Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy, or its characters and storylines. Those all belong to Shonda Rhimes and ABC.

Little Moments: Season 9

Waking in the Woods (Episode 2):

Callie Torres sat at her wife's bedside for three hours before she moved. She was afraid to shift the weight of her weary body around. She was afraid to swallow. Afraid to breath. Arizona was asleep, and the brunette who valued her life more than anything was deathly afraid of her waking.

Of course, she wanted her wife to wake up. She wanted to spend the rest of her days with the blonde Peds surgeon- save patients, raise children, grow old together, But there was a fear resonating deep within Callie, and she desperately hoped that Arizona would stay asleep a few more hours- postpone the inevitable truth from coming out. Callie made the choice to have her wife's leg removed. And if given the choice again, she would choose amputation every time. But she broke a promise, and she didn't know how easily Arizona would forgive her.

Callie was suddenly broken from her thoughts when she heard a light tapping at the door. She glanced behind her, still trying so hard not to rouse the beautiful, peacefully sleeping blonde. It was Bailey. Callie waved her in ever so gently, whispering, "Shhh," to Arizona, like they would their daughter.

Miranda Bailey could see the tension in Callie's body…the anxiety, the fear, the guilt. She walked up behind Callie and laid a hand down on her shoulder as she looked over Arizona, assessing her medical condition and searching for a sign that she would be alright.

"How is she?" Bailey asked as she slid into the chair opposite Callie and scanned the monitors. "Looks like her BP and Oxygen levels are almost in the normal range."

"Yeah, stats are okay," Callie breathed out, her hushed voice barely audible. "They've got her on Heparin to prevent thrombosis and clotting. She's still on triple antibiotics for the infection, but it's too early to tell how effectively they're working. She's…sh-she's definitely not out of the woods just yet," Callie stammered, her nervous tone followed by an almost maniacal chuckle.

The irony of that statement made it impossible for the brunette not to crack up. Arizona was very much still in the woods, every day haunting her like the terrifying experience following the plane crash.

"What's so funny?" Miranda asked, eyebrows raised in confusion. The older doctor stared at her friend as she laughed wildly, the stress of the situation clearly getting to her. "Maybe you should get some sleep, Callie," she suggested. "I can stay with her and…"

"No. No sleep," Callie stated, matter-of-factly. There would be no budging on this. She was not leaving her wife for even a split second. Not lying down on the cot and getting some rest. Not taking her eyes off Arizona for a minute.

"She's going to hate me, Bailey," Callie said after a moment of silence. "She's been begging me for weeks now to do something…to, to help her get better and get out of this damn hospital in once piece. She was so upset and I…I-I promised her that…"

Just then, Arizona's eyes fluttered open for a second and her body trembled as if she were still out in that freezing, cold forest. "Mark…don't go to sleep, Mark," the blonde mumbled before exhaustion began to take over again.

"Shhhh," Callie whispered again, placing a tender kiss to her wife's forehead as she pulled the blankets up around her fragile, injured body. "Muy bien, eres mi amor. Todo va a estar bien," the brunette told Arizona, making her a promise she would hopefully be able to keep this time.

Miranda Bailey didn't know much Spanish, but she could hear the emotion in her friend's voice. Callie Torres loved her wife with all of her heart, and she desperately needed Arizona to be okay. That was as plain to see as the stars shining in the night sky.

Bailey reached across the bed and squeezed Callie's hand. "She's going to be just fine, Torres," she said with confidence. "She is way too stubborn and pig-headed to let this accident beat her. Come on, now…"

"Physically, I know she'll be fine," Callie replied, her words once again followed by terrified laughter. "Well, as fine as anyone can be with one leg."

"Yes. She's going to need therapy. Lots of it," Bailey said, glancing at the empty space where Arizona's left leg used to be. "It may take months of work, but with a prosthetic…"

"She didn't want a prosthetic, Bailey," Callie screeched, inadvertently raising her voice.

