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Chapter 9
After Tilly left the coffee shop Jen had never listened to another word Hellon was saying. She wasn't interested one little bit. She knew Tilly still loved her now, she understood now why Tilly didn't look so interested when around Ester. How she couldn't connect with Ester like she always did with Jen. That was the reason. She loved her. Neither had admitted it to there one anothers faces and that was the worst thing about the break up because both Jen and Tilly had fell in love like never before.
Tilly would have possibly told Jen she was in love with her when they were together if Jen didn't keep referring as there relationship as nothing serious, as a little bit of fun. Jen was just to scared to being hurt from Tilly. She knew once she'd let her barriers down with Tilly there was no going back. And she knew Tilly would be the one who would finally make or break her all together. It hurt her so much to hear it, to remind herself of the way she actually treated Tilly. Like they were nothing special, that she ment nothing to her. Jen felt a lump form in her throte as she remembered one of there conversations which took place in the shack. When Jen referred Tilly to being a dirty little secret, telling Tilly if it wasn't what she wanted to just walk away, knowing full well Tilly was way to powerless to even think of doing a thing like that.
Ester had stayed in the coffee shop after Tilly left. She felt lost, she couldn't help but feel she'd been to clingy towards Tilly when she least needed it, she'd been clinging on as much as she could and now she'd pushed Tilly away. After finally reconecting there relationship. Ester felt like she loved Tilly straight away, but Tilly still only felt like the pair were friends. There was no flirty banter between the two, no passionate moments, they didn't kiss. They just acted like friends, really good friends and that was the exact way Tilly wanted it to be. Ester was sat on the sofa oppisate Jen and Hellon still crying. Jen could see Ester couldn't quite get her head around it all. It was all such a mess for her. But Jen was soon knocked out of her thoughts of Tilly when Hellon reminded her about there night out tonight and how it was nearly time to return back to College. She couldn't exactly just call the whole thing off now could she? Just because she was reminded of Tillys love for her. Yes, Tilly might be in love with her but it didnt mean Tilly was just going to welcome her back with open arms.
But Hellon had kind of put Jen of her a little when Tillys and Esters argument was going on infront of everyone. She was getting way to into it, like trying to listen harder to find out everything they were saying. It was like a movie to Hellon and she was kind of enjoying seeing the pain of the younger girls. It got to Jen a little when Hellon referred Tilly to being a bitch where Jen stood up for her instantly causing Hellon to apolizies immediatly.
Jen carried on with her conversation with Hellon. Agreeing what time they'd be meeting up and where? Then said goodbye. As she was about to walk out of the college coffee there was an instant reminder Ester was still sat crying. So Jen slowly walked backwards and placed herself down beside Ester. ''Its time to come back to college Ester'' Jen spoke softly. ''I know'' Ester replied. ''Come on then I will walk with you'' said Jen. ''It's alright miss, I am just going to head home don't feel to good. Tilly's gone home to I think I will pop around there'' replied Ester. ''Tillys gone home? but the college day isnt over yet'' said Jen. ''I know but she's got a lot on her mind. We broke up'' said Ester trying to comfort herself of Tilly being just as hurt, which totally wasnt the case at all. ''I'm sorry Ester'' said Jen. ''I just don't get it. I kissed her when she was drunk and she was ok with it, then ever since she's barly even achkowleged us to being together, there was just no connection from her direction what so ever and now she says shes in love with someone else'' Ester cried. ''Mabye she just sees you better as a friend thats all'' said Jen. ''Yeah, I guess'' replied Ester.
Tilly was back at the house in no time, she was furious with Ester for showing a scene in a place where they have to sit almost every day. It was stupid, she told Ester to talk about it elsewhere but she didn't listen she just kept talking and talking. Tilly wasn't even listening to most of it, she was more focused on being showed up infront of Jen. Her real lover. Tilly knows how Ester must have felt, but still that was no way to go on. Esters always saying how people get the wrong idea of her. But when she's making scenes like that, begging for someone to stay with her it just makes her look desperate. Tilly needed to sort this, tell her straight. Friends or nothing. Harsh but the truth, there was no point leading Ester on any longer than she already had. So she sent Ester a message.
