Chapter 40 – Your Soulless Bastard
~~~~New Years Eve 1895~~~~
Helen twiddled her fingers together. She stared out the window of her carriage at the bright night lights of New York City. It had almost been 6 months since she had last been in the magnificent city, and with good reason she thought. He was everywhere in this town. In everyday street gossip, in the paper, in everybody's thoughts, especially hers.
She remembered the last time she saw him, quite painfully. She had reached midway across the ocean before realization had hit her, she had pushed him away quite violently, all because he was trying to be closer to her. She had spewed some crap to trick herself into running away, that it was justified to treat him that way. She had broken down in sobs, knowing she had ruined the best friendship she had ever had.
Now she was back. She didn't want to be here. She felt it in her bones, he was here, it was like she could sense how much he hated her for what she had done, what she always done…she even mentioned John. Oh, god John…like he wasn't already a problem she had to deal with. Coming back, promising he was cured, like a desperate alcoholic promising never to drink again…while still holding a bottle in his fist.
At least Nikola tried to change for her.
"What are you thinking about, darling?" asked James, who was sitting beside her. "You've been deftly quiet this entire trip."
Ah, James. What was it like for him? To have watched the five dissolve one by one because of her, being able to nothing but stand back and hope it never happened to him. He and Nigel managed to stay apart from the chaos. She was grateful for that.
Helen felt poisonous. The two men she had held the dearest, both ruined by her love. John was a hopeless wreck with a knife, and Nikola…Nikola was…well, she didn't know, she didn't want to know.
"I'm just thinking," she sighed dismissively at her friend, patting his hand assuredly.
"You're thinking about him, aren't you?" he asked. Damn inquisitive bugger.
"I rather not talk about it James," she sighed, her eyes trailing back to the window.
"Well, I hate to say I told you so, but…"
Helen rolled her eyes at him.
"I get it, thank you James, please skip the lecture," she huffed.
"Helen, we are going to an old friend's New Years party, can we try to enjoy the evening, please smile, once, for me?" his soft fingers pinched her cheeks lightly and she slapped them away.
"Do you promise not to bring up any of my past discretions?" she glowered at him.
"Fine," he raised his hands in surrender.
She nodded her head and looked back at the window.
"God, what if he's there?" she muttered.
"He won't be," sighed James.
"We're not talking about," she said warningly.
"Nope," he raised his hands again defensively.
"I don't want to go to this party, why are we going?" she whined.
"Because you haven't done anything this trip but go from the hotel to the site and back, you need to get out, socialize, have a normal conversation, you know, something other than burn handkerchiefs and stare out windows," James made a strange expression and it caused a light giggle to escape her stoic resolve. "My word, could that have been…a hint of amusement? A smile? It is!"
Helen tried to glare at him but was thrown into even more giggles.
"The somber Helen Magnus can laugh again, it's a New Years miracle!" he exclaimed teasingly.
"You are a horse's arse," she managed to say through her giggles.
"But it's made you laugh, I don't think you've laughed for the last six months," James smiled softly. "I missed it."
Helen smiled weakly back at him.
"Perhaps you're right, a little light company and new scenery will probably be just what I need," she grasped his fingers again. "Thank you."
The carriage began to slow and James leaned over her to peer out the window.
"We're here," he grinned and maneuvered around her to open the door. "Ladies first."
Helen let out a scoff before picking up her skirts and shuffling out into the brisk cold air of a New York winter.
She shivered as she waited for James to get out and instruct the driver, handing him a few bank notes and mumbling to him about fees.
Helen looked at the clearly lively home, she could hear the music and clinking of glasses and laughter. It was definitely a party going on inside.
James grasped her arm gently.
"Shall we go in?" he asked, looping her arm with his.
"I guess so," she said, uncharacteristically shyly.
He smiled reassuringly, patting her hand and leading her inside.
Immediately once the passed the threshold, James was pulled away in greeting to the party's host. A flurry of kisses and hugs and handshakes, leaving Helen to awkwardly hand her coat to the coat check and receive a button with a number on it.
She didn't recognize a soul in the room, she was actually surprised James knew some of them, this was a much looser party than the type they were used to. It was a melting pot of class. There was the few upper class couples, either sitting and chatting with others, or standing and smoking cigars, and some less upper class, laughing and singing, and chugging drink after drink with their fellows. Then there were the particularly loose individuals either fornicating in the shadows of the stairwell or broom closet, or publicly dancing with half their clothes unbuttoned.