Arizona moved again, the sudden noise startling her from her slumber. "What? Where…w-where am I?" she yelled as she tried to sit up. "Mark….wake up, Mark. Don't die on me. Please, don't leave me. I'm scared and, a-and…"

"You don't need to be scared, sweetie," Callie assured her wife, holding a pale hand within her own. "I'm here. And Mark-well, let's not…" Callie trailed, not wanting to tell her wife that Mark had slipped back into a coma while she was in surgery. "You talked to Mark on the phone this morning, remember? He loves you, Arizona. And he, h-he wants you to get better."

But Arizona wasn't coherent. She wasn't living in present time. As Callie had so perfectly put it, she was not out of the woods. She was stuck, reliving her traumatic situation over and over again. Her mind, coupled with the anesthetics and pain killers, prevented her from waking up to reality just yet. And as hard as it was to watch her love fight the memories, Callie was grateful. At least, Arizona didn't know about her leg just yet. Or about Mark. Callie wished she didn't know about those things either.

"Poor thing," Bailey whispered, swallowing the sudden lump in her throat as she listened to Arizona cry out. "I don't know what it was like out there in those woods, Callie. But I saw them all in that hospital in Idaho. Every single one of them was like this then. Crying and screaming about bugs, and wolves, and who needed what medical treatment. Meredith didn't even realize that Lexie had…"

"Lexie's dead," Arizona supplied, momentarily appearing as if she had woken up and joined the conversation. But she was merely picking up on the auditory information her brain was trying to process. Her eyes were closed as she thrashed her head from side to side. "I want to go home," the blonde begged, tears spilling forth in her slumber. "I want to go home to Callie…"

And then the tears fells from Callie's eyes too, the pain of it all finally catching up to her again. "You're home, baby," she told her beloved wife, running her fingers through Arizona's golden tresses. "You're home and…a-and I'm right here."

Even Miranda Bailey couldn't help the tears that were now burning the back of her eyes. She hated to see anyone in such distress, especially a friend. And now, she had two dear friends fighting for their lives, albeit in very different ways. Arizona was fighting to survive…to get past the trauma…to live. And Callie was fighting to keep it all together…for her wife, and Mark, and their child. None of it was fair, and Bailey cursed the universe for doing this to any of them again.

"Is there something- anything I can do?" the older surgeon asked as she once again put a comforting hand on Callie's. "Can I bring you something to eat? I know you won't leave her to go to the cafeteria."

"No. I'm fine," Callie replied, wiping the remnants of her distress from her cheeks. "Meredith brought me something after she left Derek earlier. And she sat here until I ate it, so I'm good."

"What about Sofia?" Bailey inquired, the late hour suddenly dawning on her. She glanced at the clock…eleven forty three. "Well, I guess you've got that covered."

Callie nodded, also checking the clock for the first time in hours. "Babysitter. Luckily, she was available and offered to spend the night so I could stay with Arizona."

Bailey looked over at the cot and realized there was only a crumby sheet draped over the top of it. So she excused herself for a moment, then returned with two nice, warm blankets and a pillow. "Not that you'll use them," she mumbled as she placed the items on the cot.

Callie looked over at her and smiled, even though tears were still streaming down her face. "Thanks, Miranda," she whispered, meeting her dear friend's eyes briefly before turning her attention back to Arizona.

"Hopefully, the anesthesia will wear off soon and she'll wake up," Bailey said, trying to instill a bit of hope. "Then you'll see that everything is going to be okay. Then maybe- just maybe, you'll go home and get some rest. You're going to need it to take care of your girls."

Callie thought about going home…about the place she once longed to be even more than the operating room.

She thought about the family dinners that would never be the same. How one member of their somewhat strange, but effective parenting triangle may never be joining them at the table again. Mark's surge had given her some hope, but now, just like Arizona's leg, that was ripped away. He was in a coma, and everyone knew the prognosis wasn't good.

