Dreams

He did not really listen to what the doctors were saying. Those jargon were so foreign to his ears that he decided not to care anymore. He did not cry either even if his heart were to grow an extra mouth that allowed it to shout and scream in sadness. He was only a student, a middle-school student. What could he do? He could not help his mother.

If his mother had to leave him, he would have no one left in this world, except for his closest childhood friend. Luka would be with him and both of them could support each other's dreams, he knew it.

He just knew it... or so he thought.

Dearest Len,

I'm sorry for telling this good news now. I wanted to tell you months ago but because you have been stressing out about some family issues, I held back. Forgive me.

The good news is that ALICE Studio has recruited me as a model! I can finally become one! My first debut is next month and I really, really hope that you will be there to support me. Can I also ask you for a favour? It is about your promise with me. Remember?

I want to show off your very own designed clothes to the world! Let's grow together, alright?

Love,
Luka

After reading the letter, he stared at his mother's lifeless body and then closed his eyes. He knew it.

From the start, he knew he had no chance to achieve his dreams. He knew he was going to break all their promises and chase his newly found goal of his life.

He knew it all and decided to move on...

No, to run away, would be more accurate.

Chapter 49: Trust

Rin ran barefooted along the cold floor of the hospital, carrying her bagpack and her new pair of heels under her arms. She had been running since she entered into the hospital despite hearing voices telling her to stop running. The rear of her shoes had made the back of her feet sore and bleed, which made her no choice but take off her shoes as she searched for Len.

When she finally arrived outside the operation theater where she saw a familiar looking blonde squatting on the floor with his face hidden behind his arms and knees, she slowed down and headed towards him. Seeing him looking like that, her heart ached as she knew there was nothing she could do for him. Neither could she save his mother, nor could she prevent the misfortune. All she could do was to be by his side.

She stood in front of him and spoke in a soft voice, "Hey, I thought it was supposed to be at the ward."

Len looked up and stared at her for a brief moment before looking back down on his knees. "At least you have found your way here."

"I asked the nurses, that's why." Rin squatted next to him and leaned her head against the cold white wall. "What happened to your mother? You suddenly called me but I was having my afternoon training."

"Sorry, I..." Len paused and looked earnestly at Rin, which nearly caused her heart to stop momentarily. "I need your help for awhile."

Rin felt her heart begining to explode even though she felt bad for feeling this way. While he was undergoing such a tough time, she was actually feeling so jumpy. She could not help it at all because out of all people, Len had chosen to call her. Len was actually asking for her help! It was as if he was relying on her like close friends, or maybe boy-girlfriends, do. Furthermore, it was not all the time she could see that earnest look on his face while asking for her help, which made him look so vulnerable like a small child.

"What can I do for you?" she asked.

"Er... do you have any training later on?"

"Ye... I mean nope," Rin replied with a smile. "I'm free tonight. So, what can I do for you? Do you need me to accompany you until your mother's operation is over? Or do you need me to buy something for you to eat?"

Rin lied. Of course, she had a night training in the late evening but she did not want to tell him. If he knew, he being a 'no-skipping-lesson' type of universalist would have told her to be a good girl and go back to attend her training. But there was no way would she leave him alone like this! She knew Haku would help her to tell her trainer that she had some important matters to attend to.

"Really? You have nothing on? That's great. I thought... I was troubling you..." Len turned to look at her again with a weak smile. "Can you please... stay here?"

"St... sta... Stay here?" Rin stammered as she felt herself blushing, though guiltily. "S... sure! I'll stay here right next to you!"

Len flashed her another small smile and stood up. Her eyes followed him eagerly as he proceeded to stretch his arms and back. Then, he stopped and looked at her again.

"Thank you, Miss Kagamine."

"No, that's alri..."

"Please call me if anything happens," he interrupted her and waved slightly. "I'll be back."

"Eh?" Rin's eyes widened, looking very puzzled. "Where are you going?"

"Home."

