A/N: So yeah, with all the good things from chapter 5, here is chapter 6 with the beginnings of a turbulent storm. I'm sorry, I like writing this kind of stories, bear with me. I like happy endings though.

Songs featured are 'Half of My Heart' by John Mayer and 'Before the Worst' by The Script

I don't own pitch perfect.

It was like the opening line of that book… Beca couldn't remember what and couldn't really be bothered by it. She did know that it was a book they read in school before.

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times…

Beca slumped down her chair at the office, very much tempted to just spin it around and around until she's dizzy and tired and maybe she couldn't think for a while. Her head felt like it was going to explode, filled with so many thoughts.

It's been two months since the beach trip and for a while things were going real well with Chloe, Luke was always there of course to help her out when she needs him to be there, and she was even giving Jesse Swanson, one of her self-proclaimed best friends, the chance of knowing him again.

And it would be all well, if everyone could just stand still for a moment and forget that they've ever met.

But that was so much easier said than done.

It's been a while since the two of us talked
About a week since the day that you walked
Knowing things would never be the same
With your empty heart and mine full of pain

The guy sitting in the cubicle next to Beca had turned up the radio a little louder so that even now she could hear it. She preferred music over silence, of course she does, but right now she was finding it really annoying. The words of songs having a different effect on her than the way it did before and it doesn't at all do anything to lessen her earlier frustrations.

Oh the pain that was the process of your dreams.

It's been freaking two weeks since the night she and Chloe had fought, and she really is trying to figure out how to balance things out and make sense of everything, but it was hard.

Really hard.

It's even harder when it feels like you're in a fight with someone for two whole weeks. Someone you really don't want to be in a fight with.

She was in a standstill, like she was frozen in time, and everything around her was constantly moving.

But it started even a week earlier, if Beca was to be honest.

She was having dinner with Chloe, Luke, Jesse, his current girlfriend whose name is lost on Beca, and Flo who was visiting for the weekend. It started with just the usual polite dinner chatter of 'how are you's' and all, catching up with things that's happened since the last time everyone who was at Luke's for dinner had seen each other.

Then it started.

It was something simple, Jesse talking about a time during their freshmen year. Beca wasn't paying much attention to the story, she's been kind of doing it for a while since she really couldn't relate to empty memories that meant nothing to her. But something about how everyone seemed so connected, and sentimental, and reminiscent about things just got to her. It was like she was an outsider again, this time in her own world. It was an odd feeling, but she didn't like it. Not at all.

It troubled her, how long it's been since the accident and how she's still hasn't gotten back any of her memories, and it added ore to that building frustration. It's like she's seating in a class of her life, watching slide after slide of who she was supposed to be, but she just couldn't relate to any of it.

We were sitting with our backs against the world
Saying things that we thought but never heard
Who would have thought it would end up like this?

Then of course a week after that, things just got worse. Her dad was in town again, and the feelings of the past, feelings that she's supposedly had let go by then, came surfacing out. She gave dinner with them a try, much to both Chloe and Luke's insistence. But instead of understanding anything, she just felt even more alienated than before, things being somewhat unnatural.

And again she felt like she was stuck in that last frame of time, the last few memories she had before going to Barden, and she couldn't move forward from it. She couldn't move forward from the pain and hurt her dad brought back with ancient memories from long ago.

Before the worst
Before we met
Before our hearts decided it's time to love again

"It's like the good things that happened died out in you." Chloe had slipped, sounding exasperated after they got back from that dinner. After Beca had acted cold and unpleasant to her step-mother and father.

"What do you expect me to do Chloe? I can't have the things that happened in the past magically implanted back into my head. Do you honestly think I don't want to move past it? Past my reality now? I want to be there, where you are, where Luke is, but I can't. And I can't just stop acting the way I really feel." Beca had said back, her voice rising.

"I'm not expecting you to be something you're not Beca." Chloe had argued.

