chuckled but shut the door behind him. Kakashi waited a moment before moving to his seat.
Eros was wonderful, as always. He was beautiful to watch, to listen to, and that night he seemed to take to each one of Kakashi's requests with added fervor. Kakashi nearly lost his mind with each and every moan. Damn, that man was flexible.
So, yes, Sunday had been fabulous. He had a great time messaging Iruka, and even the odd conversation with Sasuke hadn't deterred his good mood. When Kakashi came downstairs on Monday, he actually had a bounce in his step.
"My, you and Sasuke seem to be in high spirits," Ukki called. He was sitting at the kitchen island with the newspaper. Kakashi slipped around him and opened the refrigerator.
"What do you mean, Ukki?" He asked, scanning the Tupperware for last night's leftovers.
The butler chuckled and flipped a page of his reading. "The young master was ever chipper to head to school this morning."
"Oh, that's because - score! - he wants to see Naruto," Kakashi answered. He pulled out the remains of lasagne and shut the fridge.
"Ah," Ukki agreed. He nodded slowly, as if the current conversation wasn't entertainment over his reading. "A friend?"
"His first friend, actually," Kakashi agreed. He pulled out a plate and shoved the container into the microwave. After he set the timer, he leaned against the counter and folded his arms over his chest. "This kid is pretty important."
"So I gathered," the butler answered. He flipped the page again and looked up at Kakashi. "And of you, Kakashi?"
"What about me?"
The old man chuckled and shook his head. "I simply care for you boys more than you'll ever know. I'm curious about your light mood," Ukki answered. "And the fact that you and Master Sasuke were mirror images of the other all night."
The microwave buzzer saved Kakashi from having to answer. He spun, feeling his face flush. He knew Ukki was perceptive, but he really didn't want to explain why he was acting like a teenager with a crush. Specifically, acting like his teenager with a crush.
"No reason, Ukki," he said as lightly as he could. The butler's chuckles reached his as he dumped the lasagne on his plate unceremoniously.
"Certainly, Master," the old man answered, tone amused. Kakashi fell silent after that, his flush slowly fading. Ukki didn't press, thank god, but Kakashi wasn't sure why he wanted to dodge the question in the first place.
You're afraid Iruka doesn't like you, that traitorous voice from the library piped up. Kakashi rolled his eyes - that voice was sounding more and more like Obito every time.
"Oh, my," Ukki uttered, drawing Kakashi's attention.
"What's up, Ukki?" He called as he rummaged for a fork.
"It seems the young master's homework was beneath my newspaper," the butler answered. He rummaged a few sheets and sighed. "The boy said he had put it away..."
"That's a shame," Kakashi muttered. He started to cut a chunk of the pasta and paused. "Wait - homework? Why was it on the counter?"
"He had asked me a few questions on the book they were reading in his last period," the old man answered. He looked incredibly remorseful. "I should have double-checked him. He was so distracted yesterday..."
Kakashi sighed and looked down at his uneaten lasagne. He shoved it back into the container and added it back to the fridge. "I'll take it to him."
"Oh, no, master! I shall take the car - "
"Maa, Ukki," Kakashi said with a smile. "It's all right. I know my way around the school better, and I'll just take it to his homeroom teacher to hold."
Ukki smiled back, still obviously distraught. "Then I shall fix you some tea to go."
"Thanks, Ukki. I'll be back," Kakashi said. He was already halfway up the stairs when his thought hit him - take it to his homeroom teacher.
Iruka. Kakashi had the perfect excuse to see Iruka outside of Sasuke's study dates! He could almost thank Sasuke for his laziness. Or should he thank Naruto for the distraction? Whatever - he had an excuse to see Iruka that was both entirely innocent and ego-boosting.
Oh, sorry to bother you, Mr. Umino, but Sasuke left this at home and I know how hard you're working to help him pass. Oh, this was wonderful.
Kakashi ran a quick brush through his hair, still slightly damp from his shower. He usually gave up on trying to tame his wild locks. It was something that he had inherited from his father right down to the silver colour. He didn't mind it, and it usually cooperated with him to hide most of his scar.