Callie's thoughts then wandered to the beautiful, sweet little girl she and Arizona, and Mark had been raising together. How in one day, Sofia went from having an overabundance of parents to, essentially, a single mother. The brunette wasn't so sure she could do it alone. Without Mark, her and Arizona could survive. They could make it work. But Callie couldn't make anything work without her wife, and she honestly didn't know if Arizona would come back to her. She was fairly certain the blonde would recover physically. But spiritually and emotionally, Callie knew Arizona would never be the same.

She wondered what life would be like from now on. She wondered whether she would ever again have the pleasure of worshipping the gorgeous blonde lying before her. No matter what Arizona thought, Callie still found her to be the most beautiful woman on earth. Leg or no leg, Callie still wanted to be with her wife…to touch her, and taste her, and love her.

She was just so grateful that Arizona survived the crash. Although it saddened her immensely, Callie could imagine a world without her best friend and the father of her child. She could imagine a world without Heelies, or sexy stilettos, or two legs wrapped around her naked body. But she could not imagine a world without her soul mate. There was never any choice. Arizona's life had to be saved.

But what if Arizona couldn't forgive her? What if she didn't understand? Callie wondered if her home…her bed…her life would remain empty and cold, like they had been for the past fifty one days. Yes, fifty one exactly. It was hard not to count the miserable, lonely nights without Arizona in her arms.

The brunette thought about the perky, overly optimistic woman she had fallen in love with years ago. Surely, that Arizona would have understood. She would have been grateful for her life and found the will to walk again. The old Arizona was full of life and sunshine, very much unlike the woman she had become these past few months. This new Arizona was dark and full of rain clouds, just like the Seattle skies.

"I just want the sunshine back," Callie whispered, unaware her thoughts were coming through her lips. "And there is no sunshine at home anymore. I hate being there."

"Hmmm?" Bailey mumbled, her eyes popping open wide. Since the survivors returned from Idaho, the poor woman had been spending every waking hour at the hospital. Apparently, exhaustion had caught up with her and she had dozed off.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Callie whispered, reaching across the bed to grab Miranda's arm. "You should go home…get some rest."

"That's funny coming from you," Bailey scoffed, rolling her eyes. "I'll go home in a bit. But right now, you're gonna tell me what exactly is going on in that head of yours."

"Hmmm," Callie chuckled, shaking her head. "You don't want to know."

"Try me," Bailey replied, sitting up straight in the chair. When Callie stayed silent, the older doctor gave her an evil glare, hoping it would frighten her into talking. No such luck. "You need to talk about it, Callie," she finally pleaded after another stretch of silence.

"Fine," Callie mumbled, crossing her arms over her chest. "I was just saying that I hate going home now."

"Well, that's understandable," Bailey said, offering her friend a sympathetic smile. "Your whole life's been turned upside down since the plane crash. Your best friend is umm, umm…yeah, you and I both know what's happening with Mark. And your wife has been stuck in this hospital for months. You must feel alone. But you're not, Callie. You have me, and the rest of us here, and Sofia. You have Sofia."

"Sofia," Callie cried, burying her face in her hands. "She's…sh-she's doomed. It's, it's like her life is doomed already. She's in a major car accident before she's even born. But she survives. And then this…"

"I know, Callie," Bailey whispered, rubbing her friends back. "It's not fair, Callie. But your little girl is tough, just like her two mothers. She will get through this. So will Arizona. And so will you."

"Hmm. I'm, not so sure about that," Callie told the other woman, sadness once again sweeping across her face. "You don't get it, Miranda. I'm here, in this Hell with Mark and Arizona all day long…while I'm working. I'm still working, trying so hard to keep them all happy. My patients. Mark…Derek…Cristina. My wife. My baby. I just…I just don't want to be responsible for all of that, you know?"

Bailey nodded her head as she continued to rub small circles over the brunette's back, encouraging Callie to get it all out. "And I can't wait to get out of here everyday. By five o'clock, I've been running back and forth…and worrying…and crying in on-call rooms half the day. I just want it all to end. I want the day to be over. And then, it is. My shift ends and I go pick up Sofia. And for about an hour every night, I forget how horrible life is.

