Wife Swap

Chapter 7

Daryl took a step back from her and shook his head. "How tha hell would seein' a lawyer make me happy? You pregnant or some shit?"

Beth clenched her hands again and looked down.

"I don't fuckin' believe this!" Daryl shouted. "How tha hell could ya be pregnant? Whose kid is it?"

She looked back up at him with tears in her eyes. "I'm not pregnant, Daryl."

"Then what tha hell's goin' on? Why would ya go see a lawyer if ya ain't pregnant?"

She took a deep breath and sat down on the couch. "You've said you didn't want to be a dad, you didn't want there to be more Dixon's in the world so I thought I could…I thought I had a way to make us both happy. I went to see a lawyer to see if it would be possible for me to adopt as a single parent without us divorcing. We'd both get what we wanted. You wouldn't have to worry about the kid takin' after you since it wouldn't be your blood and I would get to be a mom. I've been thinkin' about that for a while and it's the only thing I've come up with but you don't want me to do that, I won't."

He snorted. "You're shit at lyin', Beth. I don't believe ya 'cause don't none of that make sense."

"Well," Beth shrugged. "Believe what you want. I'd never bring a child into this world knowin' it wasn't wanted but I thought maybe we….I could give a child a place to call home even if I had to go through an adoption agency."

"No," Daryl said, shaking his head again. "Hell no."

"Excuse me?" Beth said, standing up.

"You heard me. I said no. You ain't bringin' someone elses' kid home."

"You are not goin' to tell me what I can and cannot do, Daryl. If I want to adopt, that's my choice, same as havin' a baby. I'm sick of tiptoein' around you and your problems. It's not fair for me to make you happy and get nothin' in return."

"Make me happy?" He shouted. "You ain't made me happy in a long time. You best be callin' that lawyer for somethin' other than a kid."

It was over. She couldn't stand there and have him act like this. And since she didn't have a car or her phone to call for a ride, there was nothing left for her to do except to start walking.

He had stood there like a fool and watched her walk out knowing she was lying but about what he didn't know.

She wasn't gone five minutes when he decided he couldn't let her walk away. He wasn't going to admit he was wrong for anything he said but he wasn't going to give up this easily.

He ran out of the house and down the road until he saw her walking. He didn't holler out for her to stop, he just ran up beside her and grabbed her arm.

"Get the hell away from me!" She yelled and pushed him away until he let go of her arm. "I hate you, Daryl! Can't you see that?"

"I can see it," he muttered.

"Then why are you still here?"

"'Cause I love ya, Beth."

She scoffed. "Right. Because you love me. I'm beginnin' to think you never did. Maybe you are just like your dad and Merle. You only love me when I make you happy, when I put everythin' I want on the back burner, but you don't love me now because apparently I haven't made you happy in a long time."

"That's not true."

"Yes it is, Daryl. You never loved me, did you? You love havin' control, don't you? And when that control slips away, you hate it. Just like I hate you!"

"You're wrong if ya think that. If it was 'bout me havin' control, I sure as hell wouldn't have married you."

She wiped her eyes and laughed. "Yeah. I guess you're right. You're not the one in control, Merle is. Is that why he hates me so much? Because he thinks I should bend at his command like you do? Is that it, Daryl?"

He took a step back and she took a step forward, not letting him get too far away from her.

"Why won't you answer me?" she asked.

"That ain't why he hates you."

"Oh! So you do know why he hates me and yet you have continued to let him treat me like shit. You take the cake, Daryl. Best husband ever!" She shouted, throwing her arms up in the air.

"Why are ya bein' like this?"

"Like what?" she asked. "A wife who is sick and tired of puttin' up with her husband's shit or a woman who is finally realizin' she can do so much better than the piece of shit she married?"

Daryl's eyes widened and she could see that she had hurt him but she was past the point of caring. Yes, it broke her hurt and made her gut wrench when she said those words but she wasn't taking them back, not that she could anyway, but she wouldn't.

