Disclaimer: Please read Prologue for full disclaimer.
Chapter II: Memories and Pagh
"Weak!" A shadow shouts. Another shadow descends and another till the words fade in a jumbled mass of confusion. "Weakling!" A different shadow emphasizes with a punch. "How dare you defy us?" The four shadows turn in unison and stare at the face of a witness to their depravity. Silence, shock, panic form within her as she hears. "Look at her, look at your child! Now, she knows that she is a part of a weak species! You. Are. Nothing." The heartbeats in the room become one less. Shadows laugh. They dance. His witness tries to scream, but her voice does not come. Hands wrapped around the small throat squeeze. Shadows leap. The hands tighten. The eyes of the witness shed silent tears and look down to realize the hands are theirs. The primal scream is finally realized from the agonized cave of internal suffering. "Noooo! Father!"
Beat. Beat. Beat. Brown eyes open and blink to try to clear the memories of the pain. The ears search for the familiar rhythms of their wife's heart. She hoped her scream was only in her nightmare. Then, she hears her wife's breathing change, and she knows that her hopes were not answered."Vunek! Laren! Please wake up." Her wife's smoky voice smoothes the familiar aches forming in her heart. Beautiful, loving hands gently caress her face and remove the tears of the 7 year old watching her father's torture. As tears flow and her mind clears, the dynamic rebel, Commander Ro Laren, snuggles deeper against her wife's heart.
"Vunek." Kathryn tries to get her wife to talk. This was the third nightmare this week, and yet, Laren was refusing to discuss them. She decided to try her command voice, because her wife voice was getting her nowhere.
"Ro Laren! I love you, damn it! Answer me, stubborn woman!" Captain Kathryn Janeway calmed her tone back to a respectable Force 3 Glare and shifted to look her stunningly beautiful and deeply scarred wife in the face. She lifts her chin and grey-blue eyes meet brown. They each smirk at one another until Kathryn yields command to return to being a concerned wife. "I love you, Vunek. You will always be my piece of heaven amongst the stars. Remember this when you want to shut me out."
"I will remember." Laren replies at a whisper. She still is thinking of her nightmare. How can something from so long ago still creep up and wrack havoc on her life? Will the pain ever completely leave? Why now? Then, her brain remembers. Her best friend, Chief Engineer of Voyager, Lieutenant B'Elanna Torres, is in a coma. That stubborn ass of a Klingon managed to get herself critically injured. She might lose her sister. The sister born of sweat, blood, torn muscles, fire fights and drunken nights might simply cease breathing again. Tears began anew as she struggled to control her rapidly growing anger as she thought of the situation. How dare the fool get critically hurt? She didn't have the right. She knew that family was a hard choice to have for a rebel.
"Laren, would you like some kava juice?" Kathryn moved to leave the bed and felt the trembling arms of her wife squeeze her closer. "We are talking tonight, and I am leaving this bed." She leaned down and softly kissed her wife of her lushly and intricately formed lips. She felt her wife deepen the kiss. "No, tonight we talk. You have been able to distract me one too many times with those lips and your body."
Ro couldn't believe her Kathryn. She needed the calming effect and peace of their lovemaking. Her wife was being unreasonable. "Kathryn, darling, we can talk later. Please, I need you. I…" As Kathryn leaned forward to kiss her again, Laren almost believed she had won this round. Then, she felt her wife pull back again.
"I need you too. I want to make love, and we will. Right now, this talk is more important. So, my beautiful, stubborn rebel, my Vunek, my wonderful lady from Bajoran heaven, kava juice?"
Laren sighed. Her wife could be so annoying at times. With her smoky tones and husky sweetness, she knew how to make even kava juice sound sexy. She would talk to her stubborn wife. It was time to release the power of her fears. If Lanna died, she needed to be prepared. This conversation would be the first of many.
Commander Ro Laren stretched as her wife leaned into her on the ready room couch. Their conversation went well last night, and it felt good to spend their lunch break in each other's arms. It still was difficult sometimes for the former Starfleet Lieutenant turned Maquis Rebel. She had wanted to belong for so long. She had thought that the Enterprise-D was that home for awhile. Then, Macias had seen something in her that she had never felt before. Belonging. The old warrior made her see that some clauses were worth dying. The next generation should not have to watch their loved ones tortured at the hands of hateful Cardassians.