Kakashi pushed it back and stared back into his reflection. The garnet of his left eye stood out brightly against his skin. He blinked slowly, and the iris seemed to swirl. He had seen Sasuke's inherited eyes do that on occasion, usually in emotional distress. After a shrug - nothing to be done, now - he allowed his hair to fall gently over the scar and brushed his teeth.
The programmer took the stairs two at a time down as he buttoned his dress shirt. Ukki looked up with clear amusement on his face.
"Sir, did you - "
"Nope, nothing out of the ordinary," Kakashi intercepted. The butler quirked an eyebrow at him and simply nodded. He held out Kakashi's usual thermos and Sasuke's homework. "Thanks."
"Certainly, sir," Mr. Ukki answered. He glanced at Kakashi slyly, making him pause. Finally Kakashi relented.
"What?"
"Nothing, sir," Ukki answered. He spun on his heel and walked back to the kitchen; Kakashi was right behind him.
"Oh, please - you've been hounding me all morning. What is it?"
"It isn't anything unless you want it to be," the butler answered. His words made Kakashi pause. However unaware Ukki was about the situation, he always knew exactly what to say. Which was totally unfair - if Kakashi could choose a superpower it sure as hell wouldn't be insight. It'd be, like, lightning strikes or something cool.
Kakashi sighed and scratched the back of his neck. "Do I look okay?"
Ukki looked up from where he had taken his seat back with the newspaper. "Quite dashing, sir."
Kakashi felt a slight heat raise to his cheeks. "Thanks."
Mr. Ukki nodded and looked back down. "Drive safely, Master. Send Sasuke my regards."
Kakashi nodded and headed for the garage. He didn't realize how stressed he felt until he was pulling away from the gate and turning onto the main road. He sighed, sliding one hand along the wheel while he rested his elbow on the window frame.
It isn't anything unless you want it to be. Kakashi knew that, and he hated to admit that Ukki knew him better than he knew himself, sometimes. He wanted to be closer to Iruka, but he was still so unsure. Of himself, for one, and of Iruka's seemingly mixed signals. The teacher had to know how he was talking, right?
Kakashi sighed, now on the highway. The school was a good fifteen minute drive by highway, but that wasn't enough for him to collect himself. What was he going to say? Should he just drop off the homework and bolt? Would Iruka be okay with him hanging around, maybe wait for his break to talk? He glanced at the monitor in the car's dash - it was almost lunchtime. Maybe he could con Iruka into having lunch in the cafeteria with him.
Kakashi smiled. Yeah, lunch was pretty safe. If not, he would invite him to dinner one night. Kakashi's smile grew as he took the school's exit. There - lunch or dinner. That would do it. Iruka could say no, and that would quell all of Kakashi's thoughts of the man being interested (as saddening as that was, it was the worse that could happen). Or Iruka could say yes, and, well...yeah. Kakashi hadn't thought that far ahead just yet.
Today, he would ask Iruka to a date. However unofficially it may seem, he promised himself he would get that far.
Kakashi felt nervous the closer he got to the school. It was a nice day out, the rain from the days prior had cooled enough to have the kids pull gym outside. Kakashi recognized Sasuke running laps with Naruto around the football field as he put his car in park. Gym before lunch sounded like a good idea; Sasuke was a lucky little bastard.
Kakashi locked his car and headed towards the office. As he opened the door to the school, he paused. Why would they give him a pass just to drop off some homework? He would be forced to leave it there. Fuck that.
He walked the long way to Iruka's class by dodging the office. The hallways were empty except the occasional student scurrying to the bathroom, which Kakashi was grateful for. He didn't expect to be stopped, what with class in mid-session, but he wanted to be safer than sorry. When he turned down the literature wing he noticed Iruka's door was open.
Kakashi felt himself smile as he picked up his pace. It must be Iruka's planning period. When he could hear his own footsteps echo he slowed down, shoving one hand into his pocket and holding Sasuke's work tightly. After a deep, calming breath, he realized he could hear Iruka speaking. He edged closer - Iruka wasn't alone - and peeked around the door.
