Seeing Bobby so… not Bobby, made me so sad. He had been like that for three days, just staring out through that window. After the demon incident and him losing the ability to walk, it must have broken him.
Dean suddenly appeared with a envelope in his hand.
"What's it been, like three days now?" Dean murmured.
"We gotta cheer him up."
"Maybe I'll give him a back rub", he suggested, making me roll my eyes.
Sam, although, didn't take it the same way.
"Dean", he said seriously.
"But what then?" he protested.
"Look, we might have to wrap our heads the idea that Bobby might not bounce back this time."
I nodded slowly, couldn't we talk about something else that made me not look at Bobby like a lost puppy?
"What is it in it?" I suddenly asked.
Sam wrinkled his forehead confused.
''What is in what?»
"The envelope, duh", I said, which made Sam roll his eyes at me sounding like a teenager.
Dean held up the envelope and pulled out a picture.
"I went to radiology. Got some glamor shots. Let's just say the doctors were baffled", he told, before he handed it to Sam, who widened his eyes.
"Holy crap", he muttered before I took a look on it and gasped.
I had seen that before, somewhere that had to do with the Bible, I guessed. And I understood it like English. The perks with understanding an angelic language.
"Talk about written like old school ", I mused.
Sam raised his eyebrow.
"You can read it?"
I shrugged.
"Yep, and I can understand Enochian speech fluently too", I responded.
Dean stared at me slightly stunned, before my cellphone rang. I picked it up from my pocket and answered with the usual:
"Hello?"
"Abigail, where are you?" Cas questioned.
I raised my eyebrow, couldn't he just pop in here? Oh, right, the sigils.
"Uh, we are at St. Martin's hospital—" I began before he suddenly hung up.
A pair of doctors went past us with some machine thingy when Cas appeared. And me, being me, walked toward him and gave him a hug.
"Since when do angels need to reach out and touch someone?" Dean asked while we let go of each other.
I rolled my eyes, had he forgotten about the carvings he just showed us and their purpose? Short memory, brother.
"You're hidden from angels now—all angels. I won't be able to simply—"
"Enough foreplay", Bobby suddenly said, which made Dean, Sam, Cas and me turn to look at him.
At least he talks, I thought.
"Get over here and lay your damn hands on."
Cas didn't move and nor did we. If Cas would've been able to heal him, he would've. So that probably meant that he couldn't. And why? No idea.
"Get healing, now", Bobby demanded.
"I can't", Cas replied and sounded slightly frustrated over the fact.
Bobby froze and turned his wheelchair to look at him.
"Say again?"
"I'm cut off from Heaven and much of Heaven's power. Certain things I can do. Certain things I can't", Cas explained and walked closer to Bobby.
And Bobby Singer didn't look happy, at all.
"You're telling me you lost your mojo just in time to get me stuck in this trap the rest of my life?" he growled and sounded quite or very pissed over the fact.
"I'm sorry", Cas apologized, for something he couldn't handle.
"Shove it up your ass", Bobby snapped and turned back toward the window and continued his glooming at it.
"At least he's talking", I murmured to Dean.
"I heard that."
Dean glanced at me before Cas walked back to us.
"I don't have much time. We need to talk", he stated.
"Okay", Dean said.
"Your plan to kill Lucifer", Cas started.
"Yeah, you want to help?" Dean asked hopefully.
"No. It's foolish. It can't be done", Cas said.
I raised my eyebrow.
"Thanks for the support, Cas", I muttered.
"But I believe I have the solution. There is someone besides Michael by himself or with Abigail strong enough to take on Lucifer. Strong enough to stop the apocalypse", Cas explained.
"Who's that?" I asked, which I felt that I already knew the answer.
Who else had Zachariah being frightened of? Who else but Him could resurrect a dead angel, who else would save us back there if it hadn't been the angels?
"The one who resurrected me and put you on that airplane. The one who began everything. God. I'm gonna find God", he told.
Every Winchester and perhaps one Singer stared at Cas stunned and a bit skeptically.