Round my house as soon as possible! Need to sort this whole situation out before it gets out of hand. T
Ester instantly pulled her phone out of her pocked still in the company of Jen. She read the message again and again before realising this whole conversation wasn't going to go so well after the way she'd reacted infront of everyone. ''I have to go, Tilly wants me around hers now!'' Ester said scared. ''Look, it will be alright. But I would rather yous do it another time college starts soon'' said Jen. ''Sorry miss but she seams a little angry, get this sorted as soon as possible'' Ester nervously laughed. ''Well, I didn't know anything about it yes?'' said Jen. ''Thanks'' replied Ester as she hurried her way out of the coffee shop and straight towards Tillys.
Jen was back in her class room trying to think of how the conversation could have been going. Mabye Tilly felt bad for doing what she did? and now she was about to take her back. This was all to much to deal with, the more Jen thought about it all the more it distracted her from teaching her studants. She just wished she still had Tillys phone number so she could ask how she was doing? without sounding like she was intruding after finding out Tilly was in love with her.
Ester arrived at Tillys in no time. Ester was in a bit of a state throughout the whole conversation of not being together anymore, and Tilly only seeing Ester as a good friend. But in the end Tilly finally cracked it and got through to Ester. Tilly took the conversation quite slow, and was quite slow with the whole thing. With her being put through the conversation with Jen multiple times she knew exactly how the whole thing felt. So she was simpathetic to her. Tilly told Ester she would always be a true friend to Ester and she would always be there when Ester needed no matter what and Ester accepted and left.
Hours later Tilly woke up on the sofa, everything she'd been through had finally worn her out and with her not having much sleep last night she definetly must of needed it. Tillys parents were away till tomorrow morning so she didn't have much to do. She tried to occupy herself by doing a little bit of sketching but that didnt work. Her mind was elsehwere. If not on Jen then the funeral was playing on her mind. Guess it was back to the shop for some much needed alcohol. Just not as much as last night or she'd barly be able to get herself out of bed tomorrow never mind be there for her friends when they needed her.
Just as Jen was waiting at the end of Dianes she spotted Tilly walking towards the shop. Jen didnt know what to do. Run, hide. Of course she couldn't do that. It would look a little too obvious to the woman who was clearly into her and the woman who was slowly approaching her. God what the hell was she going to do?
Tilly arrived back out of the shop with two bottles of wine. When she instantly seen the figure she almost knew to well. With the same woman she was with in the coffee shop. Hugging, in the middle of the road. Bitch Tilly thought. But she shuck her head. She had to right to be mad, after all she'd been with Ester for the past week. She had no right to be jelous. She acted like she'd moved on to Jen and now Jen was doing the same. If only Jen knew how I truley felt about her she thought. Tilly put down her head and carried on walking, she didnt want Jen to start making conversation with her when she had company. But the stupid bitch Jen was with stopped her instead. Jen nearly died, Hellon didn't even know her and she was stopping her. This whole thing could go pear shaped Jen thought.
''Special night?'' Hellon asked. Tilly just looked up and looked confused at her. ''What?'' Tilly asked. ''The bottles of wine you got there special night planned?'' she asked again. ''Erm, no just me'' Tilly replied. ''How you feeling from before, I couldn't help but notice you were in a bad way'' said Hellon. ''I'm fine, never been better'' replied Tilly. Hellon was really starting to get on her nerves asking her questions when she didnt even know her name or anything about her. ''Ah right well you could come out for a drink with us if you need some company'' said Hellon. ''I'll pass. Thanks'' Tilly replied turning on her heal to walk away. ''No need to be rude about it'' Hellon snarlled. Jen just looked at her. What the hell was she playing at? She doesn't know half of what Tilly had been though. ''I'm not being rude, I just don't need you questionning me about my life when I don't know who you are. Thanks for the concern but you can go enjoy yourself now'' replied Tilly walking away. ''She was to good for you anyway'' Hellon shouted taking Jens hand and walking away.
How Tilly didnt run back and punch the bitch in her face she did not know, and Jen for that matter. It was disrespectful just asking her questions in the first place never mind anything else she said. Jen didn't like this girl one bit. She pissed her of big time. ''You shouldn't of acted that way towards her'' Jen said. ''Ah who cares, she only had a breakup its not like its the end of the world'' replied Hellon confused to why Jen was sticking up for her. ''It was none of your business, and she's been through a lot actually'' said Jen. ''Come on then, enliten me'' Hellon snarled. ''I think I will just go home, and for your information when your burrying three of your best friends come tell me how you like it yeah?'' said Jen and with that she walked away. Back to Dianes it was.
So Jens moved on, her knew girl is a total bitch and here I am, all alone drinking wine like a loser. Brilliant.