They all thought that they understood, but they had no idea. Buffy was on her way to the Bronze, something she wished desperately she was doing for pleasure, arm linked with Spike, her friends chattering around her, only a slight apocalypse threatening. She'd had another hell of a day, getting pummeled by Caleb while she was packing up her desk at the school and she would have really enjoyed a pity party of two, but even her last source of comfort was gone. Giles sent him off with Andrew of all people for a mission she didn't care to understand. She couldn't believe that he agreed to go, without saying goodbye, but Giles stiffly informed her that he had told Spike it would have been what she wanted. Now instead of a fun night out, she was rounding up the troops to tell them, once again, how dire the situation was in which they found themselves.

It pained her, to envision Xander and Anya and Willow and Tara dancing, lost in their own little words, Dawnie giggling away with a group of girls her own age. Faith was the cool one, equipped with all the slayer powers and none of the responsibility. That she'd inspired this trip was not lost on Buffy. She wished she could have been the one to take them out, ensure them that everything would be okay, but there wasn't time for babying. Giles was at least right about the fact that this was war. It seemed hypocritical that he believed Spike had to be taken out for his interference in her life when he allowed the rest of them this excursion, but she was tired of fighting him.

The happy scene she envisioned flew out of her mind as Buffy walked into what appeared to be the end of chaos. Faith was dusting herself off, the girls all talking in loud, excited voices. She'd had enough, sent them home, then let off on Faith. It felt good to punch her at first, but her message still wasn't received. Faith never worried about being the responsible leader, the girls didn't respond to her as someone who deserved respect, and even after everything, her friends still doubted her.

Back at home, she just wanted to go to bed, but she needed to press on. She wanted this done. None of them wanted to go back to the vineyard, griping about injuries and carelessness, and they refused to see that fighting was not perfectly executed plans but persistence. It was Faith who told her to stand down, but Wood and Giles were quick to back her up. Emboldened by the "elders'" responses to Buffy, the girls spoke out, suggesting she had no idea what she was doing. If only, maybe it'd be easier. To pass it off to someone else. To pick and choose the moments she cared.

Looking at them all, eyes sweeping across the room, Buffy kept her head up high.

She said, "If that's how you all feel, good luck to you then. All you, Faith."

She was in the doorway, ready to give in and give up, to hell with all of them, when she heard Tara's voice, no longer hesitant, call out to her. Buffy half-turned, body aching, heart breaking, but there was something different in Tara's eyes.

"I'm coming with you."

"You don't-"

"Me too."

It was Willow, Xander smirking behind her, holding Anya's hand, who looked hesitant, but still present. They all jumped out of the way as Dawn barreled towards her, throwing her arms around her and sobbing an apology. They all crowded out onto the porch, her heart swelling. Looking back into the house, her once sanctuary from the hellmouth, and saw Giles standing in the hallway. He opened his mouth to speak, but his resolved face was on, and Buffy shut the door behind her.

The town was empty save for them and it wasn't hard, finding a place to stay for the night as they regrouped. They broke into pairs, Willow and Tara, Xander and Anya, her and Dawn and slept, though Buffy fitfully, still thinking of what was to come and where Spike had gone.

Hours later, Buffy still couldn't sleep. It was relief, to have her friends beside her, an overwhelming feeling of warmth in an otherwise cold time. Giles was a loss, but lately, he didn't seem to make the best choices when it came to their relationship. Buffy had who she needed, the gang, her sister, and somewhere, Spike. It hit her then, what she needed to do. Kissing her sister on the forehead, she headed back out into the night.

Caleb was waiting for her, but she was renewed. In the end, she had the scythe. She made it home by dawn, hoping somehow Spike would have made it to the new location, but he wasn't there. Willow and Tara were in serious research mode, trying to figure out what the scythe did. Part of her wanted to send Dawn off with Xander, far from the battle, but both of them had proven themselves over the years, and she knew they wouldn't be separated from her.

Plans starting to solidify, Buffy headed out into the night once again, hoping to find Spike back at her house and to reconvene with the others. Only Giles and Andrew were there, telling her where the others were and though she desperately wanted to know where Spike was, she didn't have time. She made it in time to start dusting the Ubervamp and ushering the girls out. Faith was unconscious but alive and it was a struggle, dragging her out while trying to issue a sense of calm to the rest of the girls. This wasn't how she wanted them to learn their lesson.

Back at her house, everyone together, the focus once again was on healing. Buffy waited until they were settled before asking where Spike was. Andrew provided her a brief rundown of their mission and said they had been delayed thanks to a popped tire and Spike's allergy to the sun. They'd made it home after the girls had already gone and Giles had told them Buffy was patrolling separately and so Spike had gone after her.

