Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy, or its characters and storylines. Those all belong to Shonda Rhimes and ABC.

Little Moments: Season 9

Fighting For Our Life (Episode 3):

Callie returned from the hospital for the second time that evening, her feet trudging slowly through the door to the place that now closely resembled Hell. Why was all of this happening? Why did life have to be so extreme? One minute, she was the happiest woman in the world…so in love with her wife and daughter, her career on the uphill climb to profound success, everything as close to perfect as imaginable. And now- now life was far from perfect. Now her best friend was dead. Her wife was disabled. She and Sofia were miserable. Work was just about the only thing Callie Torres looked forward to these days. At least at the hospital, she didn't have to see the wheelchair…or hear the bitterness in Arizona's voice…or feel the sadness when she looked into the now cold, distant baby blues she used to see her whole world in.

The brunette had tried everything she could think of to break down the strong, hard walls of anger and resentment that her wife had built over the weeks since the amputation. She had almost gotten used to being a punching bag…used to letting Arizona take out every frustration on her. She had tried to distance herself from her wife, but Arizona refused to let Callie breathe without the constant reminder of the decision she had made. If Callie was silent, Arizona found a way to provoke her, until each of them were yelling and screaming like two, young and immature lovers during a silly spat. But this was no silly spat.

Callie then tried venturing down another road towards reconciliation. She had begged Arizona to forgive her. Tried, over and over again, to explain how she had been backed into a corner…to explain to her wife that death was the only other alternative to the amputation. But Arizona refused to hear the truth, and the more Callie tried to reach her, the further Arizona ran from reality. Callie had tried to love and comfort Arizona, but the blonde consistently pushed her away. Arizona refused to let her wife in for more than a spilt second here and there, when she occasionally forgot that Callie was the enemy and simply saw her as the woman she adored.

The brunette had felt a glimmer of hope earlier that evening, when she caught Arizona looking at her as she cried in the shower. "This is my life now too," Callie had reminded her wife, after forcing her under the water.

Arizona was well aware of that fact. She was well aware that her disability was making Callie's life almost as difficult as it made her own. And she was even more aware of the mental and emotional pain she was inflicting upon the lost and lonely woman who held her heart. She didn't want to treat Callie the way she had been, but she just couldn't stop herself. Arizona Robbins couldn't stop the anger, and fear, and sorrow that coursed through her veins every waking second of every single day. She hated the hand that life had dealt her, and she needed someone to take it out on. And that person was her wife. For better or worse…Callie had promised her. And while Arizona knew that some promises had to be broken, like the one made in her hospital room, she was going to hold her wife to this one. For better or worse.

And this- this was definitely the worse. If Callie couldn't stay with her through this horribly tough time, then all of the blonde's insecurities would prove true. "She'll never look at me the same way," Arizona often heard herself saying as she looked at her now mangled self in the mirror. "She'll never want me the way she used to want me. And slowly, over time, she'll fall out of love with me. Then she'll leave…find someone whole who can make her happy the way I used to." Every fear…every doubt, slapped Arizona in the face each time her eyes met that awful reflection.

The blonde would cry for hours every morning after her girls left for the hospital. She would think about all of the things she may never get to experience with her daughter. Swimming. Hiking. Running through the park. She certainly couldn't do those things with one leg. And it could take years of training with a prosthetic to achieve full mobility.

She would think of all of the things she may never get to experience with her wife again. Racing to the daycare for lunch. Standing at an OR table together. Making love. Who wants a piece of plastic wrapped around their hips? Certainly not the goddess Arizona Robbins married. Calliope deserved better than that. She deserved more than Arizona thought she could ever give her again.

As the blonde's mind raced with all of these thoughts, the bedroom door slowly creaked open. Callie was home. Arizona wanted to pretend she was asleep, like she did most nights that her wife came home late. But tonight, she couldn't do it. She couldn't pretend.

The words that Callie had spoken in their bathroom a few hours earlier made it impossible for the blonde to continue living the way she had been. Callie was right. It wasn't just Arizona's life on the line here…it was their life, and Sofia's too.

Things wouldn't change overnight, but Arizona made a vow to try- try a little bit more and a little harder every day. She would stop fighting with the health care aides. She would go to therapy. She would get fitted for a prosthetic. Because the next time she looked- really looked, into those beautiful, brown eyes, she did not want to see what she saw in the shower that night.

"Hey," Callie whispered as she climbed into bed. She knew Arizona was not asleep, even though her back was turned. "We decided not to take the settlement…not that you really care."

The blonde stayed silent for a few moments, wondering what had happened at the meeting she had so adamantly refused to attend. Without so much as moving, Arizona sucked in a deep breath and mumbled, "Why?"

"Why what?" Callie asked, rolling to face her wife's back.

"Why did you change your mind?" Arizona replied, shrugging her shoulders. "I…I-I mean, earlier it seemed like everyone was dead set on taking the money. And, a-and so were you…"

"That was earlier," Callie stated, very matter-of-factly. "Things change."

"What things?" the blonde questioned, craning her neck just enough to catch a glimpse of Callie's face.

"You should have come with me," Callie said, unwilling to explain everything to her wife. If Arizona wanted to know what went down at the meeting, she should have been there herself. Her wife was going to have to get up and start living…or learn to trust her. Either way, Callie was not about to go into the details of why she and the others had decided to pursue the investigation.

"I can't just go out anymore," Arizona muttered, her tone laced with bitterness again. So much for trying to be better, she thought, hating herself a little more.

"I know things aren't easy," Callie yelled, rolling over so Arizona didn't see the hurt on her face. "Nothing is easy anymore. But I'm not giving up. And neither are our friends. We're going to find out why that plane went down, and make sure it never happens to anyone else. We're going to fight, Arizona. I'm going to fight…for you, whether you like it or not."

Once again, Arizona was silent on the other side of the bed. "God damn it, Arizona. Did you hear me?" Callie screamed, flipping over to meet her wife's back once more. "I said, I'm going to fight for you. Do you hear me? I'm going to fight, every single day, to make our life better. And I hope like hell that you join me, because this battle would be so much easier if you were in it with me."

And like a flood, the tears came rushing down the blonde's face. Maddening quiet filled the air and more than anything, Arizona wished that she could talk to her wife. She wished she could tell her what she was thinking…how she was feeling…how much she loved her and wanted to fight for their life too. She opened her mouth to speak, but no sound came out. Tears were all that would surface that evening.

Back to back, the two lovers cried themselves to sleep. The bed that they once shared in ecstasy, and comfort, and love was cold and lonely…just like their life. But it didn't have to stay that way. They could heal one another. They could put this all behind them. They could have their life back. All they had to do was keep on fighting. But for now, the battle was over. Darkness had prevailed once more…and it would be a long, hard journey before the dawn.

A/N: First of all, I must state the obvious- last night's episode was AMAZING! Sara and Jessica are really putting it all out there & I can't even wait for the other incredible performances we are sure to see this season! The way AZ looked at Cal at the end of the shower scene was just heartbreaking. You can tell she hates to hurt her wife, but I'm sure she feels very powerless. I cannot even imagine going thru such a loss. Because of the way things were left & the promo for next week, I didn't quite know what to do with this chapter. I know there is not much dialogue, but without knowing exactly where the SL is going, I kind of like doing the introspection from both POVs. Hope you enjoyed it, please drop a line to let me know what you thought. Have a great weekend, I know I am looking forward to it!