Rin felt something hit her head hard. Though not literally, it somehow caused her to snap out of her sympathetic state. With a pair of trembling knees, she clumsily stood up and glared at him.

"What? Why are you so irresponsible? I thought you're better than this!" she shouted angrily and threw her heels on the floor.

The nurses who were walking past them stared at her with a frown while a doctor who had been standing a few metres away from them cleared his throat.

"That's right. I'm irresponsible," Len said as he ignored those stares around them. "Because of this, my mother is dying... without me knowing."

"Huh?"

"I'm going home to take my mother's health records and check on them. She must have been hiding them from me, that's why I didn't know that..." Closing his eyes, Len rubbed his forehead and let out a long sigh. "I should have known... it was too good to be true."

"What do you mean?"

"To put it simply, my mother didn't tell me anything about her health even though she visited the doctor everyday which I had no clue about that as well. And I'm not responsible enough to check her health records," he explained. "I stupidly believe her."

Rin shook her head and said, "Don't say like that! I'm sure your mother has a reason for not telling you. Maybe... she didn't want to worry you."

Feeling so bad for wronging him, Rin mentally slapped herself. Of course, there was no way Len would leave his mother alone. Perhaps that was why he called her to stay in the hospital in his stead while he looked for the health records. Rin clicked her tongue in anger and guilt. How could she doubt his trust in her?

"But still... I don't like the fact she hid everything from me," Len mumbled softly which was barely heard by Rin.

Just then, a doctor with a white mask on came out of the operation theatre, holding onto a small plastic container of red fluid and heading towards their direction. He eyed at Len looking displeased and stopped right in front of Len.

"So?" the doctor's voice sounded muffled behind the mask.

Len looked at him coldly without saying a word. Anyway, he knew what this doctor was going to say.

"While your mother visited us every single day, what were you doing? Each time we told her to bring you along, she would say that you were busy. How busy can you get? Couldn't you just take a day off and follow her to see the doctor? What's so difficult about it?" the doctor continued. "Her heart disease has worsened and yet, you..."

"He is not like that!" Rin interjected loudly and pushed Len away.

She stood in front of Len and stared hard at the doctor. Her hands were trembling with anger and she had the urge to land her fist on this doctor's face, pull his hair out and kick his stomach so hard that his lunch would come flying out of his big mouth. Talking bad about Len in front of her was definitely a bad idea...

"Well, Miss, am I wrong?" the doctor spoke arrogantly.

Rin tilted her head upwards and grunted, "Who are you to say that?"

"Quit it, Miss Kagamine. He's just an intern," Len butted into their little contest and smirked at the doctor. "After all, I heard we can rate his service when the operation is done."

The intern quickly tugged his white coat to hide his name tag and glared at Len. However, Len just ran his forefinger against his own left chest and smiled.

"The word intern is just there. I couldn't help but to notice it." Len crossed his arms and chuckled softly. "Your mentor had already spoken to me. I don't need another idiot to remind me how irresponsible I am."

"I... Idiot?! How dare you!"

"Well, what do you know about me?"

The doctor stared wide-eye at Len as the latter moved closer to him. His cerulean eyes became dull and his smile vanished. The doctor took a small step back and began to look away from his eyes uneasily.

"I'm Len Kagamine, not you."

This was probably the first time had Rin seen Len being so scary and intimidating... even while using that sexy husky voice of his.

-:-:-:-

"I have already said..." Len stopped walking and swiftly turned around to look at the girl tailing behind him. "Don't follow me."

Rin pouted and caught up with him, stomping angrily as she walked. "I have told you too! I want to help you!"

"Help me by staying at the hospital then!"

"No, I want to find the records with you!"

"Don't be a brat!"

"You're the one who's the brat!" Rin bit her lips and frowned at him. "At least try to trust the doctors there."

Len groaned and rolled his eyes. As if he would want to trust those doctors after seeing that haughty intern! But as he looked at Rin's unwavering eyes, he admitted defeat. Perhaps he should do something with his trust issues. He took out his house key and slotted it into the key lock. Before he opened the door, he turned to look at Rin again and felt something warm in his chest.

