Hope everyone's summer is going well. =)
Disclaimer: I do not own, just my plot.
~paperbackwriter9
It has been three lengthy weeks in London. And I am home sick.
The first week had taken my breathe away, with the plays we attended and the dances and restaurants. It was truly heaven to be able to be with Tom and feel care free. To also be with my brother Henry and Eliza was all the better. Yet as I enjoyed the dancing and food, I ached to think my poor Cassie was at home, helping mama.
So even though I had caught up on my writing and stories with all the free time I had here, I wanted… needed to go back. The problem was I did not know how to tell Tom. His apartment was lovely, but we never had a chance to lounge around. For Tom was busy with his work, and I wanted to be able to write when I could.
The conversations we did have consisted of London, our plans, and childhoods. Henry and Eliza fit into the busy London life perfectly, and at times I felt quite out of place.
Today, the sky was clear and the people were just as busy as ever, and I stared out the window in the dining room.
I shall only visit for a week, I told myself. Tom can spare me one week.
Just then I heard the front door open and Tom's voice call out. "Jane?" Quickly I lay my pen down and hurried down the steps and into his arms, where he hugged me. "What a day Jane, work was exhausting… How was your day my love?"
"It was wonderful; I have almost completed my book. A few areas need touching up, but I think it is almost finished," and he smiled and looked at me.
"I think I shall help you find a publisher," and my eyes lit up brightly.
"Do you mean that?"
"I had always planned to," and he smiled and kissed me, and it was not quite a soft kiss. He hugged me and I hugged him back, forcing myself to say what I needed to say.
I broke the hug and backed a way a foot, and then looked up at him. "Jane? What is it?" Tom was too good at sensing problems, and things I needed to say. It was the only thing that bothered me sometimes, but now he was interested, and I needed to tell him.
"I need to see my sister. I miss her and my home, I'm sorry Tom, but please? Only for a week," and when I finished he laughed.
"Why of course, I could and would not hold you back from seeing them. You need to only say when, and the carriage will be ready," and I smiled and hugged him. He looked at me after a moment, "I can not go with you," and my face fell, "I have work that must be finished, but I shall still be here when you return," and I laughed softly.
"Tomorrow I would like to leave, the earlier I leave, the faster I will return to you," and I kissed him, and he kissed me.
As the scenery changed from busy carriage and horse filled streets to quiet hills, and the forests, it was relaxing. Staying in London was exciting and quick paced, but as I stared out at the open space and could see the beautiful stars, I realized how home sick I truly was.
The carriage rolled on and I leaned back, seeing dark shapes and finally drifted to sleep.
"Miss? Miss Austen-" I opened my eyes and looked for Tom, only to remember I was headed back home. I felt an overwhelming sadness, but I told myself I would be with him again soon.
"Yes?" I answered and looked at Tom's driver.
"We have arrived Miss Austen," and he smiled and opened the door fully. The light made its way inside and I saw my home. My smile grew and I saw mama come outside, only to shout for papa and Cassie.
The driver helped me out and placed the two bags I brought next to me. I stretched and then I saw Cassie run out with a smile bigger then mine. So I ran to her and hugged her. "Jane! Oh how I have missed you," and then mama and papa were next to me too.
"Jane, are you here for a visit?" Of course that was the question my mother would ask first.
"Yes, I was home sick," and I hugged her, "are you not happy to see me?"
"Yes my Jane, how we have all missed you," and my father kissed my forehead. "You know your mother; she just wanted to make sure the wedding was still on.
"Of course it is! When I return I am going with Eliza to get fitted for a dress." I saw Cassie sigh but the smile was still on her face, and I did not say anything.
My father cleared his throat, "The house has been quiet without you, even with the changes-" My mother quickly elbowed my father. He looked at her and she cleared her throat, and put on a smile.
"Come inside Jane, you must be starving," my mother took my arm and I looked at Jane. She read my face easily enough and looked away from me. What was going on? What changes?
As we entered the house I saw flowers and the curtains were fully open. Much different from when I had left only three weeks ago. I felt a change with my family, and the house, but I could not put a finger on what it was.
"Let us eat!" My father said and I agreed, for I was starving.
After I changed and freshened up, we sat in the dining room and ate a full dinner. I described to my father the details of city life, and to my sister and mother, the details of the plays and balls, and shops.
"Your dress must be absolutely stunning, you deserve it," Cassie said and placed her hand over mine. "I would like to help with the wedding, but I can not," she said. It struck me that it was odd that she did not want to help, but I thought nothing off it until my mother gave Cassie a look.
