I've been looking forward to this one. :) I've always pictured Shepard as a former (understandable given his circumstances) space racist who had a revelation (or lack of one if you go renegade) at his most notable achievement prior to ME1 (Elysium, Akuze, or Torfan). Elysium and Torfan are easy enough to write, I mean in both he killed a ton of Batarians and probably felt sorry afterwards. But Akuze… now that one is interesting; that one has the meat in it. That's the one we know the least about, and that's why it's my favorite! All the codex tells us is they found a settlement, set up camp, and then they were attacked by Thresher Maws, and only Shepard and Toombs survived! So much potential… I must stop babbling and begin the story! Mass Effect is owned by Bioware, now enjoy!

Ch. 17: Echoes of the Past Part 3

Normandy SR-2

Commander Shepard

Shepard gazed at the ceiling of his cabin for a moment before continuing. The stars overhead continued to fly past as the Savior of the Galaxy sat in his cabin with Tali in his arms. If he would have been in this very same position 10 years ago he might have spit in disgust at himself, saying he was hurting the image of humanity by being with anyone who wasn't human, but now...

Shepard lowered his gaze back to Tali. Her raven hair lightly brushed his neck as he prepared himself for what happened next. She was so beautiful... Akuze had definitely been a terrible experience, but in the end he had needed it; if he hadn't lost all of those marines he might have remained a racist pig and joined the Terra Firma party. And yes, every damn one of them was a marine, even her...

Shepard coughed, and began to speak again. "Now where was I? Oh yeah... So I had grabbed my gear, and began walking towards the ship. The ship we were assigned to was just a standard Alliance Frigate. It was going to drop us off with a Cruiser at its side, and then remain in orbit in case anything went wrong. If that ship had left I don't think I would have survived... But just when I was getting ready to board the vessel, I noticed something different, something I wasn't happy to see..."

Flashback

Vancouver Space Docks

Shepard quickly double-checked his gear. He had his standard assault rifle and pistol, and he had eaten a hardy breakfast; one thing biotics always needed to do was eat a lot! Shepard picked up his gear and began walking towards the ship. Shepard smiled slightly as he watched his marines filing into the ship, ready to take on another easy rescue mission. At that moment Shepard saw something that filled him with rage and confusion. His fatherly friend, Anderson, was walking up to the crowd with... with... a Batarian!? A Batarian woman!? What the hell was going on!?

Shepard's eyes darkened at the Batarian and he began rushing towards Anderson. Anderson was talking quietly with the Batarian until he noticed Shepard moving towards them. Anderson reached his hand out and glared at Shepard. Shepard stopped two feet away from them.

He continued to glare at the Batarian. "What is this THING doing near my unit? This is an Alliance military base, she cannot be here!"

Anderson shook his head and lessened his glare. "Shepard... Alliance Command is starting a new outreach program to help ease our relations with the Batarians. They want a few Batarian soldiers to come assist our marines in combat. Because Private Elroy Kinsley was injured yesterday we decided your unit could use the extra firepower."

Shepard's face didn't change. "You don't say a word to me for a year, and you think you can just show up and send a BATARIAN with MY unit? I'm not letting this piece of shit shine my shoes, let alone get on my ship."

Anderson sighed at him. "I meant to say hi, but you know better than most how stressful military life is. You have no idea what I've been through this past year... And Shepard, no matter what dreams you might have that isn't your ship. You're in charge of the marines, not the ship. The captain has already approved her assignment onto the SSV Sitka and you will address her as Corporal Fegarni Her'doh."

The Batarian woman saluted Shepard. "Proud to be here, sir!"

Shepard continued to glare at the Batarian for a moment. He then shook his head and turned to Anderson. "I didn't even know they let women into the Batarian military, I've only seen men in it."

Fegarni tilted her head to the right and glared at Shepard. "Just because we like to follow tradition doesn't mean women are forbidden from military service. I think you should be happy they didn't send a slaver in my place."

Shepard turned towards Fegarni and spit on her shoe. "You dare talk about your people and their precious slave crap again, and I'll make sure you come back in a body bag Batarian!"

Anderson pushed Shepard back. "Damn it son, get over yourself and get on the ship! You know if you did this to anyone else they would court-martialed you on the spot! She's going with you whether you like it or not, and you're going to make sure she stays alive. Understood?"

Shepard grumbled out a 'yes sir,' and turned to the ship. What the hell was Anderson and Alliance Command thinking? Letting a BATARIAN on an Alliance Frigate!? They could all get killed by sabotage, or incompetence, or the sick alien's stench... 'This mission just got a whole lot worse...'