No, the teacher certainly wasn't alone. A woman sat perched on the edge of his desk, almost a mirror to Kakashi during their conference. She wore a skirt that had to be too short for dress code and a blouse that was open one button too many. Her hair was a deep shade of amethyst and clipped loosely back. Her bangs obscured her face from Kakashi's angle, but he could only assume that she was beautiful. His heart sank.
"Oh, Iruka! You're being so bashful," she purred, and Kakashi had never wanted to hit a woman before in his life. "You know you don't have to be that way around me. Just go for it!"
Kakashi could just make Iruka's profile out, and wasn't at all surprised to see that beautiful blush staining his face. "B-but it's not allowed, Anko. I can't just - "
"Yes, you can!" She said, leaning over further. Kakashi had to keep down his growl. "All you have to do is ask. You never know until you try!"
"Anko, you know this isn't easy for me," Iruka muttered. Kakashi heard him shuffling paperwork as an obvious distraction. "I'm busy, you should go - "
"Oh please, that never works on me and you know it," she huffed, folding her arms over her chest. "If you don't do something, I will."
Iruka gasped, and Kakashi could hear pens scattering across the floor. He bit his lip and looked around the corner just a bit more -
Kakashi whipped back and plastered himself to the wall. No, he had to be seeing things. That, that...woman grabbed Iruka's collar and hauled him up to meet her. No, please, anything but that.
"Anko!" Iruka snapped. Kakashi closed his eyes and kept to himself. He could try and fight the dread. "What the hell?!"
"Don't make me get involved," she hissed. "You deserve some happiness, Iruka. Don't make me force it on you."
Kakashi let out a shuddering breath and covered his mouth. He hadn't seen her kiss Iruka, no - but what else could she mean? Kakashi glanced forlornly towards the open door but didn't look in. He shouldn't have come. He should have just left the papers with the office and went home with the illusion that Iruka might message him when he had some time. Now, he would leave the school with nothing but an unannounced heartbreak he caused himself.
The programmer ignored the open door and its damning conversation and started the long trek back to the office. Kakashi couldn't help but sigh. He had opened himself up to a possibility and was left with nothing but regret. It was his own fault, he decided - he let himself get his hopes up too much too soon.
This was why he didn't socialize. It wasn't anything unless he wanted it to be, right? Well, so much for that.
Kakashi dropped the homework off at the office without much trouble and headed for his car. His eyes drifted to the field again, where he could still see Sasuke and Naruto. Their class were all sitting in the bleachers for a water break, it seemed, when Naruto happily dumped his cup over Sasuke's head. Sasuke swatted at him, but even from his distance Kakashi could feel the joy radiating off of his nephew.
Kakashi smiled bitterly. He never thought that he would have a reason to be jealous of his nephew, but there it was. Naruto may not know, but at least Sasuke still had him close. Kakashi wanted nothing more than the boy to be happy. If he had someone like himself growing up, maybe he wouldn't be such a fucked up emotional shut-in.
That's where he found himself now, staring into that coffee mug and sitting alone in the kitchen. He had come home and headed straight upstairs and didn't come back down until Ukki left to go get Sasuke from school. The mug was cold in his hands, and Kakashi didn't even bother to heat it up. He didn't even feel like lasagne anymore.
Pakkun slid up beside him, his little nails clicking on the tile. Kakashi ignored the dog's pawing and small whimpers until he gave up and just curled in a ball under his stool. The coffee was starting to funnel as he spun the mug.
Iruka had messaged him not too long when he got home, and Kakashi assumed he was on lunch. He stared at the message - just a simple Good afternoon! - until he was seeing double and dropped the phone on his mattress. He couldn't even bring himself to work on the file of code his office had sent over.
Kakashi stayed in the kitchen until he heard the garage door open, signaling Ukki's return with Sasuke. He sighed and forced himself to stand from his seat. After dumping his coffee in the sink, Kakashi headed back to his bedroom. Pakkun trailed behind him and curled up beside him after he flopped onto his mattress.
When the dog continued to nuzzle the side of his neck, Kakashi looked over from where his face had been smooshed into a pillow. "I'm sorry, bud. I don't feel like playing."
