A/N: Whew. Long week. Last final tonight but I did get a chance to read all your wonderful reviews and see last night's NCIS episode. Was anyone else scrambling for tissues? Once again, thank you all for your kind words and reviews. Next chapter will be up much sooner, considering its the summer! :D

Chapter Fourteen

Baron can't come with me to see my doctors and therapist cause only special kind of dogs can go in the hospital. So Baron got to stay at home but that was okay because Baron likes playing in the yard with one of the yellow tennis balls that we play fetch with. He likes chewing on it too but I think his favorite thing to do is play catch with me because he'll play catch for so long my good arm gets tired through the ball for him.

First we went to Brad's and he made sure that nothing was wrong with my lungs. He asked if my throat was feeling funny and it wasn't but he only asked because Boss wanted to make sure that I was allergic to Baron because they didn't want me to get sick. But I don't think I'm allergic to Baron or Jethro cause my throat doesn't feel scratchy at all and I told him that.

After that, we went to the doctor who makes sure my head is okay. His name is Dr. Clarke but he reminds me of Superman once cause Superman's human name was Clark. He was really happy that I could move my hand around a lot more.

I had to go in this machine, it's called a CAT scan, and it takes pictures of my head. Clarke said that he would call Boss and me to let me know how the pictures look. The reason they still have to take pictures of my brain is because Boss told me that my brain swelled so much they had to take out a big piece of my skull so that my brain wouldn't be squished inside my head. That's why my head has a dent and why I still have to wear my helmet.

After the doctors, we went somewhere else to my therapy. My OT was happy to see me because Boss said it's hard not to be happy to see someone who always smiles even though I don't think I'm always smiling .

After that I had to write a lot of stuff but my good hand is stronger now and hardly shakes when I write, only when I get frustrated or try to hurry. My handwriting's not that good though but Boss laughed when I said that and he said that my handwriting was never good.

We went to my other therapy which is PT. There, I had to throw a ball and catch it in a glove with my bad hand.

I could throw really good because I do that with Baron all the time, but I couldn't catch the ball at all. I kept dropping it and I would get frustrated. I couldn't catch the ball at all.

And I didn't want to play anymore.

Gibbs watched as Tony huffed in frustration. While Tony could throw pretty good, his left hand just wasn't cooperating with him. No matter how hard he tried, Tony just couldn't get his left hand to close quick and hard enough to keep the ball in the glove.

"Alright Tony, try catching the ball and then rotating your hand around so it the ball stays in the glove," the PT said in an encouraging tone.

Tony tried not to glare at his PT. He knew that he knew how to play baseball but not matter what he did, he couldn't get anything to work for him they way he wanted it to.

The PT threw the ball again and when Tony once again failed to catch it, he reached down and picked it up. As soon as Gibbs saw Tony's expression, he could tell that the boy had reached his limit.

Instead of a sort of lob that he had been using to through the ball back to the PT, Tony used all his strength and launched the ball across the room, the soft baseball making a loud thwack against the glass window. The throw caused him to reel back some but thankfully, Gibbs realized, the chair that Tony had been sitting on did not shift.

Gibbs turned to Tony, a bit surprised, but not totally shocked, to see that he was crying. Before the accident, Gibbs had never seen his agent cry but ever since Tony had woken up, he seemed to cry more frequently. While Gibbs liked the fact that Tony actually showed what he was feeling, he wished that Tony…

"I can-can't," Tony cried. He was incredibly frustrated and sad at the same time and now, his speech was becoming more impaired, adding to the young man's frustration.

"Tony, calm down. It's okay, we can work on something else," the PT was kind with his patient. While Gibbs remembered his own PT having a "no nonsense" attitude when he himself did PT after being hurt, this PT knew that yelling and being gruff wouldn't help Tony-especially when he was in this state.

"I walk...want to pay...play…homeba-BASEBALL!" Tony yelled. He glanced at Gibbs, letting his anger and hurt be known, and was in the process of taking off his glove when Gibbs placed a gentle hand on Tony's arm.

"Hey Tony, how about we take a break?" The PT suggested taking off his own glove, "Would you like some water?"

"Broke. Blue. Water please," Tony said taking deep breaths to compose himself. Being frustrated didn't help at all.

"Hey Tony, you okay?" Gibbs asked knowing that the question was stupid. Tony wasn't okay. If he was okay, he wouldn't even have to be here.

"Ball. Broke. No," Tony used his good hand to wipe the tears from his face, "I'm broke Boss. I don't work right anymore."

"Tony," Gibbs said, taking Tony's face so the younger man would make eye contact with him, "You listening Tony?"

"Broke. Yes," Tony nodded as much as he could, worrying his lip.

"There's nothing wrong with you Tony," Gibbs moved one of his hands to rub soothing circles onto Tony's back, "You aren't broke Tony. You play fetch with Baron and you watch movies with me and you get to go eat pizza with Probie and Abby. You got hurt Tony and its okay if you can't catch the baseball. It will give us something to work on."

Tony stopped biting his lip and looked down at his hands as they played with the hem of his shirt. Finally after slowing his thoughts down, he looked back up at Boss.

"Ball. You think," Tony sighed and pulled on Gibbs' sleeve gently, "Fetch. You think Baron can help me play catch?"

Gibbs smiled and squeezed Tony's good hand reassuringly, "I think that's a very good idea."

"Boss?" Tony asked as he threw the ball across the yard, to Gibbs' waiting glove.

"Yeah Tony?" Gibbs asked, snatching the ball out of the air before flipping it to his right hand and throwing it back.