SSV Sitka 1 hour later

"Alright men, all hands prepare for takeoff in 2 minutes."

Shepard half-listened to the Captain's announcement as he watched the Batarian woman with a small glare on his face. She was sitting quietly on a chair with a datapad in her hand. 'I bet it's taking holos for the Batarian Hegemony!'

This thought enraged Shepard and he stood up and took a seat next to... her. She seemed to ignore him as he sat down and continued to give her his small glare. This only enraged Shepard further.

"Batarian, what are you doing on that datapad?" He asked darkly.

Fegarni turned to face Shepard. "I have a name you know. Fegarni ring a bell?"

Shepard's eyes darkened. "You didn't answer my question, Batarian. You may force me to throw you in the brig if I have to ask again."

Fegarni shook her head and looked at the datapad. "I'm just studying the history of Akuze, you know the planet we're headed to? It says it's a very small settlement that was only recently colonized."

"Wow, what incredibly interesting and informative information! I bet I couldn't replace you with a pile of cow dung." Shepard said with dark sarcasm.

Fegarni didn't seem to understand sarcasm, however, and she perked up until she heard 'cow dung.' "What's 'cow dung'? Is that some kind of animal's droppings or something?"

Shepard rolled his eyes and continued talking in his sarcastic tone. "Wow, you're an amazing investigator! You figured it out all on your own! Maybe your slimy alien brain IS intelligent after all."

She quickly realized Shepard wasn't being serious, and glared at him. "I don't have time to listen to your bullshit Human, and I don't understand your jokes. Please sit somewhere else."

"No, I'm having a GREAT time sitting next to the four-eyed monster with 8 hideous noses!" Shepard said while continuing his sarcasm.

Fegarni snarled and turned back to the datapad. Shepard smiled at himself and got up; he was so funny. He noticed Red sitting quietly next to Toombs near the back. There was an empty chair next to them and Shepard decided to go sit with them. He still had a smirk on his face but kept Fegarni in his peripheral vision.

"Have you guys seen the new thing yet?"

Red turned his eyes to Shepard and then to Fegarni. He sighed and spoke softly. "Yes I did sir, yes I did. Come over here to complain about it?"

Shepard chuckled darkly. "Complain? No way, I should be happy! At least now we'll know why things went wrong when the mission's over!"

Toombs turned to Shepard with a confused look. "What, you think something's going to happen?"

Shepard turned to Toombs, but Fegarni remained in his peripheral vision. "Obviously something's going to happen, Toombs. If you haven't noticed we have a BATARIAN in our ship! It'll probably sabotage the engines, or try to shoot us while we're taking a piss. You never know with Batarians, you never know."

Red rolled his eyes and retorted with a thinly veiled anger. "Shepard please, just stop! You ever stop and think maybe she was sent here for a REASON? Like, maybe to fix your backwards head?"

The ship began to lift off and fly towards space. They all clicked their seat belts and waited in their seats until they had left the atmosphere. Shepard shook his head and remained silent for a few minutes, deeply disappointed in his friend. He was one of those lost idiots, and there was no way he could bring him out of the swamp of idiocy in his head. When he lost everything to slavers someday, then he'd finally understand.

Shepard then heard the captain give the all-clear and the marines stood up and began walking to their posts. They didn't have too much to do until they arrived on Akuze, so Shepard had an idea.

Shepard cleared his throat and spoke loudly. "Anyone who wants to play a little poker come and join me in the cafeteria!"

Several marines grumbled and turned away. Shepard was by far the greatest poker player they had ever seen and no one was ever able to beat him. Red was the only one who ever successfully gave Shepard a run for his money, but in the end Shepard always won. After a few minutes a few brave marines, including Red and Toombs, came up to Shepard's table ready to play. Shepard had brought his favorite poker set and they were just about to play...

"Got room for one more?" Fegarni said as she sat down next to Toombs.

Shepard glared at her. "This is a HUMAN game. I highly doubt you know how to play."

Fegarni chuckled. "Just try me Lieutenant, I'm the Hegemony's best poker player. The extranet really loves poker you know."

Shepard rolled his eyes. "Just get out of here."

Red nudged Shepard on the shoulder. "Oh come on Shepard, afraid a Batarian will beat you?"

The other marines chuckled at Shepard and he shook his head. "Fine, if you want our fun little game to be ruined be my guest. Batarian, we play for money so you better have some credits."

Fegarni pulled out a credit chit. "I've got some, now let's play Shepard."

'The alien thinks it can use my name...' Shepard thought as he started shuffling the cards. 'At least this will be an easy game.'