"Yes you are, you're waiting for me to be the version of me you've gotten to know again and it's really insufferable sometimes. I want that too Chloe, but I… It's hard Chloe. Because everything just keeps moving past me." Beca had huffed before storming out and into Luke's apartment where her step-brother let her be before essentially giving her the same lecture that Chloe had given but with a more understanding tone.

If only because Luke was one of the few people who knew how Beca could really be difficult. The hopeless case that she was before, the hopeless case that she felt she still was.

All because she met the Bellas, softly and slowly affected her, shifted her perspective, and broke down her walls.

And it felt like they were all rushing this time. A desperate attempt to get back to where they were.

"Beca Mitchell?"

Before today
Before too long
Let's try and take it back before it all went wrong

Beca turned around surprised to hear a voice she never thought she'd hear again. A devilish grin plastered on his face, long black hair still the same way Beca had remembered it back in high school. "Fitz?" she asked confused.

Fitz laughed, the same laugh he used too. Fitroy St. Germaine was a transfer student halfway through Beca's freshman year. He was in Luke's year and so they really only got to know each other for half that year. Fitz was probably the same kind of golden boy that Luke was, he had the looks and the wealth from his family to back him up. He was nice to Beca and they spent a few lunches together bonding over their shared tastes in music. But that was pretty much it. When he graduated, he was gone. No word whatsoever. But apparently he was still the friendly and jovial self he was in high school, personality-wise that is.

"I'm glad you still remember me. What on earth are you doing here?" Fitz said, walking over to Beca looking all dazzling in his suit.

"I should be the one saying all that. I work here. You?"

"Oh, my dad had recently acquired the company." he said with a grin. "Looks like I'll be your boss."

"No way." Beca said.

"Ah, Reggie. I see you've met Fitz. I was planning to introduce the two of you later, he heard one of your mixes things and was really impressed. In my newly minted office, five minutes. 'Kay? Of course okay." Beca's old boss said. He usually worked in the Atlanta branch of the company but looks like things were changing at her workplace and she barely even noticed with all that's happening.

Beca turned to look towards the direction that Fitz walked, following her boss, and saw him mouth 'Reggie?' looking confused.

If only Beca also knew why…

"Well if it isn't Luke! How's it going mate?" Luke heard Fitz say as he saw Beca walking out of the building with him.

Ah, yes, Fitzroy St. Germaine.

Still had that smug look on his face then, Luke thought, he never really knew why, girls fawned over him at school and some boys wanted to be him, but he just really wanted to punch him in the face. Like knock his teeth in.

Maybe it was partly because he befriended, sort of, Beca so easily before, and even know, that it unnerved him.

"How about you don't try sounding British, mate?" Luke replied flatly before turning to Beca who gave him a questioning look. "So what are you doing here Fritz?"

"It's Fitz, Luke. Fitz." he replied with that sickly sweet smile of his. "And I just happened to be Beca's new boss and all."

And somehow that little tidbit of info made Luke's blood boil a little bit more.

He doesn't trust the guy, with all his pretty faced goodness and all. He could sense he was trouble.

Fitz didn't stick with them long enough, thankfully. "Think about it." he had said to Beca as he turned to face her just before a black limousine stopped in front of them. Fitz got in and the vehicle drove off.

And Luke released a breath he didn't know he was holding after.

"What's wrong with you?" Beca asked as they started walking towards the bar they were planning to grab a drink from before Luke's duty at the radio station. He was recently hired as their latest DJ, running a familiar midnight show that reminded him much of the same gig he had given to Beca before.

Luke shrugged. "Nothing much of the matter." he replied and went straight back to the more pressing matters at hand. "How's Chloe?" he asked and Beca groaned and Luke knew that things still weren't set right.

Which was not good.

"Beca, what did you do?" Luke whined just as they turned left at the corner of the block.

"I accused her of trying to make me her version of Beca again, which I know sounds completely ridiculous, maybe to you. And just so you know, I kind of wanted to apologize as soon as I said it, but I couldn't."

"And why not?" Luke asked, sounding just as exasperated as Chloe.

"Well for one thing she just decided the best thing to do was to stay all silent that I don't really know what she's thinking right now."

"Just talk to her, Beca, you can…" Luke had started to say.