She was staring at him. Not just a plain stare but a determined and stern one which she only put on when she was...

Len immediately hid his flustered face from her and mentally shouted. Where had he seen that kind of look before?! It was Rin, for goodness sake! Rin Kagamine, the dreamy, clumsy and bipolar brat! And why the hell was he feeling so 'warm' about that look? He must have gone crazy after all those stressful events earlier.

"Hurry up and open the door," Rin's voice interrupted his mental frets.

He gulped and nodded rigidly as his shaky hand twisted and turned the key many times before he could finally unlock the door. Well, that was his first time having a hard time trying to unlock his apartment door. He could feel his whole face turning beet red due to the embarrassment.

He pushed open the door and let Rin into his apartment. It felt so long since she had left this place which she nearly wanted to call home. Staying with them was so different from staying with her own parents. Len's mother was not pushy and demanding; she understood his intentions and feelings, and even worried for him even though she should have been worrying about herself more than others. She was so different from Rin's parents who only worried about money and reputation. Both Len and Rin were from the Kagamine families, yet the two families were totally in two different worlds.

That was why she wanted to understand his world. However, each time she tried to enter into his world, he would push her away. If only he could allow her to learn more about him...

"I shall search my mother's bedroom. Can you please search the living room instead? This will make the searching faster," Len spoke as he closed the apartment door behind him.

Rin smiled at him and nodded enthusiastically. After seeing him disappear into his mother's bedroom, Rin scanned the living room, wondering which area she should start her search first. There was nothing on the couch and the small coffee table. Based on her detective intuition, such secretive records should be hidden...

Her gaze slowly fell upon the dark space beneath the couch.

Yes, under the couch. As quoted from various crime dramas she had watched, 'mysteries were always hidden under the couch or the bed'. Usually, what lay in that narrow dark space would be the key to solving a case. Rin smirked as she thought maybe she could work as a detective instead.

She walked towards the couch and lay flat with her tummy on the cooling floor. Her hand carefully went under the couch and she swiped her hand across the floor which was apparently a little dusty. It seemed there was nothing underneath the couch. Withdrewing her hand, she craned her neck to the side and scanned the rest of the living room again until she noticed a chest of drawers located near the kitchen. Could the records be found there? No, it couldn't be because it was an obvious place to hide them.

She stood up and headed towards the drawers. There was no harm checking it, right? She thought to herself as she pulled open the first drawer only to see keys and small empty glass bottles. Then, she closed it and pulled open the second one. There were recipes, sewing books and a few pieces of receipts. Curiously, she picked up the receipts and looked through it. Perhaps there would be evidences of Len's mother purchasing medications which might give them some hint what kind of problem she had been suffering from. Instead, as she looked through the receipts, she found that the receipts were mostly about the purchase of the recipe books and a sewing machine. Much to her surprise, the sewing machine was bought on...

Rin covered her gaping mouth with the receipt and slowly turned her head around to take a look at what Len was doing. Since the bedroom was directly facing her though at least five metres away from where she was standing, she could see him rummaging through a cupboard in a haphazard manner. Luckily for her, he was not looking at her way.

"He..." Rin muttered to herself softly, making sure Len could not hear her at all. "Last week... he bought that... because of me..."

She quickly turned her head back and looked at the receipts again. As much as she hated to say this to herself this all over again and at this critical moment, she admitted falling for him and his actions made her fall for him even more. Like sitting on a roller coaster, she felt herself falling in love with him over and over again even though she knew he was so hard to reach. He was so close, yet so distant which sometimes made her so frustrated that she wanted to hate him instead. But she could not bring herself to hate him too.

She placed the receipts back into the drawer and closed it. She pulled open the third drawer and her eyes immediately widened when she took a look inside. The first thing that caught her eyes was a rough sketch of her outfit. She knew it was her cheerleading outfit, no doubt about that! The detailed measurements fascinated her and that got her thinking.