Shepard had no idea how wrong he was...

1.5 hours later

Shepard felt a bead of sweat fall from his forehead as he studied his cards. Red had just been taken out but the Batarian... The Batarian was winning! Shepard's anger rose and he looked at his hand again. All of his cards were spades... and they were the 8, the 9, the 10, the jack, and the queen. He had a strait flush!

'Finally!' Shepard thought as he mentally smiled, careful to preserve his poker face. "All in."

Fegarni almost smirked as Shepard put in all of his chips. This hand would seal the deal and Shepard's undefeated streak would continue!

"Alright Shepard, I'm in." Fegarni put in all of her chips. The entire pot was ripe for the picking...

Shepard smiled and put down his hand. "A strait flush! I hope you learned not to mess with the best, Batarian."

The other marine's eyes widened at Shepard's hand. There was no way Fegarni could beat that... unless.

Fegarni faked a yawn and put down her hand. Shepard's eyes widened in horror at the sight: An ace, a king, a queen, a jack, and a ten, all spades … Fegarni had a royal flush!

"W-what!?" Shepard could hardly believe his eyes! A royal flush! How in the HELL did she get a royal flush!?

"Good game Shepard, almost had me for a minute." Fegarni said while reeling in the pot. Shepard blinked a few times in shock at what he had just witnessed.

Red was shaking his head in shock. "Wow, the great Lieutenant Shepard, king of poker, beaten at his own game..."

The other marines remained silent. They didn't know what Shepard would do next, and it was probably a good idea they keep their mouths shut. They had never actually seen Shepard lose at poker, and the sight before them was one of complete and utter defeat.

Shepard shook his head and glared at Fegarni. "Take the cards out of your damn sleeves! I know you cheated!"

Fegarni chuckled and looked at Shepard devilishly. "What, can't accept the fact an alien beat you at poker?"

Shepard stood up and slammed his fist on the table. "Damn it Batarian, don't lie to me! Show me your sleeves!"

Fegarni looked at her arms and then smiled. "You know I don't actually have sleeves on this shirt right?"

Shepard shook his head, got up, and began walking to his quarters. 'God damn Batarian thinks it can beat me at poker... obviously it cheated somehow, maybe if I look at security footage...'

Shepard felt a hand on his shoulder. Red had caught up to Shepard and was smirking at him.

Shepard sighed and stopped walking. "What is it, Red?"

Red smirked at Shepard. "Do I hear the sound of defeat in your voice? Has the great Lieutenant Shepard been taken down a notch?"

Shepard grumbled for a moment then began speaking. "It obviously cheated, didn't you see? And how the hell can you read a face THAT ugly anyway?"

Red chuckled at Shepard. "Excuses, excuses! Maybe I was right after all, huh?"

Shepard grunted in anger at Red. "Damn it Red, can we please stop talking about that! Ok, I admit it, maybe pulling a gun out in a bar was a bad thing to do, but I was a little drunk, ok? And those aliens should really keep their hands to themselves."

Red shook his head slightly. "At least you realized taking out a gun in a bar is a bad idea. One step at a time, I suppose."

Shepard looked at Red, slightly confusion. "What do mean 'one step at a time?'"

Red smiled devilishly. "I think you know what I mean, Shepard."

Shepard rolled his eyes and started walking to his quarters again. Red shook his head and returned with a smile to the rest of the marines to talk about recent events...

Shepard closed the door and looked at himself in the mirror. How in the HELL could an alien beat him, the KING of poker, so easily? Shepard's eyes widened. 'This must be some horrible dream!' He then rolled his eyes at himself. Of course it wasn't a dream, in his dreams the aliens never bested him, they always lost! Then another thought occurred to him. 'That Batarian must be a cyborg! Of course, that's how it was able to know his every hand! That's how it read me like a book!'

Shepard heard a knock at the door and he turned to face it. He opened the door to see Fegarni standing in the doorway with a credit chit in her hand.

Shepard glared at Fegarni. "What do you want, Batarian? Come to gloat or something?"

Fegarni put the credit chit in her palm and outstretched her hand. "I just wanted to give you your money back."

Shepard's glare quickly mixed with confusion. "What? You BEAT me, why the hell would you give me my money back?"

Fegarni's hand remained outstretched. "Just take it, I don't need it. I only played for fun."

Shepard hesitantly took the credit chit and looked at it. Fegarni nodded slightly and began walking away. Shepard closed the door and turned back to the mirror, still gazing at the credit chit. His eyes widened again. 'Holy shit, she rigged the chit with explosives!'