Helen found a small spot, and a glass of champagne, resigning herself to her little corner of the room, hoping not to be noticed by the young men who could only swagger on two drunken feet across the room to speak to her. There was some other ladies near her, chatting away incessantly, and the noise was pounding in her brain. The smell of alcohol, cigar-smoke and cheap perfume was giving her a headache. She brought a hand to her temple and rubbed it lightly.
James finally found her again, gently nudging her.
"Helen, come I want to introduce you to a friend of mine," he said with a soft smile.
She accepted his hand gratefully.
It took her a moment before she realized they were dancing.
"James, what are you-?" she asked incredulously. Looking around them to see his hands holding her waist gently, a good distance away.
"You looked miserable, Helen, I thought this might cheer you up a bit," he smiled sweetly through his beard.
"I'm fine, really James, I just don't feel comfortable amongst all these strangers is all," she shrugged.
"Look it's almost midnight, if at that time you're still not having a good time we'll go back to the hotel," he compromised.
"Alright," she smiled weakly.
They continued dancing; he twirled her gently every so often, but kept her at a safe distance…well compared to the other, drunken couples on the dance floor.
This was a friendly dance…not what…whatever they were doing.
Helen eyed a couple in her peripheral vision. The woman's ass was practically grinding against the front of her dates pants, swaying to the beat of the music. Helen's Victorian sensibilities read that as highly inappropriate, but she seemed to be the only one who noticed.
James smirked, knowing what she was looking at.
"Some people, right?" he whispered to her.
"What?" she turned her head sharply towards him.
He gestured to the couple she had been eyeing.
"Some people have no discretion," he clarified.
"I'm sorry, I am just shocked at the display," she shook her head. "That was rude of me."
"No, I agree, shameful," he shrugged.
"I said I was sorry," she glared at him.
He laughed.
"Helen, I am not insinuating anything, just making light conversation," he smiled earnestly.
Helen bit her lip again and looked down slightly.
The silence was slightly awkward till James cleared his throat.
"Helen, we don't have to dance if you don't want to, I just thought-"
"It's not that James, this is nice, really, its just…"
"I know…we're not talking about it, remember?"
She laughed slightly.
"Right."
"I just want you to have fun tonight. Good fun, not that kind of fun," he gestured jokingly back to the couple.
Helen laughed.
"It really is shameful…at least Nikola and I had the discretion to keep it behind closed doors," she said not realizing the reference.
"I know that woman's husband too," James mumbled.
"You mean she's not-?
"Nope, he's the one smoldering hotter than his cigar over there," James gestured subtly with his head.
Helen glanced briefly to see a portly red-faced man clenching a brandy glass behind some other fellows.
"Oh my," Helen tried not to laugh. "Does she know he's-?"
"Most definitely, he's a business man," James said as if that answered everything.
"What?" Helen laughed.
"She's a housewife married to a man whose mistress is money," James clarified.
"Ah," Helen smirked. "So she's-?"
"Oh yah," James grinned.
This caused Helen to let out a harmonious laugh.
"GLINDA!" a loud shout broke through the crowd.
"Happy New Year," James whispered to Helen sarcastically. Helen covered her mouth to stifle her laughter.
"YOU TWO BIT JERSEY HUSSIE!" cried the husband of the woman.
He came up and shoved her dance partner away.
"HAVE YOU NO SHAME, WOMAN!"
Helen buried her face in James' shoulder to hide her face, she was nearly in tears from laughter.
"Don't act all high and mighty on me George, it's not like you haven't been socking your secretary every night for the past month!" cried the woman.
"At least I don't do it in public like a prostitute!" he shouted back.
It was James's turn to try not to laugh.
"We were dancing!"
"Do you even know his name? Or did you just choose the first one you could sink your claws into!"
"In fact, I've done five people at this party already, you just haven't noticed!"
"YOU BITCH!"
"YOU BASTARD!"
"You aren't getting any money out of me, Glinda! You'll be out so fast you're hair will turn white!"
"I hope you drown in your brandy, George!"
"Well, ladies first!"
"Frank, get my coat will you, I'm not going home with him!"
"Hah! You aren't going home at all, you're just going to go to the brothel and work for tips!"
"Oh, will I see you there?"
The couple marched out and Helen couldn't contain her laughter any more, but managed to muffle it slightly into James' suit jacket.