A deeper worry fluttered low in her belly, and as she went in search of the old woman and the cave, Buffy kept waiting to run into Spike. Once she got this situated, she would find him and bring him home, make sure that he knew it was never her intention to separate them.

Buffy was trying to understand, how the scythe fit into the battle and how they could approach this so-called "coming evil", so many questions popping up in her mind to ask the woman when a loud crunching noise echoed throughout the cave and the woman lay dead at her feet.

Once again, she was battling Caleb, him aiming more for the scythe than for her when he was punched away from her. Buffy's heart fluttered, thinking Spike had found her, when she looked up towards Angel's smiling face. It was strange and so unexpected to see him after all this time. So much had changed. She barely had time to process it when he was knocked away by Caleb.

She wasn't sure if it was the scythe or her own knowledge of her power, but she knew what was going to happen before it did. Slicing through the air, she heard the thunk of metal on flesh and Caleb lay dead at her feet, in two. Angel was laughing. He'd been uttering some kind of commentary while she fought and for a moment, it felt just like old times. Though he'd never laughed or smiled as much as he was now.

Maybe it was the force of nostalgia, or she'd been caught up in the excitement and the finality of Caleb, but when Angel approached and tugged her close, she didn't stop him as he reached down to kiss her.

Spike found her, bloody finally. She had some sort of new weapon in her hand and she was magnificent. He'd been about to intervene himself when he sensed an unwelcome, familiar presence who made himself known before Spike could, so instead he waited. Damn him, he shouldn't have been surprised. That glint in her eyes of her defeat. The way she turned towards Angel and they came together. Lips meeting, stalled against one another, and Spike couldn't handle it anymore.

Maybe this was why she'd sent him away. Spike hadn't believed the Watcher when the man told him the mission was what Buffy had wanted. Had done it anyway because there was no time for dilly-dallying in war and he still had to play his part. Knew something was up, when the Watcher refused to look him in the eye when he asked why Buffy wasn't with the rest of the girls on whatever it was they were doing. He'd been trapped in a random house for an excruciating amount of time thanks to the sun, but when he headed out again, he'd caught a glimpse of her scent and it led him to her.

So the final battle was upon them and Buffy had chosen her vampire.

Spike saw Angel flash some sort of trinket at her, share some thoughts of being her champion before he ran off into the night.

He headed back to the house hours later, only with the intention of offering his services in battle. Endured so much already, might as well see it through the bloody end. Buffy was nowhere to be seen and Giles was looking grim, catching him up on everything that had actually happened. He seemed almost sympathetic to him now, which Spike couldn't stand. The Watcher knew he hadn't gotten the girl and so now he offered some sort of sympathy? Pity more like, and no thank you. With a promise the man would not tell Buffy that he'd stopped by or where he was going, Spike agreed to meet the next night.

All he wanted was to not care, about any of it. Buffy, the Niblet, the people he was becoming to see as his friends, the war. He wasn't sure if it was the soul or his desire to be apart of something, but it wouldn't let him rest. He spent the day stewing, planning out where he'd go after it was all over, but fairly certain this would be his last battle anyway.

Standing out on the porch, he could see them in the living room. Buffy was the center of attention, all eyes rapt on her, which was a pleasant surprise. For once, they were all listening. Things must really be coming together. No Peaches in sight either, but he didn't expect him to be far. Probably making himself at home in Buffy's room.

With a sigh, Spike opened the door. All eyes turned towards him and though he wanted to run back out the door, he stood his ground. Buffy's eyes widened and she looked- relieved maybe- for the second he allowed himself a glimpse of her, and she seemed to take a step forward, but Dawn was faster and she wrapped her arms around him. Enjoying it for only a moment, he patted her back, cleared his throat, and gently pushed her away from him.

So they were going to use the new weapon to embolden all the Potentials in the world with super powers. It was a high task for the witches, and for the rest of them too, who would be going down into the Hellmouth to fend off the Ubervamps. At least he'd go down fighting. With the understanding that this could be their last night, the groups dispersed. Spike watched as the Potentials, nervous and jittery stayed in the crowded living room, as the rest of them broke into pairs. Willow and Tara disappeared, followed by Xander and Anya, and Giles made eye contact with him for a moment, before guiding Dawn out of the room.

Spike didn't want to have this confrontation. He didn't want to face Buffy and her pity, telling him that she cared, but she loved Angel. Even though he knew it, he didn't want it thrown in his face anymore than it already was. His fingers reached into his pocket for a cigarette and he turned towards the door when a firm grip on his arm stopped him. Another sigh and he turned around.