"But that's not just it." Beca then said, cutting in, sounding a little peeved. "I feel like my voice is drowning whenever I try to say something that I feel right now. I know you're all focused on 'Beca recovering and feeling better' and all, but that train has long been gone. This is me now. This is who I am. And I couldn't apologize for something a part of me believed was true. I can't keep living trying to chase memories that might never be real for me ever again. And God damn it! I need time to breathe and reconcile things for myself."

Luke stopped on his tracks, studied ever line on Beca's face, the rise and fall of her voice as she tried to control her rising anger, and for the first time Luke felt like she was seeing Beca again for real. He's been so caught upon doing just as what Beca had said, trying to bring back what was, but what if it was all truly gone? Shouldn't they focus on what is?

It was all about getting back the time that was lost, the memories stolen away in a desperate attempt to still give the past four, five years the meaning that it had before.

And Luke had just been too much of a desperate fool to see it.

"Then try to make her understand Beca." Luke then said after taking a deep breath. "She loves you, she'll try to adjust to that."

"Yeah, well, maybe that's the problem." Beca then said before starting to pick up the pace and walk towards their destination.

And Luke could hear it, the words Beca didn't say. The words she had undoubtedly been thinking.

Chloe loves her.

But Beca wasn't sure if she loved her just the same.

And right now, Chloe loved her more than she could possibly love the redhead back.

Luke sighed as he tried to catch up to Beca, trying to push the thoughts away, his own fears. He loves Beca, she was his sister despite not really being related by blood, and he saw it, the most beautiful love story he could ever hope to witness. And now it was breaking his heart to see everything on fragile ground.

"Hey Chloe, Chlo." Beca said as soon as she stepped inside the apartment. Chloe had just finished clearing up her take out order when Beca waltzed right in.

She hated it, she hated being mad at Beca, especially when she can't really blame her for any of it. But was it true? Was she really trying to mold Beca to the way she was before? Of course she wanted her Beca back, but she told herself and believed it true that she would be fine with whatever happened next.

For as long as they had each other, they would be fine.

But all she's found is that she's lost.

And she has no idea which way to go, or for that matter, which way was up or down, left or right.

But then, there was something in the way that Beca said 'Chlo'. It was the first time she ever did since she lost her memories. And it was enough to make her soften her look and acknowledge her presence.

"Look, um… I didn't mean to hurt you with what I said. I just, I think…" Beca struggled to say and Chloe waited with bated breath, not sure if she should prepare for the worst or what. "You know, just, I'm sorry Chloe. I know you're fighting hard to try and understand me and all. I'm trying too, just, I'm not perfect and I might never be again."

"Beca, you were never perfect." Chloe then said. "But I don't want perfect. And you don't need to be back to who you were, you be you. Whoever you are now. I guess, I don't know, I just wish we could find a way back to how things were. For a while there, we were making progress and I guess you opening up to the Bellas and receptive of the trip back to memory lanes we were doing… we might have over done it a bit. I get it. I should be one of the people to realize that at least with your dad, we might have to go through things at a slower pace." Chloe replied and when Beca nodded and breathed a sigh of relief, Chloe could feel her nerves relax a little.

"Beca, you can always talk to me. You always used to. And I won't ever get tired of listening to you. Tell me if I'm doing something wrong or something." Chloe then said and Beca looked at her with mixed emotions.

And Chloe was left to wonder what thoughts were going through Beca's mind as she silently wished her a goodnight and went to bed.

She was perfect.

That was the problem sometimes.

Beca's head was in her hands again, staring at her computer at work. It's been three days since she's talked to Chloe and while things felt like they were settling down and falling into place, Beca knew they were not.

The surface looked calm and steady.

But they were drowning on the inside, she knew for sure.

In some strange way, she knows she felt it before. This frustration of when thing just won't come together, when she wasn't too sure about where the future would lead here. The anxiety would take over and the panic sinks in and it was a constant struggle of letting calmness win out at the end. It was familiar.

And it was so maddening that she couldn't figure out why.