"Oh my god," she choked out.
"I'll say…his secretary's a man," James muttered causing another laugh from her.
"I'm sorry for that folks, but please, keep the party going," said the rather flustered host. "We have one minute till midnight folks, lets get this party back on its feet."
Just like that the room returned to its previous buzz, he music from the gramophone starting again with an even more upbeat tune. Helen and James returned to their dancing, except a tad bit closer than they had been before.
"I told you it'd be fun," whispered James.
"I love seeing a couples marriage have a complete meltdown, I think it should happen at every party," Helen joked.
"I'll make sure to invite those two next time," laughed James.
"Oh, bloody hell, I hope not," Helen laughed.
"10 seconds to midnight!" yelled someone.
"10!" shouted the entire party in unison.
Helen and James held on to each other with a laugh as they joined in the tradition.
"9!"
Helen saw some movement out of the corner of her eye.
"8!"
She turned her head and saw that a door from across the room had been opened. For some reason a feeling of dread washed over her.
"7!"
A woman stepped out of the doorway in a tipsy laugh, nearly tripping over her feet, her hand entangled in another's.
"6!"
James saw Helen's demeanor shift dramatically and he watched her eyes widen slightly.
"5!"
A foot stepped out, black shoe, long black pant leg.
"4!"
Helen's breath hitched and the dread spread throughout her.
"3!"
James' gaze shifted to where hers was.
"Helen?" he asked.
"2!"
A long torso attached to the arm that hold the woman's arm followed the legs, just as well dressed as he'd always been.
"1! Happy New Year!"
She saw him, the one man she didn't want to see.
The whole room rained with confetti, blurring her vision slightly, but she could see him through all the cheering and colored paper.
He pulled his date to him in a sloppy kiss, she pressed even closer to him, her light brown hair tousled, his bow tie undone and hanging around his neck.
Helen felt herself become green then felt herself lose color altogether.
"James…let's go," she grabbed his lapel tightly, tugging him away before he saw them.
James nodded and followed her without any protestation.
But it was too late, the crowd had them sandwiched away from the door and he lifted his lips from his date's mouth and met her eyes from across the room.
She expected him to flush and exit quickly, anything but grin and straighten up and whisper something to his date and swagger up to them.
"Helen!" he said with a wide grin. "And James! I'm not surprised! She's making her way through all of us, aren't you?"
Helen felt an anger bubble up at him.
"Nikola," she said through clenched teeth.
"What are the chances we'd be at the same party on New Years, it must be divine intervention!" Nikola chuckled, hitting James' shoulder playfully. James remained placid and unamused.
"Yes, what are the chances? We were just leaving," James interjected.
"What so soon? The party just started," Nikola smirked and grabbed a champagne glass off the waiter.
"We have an early morning," James lied easily.
"I see," Nikola grinned. "Sounds like a late night to me."
He drained the glass in one gulp.
"Your one to talk," muttered Helen.
"Aw, Helen, I'm just enjoying the festivities," he shrugged.
"Ah, Nikki! There you are!" said the woman he'd been with. "She handed him another glass and kissed him.
"Thank you darling," he smiled at her.
Helen now recognized her as none other than Katharine Johnson.
"Helen!" Katharine smiled shyly over at her. "Nice to see you again."
James did a double-take at Katharine and Helen, not sure of the interaction.
"Is this your husband?" Katharine offered her hand to James. James almost thought twice about accepting it, not knowing where it had been earlier.
"No, he's just a colleague and an old friend," said Helen.
"Charmed I'm sure," he took her hand and shook it.
"Where is Robert?" asked Helen.
Katharine's cheeks blushed slightly.
"Oh he's out of town…" Katharine said rather sheepishly.
Helen fixed a pointed gaze on to Nikola.
"Yes, Katharine here was all alone on New Years so I thought I'd take her out for the evening, you know, keep her company," Nikola smirked mischievously.
"I'm sure," Helen said sharply.
He once again drained his champagne glass, placing it on the tray of a waiter passing by.
Katharine giggled slightly.
"That must be his fifth one tonight, I don't know where he puts it," she placed a hand on his chest slightly.
Helen felt her anger bubble even further.
"Nikola can I talk to you for a moment…in private?" she said deftly calmly to him, her words biting.
"Fine," he smiled casually. "James, I'm sure you can entertain the lady in my absence."