Baron, who had been standing at Tony's right, jumped in the air and caught the ball and danced around Tony for a few seconds before nudging the ball into Tony's waiting left hand and holding his position till Tony's gloved left hand closed around it.

Tony threw the ball back to Gibbs before continuing the conversation, "Fetch. Ball. Did I play baseball before?"

"Before what Tony," Gibbs fielded the ball and threw it back.

"Hurt. Blue. Before I hurt my head and got a bad side," Tony said, concentrating on closing his left hand before leaning slightly to his left as that leg tired more quickly than his good leg.

Seeing that Tony had tired, Gibbs walked over as he took off his glove.

"I think so," Gibbs said as he and Tony sat on the bench in the backyard, "You played lots of sports when you where in college. You might have played baseball."

"Good. Ball. Did I play sports when I was…" Tony trailed off, trying to find the right word, "shorter?"

Gibbs laughed at the question, knowing that Tony probably meant younger, "I think so. You played sports all your life."

There was a moment of silence, the cool of the evening settling over them. Gibbs watched as Tony played with Baron's ears subconsciously. The dog didn't seem to mind and Gibbs knew that this subconscious behavior was much better than the self-harming behavior Tony use to do before.

"Stop. Small. But not now huh?" Tony whispered suddenly, breaking the stillness of the evening.

Gibbs sighed quietly, before giving Tony a one arm hug, "That looked like pretty good baseball playing if you ask me."

Tony smiled his lop-sided smile at Gibbs and leaned into the hug.

"Hurt. Blue. I'm gonna get better," Tony nodded, using his good hand to rub his helmet, "No more Blue helmet Boss. And I'm gonna work so that my band hand isn't so bad anymore."

"Sounds like a plan Tony," Gibbs smiled at the determination of his ex-Senior Field Agent. Gibbs was thrilled to see that Tony hadn't lost his determination, "But it's going to be hard."

Tony chewed his lip in thought before responding, "Boss?"

"Yeah Tony?" Gibbs answered, turning slightly so he was looking directly at DiNozzo.

"Um. Blue. Stairs," Tony bit his bottom lip a little bit harder and glanced around, avoiding eye contact with Gibbs.

"What is it Tony?" Gibbs asked, squeezing Tony's shoulder ever so slightly to bring the young man's focus back towards him.

"Blue. You won't uh-won't get mad if I ask a question right Boss?" Tony asked, his stutter showing just how nervous Tony was about verbalizing whatever was on his mind.

"No Tony, I won't get mad, I promise," Gibbs reassured, trying to run through the list of things that had happened recently, hoping to guess what was on Tony's mind.

"Or sad?" Tony asked, cringing slightly.

"I can't promise that one," Gibbs sighed, "But I promise I won't stay sad long."

Apparently, the answer had been good enough for Tony because he fidgeted and stopped petting Baron, his hands clasping together before moving to his sides before coming together again.

Gibbs could tell that Tony was nervous but for the life of him, he couldn't think of anything that would grant this nervousness.

"When," Tony paused and breathed deeply, trying to calm himself down and focus on only say the right words, "I-uh-I know you don't like teaching-um-telling me about before but I-uh," Tony squinted, as if a bright light was shining in this eyes, "I-I-uh…"

He trailed off and didn't say anything for awhile. Upon seeing this, Gibbs reached up and squeezed Tony's shoulder again, hoping to get Tony to focus once more on the conversation.

"Tony?" Gibbs spoke quietly, not wanting to scare him. Even Baron, who had placed his chin on Tony's knee, had moved to lick Tony's hand in an effort to bring him back.

Tony focused really hard to say the right words and not the wrong ones.

"Did Kate catch the stuff I had that made me sick?" Tony asked quickly and quite loudly, slightly surprisingly the former Marine. Baron, who nuzzled Tony's hand, didn't seem fazed by the outburst at all.

"I," Gibbs tried to answer but really, out of all the things Gibbs was expecting, this had certainly not been one of them, "Tony…"

Gibbs trailed off, still finding it hard to process any words. Then, every so quietly, Tony shifted, focused on Gibbs and finished asking his question, "Blue. Did she die cause she got sick from me?"

Today I got to play catch with Boss. Boss and even Baron can play catch really good.

Catch is different than playing fetch but I don't think Baron minded when we played both because I think that Baron just likes playing with his ball.

But after we played catch for awhile, I finally asked Boss what I really wanted to know.

Because I remember being in the scary ugly blue room and I remember I couldn't breathe. It hurt to cough but I remember Kate was there and she stayed all night and she would keep telling me to cough even though it hurt really bad.

But she told me I had to cough because when I got sick, bad stuff went into my lungs and I had to cough it out. Even if it hurt.

But then after that, I don't remember Kate anymore. And I remember that the sickness that I caught was a really bad one and that it use to kill everyone that caught it even though it didn't kill me. But just because it didn't kill me didn't mean that Kate lived if she caught the same thing.

But Boss told me that Kate didn't catch what I got. That that's why I was in the blue room- that the doctors had to make sure no one caught what I had and even though I really didn't like the scary blue room, it was good that I was in there because it helped me breathe.

But Kate didn't catch the sickness from me but I know she still died after I got sick.

I want to remember but I don't think I'll ask anymore questions for awhile because when I asked about Kate, Boss told me she didn't get sick and then he went down the basement stairs.

And since I don't go down there, I couldn't follow him to see if he was sad.

But other than that, I got to play catch with Baron and Boss.

But that night there was boom and red again when I fell asleep so I'm not gonna ask anymore.