How the hell would he find God? If you asked me, God was quite done with his Creation. After all, he'd had left us with this mess instead of fixing it, and that's only one of billion or trillion of problems he could've fixed, but didn't. But I didn't want to destroy Cas' hope, not after all that happened.
"God?" I asked.
"Yes."
"God?"
"Yes! He isn't in heaven. He has to be somewhere", Cas stated.
"Try New Mexico. I hear he's on a tortilla", Dean joked.
But Cas, being the oblivious puppy he was, looked at Dean puzzled.
"No, he's not on any flatbread", he responded, making me snicker quietly.
"Listen, Chuckles, even if there is a God, he is either dead—and that's the generous theory—"
"He is out there, Dean", Cas interrupted, but Dean kept going.
"—or he's up and kicking and doesn't give a rat's ass about any of us", he finished.
Cas glared at him, and reading his face expression, he wanted to say something but just didn't know what.
"I mean, look around you, man. The world is in the toilet. We are literally at the end of days here, and he's off somewhere drinking booze out of a coconut. All right?", Dean said.
"Enough. This is not a theological issue. It's strategic. With God's help, we can win", Cas stated, his voice sounding harder and gruffer than usual.
"It's a pipe dream, Cas", Dean told.
That seemed to be the last straw for Cas, since anger flared up in his eyes and he neared Dean.
"I killed two angels this week. My brothers. I'm hunted. I rebelled. And I did it, all of it, for you two", he said, making me looking down in shame.
"—and you failed. You and your brother destroyed the world, and I lost everything, for nothing. So keep your opinions to yourself", he finished, the last sentence was barely more than a whisper.
I didn't say anything, what could I say? He was right, it was our fault that the Apocalypse was kicking, and I still blamed myself for letting the First seal getting broken. If I hadn't broken and hauled up Dean from the rack… But done was done, and now the only thing we could do was trying to kill Lucifer.
"You didn't drop in just to tear us a new hole. What is it you want?" Bobby asked, breaking the silence that hung over us.
"I did come for something. An amulet", Cas told him.
"An amulet? What kind?" Bobby wondered.
"Very rare. Very powerful. It burns hot in God's presence. It'll help me find him."
I raised my eyebrow, quite EMF-ish, according to me.
"God EMF?" Sam questioned like he had read my thoughts.
Cas nodded.
"Well, I don't know what you're talking about. I got nothing like that", Bobby responded.
"I know. You don't."
Cas looked at Dean, before he dropped his gaze to the amulet, which Sam had given to Dean for a good couple of years ago.
The year when we'd found out the truth.
"What, this?" Dean asked.
"May I borrow it?" Cas wondered, which surprised me, well not really.
If any other angel but Cas had said the same thing, then it would have surprised me.
"No", Dean refused.
"Dean. Give it to me", Cas said, his eyes full of seriousness.
Dean went silent before he took off the amulet slowly.
"Alright, I guess", he sighed.
Just before he was going to give Cas the amulet, he pulled away.
"Don't lose it", he said before he let Cas grab it out of his hand.
Looking at Dean without the amulet was like looking at a zebra without stripes, it was something big that was missing.
"Great. Now I feel naked", Dean muttered, making me smirk.
"I'll be in touch", Cas said before I took his hand and kissed him gently on his lips.
"Can't wait to see you again", I said and winked devilishly, making Dean groan in disgust and Sam stare at me horrified.
We were twins, after all.
A small light gleamed in his eyes before he spread his wings that had appeared, and vanished.
"When you find God, tell him to send legs!" Bobby yelled after a second when Cas was gone.
"Sam, can I talk to you?" I asked him carefully while Dean continued to walk to Baby.
"Yeah, sure", he replied and turned to look at me.
I had known him since the day I had been born, and I still got surprised over how much we looked like each other and still not. He was tall (Sasquatch warning, really) and I was average. Unlike him, I wasn't broad shouldered or bulky, I was more lean and "fine muscled". But we had the same hair color and almost the same eye color, mine were more green than his hazel though. And now we both shared that feeling that we weren't completely normal. He had demon blood in his veins and I was… I had no idea what or who I was anymore. My mind was the same, but that dark gap, the gap I had had my whole life, it felt like a black hole nowadays.