"You know, Daryl, there was a time when I never would have said that to you but that time is long gone. I'm not tryin' to hurt you but there's only so much of this I can take and I've reached my limit." She held up her hand when he started to speak. "Let me finish, please. I know you think this is all about havin' kids, but it's not. Not entirely anyway. I want kids, yes. I want you to be the father, yes. But I would not force that on you. We've had two chances at it and obviously it's not meant to be but I feel….I feel that no matter what, we'll never be the same. We're different now than we were when we first met. We're both older and we know what we want more than we did then." She sighed and fought back tears. "We're just goin' in circles, Daryl, and I don't know about you but it's makin' me dizzy. I want us back but there's no us anymore. I tried explain' that to Maggie but she didn't want to hear it, nobody wants to hear it but it's there. We all know it's true."

He was chewing on his lip now and staring at her with tears in his eyes but he nodded his head.

"Yeah. You're right. But we ain't got no way ta get in touch with someone ta come get us so we might as well go back ta that house."

She nodded. "As long as you agree that we're over. No more chances when we get home."

"I agree."

Four days later…

"Let me get this straight," Rick said. "You kidnapped your sister and your brother in law?"

Maggie shrugged. "Kidnapped is a bit too harsh, don't ya think?"

"No," he shook his head. "It's not because that's exactly what you did."

"It's not like I actually kidnapped them, Rick, and you know that so there's no need to worry."

"Maggie, when I get a call from both of their jobs sayin' they haven't shown up to work in a few days, then yes, I do need to worry."

Maggie groaned. "Can't you tell them you found them and they're fine?"

"Tell me where they are so I can see for myself they're fine and then I'll let their bosses know."

"Oh my God, Rick! Do you really think I would hurt either of them?"

He tilted his head. "Beth, no. Daryl, yes."

She snorted. "I would never hurt either of them."

He shrugged. "Well, I'll believe it when I see it. So where are they?"

Maggie gave him directions to the house she had rented and gave him Beth's and Daryl's cell phones so they could call their bosses.

When Rick pulled up to the house it was after dark and there was only one light on as far as he could see.

He knocked on the door a few times and when no one answered, he opened the door with the key Maggie had given him.

There had definitely been someone in the house but he didn't know for sure that it had been Beth and Daryl so he continued to look around.

Now, he didn't think Maggie would actually hurt them in any way but it was better to be safe than sorry.

Opening the door to one of the bedrooms, he called out their names and waited for a response. When he didn't get one, he proceeded into the room and after clearing it, he went over to the bathroom door and pressed his ear to it but again, nothing.

He turned the knob on the door and slung it open.

Beth had been expecting to be alone, she and Daryl hadn't said a word to each other since that day on the road but she knew he had left and she knew he wouldn't be back for a while.

She drew a bath, lit a few candles, and closed her eyes, trying her best to relax.

She felt the air shift and a breeze when the door flew open before she ever heard or saw anyone.

"Shit, Beth. I'm sorry." Rick said as she screamed and he turned around.

When he shut the bathroom door, she climbed out of the tube and put on a robe.

"What the hell are you doin' here and why didn't you knock?" She asked once she had stepped into the bedroom.

He didn't turn around to look at her but he answered her questions.

"I'm here 'cause we got calls from your bosses sayin' y'all hadn't been to work and you weren't answerin' your phones. And I didn' knock 'cause I didn't think you were in there. I've looked through the whole house and called out your names but you didn't answer."

"Oh. I must have dozed off," she said.

"So, where's Daryl?"

Beth shrugged to herself. "In the woods somewhere would be my guess."

"In the woods?"

"Yeah. He left this mornin' but I don't know when he'll be back."

"Okay, well, you get dressed and come out to the livin' room. I want to talk to you."

After she had dressed, she sat down on the bed and took a deep breath, dreading the conversation she knew was about to happen.

It was hard for her, as she was sure it was hard for Daryl, to know that almost everyone knew you were having problems and that you were failing in your marriage. It was hard and she wished she didn't have to talk or think about it anymore.

Daryl had seen Rick's car pull up to the house but he couldn't bring himself to go inside and face his friend or Beth.

He had been doing good at avoiding her but he knew that if he saw her, he would break down. He would probably beg her to stay with him, to not give up on them, but it was too late for that. He had screwed up so many things, so many times, and he had hurt her. He had never meant to do that but it was who he was and she knew that.

It didn't help things any when he could hear her crying long after he thought she would be asleep.

He watched the house, thinking maybe he should go in and face his her. Show her this didn't bother him.

Yeah, that's just what he would do.

