((HAI GUYS! Did you miss me? No? Aw… XD Just kidding. Hey, it's Chapter 6 in Sonic '06! XD Lol.
This is my first chapter in this story of the summer! It's already almost the end of June, but I've been writing other stories. I have no ideas for this chapter, so I'm winging it. Let's see how that goes. We're starting right off with some glitches, along with me questioning EVERYTHING this game has to offer. I love making fun of this game. XD
I suppose this game is a bit of a Let's Play written out, I'm kinda telling you want to do between sections.
But I digress… I really need to cut down on how much I talk. Let's just get on with the story.))
CHAPTER 6
(Loading screen)
Sonic: I'm waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaitiiiiiiiiiiiiiing…
Knuckles: It's not like there's much to load…
Sonic: It's loading a bunch of CRAP. The game is constipated, trying to give us its crap.
Tails: … 0.0 Why, Sonic. Just why.
Sonic: *shrugs* It does makes sense.
Tails: …Touche.
(Soleanna Castle Town hub world)
Sonic: *running in circles* Check out this frame rate, isn't it simply AMAZING?
Tails: *follows his every movement as if on in invisible string, jumping at random times*
Sonic: *zig zags all across the stage, running into trees and buildings* WHOOP
Arumakan: FOCUS!
Sonic: Oh, right. *goes to old man*
Alberto Robert: (Ohohoho!) *wild random hand motions* Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh. Mehmehmehmehmehmehmeh. Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh! (Direct translation: My name is Alberto Robert, and I've been making shoes in this town for a very long time. I'm making the ultimate shoes now. These shoes use the power of Soleanna's mysterious stones to change…I'm calling them Custom Shoes!)
Sonic: Very original name…
Alberto Robert: *more random hand motions* Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh! Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh? (Direct translation: But there is no one who can test the full potential of these shoes! Is there anyone who can test the design of these shoes?)
Sonic: I could, I'm the fastest thing alive!
Alberto Robert: Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh? Mehmehmeh? (Direct translation: You will be able to do that? Really?
Sonic: *standing on the curb having a seizure as the old man is mehing* Yes!
(Loading screen)
Tails: What was all that about?
Sonic: I'm omnilingual, remember?
Tails: I didn't know "meh" was a language…
Alberto Robert: *angry hand motions* Mehmehmehmehmeh! Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh! Mehmehmehmehmehmhemhehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh!
Tails: What?
Sonic: He said, *crotchety old man voice, imitates his hand motions* You darn kids! You always have to make fun of us elders and everything we do, even the way we speak! Why, I oughta tell your parents that you're being disrespectful; you kids need to learn a few more manners these days!
(Pre-mission)
Alberto Robert: (Ohohoho!) *random hand movements* Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh! Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh! (Direct translation: Put on the shoes and go through the Rings! If I've made the shoes correctly, you'll make it on time!)
(Loading screen)
Sonic: Wait, what? It took twenty seconds to load just TWO SENTENCES? I could've figured that out myself!
Arumakan: Patience, Sonic, we're working out some bugs.
Sonic: *grumbles to himself* Some bugs…ha. It might as well be infested with bugs.
(First mission)
Sonic: It took fifteen seconds to load an entire mission instead of twenty for two sentences… Also, my shoes don't look any different. Why are the Custom Shoes EXACTLY LIKE MINE?
Arumakan: JUST DO THE LEVEL!
Sonic: *does the level no problem, reaches the spring for the few rings going straight down* Whoa, overshot that a little. HEY! WHO PUT BUDDER ON THE CONTROLS?
*mission abruptly ends after last ring is hit*
(Loading screen)
Sonic: Whoa! *falls harshly to the ground* Why'd you end it so soon, I was in the zone!
Game designers: *shrug*
(Post-mission)
Alberto Robert: (Ohohoho!) *waves arms erratically, and they look like they're coming out of their sockets* Mehmehmehmeh! Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh! Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh! (Direct translation: Amazing! They performed just as I thought! My Custom Shoes are complete!)
Sonic: Uh, are your arms oka—
Alberto Robert: *still waving arms excitedly* Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh. Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh. (Direct translation: I will give you these shoes. You will be able to use them.)