Sure they talked a little. And sure their back to their usual stillness.

But their stillness wasn't living at all.

It was like Beca woke up to a place frozen in time, where she was cast in a role she was unfamiliar with, where the past was simply given in exposition, and where the future was never going to come. All that mattered was the present. But Beca knew that life was more than just the present. It was the future she always looked forward to, and it was the one thing she couldn't have a good clear view of in her head.

"Have you thought about it yet?" Fitz asked when they bumped into the elevator earlier.

"No, not really." Beca replied, although she was lying. She did give it a thought, she just couldn't come up with a decision.

"The offer stands Beca, even after you make up your mind. Just in case you say no and you want to change your answer."

"In otherwords, until I say yes?" Beca asked amused.

"Well, it is true that I don't take no for an answer." Fitz said and the door of the elevators opened, unveiling Beca's floor in front of them. "You have talent Beca, I'm offering you a cheat code so you don't have to go through all the measly steps to the top." he managed to finish saying as the doors of the elevator closed on him.

Beca took a deep breath as she slumped into her desk, the lack of inspiration killing her, the lack of clarity killing her creativity. She has no idea what to do.

"Hey." Chloe heard Beca say, bumping into each other as they arrived at their apartment at the same time.

"Hey." Chloe replied a little surprised. "I thought you were going out with Luke again tonight?"

"Yeah, I totally bailed." Beca replied as they went inside, she looked a little nervous and uncertain.

"What is it?" she finally asked and the shaky breath that Beca drew told her that it was probably about something Chloe might not end up liking. "Do we need to talk?"

"You've read my mind." Beca said as he exhaled. "Um, yeah, so, our company, totally got bought by this new guy."

Chloe nodded, urging Beca to go on. She wasn't really sure where this was going and why Beca would be so nervous. Unless she was fired? But who in their right minds would let Beca go? "They didn't, I mean, you didn't get fired, did you?"

"What? No, no." Beca instantly replied, standing awkwardly by the door. "It's just… the guy, well technically his dad bought the company, but my new boss, he's this old high school friend of mine. We didn't hang out a lot or anything, but he was one of the few people I talked to."

"Beca, where is this going?" Chloe asked sounding a little lost with what Beca was saying.

"Oh, um, right. He offered me a job. Well more of a promotion of sorts. Anyways, music producer. He wants me to be a music producer, executive music producer, for our record label."

"Beca, why on earth are you all nervous about it then?" Chloe said with a huge smile on her face coupled with a nervous laugh. "That's a big deal isn't it? Why aren't you a little bit happier? Wait, we should be celebrating now, you should be celebrating with Luke, why… please tell me you said yes?"

"I'm still thinking about it."

"Beca, what on earth is there to still think about?" Chloe asked. "This is huge for you." she said as she made her way to cross the room, uncertain If she should just place her hands on Beca's or hug her right then. Truth be told she wanted to kiss her, and kiss her so bad. She's been wanting to kiss her since she woke up, she's been wanting to just hold her in arms like she used too, and right at that moment the temptation has never been stronger.

"Chloe, it's in New York." Beca replied, her words cutting through Chloe's thoughts. "Fitz wants me to work with our NY-based artists."

"Oh." Chloe replied thoughtfully. The job was in New York.

Which shouldn't be bad, right? Aubrey and Stacie were in New York. They would be closer to their friends.

But then that would mean they would have to move again.

She would have to look for a new job, look for apartments, and manage finances for said move…

…so much needed to be done. Their lives were going to be uprooted again. Just like the move from Atlanta to LA, Beca's so-called promise land, the place where she thought she would fulfill her dreams and turn them into reality.

But there was something in the way Beca was acting. Memory or not, Chloe knew her down to a tee. The words that were unspoken where weighing her down and it was that understanding of Beca that was stirring fear inside of her.

She was saying all of these for a reason. Beca was looking for something. A reason to stay in LA, maybe? Chloe's full support to move to New York?

"We can handle it." Chloe started to say. "There are a lot of good schools in New York, and I could hopefully find one that would hire me. Bree and Stacie are there too. Beca, it's your dream and you know I'll be here for you every step of the way."