James forced a smile at him and turned back to Katharine as Helen all but physically dragged Nikola out of the ballroom by his lapel.
She pushed past the multiple of celebrating and kissing people, through the narrow hallway, into the bathroom, tossing him inside.
He chuckled with amusement at her anger as he fell against the counter.
"What the bloody hell do you think you're doing?" she admonished at him, shutting the door behind them. "A married woman, Nikola! The wife of a friend! For god's sake, Nikola! What if Robert were to have found out? Is that what you want, Nikola? To ruin every friendship you ever had for a couple of kicks?"
Nikola laughed and turned to the mirror, dunking a cloth into the basin and wiping his hands with it.
"Oh, Helen, green is not a good color on you," Nikola snickered, receiving a particularly harsh shove from the blonde.
"What is that supposed to mean?" she cried.
He shrugged simply which earned him a hard slap across the cheek. His leg buckled but he managed to catch himself on the counter. He laughed again and hoisted himself easily to his feet again.
"You are acting like a drunkard, a reckless and pathetic drunkard," she shoved him again.
"Were you expecting anything different?" he shrugged again.
"What are you talking about?" she glared at him.
"Well, apparently I'm just a soulless bastard who uses everyone for his own gain, if I'm not mistaken I'm just living up to my job description," his tone switched to being icy in a quick flash and Helen froze momentarily, the comment throwing her off guard.
Helen opened her mouth to respond but found no words to say.
Nikola laughed again, a particularly cruel and heartbreaking laughter.
"Now she has no words, no cutting response, do I detect shame?" Nikola taunted. "A sense of guilt perhaps?"
"It wasn't…it's not like that!" she finally caught up to him.
"I remember it being exactly that Helen…I had asked you for something deeper and you shoved it in my face! Accusing me of debaucherous scheming, called me sick! A soulless bastard! I recall every word. This time I just decided to live up to expectation. Katharine wouldn't have been my first choice as I do love Robert dearly, but she was willing, she had been practically throwing herself at me the last few times I'd visited them, and at first I let my moral standard get in the way, but you opened my eyes! I already have no soul apparently, let's just add heartless and unloyal to the list. I won't have to die and face my sins! I like forever in this skin as a monster, so screw it!"
Helen shoved him again.
"Do you not think that I hate myself every moment that I think of that evening? There are no words to make up for how I treated you, I overreacted, I spewed words that weren't meant for you, anger not meant for you! I'm sorry! I'm only human!"
"And I'm not!" he shouted, the loudness nearly making her jump. The two froze in a tense second, looking deep into each other's eyes, searching for something.
Without warning they collided, lips, hands, and bodies. The kiss was hungry and suffocating, sucking the air out of the room and leaving them panting, but desperate and even more unsatisfied.
In a split second, Nikola had knocked the basin and other items off the counter and plopped Helen on to it, her back pressing against the cool mirror with Nikola standing in between her legs, ravishing her throat as if it was an oasis in a desert. Her hands gripped his slick hair, violently tugging on it to pull his head off her clavicle so she could rope him into another searing kiss. His pants were wet from the spilt water from the basin and she could feel the wet fabric rubbing against her thighs, driving her even further to him, grinding her hips against his.
He took no time in removing the clasps on her stockings and shoving what he could of her skirts up past her hips.
In the back of his mind he could hear the entire party join in a round of Auld Lang Syne, effectively muting the couple in the bathroom. Cheers and clinking of glasses, another bottle of champagne was opened with a loud pop! No one in the room heard any of the cries, no one, not even James heard a name shouted loudly amongst the din of the party. They didn't even blink when the sound of glass shattering filled up the room of the bathroom at the end of the narrow hallway.
Nikola panted against Helen's heaving bosom. Her ragged breaths rang in his ears almost as loudly as the celebrations beyond the door. It had been quick and dirty, and violent. His eyes moved towards his clawed hand still embedded amongst the glass and wood of the mirror. With a grunt he wrenched it out, causing more glass to dislodge and land with a tiny tinkle on to the counter. His hand healed almost instantly, only leaving minor traces of his blood on his hand, he'd wipe that off later. He stayed pressed against, listening to her heartbeat.
"I don't," she gasped, fighting through her breathlessness. "I don't want to see you again."
He sucked in air and nodded slightly.
"I know," he gasped, his bloody hand coming to rest on the edge of the counter to keep himself upright.