Pakkun blinked his dark eyes at him and nudged his nose. Kakashi sighed and scratched the dog under his chin. "Thanks for trying to cheer me up, Pakkun. But I just... I shouldn't be so upset, I have no reason to be, but I thought there might have been...something beginning to happen."
Pakkun licked Kakashi's ear, making the programmer shudder. "You know I hate that." Pakkun made a point to make eye contact and did it again. Kakashi laughed, pushing that smug little doggy face away. "I regret you knowing my ticklish spot."
The dog yipped under his hand and licked his palm. Kakashi pulled his hand back and stuck his tongue out. "Fine, you win. What do you want?"
Pakkun seemed to grin and yipped again. He worked his way under Kakashi's arm to his shoulder and curled into a ball. "Oh, you want to sleep on me?" When the dog let out a content sigh, Kakashi chuckled. "A nap sounds pretty good, actually." He hoped his sleep would be dreamless as he pulled the pug closer. Within seconds, Kakashi was out.
Kakashi woke up with a headache and in a worse mood than when he fell asleep. It didn't help that someone was knocking on his door.
"What?" He snapped. Pakkun stirred beside him and yawned.
"Mr. Ukki wants to know what you want for dinner," Sasuke called. Kakashi sighed and sat up, scratching the back of his head.
"Nothing," he answered with a yawn. Sasuke didn't answer and instead opened his door. "Sasuke - "
"You look like shit," the teen deadpanned, leaning in the doorframe. "What's wrong?"
Kakashi frowned and covered another yawn. "Nothing."
"Yeah right," Sasuke scoffed. "Thanks for bringing my homework."
Kakashi was immediately flooded with the image of Iruka being pulled by his collar by that Anko woman again. "Don't mention it - seriously."
"What's wrong with you?" Sasuke asked again, concern leaking into his tone. "You weren't around when I got home. Usually you come downstairs."
"I'm not feeling well," Kakashi lied. Sasuke quirked an eyebrow but didn't refute it. "Tell Ukki I don't want anything."
Sasuke didn't leave. "You know," he began. "Naruto wants to come over some time. He lives with Mr. Umino, I found out today. Maybe the four of us could do something?"
Kakashi opened his mouth to tell Sasuke to fuck off, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. Sasuke was making an actual effort to get closer to Naruto, and all Kakashi wanted to do was shut it down. The programmer was in pain, alone. He was a terrible guardian, to want to make a teenager suffer with him so he wouldn't be so lonely. "Sure," he said. "Maybe this week."
"Maybe game night?" He offered, and Kakashi nodded because of the boy's unusually hopeful tone.
"It'll give Ukki someone else to beat instead of us," Kakashi answered. Sasuke smiled - actually smiled - and nodded.
"I think he'll like them, too."
"Yeah," Kakashi muttered, imagining Ukki berating him to befriend Iruka already. He looked towards his windows and noticed it was already dark. "On second thought, tell Ukki not to cook."
Sasuke frowned. "You want to go out?"
"Hell no," Kakashi scoffed, still ever the hermit. "I'll order takeout and pick it up."
"Ichiraku?" Sasuke asked.
"Yeah," Kakashi answered. He lifted Pakkun as he left the bed, holding the pug even as he squirmed. "Ayame may even have a snack for you, Pakkun." The little pug stopped his squirming immediately.
"I'll get his order!" Sasuke called, already around the corner. Kakashi couldn't help but grin at his nephew's enthusiasm. Sasuke loved that place, man.
Kakashi set Pakkun back on the bed as he went to brush his teeth. After popping a few painkillers for his headache, he scooped the dog back up and headed down stairs.
Mr. Ukki already had their order written down and waiting as Kakashi slipped his shoes on. "Here you are, Master."
"Thanks, Ukki," Kakashi answered. "I'll call it in while I'm driving."
"Drive safely, Kakashi," Ukki said. "And thank you."
Kakashi waved away his thanks and headed out to his Charger. Truth be told, he always wanted to give Ukki a break from cooking for them constantly, but tonight he wanted to be alone. Pakkun sat calmly in the passenger seat as he drove.