"Oh, Callie," Bailey whined, swallowing the lump in her throat.

"I play with my daughter, and cook us dinner, and laugh at Sofia splashing me while she takes a tubby," Callie continued, her fists clenched at her sides. "And we're so tired then. The baby and I are both so, so tired. But then it starts all over. The elevator across from the apartment dings, or there is a knock on a door down the hall. And Sofia calls out for Mark. She hears that damn door and she thinks it's gonna be her daddy. She doesn't understand, Bailey. I can't explain it to her. All my poor Sofia knows is that the daddy she is used to seeing everyday hasn't been around."

Callie sucked in a deep breath, her emotional rant taking all the oxygen from her pained lungs. She looked over at Arizona's face and the tears instantly resurfaced. "And then, there's her mama," Callie said, her voice back down to a whisper. "I know she gets to see Arizona every day at the hospital. You, and Meredith, and the daycare teachers have been so great about bringing Sofia by to visit. But it's not the same. She…sh-she c-can't sleep without her mama. She just cries for Arizona, over and over, and over again…every night. Sometimes it's just for a few minutes. But sometimes, it's hours. Hours of holding my baby and not being able to comfort her. Hours of begging a one and half year old to accept the fact that I'm all she's got right now."

"And you're amazing," Bailey chimed in before Callie could go any further. "You are a great mother, Callie Torres. You are doing everything you can to keep your daughter healthy and happy. That's all you can do."

"But she's not happy, Bailey. None of us are happy," Callie reminded her friend as two sets of brown eyes met. "I want my life back. I want her back," Callie cried, laying her head down on the one leg her wife had left.

Arizona's eyes fluttered open when she felt the familiar weight on her body. "Cal…Callie?" she groaned, blue eyes trying desperately to stay open.

"Arizona?" the brunette exclaimed, her head quickly popping up. "Yes, it's me. I'm right here, honey."

"See. I told you she'd wake up," Bailey whispered, placing a quick, but tender kiss to the top of Callie's head and giving Arizona's hand a squeeze before she turned to leave the room. "Everything will be okay," she said as she reached the doorway, forcing a smile. "You take care of each other."

Callie inhaled sharply and slid her chair as close to her wife as possible. Finally, the moment she had been dreading was upon her. Within minutes, Arizona would learn of the deadly infection that had coursed through her body and threatened to take her life. She would learn of the intubation, and the surgery, and the amputation. She would learn of the decision her wife had made, and therefore, the promise her wife had broken.

But for the brief time that came before the questions, and the heartache, and the blame, Callie simply rejoiced in the fact that her wife was alive. She wrapped her hand around Arizona's delicate fingers and brought them up to her lips. "I'm so happy to see you, baby," she whispered, blinking back another sudden onset of tears.

Arizona used every ounce of strength to smile at her wife, despite the pain she was in. She had no idea what had happened, or what was going to happen in the future. But by the look on her Calliope's face, she was about to get bad news. "Just tell me already," the blonde whispered, baby blues pleading with the rich chocolate they adored.

"I love you, Arizona," Callie professed, kissing her wife's hand once more. "No matter what, please remember that. "I love you so, so much…and I can't live without you."

The End

A/N: Wow, so not only was I able to update "Surprises" this week, but Columbus Day gave me a few hours of free time to get a head start on this chapter! Yay! I kind of forgot how much I love to write until I got back in the swing. Probably helps to have this amazing SL on Grey's to use as inspiration. Loving where this season is taking our girls and want to try and keep these chapters going in the same direction, which is why I chose NOT to get into too much of what "might have" happened after AZ woke up. Kind of liked writing from Callie's internal perspective a bit here & figured Bailey would be a good person to use as her support system. LOL…once I got started on this, I just couldn't stop going so the chapter turned out to be a bit longer than I envisioned. But hey, the longer the better right? Hope you think so…and hope you enjoyed this chapter of "Little Moments." Thanks for reading & hope to hear from you all. Tired & hoping for some sleep tonight…my little one is getting molars, ughhhh!