"You're a…a soulless bastard," she growled, still out of breath.
"Yes, but…I'm your...soulless bastard," he chuckled weakly, not having enough energy to vocalize it completely.
"Now, get your bloody hands off me," she growled.
Without protest Nikola pushed himself up to full height, tucking his modesty back in his trousers and stealing the handkerchief neatly tucked in between her breasts to wipe his hands with. Helen scowled at him but he just grinned back.
"A token of your affections," he mocked her, tucking the handkerchief into his breast pocket.
"I hate you," she smoldered, slapping him again.
"I think I'll live," he laughed, leaning against the wall, watching as she rolled her stockings back up and quickly tried to fix her appearance, grateful she had left her hair curled and down this evening.
"Don't tell James," she warned.
"Helen, I never fuck and tell," he grinned widely.
She hopped off the counter, readjusting her skirts then shoving him out of her way, finally annoyed to the brim with him.
She couldn't believe she had felt sorry for him, she was going to find James and then head back to the hotel and forget this night, that any night with him had ever happened.
Before she could leave entirely he grasped her shoulder, spinning her around and kissing her soundly.
"Happy New Years, Helen," he grinned after pulling back. She took no hesitation in kneeing him in the crotch, not even waiting around to see him collapse against the bathroom wall.
Nikola's strained laughter fell through his clenched teeth, the pain would subside eventually. He looked back at the broken mirror and his smirk grew.
He was a bastard, but damn if it didn't have some perks…
He straightened up and slicked back his hair, fixed his suit then emerged back into the party.
Helen marched straight up to James, grasping his arm.
"James, let's go," she demanded more than asked.
"Of course, darling, it was nice meeting you Miss, uh?" James looked at Katharine.
"Fillipov," she answered for him and smiled sweetly.
Helen felt sick to her stomach.
"James, now!" she ordered.
"What's the rush Helen?" Nikola strode back to Katharine's side, kissing her cheek gently.
"Where'd you two run off to?" asked James.
"We just had some things we needed to…beat out of each other…we worked it out," Nikola gave a small half smirk, earning him another glare from Helen.
"I've had my fill of partying and social interaction, we have business to attend to in the morning, so, James," Helen hinted to none-too-subtly.
"I hope you get lots of rest, Helen…you too, James, drive safely," Nikola took Katharine's hand, kissed. "Dance my darling?"
She giggled softly.
"I would be delighted," she smiled and Nikola led her away in to the crowd of people with a leer and a devious grin.
Helen watched their every move with a burning scowl.
James yanked his arm out of Helen's tight grasp and turned to her.
"Are you going to tell me what all that was about?" he chided her with a brotherly glare.
Helen turned to look at her old friend, feeling her skin go flush.
"We're not talking about it."
With that, she spun on her heel and stormed out.
~~~~Author's Notes~~~~
Wow, a bit M-ish don't you think? Sorry about that, I tried to keep it as clean as possible but with these two, yeesh!
Anyways, don't cry my little tesla troopers, Nikola will see the error of his ways before anything seriously bad happens...and Helen won't hate him forever, and least now you know she isn't completely stupid...and Nikola...well it was his turn to be a douche, I'm sorry for that. This was like an awkward ex-battle...you kind of feel sorry for James and Katharine huh? Don't worry, James will get over it..it's Katharine whose heading for a little heartbreak (oop spoilers!) Not really because you can sort of deduct that from...well, history and other things.
Now the Next bit, i'm thinking we'll take a bit of a time jump...Tesla and Helen need some time to cool off...sorry for the tiny bit of language btw...if it offends...I promise I won't do too much more of it...I only use them because I think that is the only thing he would say at that moment...Nikola is being a little pissy at this time...I bring back some of his earlier sweetness...he'll get a wake up call and snap out of this dark demon. SO the time jump...if i think it over properly will probably land us somewhere around the Worth Affair...I haven't decided if Worth will actually make an appearance or it'll just be alluded to...I'll think about it. But guess what...John gets to come back and be the bad guy again! Yay!
As for Helen and Nikola...you'll see :P I'm not saying a thing!
Read and Review...and hey, send me a little hello...I like them :) I wonder if I should do another little contest on the next chapter...like guess who is Helen going to slap next...hmmm...maybe...for now, just tell me that I'm not ruining your favorite tv couple :) I'm kidding...Teslen shall live forever!