He wasn't going to call in the order. Kakashi didn't mind waiting, and Ichiraku wasn't usually very busy on a Monday night. He arrived and walked in with Pakkun under his arm. Ayame, the owner's daughter, took their order quickly and gave Pakkun a thick piece of pork. The dog squirmed in Kakashi's hands, making the young girl laugh. Teuchi, the owner, stuck his head out from behind his kitchen curtain and called his greeting.
As Pakkun gobbled up his pork, Kakashi paid and headed back out to his car. He rolled the windows down and stretched out. Pakkun yawned from his seat and sighed, belly full and content. Kakashi dropped his hand to the pug's head and scratched his ears.
Kakashi sighed and closed his eyes. Today had not been what he wanted, especially after all the promise and built up anticipation from the weekend, but he supposed it was for the better. Iruka was far too good for him, and his nephew's teacher. He doubted they'd ever be able to be public, if that were the case. Teachers weren't allowed to have anything other than what society deemed to be a normal life.
His fingers slowed their scratches on Pakkun until they eventually stilled. Kakashi's eyes drifted to his glove box. If Ukki knew, he'd be in some serious trouble.
Kakashi had kicked his smoking habit years ago and was very glad he did. But he always kept a pack in his glove box as a security blanket. It was proof that even with the temptation inches away, he could still resist. Tonight, he was feeling particularly low and decided that he deserved one.
The first drag made him cough and woke Pakkun up, but he didn't care. The burn was nice and made him feel. The second drag wasn't as harsh as the first but burned just as nicely. He held the cigarette loosely and let his hand dangle from his open window. Ukki didn't usually take his car, but he didn't want to chance it.
Just the act of holding the cigarette helped to calm him. He dropped the lighter back into the pack and tossed it back in the glove box. Pakkun stared at him disapprovingly, but Kakashi ignored it. One wasn't going to kill him.
"I didn't know you smoked." Kakashi resisted the urge to jump. He looked out his window and felt his jaw go slack.
"Ah, Mr. Umino?" He finally said. Iruka had a small smirk playing on his lips that struck Kakashi to his core. "What are you doing here?"
"Getting dinner," he said, jerking his thumb over his shoulder at Ichiraku. "I just placed my order and recognized your car. I wanted to say hello."
"Well," Kakashi said and took a drag. "Hello."
Iruka waited patiently as Kakashi blew his smoke away from the other man. "Thank you for bringing Sasuke's homework today. You didn't have to drop it off at the office; bringing it straight to me would have been fine."
Kakashi attempted to hide his sudden tremor with another draw. "I didn't want to bother you, Mr. Umino."
"Iruka is fine, Kakashi," Iruka teased. His smile was still light, and Kakashi couldn't help his stomach flip. He already liked Iruka too much, and yet this man was entirely oblivious. It was better that way, if what Kakashi saw earlier that day would ever remove itself from his mind. Seeing the teacher now only reminded him of how numb he felt.
"Sure thing, Iruka," Kakashi answered. He took another drag and Pakkun barked disapprovingly beside him. Kakashi shot a glare at the pug.
"Is that Pakkun?" Iruka asked, leaning a little further into Kakashi's window. He caught a whiff of whatever soap Iruka used and tried not to inhale. Pakkun moved into Kakashi's lap at the sound of his name and pressed his paws against the window frame.
"Yeah," he answered as Pakkun pressed against Iruka's outstretched hand. Iruka hummed and scratched his chin. Kakashi sighed and pinched Pakkun's belly, making the dog drop immediately. Iruka laughed but continued to lean further over the car to continue petting.
"Can I join you?" He asked with that smile, and Kakashi felt himself nodding. Iruka tapped the top of the car and walked around the front. Kakashi was glad he wasn't wearing the same clothes from earlier, and he found he rather liked seeing Iruka dressed down in a simple sweater and jeans.
Iruka opened the passenger door and slipped in. Pakkun immediately moved onto his lap, making the teacher chuckle. "He's friendly."
"Usually he isn't," Kakashi muttered. "He likes you."
"You think?" Iruka teased, scratching under Pakkun's chin. The dog sighed and let his tongue loll from his mouth.
Kakashi grinned. "Oh, yeah. Totally."
Iruka laughed, and Kakashi again used his cigarette as an excuse to hide his smile. A silence settled comfortably, surprisingly, as Iruka lavished Pakkun with attention and Kakashi smoked. He was nearly down to the filter when Iruka spoke again.
"I didn't know you smoked," he muttered, keeping his hand on Pakkun. Kakashi squeezed out the embers and flicked the butt from his window.
"I don't," he answered, rubbing the ash from his fingers on his jeans. "Not anymore, anyway. I did when I was younger, but I haven't in years. Today was just a..." A what? The crash-and-burn ending to something he had built up without pretense? "Just a bad day."
When he looked at Iruka, the teacher's sympathetic expression crushed him even further. The only reason he didn't pull out another cigarette was because he would end up touching Iruka's knee. "I'm so sorry to hear that, Kakashi. What happened?"
Kakashi smiled softly. Iruka's eyes were so full of concern that Kakashi was certain something inside him was ripping. He wanted nothing more than to forget what he had seen, ignore it all and come up with something to tell Iruka. Maybe his mom could have died, but he didn't want to deal with that later. Lying wasn't an option.
"You don't have to say," Iruka added, his cheeks flushing beautifully. Kakashi felt his smile spread. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable - "
"No, it's fine," Kakashi assured. He clapped a hand to Iruka's shoulder and tried to ignore how warm the other man felt. "Just been one of those days."
"Mr. Hatake!" Kakashi looked out of his window towards Ichikaru. Ayame was waving him over, and Kakashi could see Teuchi setting his bags on the counter. He squeezed Iruka's shoulder.
"That's me," he sighed, and Iruka nodded.
"Well, it was nice running in to you," Iruka said. Pakkun didn't move, too content to stay, and Kakashi was suddenly jealous.
"Pakkun, back seat. Go," he said with a snap of his fingers. Pakkun stretched slowly and yawned before hopping back. Iruka laughed.
"That's a great dog, Kakashi."
"Thanks," he answered. Iruka smiled at him and Kakashi returned it, unable to do anything less. "Well, I'll let you go - "
"Iruka," Kakashi said. The teacher paused, and Kakashi pulled his hand back. He wanted to ask so badly.
"Is everything okay?" Iruka asked. Kakashi nodded; he spent too much time thinking.
"Yeah. Sasuke was telling me Naruto wanted to come by sometime," he started. "Wednesdays are game night for us, so he wanted to invite Naruto. Since he stays with you, the offer extends to you, too."
Iruka blinked for a moment, surprised, before a large grin spread across his face. It was so wide that the scar across his nose wrinkled cutely. "I'd like that."
Kakashi smiled again as some of his anxiety lifted. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. And I know Naruto will, too," he added. Kakashi nodded. The teacher continued to grin at him, and Kakashi was surprised to see a faint blush developing. "Well, yeah. I'll let you go, then."
"I'll text you the address tomorrow," Kakashi said, opening his door. Iruka did the same and they walked back into Ichiraku together.
"Sure," Iruka answered. He took a seat at the counter as Kakashi gathered his bags. "Did you want some help?"
"No, I'm fine," Kakashi said. Iruka nodded, and Kakashi busied himself with moving the bags to keep from staring openly at the man.
"Well, good night, then," Iruka added. Kakashi nodded, now situated, and put on a grin he was surprised to discover he actually felt.
"Yeah, good night," Kakashi said with another nod. Iruka waved, and Kakashi headed towards his car.
Once he was inside, he passed the bags to the back seat as Pakkun jumped back up front. He dropped his hand to the dog's back and gave a pat. "You like him, huh?"
Pakkun gave him a look that made him laugh. "I guess I should have known." He looked into the window of Ichiraku and watched Iruka talk to Ayame. She said something to make the teacher laugh, and Kakashi's smile dipped. That strange numb feeling returned as he sighed.
"Yeah. I do, too."
A/N: Poor Kakashi, huh? Tell mw what you thought! Hit up that little box below. ;)