Where in the world did he get her body measurements from?

Her face turned bright red as she thought of the worst possible scenario of him finding out her body measurements.

"That pervert!" she shrieked and turned to glare at Len.

Her sharp voice startled Len, causing him to jump in fright and look at her with wide questioning eyes.

"Is... Is there anything wr... wrong?" he stammered, not knowing why she was angry all of the sudden.

"Yes, there is. I want to know," Rin bellowed menacingly and held up his sketch. "How did you old perverted pedophile know my body measurements? What did you do with my body? Answer me!"

"Huh?" Len knitted his eyebrows together and stared hard at the sketch. "Oh that... why should I tell you?"

Rin gasped. "Pervert!"

"Say whatever you want but I'm telling you that I did it quite ethically," Len said with a small smirk.

Rin shrieked again. That jerk! Quite ethically? His smirk had made his statement more unreliable.

"That outfit sure fitted you well. I wonder how," Len continued and pretended to think by pressing his forefinger against his chin. "I guess a pervert will only think about the perverted possibilities, don't you think so?"

Rin's mouth twitched in annoyance. So, he was telling her that she was a pervert after all. Then, what exactly did he do to find out her body measurements?

Seeing how flustered she was, Len looked away and let out a soft chuckle. Rin flinched and shrieked even louder.

"What did you do to my body, you pervert?" she shouted and stomped her left foot on the floor many times.

She swore she would never ever forgive him. Stealing a woman's dignity is not forgiveable. And he was the worst for doing so! That perverted old man...

"That hug, remember?" Len answered and this time he was looking at her with soft eyes. "I had you wrapped your arms around my waist and that measurement was for making your sleeves."

Upon hearing that, Rin's jaw dropped. So was that hug a lie? She remembered getting a little carried away by his embrace and had even wanted that moment to last longer. But everything was actually a lie. What was the meaning of this?

Ignoring how disappointed Rin looked, Len continued with a smile, "And remember that purple dress? I based on that to make the rest of the outfit."

"Enough." Rin held up her hand to stop him from rumbling on and she rubbed her forehead with a long sigh. "You're talented, alright? You can actually based on our embrace to determine my arm length. I thought... that hug..."

"What were you thinking?"

Rin looked at him quizzically. "What?"

"That hug," As he spoke the two words, his smile earlier vanished and he stared seriously at her. "What were you thinking about?"

Rin held her breath as her ocean blue eyes stared into his cerulean ones. It was as if he was hunting for her deepest thoughts in reply to his question just by looking through her eyes. Eyes were like a pair of windows. She wondered if hers were opened which could allow anyone to see through her and read her throughts. As far as she knew, Len had never seen through her properly. Neither could she see through his. Probably she was the only one who could not understand him but one thing she knew for sure: his windows were tightly closed.

"You were thinking about perverted stuffs, right?" Len spoke again and laughed. "Well, I'm not surprised though. You love touching me anyway..."

"That's right. I'm a pervert. I love that hug. So what?" Rin interrupted him with a deep frown. "I was thinking... no, wishing that your embrace would last even longer. I wished you did not slam that door right in front of my face. Do you want to know why?"

She felt like disintegrating into the air after blurting out so many of her embarrassing thoughts to him. To him out of all people, for heaven's sake! Worst of all, Len just sat there gawking at her, not knowing what to say or think.

Rin clenched her fist, nearly crumpling the sketch, and continued, "Because I wanted to hug you longer! Friends hug each other, right? What's so embarrassing about it? What's wrong with it?"

"You're right. What is wrong with hugging each other? It was just for measurements the last time," Len stated casually which made Rin's already bad mood even worse. "Let's stop talking, shall we? I need to find the records fast and return to the hospital."

Her hand which was holding onto the sketch fell to her side and she hung her head low. "Just for measurements, huh..."

Her chest hurt when she repeated that statement again softly to herself. She immediately turned back to face the drawers and put the sketch back into the third drawer. After closing it, she pressed both of her palms against her warm and slightly moist eyes, and inhaled deeply to cool herself down.

