AN: I just discovered the Stefan the Bamon Fanboy tumblr tag and I had to contribute. This fic does contain some Klefan because the gifset did as well, and even less Kalijah because I ship them. Don't like: I suggest you vacate the premises.
Stefan sat on the couch tensely. He was waiting for word from the man he hired to do a particular job for him. You see, it was only recently he found something that brought him boundless amounts of joy. Something he had invested a lot of time and money into: the relationship of his brother, Damon, and his friend, Bonnie. Stefan noticed the connection between them from the get-go, but Elena always made him not pursue his dream, his passion to push them in the right direction. However, he and Elena are no more. While Nik wasn't exactly happy about it, he wouldn't deny Stefan anything that brought him such happiness and Bamon, as Stefan called it, brought untold joy into his life.
Stefan smiled widely as he thought of the secret conversations they could have in one glance, the little touches that everyone else thought nothing of but seemed to convey so much for them, the way that they always seemed to team up to get things done without even giving anyone else a chance, the texting (which Stefan admitted to having printed records of stored away in his room). Most recently, to Stefan's delight, the hand-holding and hugs. Every time he saw it he felt like his heart would burst and he couldn't breathe, but Damon and Bonnie were getting suspicious of him. He thinks Caroline or Elena might have mentioned something to them, and so they make it a point not to be too touchy-feely in front of him anymore, which is why he hired one of Klaus' guys to spy on them. He used to do it himself, but after he crashed one of Klaus's cars while spying, his boyfriend put his foot down. Stefan couldn't do it anymore, but that doesn't mean other people can't do it for him. Just then, the doorbell rang and Stefan zoomed over to it and flung it open before the bell finished ringing.
"Hi Rex, have you got it?" Stefan asked, practically bouncing in his spot and the spy across from him thought that Stefan was tripping on something, probably LSD or cocaine, but he's getting paid to spy, not ask questions. Without preamble, he handed a manila folder over to Stefan.
"I think you'll be pleased with the photos, Mr. Salvatore," Rex commented before walking away.
Stefan did a happy dance in place before running upstairs to his bedroom and flopping on the bed to look through the photos. The first few were generic photos of Bonnie and Damon walking side by side, them talking, and Damon pointing some things out to Bonnie. Stefan squealed a little at the picture of Damon holding a door open for Bonnie, squealed louder at a picture of them eating at a diner table and laughing. Then he hit the jackpot. He felt like he was hyperventilating and his heart pounded in his chest because he finally had it: a picture of Bonnie and Damon hugging.
She had her head pressed against his shoulder and her arms snaked under his arms closing behind his back. His chin rested atop her head with his arms encircling her shoulders. He felt like he could die happy now. But there was one more photo. Stefan looked at it and sat up quickly. He felt tears welling up in his eyes. It was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. They were still hugging, but with one difference, Damon was kissing her forehead. He felt a small sob escape him. It was too much, his emotions were overwhelming and the feels were all over the place. He needed to get away from it. Stefan rushed out of the room and outside of the Boarding House, but he kept seeing flashes of the image, that angelic image, behind his eyelids. He pulled out his cell phone and dialed his boyfriend's number. It rang twice before his accented drawl rang out.
"Stefan, love," Klaus greeted, but Stefan just gave a stuttering gasp.
"What's wrong, love? Did you miss me already?"
Stefan froze as the image flashed through his head.
"Stefan," Klaus asked, concerned.
"He kissed her forehead," Stefan sobbed out.
"What?" Klaus questioned, utterly lost.
"Damon kissed Bonnie's forehead and they hugged and ate dinner together and he held doors open for her and they laughed together and I'm having a total feels attack. Oh, my emotions," Stefan explained through the tears.
"Oh no, here we go again. Shit," Klaus cursed under his breath.
"Why can't they see that they should be canon? They belong together!" Stefan lamented.
"Wait, how do you know this happened? Stefan, were you spying again?" Klaus accused.
"…No… I had Rex do it," Stefan answered guiltily.
"If you don't stop this, I'll send Bonnie and Damon away so you can't see them and indulge in your feels, Stefan Salvatore."
"I need them, Nik. Bamon is my life. I need them to survive," Stefan pleaded.
"If you don't stop, I'll do it, I swear. No more Bamon shipping until I get home," Klaus warned.
"One cannot just stop shipping Bonnie and Damon. They're my OTP. They are perfect for each other. They belong together. They're the definition of unresolved sexual tension and eventual true love. Even Katherine knows it, she said it herself 'hate is the beginning of a love story, not the end of one'."
"No spying Stefan or I'll take all your pictures away, delete your fanfiction and cut off your late-night Bamon shipping chats with Katerina."
"But Katherine is the only one who understands how I feel," Stefan protested, beginning to panic a little.
How would he survive without talking about his emotions with Katherine? Surely they'd both implode from the massive amounts of feelings coursing through them
"Stefan…" Klaus warned in a no-nonsense tone.
"Fine," Stefan agreed reluctantly.
"Good, love you."
"Love you, too," Stefan replied begrudgingly before hanging up.
At least I still have my pictures. Wait until Katherine sees, she's gonna die, Stefan thought, smiling widely before running back inside to admire his pictures once more.
Unbeknownst to the younger Salvatore, Damon stood in the bushes, shaking his head at his brother's latest obsession.
I knew spending extended amounts of time with all those blondes would result in some type of brain damage. Between Caroline, Klaus, Rebekah and Matt, I should've seen this coming, Damon thought.
Elsewhere in the world, Katherine's phone buzzed in her pocket. She screamed when she saw the pictures. Elijah zoomed-in, thinking something had happened. He was tensed and ready to fight or mediate if need be. He walked in and saw Katherine hyperventilating with tears in her eyes and he knew what was wrong.
"Really? Again?" Elijah asked, put off by his girlfriend's behavior.
This obsession of hers with Bonnie and Damon was more annoying than anything else, but unlike his brother, he had more patience to deal with it. However, it really was inconvenient at times.
"Look how beautiful they look together," Katherine gushed, her tears slipping down as she showed him the pictures.
"Hmm, I guess they look good together," Elijah conceded to placate Katherine.
Instead of calming down, she went until full-on feels attack mode, turning into a quivering, blubbering mess. Elijah Mikaelson cursed the day Stefan infected Katherine with this Bamon shipping illness.
AN: This was just for fun and not to be taken seriously, don't know where the addition of Katherine came from but I felt Stefan shouldn't be alone on his ship so Katherine is sailing on this ship as well and will go down with it just like Stefan. LOL.