"I still… I know it's been days, but… I can't shake it off, you know", I began slowly and pushed away my hair.
"Abby—" he began, but stopped when I held up my hand.
"Please, just let me finish", I said.
"I mean, you chose Ruby over us. A demon. Over your brother and sister. What I can't understand is why? Do you trust us, Sammy?"
Sam's face immediately fell as he took a step closer to me, his eyes filled with sadness. I just wanted to cry and forgive him like a child would've, but I couldn't.
"Of course I trust you, Abby. And I would do anything to take it all back, you know I would", he said, making me nod certainly.
"I know you regret it, deeply, but still… Your family, Sam. Your family."
"Sam, you're my brother and I love you, but you are… I don't think I can trust you anymore. I'm sorry, but I can't."
We later went to Colorado, where Rufus had a demon problem, which wasn't a demon problem. It was more like Horsemen of the Apocalypse problem. And to be specific about which one, it was War.
He made us all see each other as demons, like Rufus seeing me and Dean as demons and shoving salt down our throats.
And poor Ellen and Jo, believing the other was possessed.
When we finally met War, he greeted me like an old friend, almost like he had met me before. That slightly freaked me out, just a bit.
Luckily, I had the honor of chopping off his finger.
"So, pit stop at Mount Doom?" Dean joked as he held up War's ring.
"Dean—" Sam began when Dean interrupted him.
"Sam, let's not", Dean told.
"No, listen. This is important. I know you two don't trust me", he said, something that made me look away.
Saying that to him yesterday, I felt bad myself for saying that, but, I wouldn't lie to him. None of us wanted to lie the other one's face, so I had said what I had to. Because it was the truth. The cold, harsh truth.
"Just, now I realize something. I don't trust me either", he continued, making me look at him with a confused face.
"What do you mean?" I questioned.
"From the minute I saw that blood, only thought in my head...and I tell myself it's for the right reasons, my intentions are good, and it, it feels true, you know? But I think, underneath...I just miss the feeling. I know how messed up that sounds, which means I know how messed up I am. Thing is, the problem's not the demon blood, not really. I mean, I, what I did, I can't blame the blood or Ruby or...anything. The problem's me. How far I'll go. There's something in me that...scares the hell out of me, guys. In the last couple of days, I caught another glimpse…"
"So what are you saying?" Dean wondered.
"I'm in no shape to be hunting. I need to step back, 'cause I'm dangerous. Maybe it's best we just...go our separate ways. You and I."
I raised my eyebrow, but nodded. I guessed that he hadn't been the only one thinking about it.
"I think I need to be alone a bit, too. I mean, get away from the Apocalypse a bit, forgetting that I can be used in this mess, too. That doesn't mean I don't want to stop seeing you. But, just for some weeks."
"Well, I think you're right", Dean stated, making Sam look at him surprised.
"I was expecting a fight."
"The truth is I spend more time worrying about you than about doing the job right. And I just, I can't afford that, you know? Not now", he said.
"I'm sorry, Dean."
"I know you are, Sam."
I rose along with Sam, while grabbing my bag (we had had the snacks in it) and was about to go, when Dean interrupted.
"Hey, do one of you, uh, wanna take the Impala?
I smiled slightly. Dean offering to let us use Baby, that seriously meant a lot.
"No, but thanks", I said while Sam shook his head slightly.
"Take care of yourselves", Sam said.
"Yeah, you too, Sammy", Dean replied while I touched his arm slightly.
"Just call me, anytime, both of you", I said before I turned and bid the Impala a silent goodbye.
See ya later, Baby, I thought and began to walk up the road, looking for that slightly broken car I had seen. Would work for some days.
I wouldn't totally ditch the Apocalypse, just take a break from all of it.
A Winchester vacation, you could say.
A/N: This chapter is slightly shorter and quite useless, kind of filler, you could say. But it's some itty bitty Abby/Cas, at least