Don't cry, Rin. He's not worth to cry for. He is an ultimate idiot...

"Found them."

Although she heard him, she still refused to look at him so she decided to remain standing there with her back facing him. Since he had found the records, she had nothing to do with him anymore.

"Miss Kagamine, you can take a rest now."

She bit her lower lip and continued to ignore him.

"It seems that her blood pressure kept increasing. Oh, hypertension? Wait, it's not? Heart block? Huh?"

She heard him signing away after he had read the first few pages of the reports.

"How could she hide these from me? All along I thought she went out for a stroll or something. I'm so stupid. She was actually going for her daily check-up."

Rin slowly turned around and peeped at him through the small gaps between her fingers. He looked so worried and stressed while scanning through the file of his mother's medical reports. Seeing his face like that, she had an urge to run towards him and hug him from behind, making sure that she would give him plenty of comfort and ease his inner pain.

Gosh, she hated herself for feeling this way. She wanted to have nothing to do with him anymore and get lost from this apartment. On the other hand, she still wanted to stay with him and comfort him as well. What a dilemma!

"With these, let's return to the hospital. The operation should be over by now."

"What exactly happened to her?" Rin forced those words out of her mouth but her voice turned out weak and quivering.

"The doctors said she had a heart attack. She may not make it at all... because this is her second time."

Rin's hands dropped to her mouth and muffled her soft gasp. Len's mother might die. Why all of a sudden? She was looking quite good when she had last seen her. Rin knew his mother had a heart disease so she could not put so much stress on herself, but Rin never knew what kind of heart disease she was suffering from. Len must be shocked to find out about her situation. Furthermore, his mother was the only person left in this world for him.

"She can make it!" Rin cried and walked towards him. "Have some faith in her. She will live on for you because she loves you."

She fell onto her knees and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. She rested her head on his shoulder and murmured words like 'she will be fine' and 'God is merciful'. Her hand gently stroke his back and she felt his tense shoulders slowly relaxed.

"Miss Kagamine..." It was his turn to make a quivering voice, sounding as if he was holding back his cry but nevertheless, Rin tightened her embrace around him trying her best to soothe his pain. "Thank you."

"No, it's okay. No matter what happens, I will be there for you."

She did not know how long she kept her arms around him but when he finally calmed down, she released him and touched his tear-stained face. She rubbed away the small beads of tears from his eyes and smiled gently at him.

"I... I need a change," Len muttered and stood up, looking away from her. "There's a stupid stain on my back."

"Stain?" Rin crooked her head a little to the side and spotted something pinkish on his back.

She frowned. That stain looked like...

With an awkward laugh, Len quickly back away and put the file of medical records on his back, trying to hide that stain from her though he had forgotten the exact spot where Luka had brushed her lips on. He walked sideways towards the door as he forced a smile at Rin.

"Wait a moment, okay? I'll change fast."

Rin's face darkened but she managed to force a smile on her face too. "You better do so... pervert."

Whoops! Len better washed that stain off! :)
Chapter 50 will be uploaded soon. Just an early notification, as my semester is starting very soon, I will be having a break from Fanfiction to focus on my studies. Chapter 51 will be continued after my semester. Hope it is okay for you all. I really seek for your understanding. Thanks a lot!

Special thanks to the lovely reviewers:

- Azure-Blue-15
- Lalala
- Burned Blue Cookie
- Orika
- JulietteViolet
- kairi645

Next, I would also like to thank those who had story alerted and favourited this story. You all are so wonderful! :D

Preview of the next chapter:

Chapter 50: His Decision

Upon seeing Len's facial features started to relax, she felt herself slowly relax as well and her grip around his arm loosened. She returned a smile and a hand reached for his face, wanting to rub off the obvious tears that were welling up in his eyes again. She really felt like his girlfriend for doing so.

"There, there... You're going to cry again," Rin spoke in a gentle voice while rubbing her thumb across his lower eyelids.

Till next time~