Beca groaned. "I know Chloe. And that's the problem." she said in all her frustrations. "I feel like I'm bulldozing right through you. That's the problem. You've been just perfect, and accommodating and what have I done? It's always you sacrificing things for me, and I don't even deserve it."

And it was there in between the lines.

I feel like I'm abusing your kindness and affection too much.

"Beca, don't say that. Of course you do. Beca, I-I love you." Chloe dared say, pausing for a moment to see how it might have affected Beca. But Beca had the same look of frustration and concern in her eyes. A look that Chloe just couldn't understand. "I'm proud of you. You're incredibly talented and this is your shot, your chance. I'm not going to stand in the way of that."

"Chloe…" Beca reasoned but Chloe insisted on talking.

The words unsaid were already haunting her.

I know but you're doing real well here already and I don't want to ruin that.

"Beca, I know you can't remember but you've done a lot for me too. After earning a master's degree I wasn't sure what to do and well, I don't know. I had a fear of what comes next but you, you helped me figure things out. You helped build my confidence up and all, and I…"

"Chloe…" Beca tried again. "I'm not going to just throw you in a loop and uproot your life just cause… you've already sacrificed enough." she said.

And Chloe could already imagine what she didn't say.

I don't deserve the sacrifice Chloe.

"Beca, I can compromise, give way and adjust…" Chloe went on, desperation in her voice. They had two options, at least to Chloe they were only two. It's either they both leave or they both stay and she was understanding the struggle that Beca was going through.

Because there was a third option that Chloe wanted to ignore.

"I know!" Beca yelled, throwing Chloe off. "That's the problem!"

"How is that the problem?" Chloe asked, exhausted and confused, her voice was rising and she could notice Beca starting to shake a little herself. "Beca, relationships are about compromise. And right now you need me to…"

"But Chloe, we're not even sure what we are!" Beca replied, things bottled up finally being set free. The words unsaid finally being spoken.

And Chloe was not prepared for it, even though the words Beca said were all true. She knew, she wasn't even sure herself. Their relationship wasn't complicated, just undefined.

In a way she never thought she'd imagine to be possible.

"Beca…" Chloe said in a breathy whisper, a shaky voice, she was trying not to cry. The stress, the months of pent-up emotions running through her were slowly taking over. "Beca, I love you and I…"

"That's the problem Chloe." Beca whispered, desperation in her tone, begging Chloe to understand. "I don't even remember that I love you too." she then said, tears streaming down her cheeks before she did what she always did when she was upset.

Run and seek isolation in her room, shutting the door right behind her as loud as she could, leaving Chloe to fall down on her knees right where she stood, not able to find the strength to keep standing at all. A kind of pain that she never though was possible was settling in, and it was already killing her, the words that were still left unsaid even then.

Beca collapsed on the floor, her head in her hands, the tears continuously rolling down her cheeks as she sobbed, her back leaning on her door.

She doesn't even understand what was going on. Where they having another fight? They weren't supposed to have a fight. She wanted to talk to Chloe, because she wanted to tell her about New York. She wanted to weigh her options, true, but she didn't want to upset Chloe's life in LA, she's already done so much for her with her current state and all.

Beca crawled towards her desk, grabbed her headphones and placed them over her ears. She wanted to seek comfort in music.

I was born in the arms of imaginary friends
Free to roam, made a home out of everywhere I've been
Then you come crashing in, like the realest thing
Trying my best to understand all that your love can bring

She told Chloe because she cared. And she knew if Chloe finds out about the offer and she didn't tell her, then she would be upset and all giving.

But Chloe's given up a lot for her already. And she didn't want her to give up more. Beca knew, she could see how passionate Chloe was with her job at the school, and at one of the top private schools in LA too. She talked with great affection for her students, seeing their potentials and trying to help them reach their dreams. If how she was with Beca is any indication of how she was as a teacher – patient and kind in every way – then she knew for sure that Chloe would be missed.