Shepard threw the chit at the wall and jumped behind a chair. He cupped his hands over his ears and squeezed his eyes shut. He stayed like this for a minute until he finally opened his eyes. 'It must be set for when I sleep!' He thought as he walked up to the credit chit. He carefully grasped it in his hands and began walking to engineering. 'Maybe an engineer can help me.'

SSV Sitka Engineering Deck

Shepard gazed at the sign labeled 'ENGINEERING'. He had never once gone into engineering, and had never once talked to an engineer besides his combat engineers; this could get weird fast. He opened the door and hesitantly walked inside. Shepard saw the drive core humming and engineers busily typing on their consoles. Shepard walked up to the nearest engineer and cleared his throat.

The engineer, a brunette woman who was roughly 27, turned to Shepard and wiped her forehead with her arm. She then took a rag out of her pocket and began cleaning her hands. "Something you need, soldier?"

Shepard lowered his head slightly and began speaking in a hushed tone. "I think this credit chit has been rigged to explode, could you find out for me?"

The engineer smirked and shook her head. "A credit chit that explodes? I've gotta see this!"

The engineer took the credit chit and put on a pair of gloves. She then began walking towards another room. Shepard followed the engineer until she reached her destination. The engineer set the credit chit in an explosive-proof bubble and began scanning it.

After a minute the engineer sighed, clearly disappointed. "Sorry soldier, this is just a normal credit chit. I was so ready to disarm it too..."

Shepard's eyes hardened. "Check again, I know it'll explode. I got it from that Batarian!"

The engineer giggled and looked at Shepard devilishly. "What, do you think she's sabotaging the ship?"

Shepard nodded. "That's exactly what the Batarian is doing! I bet it's stuffing a bomb into the drive core right now!"

The engineer giggled again. "I haven't talked to someone like you in forever! It's so cute that you think you're right."

Shepard raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean 'someone like me?'"

The engineer smiled. "A xenophobe silly! I had really hoped they had been eradicated, but they remain. Still, it's pretty cute when people like you are proven wrong."

Shepard glared and grabbed the chit. "And it's really cute when engineers think they're hot shit because they tap on a console all day."

Shepard stormed out of the room and walked back to his quarters. Everyone was just so... stupid! Why was everyone's head put on wrong?

Shepard heard a small voice in the back of his mind. 'Maybe it's because they're head's on right, and yours isn't.'

Shepard felt the frustration grow in him and he stood in front of the mirror in his quarters again. After glaring at himself for a minute he roared in anger and punched the wall. No one could understand him! No one could ever understand the pain of losing your friends and family to alien scum! And no one seemed to understand the aliens needed to pay for what they had done to him!

Shepard again heard the voice in the back of his mind. 'Do they?'

End flashback

Shepard continued telling his story. "I remained in my quarters until we were deployed on Akuze. I definitely wasn't cured of my xenophobia by then, but the seeds of doubt had been sown in my head."

Tali smiled devilishly. "So, who was the engineer anyway? You never said her name."

Shepard shrugged. "I never asked, and I never talked to her after that. What, do you think I had a thing for her or something?"

Tali sighed. "I'm sure you didn't, she wasn't very nice to you."

Shepard chuckled. "Yeah, but I deserved it. I wasn't really a nice person at the time."

Tali raised her head and looked Shepard in the eye. "It's ok Shepard, the only thing that matters is you aren't like that anymore. Now you're a hero... and you're mine."

Shepard smiled at Tali's words. "I know Tali, but I still think you deserve to know the full story. No matter how bad of a time it was it's something you need to know about."

Tali put her head back down and snuggled closer to Shepard. "Alright, finish the story, and try to make it quick, ok? I'm getting hungry for human flesh."

Shepard groaned. "Tali please, the story isn't finished yet. You promised to stop that."

Tali sarcastically pouted. "Fine, I'll stop. You have to admit it's funny though."

Shepard shook his head. "Yeah, yeah, now let's get back to the story..."

Author's endnote: *Sigh* What a nice chapter. The seeds of doubt have been sown! The incredibly racist Lieutenant Shepard has begun to lose some of his pride! Will he be able to reconcile himself for past mistakes? I hope so, if you can't reconcile yourself of xenophobia by saving all life in the galaxy 3 times and getting engaged to a Quarian, then I don't think you could ever! But what happened on Azuke itself? What broke in Shepard for him to see things differently? And what's the deal with this Batarian woman I randomly threw into the mix? (And what does she even look like? ;D) Stay tuned for answers in the next chapter and as always, Keelah Se'lai!