He walked up the back stairs and into the kitchen, listening to see if she sounded upset while talking to Rick.

"No, Rick!" He heard Beth say. "You can't even begin to understand what's goin' on between us. Just because you've had problems with Lori and y'all are tryin' to work them out doesn't mean Daryl and I can do the same. We are way beyond that point."

"Beth, I didn't mean it like that. I just think that maybe you're givin' up to easily."

He heard Beth scoff at that and he knew she probably rolled her eyes.

He stepped into the living room and Rick looked up at him but his own eyes fell on Beth and he could see the way she tensed at him even being in the room with her.

What the hell had happened to them?

"Y'all are sure there's no workin' out your problems?" Rick asked him.

"Yeah. We're sure 'bout it."

"Alright," Rick gave him a nod and stood up. "Do y'all want me to take y'all home tonight or do you want to stay here like Maggie suggested?"

"Can you carry me to Maggie's?" Beth asked.

"Yeah, I'll carry y'all wherever you want."

"Beth," Daryl spoke her name for the first time in days. "Ya ain't got ta go ta yer sister's, ya have a home to go to. I'll jus' go ta Merle's, ain't like he's home anyway."

And she stared at him, eyes colder than he had expected.

"That's not my home, Daryl. It never was my home. I'll stay at Maggie's and in a few days I'll get Shawn to help me get my things and carry them out to the farm."

Rick dropped Beth off at Maggie's and Daryl off at Merle's.

He understood why his friend didn't want to go home. Home was a lonely place without the woman you loved there. And though Daryl didn't say it, Rick knew he was hurt that Beth had refused to go home, that she said it was never her home.

The next morning, Beth curled up in bed and wrapped the blankets around her as tight as she could.

She didn't feel like getting up and facing Maggie or the world today. She could just lay there and cry and wallow in her misery.

No matter how much she wanted to blame Daryl, it wasn't all his fault. She had pushed him away this time, pushed him so far that he really was gone, and she was the one who decided it was over, they were over.

"Bethie, can I come in?" Maggie asked, from the other side of the door.

"Yeah," Beth mumbled though she was sure her sister had heard her.

Maggie eased the door open and softly closed it then laid down on the bed next to her sister.

"I'm sorry, Bethie."

"There's nothin' for you to be sorry about, Maggie. This was all my fault."

"Well, I could agree with you on that but to be honest, it's not all your fault. Daryl needs some of the blame too."

Beth sniffled and wiped her eyes and Maggie pulled her sister to her.

"What happened between y'all?"

"You know what happened, Maggie. Please don't make me say it again."

"I won't," Maggie said. "When are you goin' to get your things?"

Beth shrugged. "Daryl told Rick he would let me know when a good time would be for me to go by there. I guess he's wantin' me to get my things out while he's at work or somethin' but Rick said he and Shawn would go with me to help load everythin'."

"Glenn and I will help out, too. Okay?"

Daryl didn't sleep a wink at Merle's. Sometime this morning he got up and found himself driving home. He wanted to grab a few things and get out of there before he called Rick to bring Beth over.

This shit was hard enough without having to see her.

He sat outside in the driveway until he couldn't fight it anymore.

The house seemed so cold and empty though all of their stuff was there. This place just wouldn't be the same without her and if they were really going through with the divorce, assuming he got the house, he planned to sell it and get the hell out of town before the ink dried.

He went to their room first, grabbed a duffle bag out of the closet and threw some clothes in it then carried the bag and sat it by the front door and went back to their room.

He turned the light on her nightstand on, opened the top drawer and pulled out the small jewelry box she kept in there and put his wedding ring inside it then laid back on the bed, on her side, and closed his eyes.

He reached out to touch Beth's hand and she jerked away from him.

"Don't touch me," she whispered.

"Beth, I'm sorry fer what I did."

"Sorry ain't enough, Daryl. You hit me and then you went after Rick and Shawn."

"Shit, Beth. I've said I'm sorry an' I done everythin' I's supposed ta do, jus' like you an' tha court wanted me to. What more do ya want?"

She shook her head. "You don't get it, do you? You did those things because you had to, not because you wanted to. When you come to me and tell me you're sorry for what you did, and you actually mean it, then I'll forgive you. But until then," she shook her head again and her voice broke. "until then, I can't be with you knowin' that you are everythin' you promised me you would never be."