She's already given up so much for her. And yes, Beca felt it, Chloe's ability to love her so much and so selflessly.

It made her feel even worse.

Because she wasn't sure if she could ever return that love.

And she was planning to turn down Fitz's offer. LA was her dream for so long. And LA was her home now. If anything, LA should be the one place that could help her jog her memory, maybe Atlanta too but LA is where she lived for the past year.

Moving to New York would be so scary and new.

It would be the unknown.

And despite all the frustration she was feeling, of the maddening experience that was driving her insane regarding her partial memory loss, it was her home. And even if Beca didn't want to admit it, it was Chloe that made her feel like this place was home.

I was made to believe I'd never love somebody else
I made a plan, stay the man who can only love himself
Lonely was the song I sang, 'till the day you came
Showing me another way and all that my love can bring

Yes she wants to remember. Desperately.

No, they weren't supposed to fight.

Yes, she wanted to talk to Chloe about it.

But no, Chloe's response – albeit it was kind of obvious – wasn't what Beca was looking for.

She had wanted to talk about it. Not just be ready to give the normalcy of her life here for a new one.

She wanted to talk through the details.

She didn't want Chloe to just give and give.

Because Chloe deserved better than that.

And Beca cares, she cares for Chloe a lot even though she's got no clue why or when she started to care about her. She doesn't want to ever hurt her, but she also wants her to live, have a life, grow the same way that Chloe wanted her to do so. She wanted Chloe to find success and be happy. Not just endlessly sacrifice for Beca.

Maybe that was what made things so difficult.

Because Beca doesn't want to go to New York without Chloe.

But Beca knew that moving to New York wasn't what's best for Chloe.

Oh half of my heart's got a grip on the situation
Half of my heart takes time
Half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
That I can't keep loving you (can't keep loving you)
Oh, with half of my heart

And she knew, some of the things she said came out wrong. But it was the truth. Chloe was sacrificing so much for someone who couldn't even love her back the same way, or so Beca thought. She was giving up so much already. Chloe was ready to follow her anywhere and everywhere, and that was great in a way, making Beca feel loved and important.

But she doesn't want Chloe to forget to love herself too, to do what she needs to do for herself.

She can't keep letting Chloe down. And while she sees how hopeful Chloe was, she knew that she'd end up killing the hope somehow if their relationship, whatever it was at the moment was just a one way street.

Something's gotta give, and Chloe's already given so much.

So it was Beca's turn now.

Your faith is strong
But I can only fall short for so long
Down the road, later on
You will hate that I never gave more to you than half of my heart
But I can't stop loving you
(I can't stop loving you)
I can't stop loving you
(I can't stop loving you)
I can't stop loving you with half of my

Somehow some semblance of clarity started seeping in through her very muddled thoughts. It wasn't LA versus NY, it never was. It was what they represented. It was how their life was now, in all of its mess.

Beca knew what they needed, and she knew that the easy way to get it was never an option from the start.

They can't keep living in a frozen state forever, pretend that it is all okay, especially when it was not.

She was feeling so torn up about this for three days, since Fitz made the offer, because it was more than just her dreams on the line, more than what everything she's ever wanted.

And what made it more difficult was she couldn't harmonize what she felt and what was going through her head. She couldn't understand and recognize her conflicting emotions, her desires to reach the top and realize her dream with what made her feel so reluctant in the first place.

Because Chloe was the unexpected thing she cared about in a way she never thought was possible.

Maybe it was love after all? Beca wasn't really sure. Because in her head she's never been in love.

Half of my heart
Oh, half of my heart
Half of my heart's got a real good imagination
Half of my heart's got you
Half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
That half of my heart won't do…

Beca grabbed her headphones and let them hang down her neck as she desperately tried to wipe away the tears that won't stop falling.

She's come to a decision.

PS: Updating with 7 Friday latest! So yay for that…. However… I do apologize in advance for chapter 7… (aka, I would probably buy a few boxes of kleenex before reading it).

PPS: No, FitzXBeca will never be a thing, he will get what's coming to him and you'll know why. He's just plot devise, so put your pitchforks down folks.