Fighting meant healing from the destruction brought upon the Bajorans and others. To live was to defy. The nightmares would not win. She was loved. Macias taught her a new meaning for family. B'Elanna engulfed her with her fiery temperament and brilliance to discover a little sister's devotion and love. Then, Captain Kathryn Janeway had gone farther. Kathryn made her see love in the bleakness of despair. Being thrown some 70,000 lightyears from her home, the fight, and her peace among the Maquis resistance should have meant defeat. Her Kathryn refused to even consider it. Fighting without Kathryn's love was no longer an option. Their courting, marriage and combined command presence had bought Voyager through a lot.
Right now, Ro was having moments of doubt. Lanna had been in a coma for 10 days. Seven had saved her on the planet, but her body was deteriorating. In fact, the Doctor was not sure if she would make it through the next few hours. She felt her wife shift and looked down on the cherished face of her love.
"You can go to sickbay if it would help. I know you are worried." Captain Kathryn Janeway pulled her wife into focusing on her with her grey-blue eyes and continued to speak soothingly. "For your benefit and stubbornness, I will repeat my mantra from last night. You were right to send them, and I agreed. B'Elanna would have gotten worse without intervention. The hostility would have been detrimental to their working relationship, and Seven's move towards humanity would have slowed with the negative influence from the Chief on the crew. You know how many people love and respect B'Elanna. Her influence needed to be positive or neutral."
"I know that you're right. It is still frightening how close she came to death, and she still might die. It is all up in the air, and I feel lost here. May the Prophets and Kahless be with her, because I feel like kicking her ass when she wakes. She ran off half-cocked without even bothering to check storm conditions. Then, she gets stuck in some fucking pool of liquefied metals and other unheard of substances. What the fuck? Will she ever learn?" Laren was livid. She loved B'Elanna fiercely. They had been through a lot together. She was the little sister, who was brilliant, funny, crazy and wild to have around. It didn't hurt that they had escaped a few close calls with death to know they had each other's back no matter what. B'Elanna had to survive this stupid, storm infested planet's wrath. She had to make it. The warrior could not die this way.
"You are making yourself more upset. Go to Sickbay. That's an order wife. Dismissed." Kathryn smirked at her wife, kissed her thoroughly, hugged her tightly, and moved to return to the bridge. The Captain's mask fell in place as she straightened her jacket. At the door, she bent down to remove imaginary dust off her shoes. Her derriere swayed seductively. Then, she rose slowly and turned with a wink at her wife.
Ro smiled fully and started laughing. "You're a horrible tease, you know. You will pay for that later."
Kathryn laughed and blew a kiss. "I plan to pay for several hours tonight! Now, my Vunek, take your beautiful self to see your sister. I will go see her later today. Also, check on Seven if she is there. I know that she has spent several hours a day in sickbay over the past 10 days. I want her to know that we thank her for helping Lanna despite Lanna's attitude towards her. I think all this has been a lot for her. It would be great for you to offer her support. Maybe, you could tell her some embarrassing stories about Lanna. It could get you to laugh and remember her as the wild, untamed spirit that brings joy to our lives and others. The stories would hopefully have the added benefit of exposing Seven to a more positive image of B'Elanna. I think that they could be good friends if Lanna gives Seven a chance. Plus, I know how you love a challenge. Seven needs to know that we see her as a part of this community and her efforts on the planet were above and beyond the call of duty. I will tell her later about her commendation. What do you think?"
"I think that you are wonderful and brilliant. I will talk to Seven even if I have to track her down. The embarrassing stories would be interesting to explain to Seven. Plus, it would give me another way of thinking about Lanna for awhile and still honor my need to dwell on my sister. Thank you."
"What are you thanking me for?" Kathryn knew, but she also knew that Laren wanted and needed to say the words.
"I thank you for being an amazing wife, a great friend, and a person who continues to bring joy into my life when I only see despair. I love you. Now, go. I might be tempted to drag you back to the couch for more quality time." Ro watched as her wife turned to leave her ready room for the bridge. Then, she left quietly through the side door to take the turbolift directly to deck 5 and the sickbay. She would face the sorrowful looks on the bridge soon enough. It was time to visit her sister.