Sonic: Really? These shoes that you worked so hard on, you're just going to give them to me? Can't you sell them for profit?
Alberto Robert: *still overexcited* Mehmehmeh? Mehmehmehmehmehmehemeh. Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh. Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh. Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh. (Direct translation: Money? I don't want any money. I'm happy just knowing that they're being used. The stones that you can fit into these shoes are called gems, and you can buy them at the shop over there. They're very rare, but if you put one in these Custom Shoes, they will give you an entirely new ability.)
Sonic: If they're incredibly rare, why are they sold at a store for anyone to buy?
Alberto Robert: *still overexcited, ignoring Sonic's statement* Mehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmehmeh! Mehmehmehmehmehmeh! Mehmehmehmeh! (Direct translation: The best shoes in the world, worn by the best runner in the world! I'm so happy! Thank you!)
Sonic: *grins* I'm flattered! You're welc—Wait a minute…you set me up for this, didn't you!?
(Result screen)
Sonic: *does a flip and poses for the longest time while the score is racked up, his quills jiggling in the "wind"*
(Soleanna Castle Town hub world)
Sonic: *goes to the store guy*
Guy: Ey!
Sonic: Yo! *goes through and buys the Light Chip, goes to the dock where the line of rings are leading to the platform* How would anyone else get there but me…?
Tails: Boats?
Sonic: Mmh. *presses X, collects the rings with his…er…rear end, but goes too far and falls off/nearly falls off the island with the mirror* Whoooaah!
Tails: *dies, like always* Aaaaaaah!
*eventually goes through the mirror to Wave Ocean*
(Wave Ocean)
- First glitch -
Sonic: *homing attacks the robots at the very beginning, goes around the first set of dash panels, jumps over the next two sets, and walks around the loop*
Arumakan: *facepalms* Stop.
- Part two of first glitch -
Sonic: *skids across the water, defying physics (but is actually on a platform hidden beneath the water that's on a set track that makes that scripted track hard to go off of), slides to the loop-de-loop, "crashes" into the dash panel, therefor rendering it useless, and simply walks around the loop*
Arumakan: …How.
Silver: *snickers* No idea!
Sonic: I really don't understand... *tries jumping, but his feet barely leave the ground that he's standing upside down on* Hmp! *jumps* Hmp! *spams jump* Hmp! Hmp! Hmp! Why isn't this working?
Silver: *bursts out laughing* Do you want me to drop you into the churning, deep waters below that you can't swim in?
Sonic: NO. *spin-dashes the rest of the way around the loop-de-loop without a problem and then skids on the water again at a normal speed via the underwater platform*
- Second glitch -
Sonic: *accidentally crashes into one of the checkpoints, and when he stands up, he's standing on the checkpoint post, parallel to the ground*
Arumakan: *gets red in the face in anger* SON—
Sonic: It's not me, I swear!
Silver: *laughs* Missing these? *holds up his real sneakers*
Sonic: *checks the sneakers he's wearing, which have magnets in them that attach to the level's metal frame beneath the track and in the objects* This explains a lot, actually…
Arumakan: I'VE HAD ENOUGH! SILVER, SCRAM!
Silver: Byeeeeeee! *disappears*
- Third glitch -
Sonic: *on the automated section where the whale chases him* Whoa, that's a big one!
Knuckles: *cough* That's what *cough* she said. *cough cough*
Sonic: *runs along the dock, but at one point the camera can't keep up with him, and he misses the dash panel and flies off the dock into the water* Whoooaa!
Arumakan: CUT! JUST CUT!
Sonic: *flailing* H-Help!
Tails: *sighs, flies over and picks him out of the water*
Arumakan: Amy, can you check the dock?
Amy: *does as she's told, looks down where Sonic had slipped, makes a face* Eeeeuuuck! There's a squished Swiss Roll here! …And a rotten banana peel.
Sonic, Amy, Tails, and Arumakan: SHADOW!
Shadow: That's for waking me up last night, faker. *crosses his arms and turns his nose in the air with a distinguished "hmph!"*
((THIS GLITCH HAS SCREWED ME OVER SO MANY TIMES. THREE TIMES IN A ROW ONCE, I COULDN'T WAIT TO USE IT. Now that I made Shadow at fault with a Swiss Roll, I think I'll look at the glitch with a laugh if it happens again. XD Have you had problems with this?))
- Fourth glitch (in the Tails section) -
Tails: *lands on one of the rickety docks, and immediately the whale Sonic's riding on swims through, destroying the dock he's standing on, causing him to die*
Knuckles: *imitates Sonic* You're too slow!~
((I actually don't know if that's a glitch or not, it just annoyed the crap out of me, though it's only happened once.))
- Fifth glitch -
Tails: *hits the switch to close the gate*
Sonic: …. *jumps over the gate*
(Loading screen)
Arumakan: You forgot to say your line!
Sonic: *in monotone* Thank you Tails, you saved me.
Arumakan: Again, with more excitement.
Sonic: *overenthused* Thank youTails, you saved me!
Arumakan: Really?
Tails: He's just upset about Shadow, of all people, making him look like a fool.
Sonic: *glowering* You said it. Now it's my turn.*stalks up to Shadow and shoves a pie in his face*
Shadow: … *starts to wipe his eyes, looking angry*
Tails: Sonic, I wouldn't—
Sonic: *throws another one in his quills, making sure to smear it around so it'll be hard to get out*
Shadow: … *wipes his face, now furious, a red aura forming around him* Now you're gonna get it.
Sonic: *sweat drops form on his brow, takes a step back, laughs nervously* S-sorry about that…
Shadow: *lunges at him* GRAAAAAH!
Sonic: Gotta go! *dashes off just as the level finishes loading*
(Mach-Speed Section)
Sonic: Darn! We're not gonna make it! Let's speed up! *hits the ground running, actually being chased by Shadow, and every time he hits something and dies, he "breakdances" or kind of scramble around in a circle until the screen fades out*
Knuckles: Drop the base! *plays dubstep over the radio, and Sonic starts actually breakdancing to it*
Arumakan: *sighs* I've had enough. Someone get me another coffee.
- Second try -
Sonic: Darn! We're not gonna make it! Let's –
Shadow: Gotcha! *tackles him and rubs Sonic's face in the sand*
Sonic: Mmmmphmmph!
Shadow: Say you're sorry! *lets him up*
Sonic: ….You're sorry. *smirks, only to get sand in his mouth after his head is ground in the beach once again*
Arumakan: What are you guys, five?! Take ten and you all better come back with better attitudes!
Shadow: Hmph! *gets off Sonic*
Sonic: Bleeeehck! *wipes sand off his tongue on his way to the bathroom to wash out his mouth*
((That's all I really want to do with this chapter!
Keep in mind that Sonic '06 is FULL of glitches, and I won't go through all of them, I'll just go through ones I've experienced and the major ones. If I miss any, I apologize; I just don't know every single glitch in the game to explain every one. Also, there are some really small glitches that I just have no explanation for or are too minor to put in the story, like the Light Speed Dash not working, or just causing him to jump on the railing and almost falling off, or the seizure camera glitches. Although, the camera glitches are pretty frequent ones, I'll see if I can come up with a reason for that. I already have ideas. XD Anyway, if I were to do EVERY glitch, this story would be a LOT longer and be much more boring. Bear with me, though, I'm doing my best.
However, if there are major glitches that do happen frequently that I'm missing, leave a review or PM me these glitches, and I will edit the chapter so I can include them. I'm no expert at the game and, as previously stated, haven't gotten past the first level, I'll need your help to find them. There's some in every level, right?
Anyway, thanks for reading! I had fun writing it, and I got a few kicks out of it when I came up with new ideas, so I certainly hope you guys enjoyed it! If you have any suggestions or ideas for reasons as to why glitches occur and what bloopers to put in the cutscenes, please feel free to leave a review for suggestions. I'm pretty happy with how this story is turning out, and I will try to post on it more often. Granted, it takes me a while to write each chapter as I'm trying to play the game and watch LPs and look up glitches and so on while writing, so again, bear with me. I can only do so much. Plus, I'm writing several other stories as well as this one, so you could check those out in the mean time! They're darker and more story-based, but I think you'll enjoy them.
That's just some stuff I needed to cover. In the coming chapters, I won't talk as much, my apologies. Bye for now!))
~SonicTheHedgehog-Nerd