He woke up with tears in his eyes and his heart pounding.

There was no denying she had every right to push him away for everything he had put her through and she would be better off without him.

And for the first time, he found himself actually thanking God they had lost their babies. Yeah, he knew it had hurt Beth, and it had hurt him, but why bring a child into the world knowing the cycle couldn't be broken?

Rick pulled up at Maggie's in his truck and honked the horn for Beth.

When she came out, Maggie and Glenn followed her and got into their car.

They pulled up to Beth and Daryl's place, followed by Shawn a little while later, and the five of them set out to get everything they could so hopefully they wouldn't have to make another trip.

Daryl had sounded upset when he called Rick to tell him he wouldn't be home for a few days and Beth could go by anytime she wanted to get her things.

Damn, they were worse off than he thought.

Beth showed the guys what furniture she would be taking with her, she was only taking the few things she had before they got together, and then she and Maggie went to the bedroom and packed up all of her clothes and anything else she thought she would want.

She went over to get her Daddy's Bible out of her nightstand. When she opened it she could tell her jewelry box had been moved and she knew Daryl must have placed it in there like that on purpose. She opened it, took one look at his ring then took hers off and placed it beside his.

"Which box is that goin' in?" Maggie asked, holding her hand out for the jewelry box.

"It's not goin'," Beth said quickly, then placed the box down on top of the nightstand.

"Okay," Maggie shrugged as she picked up a box to carry out for the guys to load.

When they had finished loading everything Beth wanted to take, they gave a few minutes alone inside where she took the house key off of her keychain and placed it on nightstand next to the jewelry box.

She couldn't believe this was actually happening. They were really over and she was really walking away for good.

A month had passed since they went their separate ways but neither of them had bothered to contact a lawyer. They both knew that if they took that next step, there was no turning back and secretly, they wished they could turn back, take back everything that had been said, everything that had happened, and just be them. Together.

Beth hunched over the toilet and threw up again while Maggie held her hair away from her face.

"I told you to stop after the fourth drink," Maggie said, sounding harsher than she wanted but Beth didn't have it in her to roll her eyes or give her sister any kind of a fight.

She was right after all. Maggie had told her to stop, that she had had enough but she kept drinking.

Maggie let go of Beth's hair when she had finished and handed her a wet wash rag.

"You can't keep doin' this, Beth. You can't keep drinkin' 'til you pass out and forget where you are or what's goin' on in your life. That's not how things work."

Beth leaned her head back against the wall and closed her eyes. "Oh for God's sake, Maggie. Can you quit tellin' me what to do or what I shouldn't be doin'?"

"Nope," Maggie stated. "I'm your big sister. It's my job to tell you what to do and what not to do."

Daryl was under his truck in his brother's driveway when a car pulled up. He silently cursed whoever it was but he slid out from underneath it to find out what the hell they wanted.

"Rick ain't here," he said when he saw Lori get out of the car.

"I know. He's at home with the kids," Lori said.

"Then what tha fuck ya doin' here?"

"I came to talk to you."

"Cain't ya see I'm busy?"

"Oh, I see it just fine but I also see your eyes are bloodshot and you're a hell of a lot skinnier than you were before. Are you drinkin'? Drugs? Or are you just not eatin'?"

He shrugged and wiped his hands on his jeans.

"What tha fuck does it matter?"

"It matters because Beth needs you…."

He scoffed. "Tha fuck she does. She's on 'er own."

"She does need you, Daryl. She's been drinkin' a lot lately..."

"Why tha hell are ya tellin' me this? She's over 21, she can drink if she wants."

Lori stepped closer to him and crossed her arms over her chest.

"I'm tellin' you this because she's makin' herself sick. She drinks all day and night, she drinks until she starts throwin' up or passes out. You need to talk to her."

"Ain't none of that my problem. If you're so worried 'bout 'er, why don't ya get with 'er sister an' y'all figure out a way ta help 'er?"

Beth had never been a big drinker so, yeah, he was worried and he tried not to let it show, but he was sure she could see right through him.

"It is your problem, Daryl. She's killin' your baby."

A/N: Just going to leave this here since some of you probably hate me for this chapter but if y'all want a happier Bethyl story and haven't already read my new one-shot "Just Fishin'" then you should go check it out.

And remember, leave a review!