"What is it?" I asked and the silence was filled with my mother staring my father down and Cassie shifting in her chair.
"Nothing at all dear," and my mother ate a bite of the cake that was for dessert. "So how are Henry and Eliza? Well?"
"Yes, they have been showing me the whole city, and the best places to dine. Eliza has been showing me the best places to purchase a wedding cake, and the dress. I am so excited, so Cassie you must try to visit me and help."
"I shall try," and she smiled softly.
"Why would you not? Do you have pervious plans?" My mother cleared her throat as Cassie opened her mouth to speak. "What is it that you're hiding Mama?" I asked and stared at her this time with a pleading.
"Your mother is trying to hide the e-" My father stopped as my mother stood up.
"Excuse me, Jane," and I stared at Cassie and papa. What was it? But they looked down and away from me.
I followed her into the kitchen and helped her clean the plates. "Mama, please I want to only help. Is it money? Tom would be more then happy to help, he has told me so himself," and she scrubbed the dish harder. "I am apart of this family! I have the right to now what is wrong!" I yelled and she stopped.
"Cassie is engaged," and then she looked at the dishes, but stopped cleaning them.
"What?" I barely asked. I had not left but three weeks ago, and she was engaged? Did she love him? Who was the him? "Mama, who is it?" I whispered and waited for her to speak. As she turned to me, she smiled slightly.
"Mr. Wisely," and she looked at me.
?!
"It happened soon after you left. Cassie was helping-"
"How in the world does Mr. Wisely deserve Cassie! She is the most kind, thoughtful creature and heart broken at that. This must be because she still misses-" I could not say his name, after her fiancée's death; I could not say it for the fear of Cassie bursting into tears. But this was not right, they did not go together, or match. I was no match maker, but it clearly was not a good fit!
"Jane! This does not concern you, be happy for her, that is the most you can do. You have been lucky and found someone who truly loves you, so do not think you have the right to tell her who she can not marry," and my mother's eyes watered.
"Mama," I said softer, "you do not want this either?" It was not a question, but more of a statement. She rubbed her eyes and starting cleaning again.
"This is not open for decision, and I am happy for my daughter-"
"Then why did you want to keep it a secret from me?" I felt hurt, helplessness, and sadness all due to the news, missing Tom, and my family wanting to keep something extremely important from me.
My mother placed down the dishes and walked out of the kitchen. She talked quietly and I followed her. "Because, this is what I knew what would take place. You would go and convince Cassie to break it off. Can you imagine what people would say after that? After you denied him, and then the almost elopement, do you know what the town would say if they did not wed?"
"So the whole town knows already? When did he ask for her hand?" I was still in shock. I had planned to come back and visit and disappear from the busy London streets, and this is the news I come home to hear.
My mother stopped by the stairs and seemed to look around if Cassie was listening in. "It only happened three days ago, and they became close about four days after you left. Please Jane, my nerves, I need to rest," she placed her hand on her forehead.
"Mama-" But it was no use arguing with her. I needed to speak to Cassie, and found out how this all took place. Did she love him? Did he make her happy? I admit I was too quick to judge that they did not match together. But this was my dear sister, who had suffered a lose so great, that her heart was and I still guessed, broken.
I only wanted Cassie to find someone to love again, with the same kind of passion that Tom and I shared, that she had once shared. But did she love him? I looked in the dining room but saw no one. So I headed to the stairs and heard my father and mother discussing something. I looked in Cassie's room, and sure enough she was there, sitting looking out the window.
Knocking, I pushed the door open wider and she jumped. A tear rolled down her cheek. "Oh Jane, come in, I was only day dreaming, well it is the night but-" She talked and laughed, but I could sense the sadness behind her jumbled words.
I sit on the bed across from her she looked at me, with no false smiles. "Cassie-"
"How I miss him Jane, it hurts, horribly," and she started to sob, and my heart ached for her. "I assume, no I know, mama told you the news. It is true," and I could not speak. "It is good for the family, good for me," she stared up at me trying to plead for a good answer.
"It-" I cleared my throat, "it is wonderful," and I folded my hands on my lap. How I wish I could say what I truly thought but that would make things worse. Her smiled grew a slight amount and she sat on the bed next to me. "Tell me how it happened," I said calmly.
She smiled and I felt my heart crack for her as I looked at that smile. She would never share that smile with someone she truly loved, like how Tom and I do.
Stop.
I told myself, maybe there was love between them after all. So I turned to her to listen to the story that would be changing her life, and mine.
I am so excited to write the next chapter! =)
Thank you for reading and reviewing! It means A LOT.
And yes, this is very different from her real life, but again it is a fan/fic(: