Leonardo woke up slowly, praying that it was earlier in the morning than it felt. He glanced at the glowing numbers on his watch and sighed. 6:48. Which means I'm already a little late. Despite arriving home at a decent hour, sleep had been extremely difficult. His red-masked brother had avoided their room altogether, leaving Leo to wonder if Raphael had gone back out. He'd refused to go looking for him, regardless. I didn't want to fight anymore last night. Things have felt so tense lately. We're fine one moment, and Raph is exploding in the next. It's like living with a ticking time bomb.
Leo peered over the edge of the bunk, and saw his brother buried under his blankets. So he did eventually come in. He didn't want to wake Raphael up, but the red-masked turtle was supposed to be responsible for taking care of Splinter that morning.
"Raph? Wake up." When his brother didn't respond, Leo nudged his side. "C'mon, Bro. It's time."
Raphael exhaled shakily. "Gimme a couple more minutes," he murmured sleepily.
"Okay. I'm going downstairs to get Sensei's tea started."
"All right. I'll be down in a little bit."
The blue-masked turtle silently descended the stairs and crossed through the empty living area into the kitchen. He filled a kettle with water and set it to boil, then reached into the cabinet to retrieve a box of tea leaves. Leo leaned against the counter while he waited for the water to heat up, dropping the container of leaves on the top of it. I'm so sick of being tired. It's probably too much to ask for one day of peace though, isn't it?
When the kettle was ready he threw in the leaves to steep, and sat down at the kitchen table to wait for Raphael to appear. He bleakly watched the minutes tick away on the clock. The tea had been submerged for more than long enough, but there was no sign of his brother coming downstairs. Leonardo rolled his eyes and got to his feet. I'll take Sensei his tea myself and let him start on it while I make a little breakfast. It's not worth messing with Raph now.
The living area was still cold and devoid of life when he reentered the space and headed for his Master's quarters. Leo heard the sound of Splinter's wheezing before he even opened the door.
"Sensei? Are you all right?"
The rat didn't look up while Leonardo entered the room, but his small frame was straining, working harder for oxygen than he should have needed to.
"Sensei, can you breathe?" Leonardo hurriedly set the tea on the side-table and helped his Master sit up. The violence with which the rat shuddered made fear leap up in the turtle's gut.
"Don—Don—" Splinter gasped.
The blue-masked turtle straightened instantly. "I'll get him, Master!"
He dashed out of the room and exhaled sharply when he saw Donny and Mike already on the overlook. "Don! Sensei needs you – he's having serious trouble breathing!"
The purple-masked turtle was down the steps in three strides, but Mike hesitated.
"Leo, should I call someone?"
Leonardo shook his head. "Just hold on a second, Mikey! I'll be right back."
By the time he returned to Splinter's quarters, his younger brother already had an arm around their Sensei and was calmly assessing his condition.
"…remember, just like Marcus said. Relax your neck and shoulders, Master. Keep your mouth closed and breathe in for a couple of seconds through your nose."
Leo knew that he was serving no purpose, but he stood rooted to his spot anyway.
"Okay, now purse your lips and breathe out…out…All right. That's long enough. Let's do that a couple more times, and I'll set up another breathing treatment for you."
Instead of connecting with Donatello, Splinter's eyes sought out Leonardo. "My son…go." The command was clear, even if there wasn't real strength behind it.
"Father, I don't want to leave you," Leo said quietly.
"I said go!" The way the rat choked on the last word made Leonardo cringe.
Donny gave the blue-masked turtle an apologetic glance. "Leo, it's okay. I'll tell you if I need help. Just go. It's okay," he repeated.
Leonardo backed out of the room slowly, shoulders slumping as though a hundred pound weight was crushing them.
"Leo? What's going on?" Mike demanded.
He gazed at his youngest brother for a long silent moment. Throughout the five-month ordeal with their Master, Mike had been the most positive influence by far, a fact that didn't surprise Leo in the least. The cold fear reflecting in the orange-masked turtle's eyes made him realize something in an instant.
Mike's been hiding his concern – that's all…Doing his best to put on a good face for everyone and hold onto hope. What am I supposed to say to him? How can I make him feel better when I can't even do that for myself?
