READ THIS, VERY IMPORTANT:

HI PPL SO HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO ALL HOPE YOU HAD A GREAT TIME WITH FAMILY OR FRIENDS AND I HOPE SANTA BROUGHT YOU A LOT OF STUFF BUT DON'T FORGET THERE ARE PPL ALL OVER THE WORLD THAT DIDN'T HAVE SUCH A GREAT CHRISTMAS SO THE ONLY THING I ASKED FOR CHRISTMAS WAS THAT YOU ALL COULD DONATE SOME MONEY TO ANY FOUNDATION OR FACILITY THAT HELP THE POOR, THE SICK AND THE INJURED THAT THIS REALLY HARD WINTER SEASON HAS GIVEN US.

AND THANKS EDWARDCULLEN123 FOR EDITING THIS. AND AS SHE CALLS THIS CHAPTER "Brilliant! Absolutely Brilliant." HER WORDS NOT MINE

CHAPTER 13

"Edward I love you." I said. You know, I would never come to regret what I just said; sure I'm shocked that I told him like that but it's too late now. I know it's way too soon but I just know deep in my core that Edward is my soul mate and that we're meant to be so why prolong what is already obvious?

'A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.'

Wise and sensible words from a wise woman like Elizabeth Gilbert; thing is I do want to spend my forever with Edward and I do hope that he will never leave me but… what if he does? Or, what if he doesn't love me back? All these questions have been in my mind for the few days since I realized that I loved him. He has change me so much it surprise me; just a while ago I was smiling a real smile, one that I hadn't smile in a very long time and the pain I feel normally disappears when I'm with him, I'm even starting to laugh whole-heartedly! Just because he makes me laugh.

I was brought out of my thinking when I felt lips attack mine with such a passion I was left speechless and breathless. "I love you too my Bella, so much." Edward said with this huge, happy-sappy smile and I couldn't resist not smiling back. He loves me back! He truly loves me! That night we cuddled in my bed and I fell asleep in no time.

I was in a field or rather a meadow with a beautiful black dress. Far away I could see a beautiful blossomed tree and there was somebody there. When I got to the tree what I saw made me smile, it was Kristine in a beautiful white flowing dress and a beautiful white and violet lily behind her ear.

"Hey little sis." She said to me.

"Kris!" I said surprised. I hadn't dreamed of her in awhile and I missed her.

"So… I heard someone's in love." She sang as she hugged me.

"I'm happy Kris, happier than I've ever been but even though I miss you like crazy, being with Edward made me realize that I can't live my life regretting and with guilt while the people I love are suffering with my suffering. Kris don't ever stop coming to my dreams because they make me happy but they're not the only thing that make me happy right now." I said with tears in my eyes.

"Bella it's time." She said with tears in her eyes as well.

"For what?" I asked confused.

"Sweetie you're letting go of me and by doing that you are ready to move on and live life at the fullest. As much as I miss you are really." She said hugging me.

"Kristine I miss you so much." I said with tears in my eyes.

"Bella I want us to do this last thing together. Do you remember the melody I hummed to you with you were little." She said as I nodded. "Make a song out of it and do it for us." She said while fading away and as I woke up.

Once awake I looked at Edward sleeping soundly and in so much peace it just made me fall harder for him. Even though I wanted to stay in bed with hi and snuggle the melody and lyrics running through my head are more important. I had to do this for me and for Kris, so I got up from my comfort zone and after grabbing my jacket, my cell phone, my 'The Beatles' hand bag with my journal in it and my car keys.

Once I was in my car, I headed to this ballet studio not far from my apartment where they had a beautiful golden vintage baby grand piano. Once I got there did I realize that it was 3:30 a.m. which kind of made me rethink everything.

I know that the owner Ms. Siobhan Cope love hearing my play on the rare occasions that I did and no matter the time, and what makes things even easier is that she lived just above the studio. So in my pajamas I climbed the stairs that led to her place and rang the bell. After a few minutes Siobhan opened the door with her sleeping robe all around her.

