AN: For MDemagogue

Disclaimer: I am 100% certain that I do not own Glee. More's the pity.

Warnings: Mike being a total sap. Kurt being a tease. Matt being Mike's heterosexual life partner. Fluffy Preslash.

I Know, Baby Just How You Feel (Mattress)

Mike reflected on the unfairness of his life as they recorded the Mattress Land commercial. He was in a room with Kurt Hummel in pajamas AND a bed, but there were no sexytimes happening.

Kurt was spending the time between takes bitching about the cheap fabric the pajamas were made of to anyone who'd listen (read, Mercedes and Tina) and Mike really just wanted to drag him off somewhere and strip them off him so he'd shut up and use his mouth for something useful, like sucking Mike's cock.

Matt abruptly slapped Mike round the back of the head, Gibbs style, and Mike winced at the judgmental look in his friend's eyes. Matt always knew when Mike's thoughts took a turn for the Puck-ian, and smacked it right out of him. Both boys knew that approach wasn't gonna get Mike with Kurt, the gleek had too much class for that. Witness Puck's repeated failures to get into Kurt's skinnies as proof.

Mike had had a crush on Kurt ever since the lithe teen had swayed his way onto the football field and kicked a perfect field goal; then taught the whole team Beyonce's 'Single Ladies' dance, helping them win their first and only game of the season. The day Kurt quit the team had been the saddest of Mike's Sophomore year, since he could no longer sneak peeks at the gorgeous boy in the locker room showers.

Matt had judged him for that too. Holding that it was unfair for Mike to be watching Kurt shower when they all knew Kurt would never do the same, both out of a fear of being beaten up by the homophobes on the team, and because he was just too nice a guy to take advantage like that. Mike wasn't a nice guy however, and most definitely hadn't been above taking advantage of spying on Kurt's perfectly smooth marble skin, his perky bubble butt and his generous package.

Kurt had used the same shower gel the whole time he was on the team, and now even a whiff of artificial strawberry led to an immediate boner, awkward when the slushy company brought out a special edition strawberry flavour that one of the puckheads had proceeded to douse Mike and Matt in for the crime of being in Glee club. Yeah, that hadn't led to any uncomfortable conversations when he and Matt were cleaning up AT ALL. For the record, his bro was all kinds of crazy hot, but Mike preferred his boys lean and lithe.

He snapped back into the here-and-now as Rachel screeched loudly that they were ready for another take, and this time everything seemed to go perfect. Mike grinned broadly as he sprang back and forth between mattresses, and helped bounce Artie as the handicapable gleek succumbed to a fit of laughter.

But then IT happened. Kurt ran backwards between the mattresses, face set in a provocative leer as he made a come-hither gesture to the camera.

Mike's brain blue-screened and it was game over dude; cause that was just too damn hot. Matt could judge all he wanted but Mike was gonna have to do something or else he was gonna be returning his pajamas with a big stain on the crotch, and the embarrassment of that would probably kill him.

The second the director dude called cut, and he and the store manager both gave the happy smile of someone who'd gotten the take they wanted, Mike darted over to Kurt, seized one deceptively-delicate wrist and tugged, pulling him back into the warehouse. Plastic-wrapped mattresses towered over them as Mike pulled Kurt into a convenient corner, then paused, suddenly speechless as he took in the exertion flushed cheeks and performance-bright eyes.

Kurt raised an eyebrow as Mike's silence stretched on, then finally sighed and stepped forward, quickly brushing his lips over Mike's before sauntering away. As he headed back into the main part of the store, he called back over his shoulder, "As cute as the stunned puppy look is on you Michael, you're going to have to use your words like a big boy if you want to ask me out."

Mike cursed himself for being a ten year-old girl as he raised a trembling hand to his lips, as though trying to keep Kurt's kiss there forever. Next he knew he'd be doodling 'Mr Mike Chang-Hummel' in his notebook and giggling with Matt whenever Kurt looked at him. He slapped himself upside the back of his head, hard, and shook himself out before chasing after Kurt and pinning him to a mattress.

"Kurt. Do you wanna get all up on this?" He indicated himself with a langurous hand wave and a smirk, but his face fell when Kurt couldn't stifle a snort.

"Good Lord Chang, that was awful. I suggest you take your dating cues from someone who isn't Noah Puckerman before you try this again. But well done for managing an almost coherent sentence, definitely an improvement on the rabbit-in-headlights look, no matter how adorable you make it."

Mike pouted as Kurt fucking patted his cheek and walked away, swaying his hips in a highly distracting manner and actually wiggling his ass at Mike as he left the dancing jock's line of sight.

Matt rounded the corner into the warehouse and sighed at the look on Mike's face before wrapping an arm round his shoulder in a brief 'bro hug'. He then ruined the moment by slapping the back of Mike's head, shrugging off the resultant pout with the ease of long practice. He then held up his phone, on the screen of which was a new text message from Kurt. (And Mike wasn't at all upset that Matt had Kurt's number when he didn't. Nope, not at all.)

{Tell the Awkward Wonder that if he's serious about this then if he should happen to be at the revival theatre tonight I would not object to him accompanying me to see Singing in the Rain. I'll spring for the tickets if he buys the snacks. Kurt.}

Matt snorted and slapped Mike on the back bracingly. "Look on the bright side bro; if you sit through Singing in the fucking Rain for him he's gonna know you're serious and not just trying to get in his pants for a one-off."

Mike perked up at this. Plus his mom loved Singing in the Rain so it couldn't be THAT bad right? Either way he had a date with one Kurt Hummel, and he wasn't gonna mess it up. He suddenly looked down at himself and jumped in panic, he had to be at the theatre tonight and he was still in the pajamas! He grabbed Matt firmly and dragged his bro along with him.

They were gonna get changed and head over to Mike's place. Then Matt was gonna help him get ready for his date. He only had one chance to make Kurt's first date memorable, and he wasn't gonna screw it up. Kurt deserved the best. (and there went his inner preteen girl again)

He realised he'd gotten dressed on autopilot while thinking, and noted approvingly that Matt was likewise ready to go. Matt shuddered at the determined gleam in Mike's eyes, slumping and following his bro out of the store. They climbed into Mike's car and set off, Mike immediately opening his mouth with the first question that bubbled up when he thought of a date with Kurt, "Do you think I could rock a fedora?"

Matt just groaned in response.

Mike grinned. He got to torture his bro with 'does my butt look big in this' questions AND go on a date with Kurt Hummel. Best. Day. Ever.

AN: I don't think this is what MDemagogue had in mind when he prompted me, but my muse was in a fluffy mood today.

Enjoy anyway peoples!