"Spike-"

"'T's alright, Slayer, I-"

"It's absolutely not alright, Spike. Where the hell have you been?"

Pity was one thing, but anger? That was bloody unfair.

"Running your errands, looking for you. Found you, didn't like what I saw, so I went away."

"What you-" Understanding crossed her face and her expression softened. "In the cave."

Spike swallowed and nodded.

"Spike-"

"Save it."

"But-"

"We've got a war to win. No need for explanations. Go be with your sweetie and-"

"But you-"

"Will be there when it counts. Tomorrow, yeah, but-"

"If you'd just let me explain-"

"True love doesn't need explaining."

"True- Spike, I-"

"Got you a do-dad. Can't compete with that," he joked, but inside he felt like he was drowning.

"A what-zit?"

"The necklace."

"Oh, it's, a weapon of some kind. Angel said- I was going to give it to you-"

"Fine," he took it from the hand she extended."

"It's volatile. Angel said it should be worn by a-"

"Don't care what Big, Tall, and Forehead says about it. Will suit me fine."

Spike turned, no longer able to stand it. He didn't miss the desperation in her eyes, but he took it for fear that he was abandoning her fight.

"See you tomorrow, Slayer."

"Spike, wait-"

A scream cut her off and it took Spike only a second to glean it was a simple girly giggle, but Buffy jumped and turned her attention towards them. It gave him enough time to make his escape. It felt a little like bereavement, walking away from her, but he didn't want to see Angel and he definitely didn't need to see the two of them together again.

Buffy had turned away for one minute, confused and desperate and furious with the ignorant vampire, and by the time she turned back, he was gone. She wanted to go after him, but Giles wanted to go over the plan again and Dawn was feeling weepy. With a promise that both she and Spike would survive tomorrow, if only so that she could set his stubbornness right, she let him go.

She regretted that decision the deeper into the night they got. Andrew wouldn't stop asking them questions and Dawn kept trying to bring up old memories. The girls chattered nervously the entire night and Giles kept trying to engage her in conversation, not quite apologizing, but more pretending like everything was okay between them again.

The rest of them were in their pairs, spending what could be their last nights in the way she had wanted to with Spike, but Mr. Stubborn the Bloody had caught her moment with Angel and let his insecurities take hold. Okay, so she didn't exactly blame his misunderstanding, but he never even questioned her, didn't give her a chance to explain that though the kiss had been nice, there hadn't been sparkage. Buffy had admitted she loved Spike and Angel told her about him and Cordelia, and they'd both expressed false outrage and disgust before accepting that their love story was over. She'd sent him home and gone looking for Spike, only to come home and hear from Giles that he wouldn't be back until the next night.

Forced to be responsible, she couldn't spend the entire day and night searching for him, not that it would have made enough of a difference. By the time he made it back in the morning, buses loaded, blanket steaming, she was so decidedly angry with him that she didn't even look at him. He didn't even ask where Angel was, not that she was going to tell him now.

She said 'goodbye' to her friends without the intention of goodbye and headed into the depths of the Hellmouth, despite herself seeking out Spike so that she knew where he was at all times. He was wearing the necklace and fighting with fierce pride, passion, and skill, but also a recklessness she didn't like. It was the type of recklessness that didn't get him out of the cave in the end.

There were so many of them, ceaselessly coming, no matter how many her side slaughtered. The knife sliced into her and Buffy thought it was over. She thought of her friends, of the girls, and of Spike, but then the scythe started to vibrate in her hands and she knew Willow and Tara had done it. Girls around the world were now becoming slayers, the ones closest to her realizing it at that moment.

They were going to win.

Bright light surrounded them and for a moment, Buffy thought it was the spell, but then she looked back to see where Spike was and saw it was emanating from the amulet around his neck. He looked powerful, but resigned.

The cave shivered around them and she heard Faith yell for them to escape.

Ubervamps were dusting from the light and there was no longer a need to fight. As the girls started to run, she hurried towards Spike. He was sweating and the air around him was hot, but Buffy tried to get closer.

"Spike-"

"Go-"

"Not without you. You've done enough, you can still-"

"Wanna see it through to the bloody end."

She clutched his hand and their entwined fingers burst into flames. Tears in her eyes, she matched his gaze, pleading with him. She didn't know what to say until-

"I love you," she willed him to understand.

He smirked. "No you don't, but thanks for saying it."

The cave shook again and it was now or never. Buffy rolled her eyes, tightened her grasp on his hand, and used the other one to slice the amulet off his neck.

She caught his look of awe, but didn't linger on it, as she started to run, guiding them both out of the cave.