"Sweet Bella that are you doing here?" She asked with a worried motherly tone.

"I'm so sorry to disturb you Ms. Cope but may I use your piano?" I asked while blushing embarrassment.

"Oh sweetie of course you can, come with me." She said as she grabbed the keys from the wall and closing the door. Once we were inside the studio she turned some lights on and after grabbing a chair where the moms' of the dancers sat, she opened the top of the piano and told me to play.

As I took out my journal I remembered the day that I bought it, I was walking around like I did sometimes when I wanted to think and I ended up in a beautiful witchcraft store, when I went in I saw this beautiful antique leather cotton book that was really a journal with blank pages, the lady in the store said that she made it so that it created a rough, weathered look and feel, that is was bound in antiqued leather that takes on a wrinkled and faded appearance that gives the impression of an old, aged book; and I fell in love so I bought it.

Taking out a pen, I opened my journal and after passing some pages in which I had already written a thing or two, I finally found a blank page and wrote: The Swan Song. It was the perfect title for this song even though a bit ironic.

"Bella sweetheart if I may ask, what are you going to play this early morning?" Siobhan said.

"The Swan Sing Ms. Cope it's a song I'm writing at the moment." I said sighing.

"The silver Swan, who living had no Note,

When Death approached, unlocked her silent throat.

Leaning her breast against the reedy shore,

Thus sang her first and last, and sang no more:

"Farewell, all joys! O Death, come close mine eyes!

"More Geese than Swans now live, more Fools than Wise."

"Who's that from?" I asked.

"Orlando Gibbons' 'The Silver Swan." She whispered. I tried playing Kris' melody and after a few hours the melody was perfect, now for the lyrics it was going to be a pit hard but I know I could do it but all of a sudden I was brought out of my thinking but Siobhan.

"Did you know that the phrase "swan song" is a reference to an ancient belief that the Mute Swan is completely mute during its lifetime until the moment just before it dies, when it sings one beautiful song?" She said with a faraway look.

"Mute Swans are not actually mute during life though – they hiss – and they do not sing as they die. This folktale has been contested ever since antiquity. Nevertheless, the folktale has remained so appealing that over the centuries it has continued to appear in various artistic works. Aesop's fable of "The Swan Mistaken for a Goose" alludes to it: "The swan, who had been caught by mistake instead of the goose, began to sing as a prelude to its own demise. His voice was recognized and the song saved his life." Or Ovid mentions it in "The Story of Picus and Canens": "There, she poured out her words of grief, tearfully, in faint tones, in harmony with sadness, just as the swan sings once, in dying, its own funeral song." All she said was new to me, but in a weird cosmic way I could feel that there was a connection.

And so I started writing.

Winter has come for me, can't carry on.
The chains to my life are strong but soon they'll be gone.
I'll spread my wings one more time.

Is it a dream?
All the ones I have loved calling out my name.
The sun warms my face.
All the days of my life, I see them passing me by.

In my heart I know I can let go.
In the end I will find some peace inside.
New wings are growing tonight.

Is it a dream?
All the ones I have loved calling out my name.
The sun warms my face.
All the days of my life, I see them passing me by.

As I am soaring I'm one with the wind.
I am longing to see you again, it's been so long.
We will be together again.

Is it a dream?
All the ones I have loved calling out my name.
The sun warms my face.
All the days of my life, I see them passing me by.

After reading it a few times I sang the song to Siobhan and with all my heart and soul I poured all my sadness and loneliness and anger that I've come to save since Kris' death but know I feel free, free as a bird, free as a swan.

SO AS A LATE CHRISTMAS PRESENT I WANT A LEAST 10 TO 20 REVIEWS THATS ALL I'M ASKING YOU CAN EVEN SAY THAT IT SUCKS.

WITH LOVE, RG94