"Leo?"
"He's having some trouble breathing this morning, that's all. Don knows what he's doing." Leonardo felt his brother's gaze tracking him as he walked to the couch and dropped heavily on a cushion.
"Leo, are you scared?"
He wasn't ready to handle the question and couldn't control his rising emotions. Leo rubbed his eyes fiercely to mask the tears that almost escaped and looked over at Mike. "Yeah…I am, but it's more than that." Leonardo sighed deeply. "I want to be there for Sensei, but…he's pushing me away. And I don't know if he just doesn't want me to see him like this, or…"
Leo trailed off, resting his forehead in his hand. "I'm so tired, Mike. I can't do anything for Sensei. I can't even hold this team together. Raph is barely sharing a room with me. I'm not sure how much longer I can keep this up."
Michelangelo sat down on the edge of the couch. "Leo, I don't…You're always kinda taking too much on yourself. Everyone's got a breaking point, and that means you do too. We're all under pressure, right? And we deal with it in different ways. I don't think Sensei's really trying to get rid of you, Bro. As for Raph…that chip has been on his shell for years."
Mike paused for a second. "Now, I'm not saying you don't need to try to get along with Raph better. But you shouldn't take all the blame for it either. Everything doesn't rest on you, Leo."
"Mikey, sometimes I can't help feeling like it does."
Leonardo was half-heartedly watching Mike taking his car for a spin on the Xbox when Raphael finally came down the steps. He couldn't resist glancing at his watch, and clenched his jaw furiously when he realized that it was almost 11am. His red-masked brother's gaze met him, and he had to bite his tongue to keep from saying something.
"I didn't mean to fall back asleep," Raph said, already defensive. The tone of his throat was scratchy, as if he'd had a long night of his own.
"Doesn't matter," Leo said evenly. "We took care of things."
"I didn't do it on purpose."
"I didn't say you did, Raph. Please don't put words in my mouth. I didn't do anything to you."
Raphael's expression faltered. "I'll take my turn tonight, okay?"
The blue-masked turtle nodded stiffly. He didn't want to ask his brother any questions, but there was something very odd about the way Raphael was carrying himself as he shuffled across the living area. "Did you get any real sleep last night?"
Raphael stopped in his tracks. "I'm sorry, Leo." The apology dripped with disdain. "I already told you I'd take my turn."
"That's not what I asked you. Where were you last night? Where did you go?"
"What does it matter? I'm here. I made a mistake this morning, an honest mistake. Can I make one of those without having to play twenty questions with you?"
Leonardo clenched his fists at his side and didn't respond.
"Am I free to leave the room, or do you wanna get all of this outta your system at once? You might have more energy to lecture me if you tried it in stages, Leo."
Leonardo closed his eyes briefly. "Your attitude toward me makes no sense. I didn't ream you out. I didn't demand answers. You look rough, and I was wondering why –that's all!"
"You don't have to know everything," Raphael retorted, and headed for the kitchen without looking back.
The oldest turtle had a hard time not plunging his fist against the coffee table. "Am I doing this wrong? Am I not supposed to care what Raph does, Mike? I'm about to go insane!"
"Let him go, Leo," Mike said quietly. "If something's wrong with him, it'll come out eventually. Just let him have his space."
"He can have all the space he wants, because I'm sick of screwing with him." Leonardo spun to leave the room, and was surprised when his brother caught him by the arm.
"Leo, don't take this personally. It's probably not about you."
Leonardo shook his head. "He has a problem with me whether I ask him questions or I simply let him slide. You were sitting here the whole time, Mike. How is it not personal?"
Mike didn't release his wrist. "Don't give up on him, Bro. Remember we're all dealing with things in our own way."
The blue-masked turtle sighed and put his other arm around Michelangelo. "We're a team, Mikey. That's not going to change. I'm not writing Raph off – I'm just trying to give him what he wants, which is for me to lay off his shell for a while. We'll be okay, Bro."
His youngest brother relaxed under his touch, so Leonardo squeezed his shoulder for good measure. "Thanks for listening to me."
Mike smiled weakly. "We're all here for you, Leo. You can let us carry some of this."
"I'm trying, Mike. I really am."