Hey! So this could quite possibly be the most random of all of these, I got the idea for it when I was half-asleep, but I was cracking up while writing it, so I hope you like it!

Jack was awoken from a deep dark slumber and a fairly disturbing dream by a scream of complete and utter terror coming from one of his roommates' bedrooms. Jack sprung out of bed and ran to his best friend's room, the most likely source of the sound- Roger was the only one who ever woke up this early.

"Roger, what is it?" He yelled when he ran in. Roger was curled up in the corner, hugging his knees and rocking back and forth, his eyes wide with fear.

"It was...horrible." Was all he could manage to say.

"What? What was?" Roger raised a quaking arm to point to his laptop, which sat innocently on the floor a few feet away.

"Oh God, Roger, what happened? Did you accidentally click on cartoon porn? Did an old perv try to chat with you?" Roger shook his head. "Did Bill try to friend you on Facebook again?" Roger just shook his head again. "Oh my fucking God, you Google searched Maurice didn't you? God damn it Roger, what did we tell you about that?"

"No, no, it's not that it's- hey wait a second!" He exclaimed. "What happens when you Google search Maurice?"

"Horrible things," Jack whispered, getting a sickened look on his face. He shook it off. "So, if it's not porn, it's not a perv, it's not Bill, and it's not Maurice, then what is it?" Roger gulped and paled.

"It was...FanFiction." Roger shuddered and returned to rocking back and forth. Jack stared at him in disbelief, then began to laugh.

"That's what you're so freaked out about? What's a harmless little story going to do to you?" He laughed. Roger bolted up and shook Jack by the shoulders.

"You don't understand the horrible things that I've seen man! You don't know how sick and twisted these people are, and that's coming from me!" Roger looked around to make sure no invisible people were listening in on their conversation, then whispered, "The stories were about all of us." Jack's eyes widened and he fell to his knees, shaking his fists and the sky.

"Noooooooo!" He cried.

"Yeeeeees!" Roger yelled back. "Why are we talking like thiiiiiiis?" Jack shrugged.

"It's dramatic."

"Oh, okay. NOOOOOOOOOO!" Jack smiled and patted Roger on the back.

"So, where is this godforsaken story that got you so freaked out?" Roger shook his head frantically and stood in front of the laptop.

"Oh, no you don't. This isn't meant for human eyes, Jack. It's not safe for you. I'm sorry." Jack rolled his eyes.

"C'mon, what's so bad about it?" Roger took a deep, deep breath, let it out, then took another deep, deep breath, which he held for ten seconds, then told him.

"It was a slash story Jack." Jack stared at him blankly.

"What's slash?" Roger shuddered, and then, about five deep, deep breaths later, explained it to him.

"It was about you. And Ralph. Being gay. Together." Jack's eyes widened again, and he once again fell to his knees, shaking his fists at the sky.

"WHYYYYYY?" He yelled dramatically. Roger applauded. Then Robert came running into the room.

"What's all the yelling about?" He asked. Then he looked from Jack, still on his knees on the ground, to Roger, standing in front of him, and turned red. "Oh. So you guys are like that now." Jack sprung to his feet and Roger pushed him far away.

"Ew, nasty dude!" Jack yelled.

"That's just wrong, on so many levels." Roger agreed. "Mostly 'cause I'm straight, but also because I'm way out of his league."

"Hey!" Jack cried indignantly.

"All right all right, so if you're not being all homosexual together, and by extension, Maurice and I don't have to move out to avoid the awkwardness of having to hear you to being homosexual together, then what's the problem?" Robert asked. Jack and Roger looked at each other uncomfortably.

"Roger found something disturbing on the internet," Jack explained.

"Oh no, was it the picture?" Roger cocked his head to the side in innocent confusion.

"What picture?" Jack's eyes widened in alarm.

"No, Roger, no!" But he was too late. Robert whipped out a picture- seemingly out of nowhere. It showed Maurice, asleep and drunk as a skunk, sprawled on the floor with a bottle of beer in his hand and wearing nothing but a party hat- and in Roger's room no less!

"This picture!"

"Gaaaaah!" He screamed. "It's hideous!"

"Why, Roger? Why the hell would you ask that question?" Jack exclaimed, covering his eyes to sheild them from the nastiness.

"Oh god, oh god, I think I've gone blind!" Roger moaned. Robert stuffed the picture in his back pocket.

"It's gone, it's gone!"

"Why would you do that to us Robert?" Jack asked angrily.

"And more importantly, why would you carry a naked picture of Maurice around with you?" Roger added. Jack looked at both of them and nodded.

"Yea, why is that?"

"Soooo," Robert said, expertly changing the subject. "What was Roger's horrible internet discovery?"

"FanFiction," Roger whispered, sounding frightened.

"Did somebody say FANFICTION?" A voice cried out. Then Bill came prancing in, singing, "La dee do, la dee do!" They all looked at him in fear. "I looooove FanFiction!" He exclaimed. Their expressions stayed fearful.

"Bill," Roger said slowly. "How did you get in here?" Bill smiled and stepped closer.

"I'm always here Roger. For you." He said creepily. Roger backed into the corner.

"Mother of FUCK!" He exclaimed. Bill looked at him curiously, then shrugged and looked at the computer screen.

"So what FanFiction were you guys looking at?" He scrolled across the screen, then his face lit up in a big smile. "Hey! I wrote this!" Jack backed into a different corner, looking just as disturbed as Roger.

"You crazy ass motherfucker!" He exclaimed. "Why the HELL would you write that?" Bill smiled innocently.

"Because you and Ralph are meant to beeeeeee!" He cried. "See? Just look how happy you two would be together!" He then looked up some fan art and showed it to them. Robert, Roger, and Jack, all screamed bloody murder and Maurice came running in.

"What, where's the fire?" He asked in a panic. The boys all looked at him, got the image of the picture stuck in their heads, and shuddered. Maurice looked confused. "What?" They all just shuddered again.

Haha, that was fun. I'm not sure why Bill was a freaky stalker, I hadn't planned for him to be one, but he is now. I hope you all liked it. I've been having trouble coming up with funny stuff recently, so it'd be really nice if you guys gave me suggestions for what you want to see in upcoming chapters in the reviews! Okay, so please review. Yup.