Sessediz

Rated M: Language and love scenes

D/S

This chapter is 100% Darien so I'll apologize in advance to those who wanted to hear from Serena but I promise we'll see more of her POV in the next chapter. I also haven't responded too much to individual reviews so I am making a point to with the responses to the last chapter.

SMSM92: You should have seen the first few drafts (very corny, much to my dismay). I kept deleting what I had written until I just had to walk away from this story for a couple of days. Then one day I heard someone listening to the song in WalMart and everything weirdly clicked out of nowhere; then voila! And thank you for your comments on how Serena received the information from Jed; I wanted a bit of a refreshing take on this kind of situation and so far it has played out well.

Bky: Thank you so much! I love hearing that my readers think of this story when that song comes on the radio/music apps. When I hear the song I imagine a head-cannon music video with clips from the anime.

Guest4: Thanks! It makes me happy that others are happy when I click the 'submit' button. Please do let me know what you think of this new chapter. Definitely a few chapters left in this one and I'm not sure which SM stories you are currently following but I should have updates for Do More Than Just Exist and Outside the Walls soon!

Also thank you to Guest1, Guest2 (who I believe was also SMSM92), TePPy and Guest3 for taking the time to review! I love hearing from everyone :)

Darien Shields:

I woke up early the next morning, well not early but earlier than Serena, and snuck downstairs in my robe to whip us up a breakfast. Once the bacon was started, I cracked six eggs and whisked them evenly, adding in some seasonings and a bit of water.

"Whatcha making?" Serena bounced into view wearing my black shirt from last night with her lacy panties. I wonder when Andrew's getting up.

"Uh, ham and cheese omelette with bacon. I hope that's okay," I smiled.

Serena sat on a stood and poured herself a mug of coffee, "Yep. I'm starved." She practically downed the hot drink and I stared at her in amazement, "What?"

"Nothing," I went back to the stove to pour the egg mixture in a tall skillet, "I thought you would still be putting half a jar of sugar in your coffee."

"I'm not the same girl from high school, Darien."

I turned on the burner and walked over to her, "I know that. I want to get to know this new woman before me."

Serena grinned, "Good."

"Darien," Ami peered from the steps. My face turned white, "Andrew wants to know when he can come down." I looked to Serena who shrugged. Nuh-uh, as far as I'm concerned, you're mine now. No one else gets to see you without proper clothing.

"Just a sec!" I went over to the couch for the checkered fleece blanket and wrapped it around Serena who gave me a sideways glance. "Please," I whispered.

Serena nodded and I informed Ami that we were squared away now. Shortly after, both of them came downstairs as I added the filler to the omelette and flipped the bacon slices.

"Ham and cheese!" Andrew opened the cabinet to pull out a packet of tea. "My favorite," he wiggled his eyebrows.

"Not for yo—," I began to say.

"I'm sure there's plenty to share," Serena jumped in.

"Good," Andrew replied, taking the only other seat next to Serena. Ami sat in the other one and was flipping through a magazine. "So, what brings you here so early?" Serena blushed.

"Guys, really," I pleaded.

Ami looked up, "He's just teasing, Darien. I trust you two worked out your problems." Serena and I looked to each other and then to opposite walls. "Wait, you didn't?"

Serena grabbed the coffee pot again, "We will. That's the plan for today." I bobbed my head before hearing the bacon sizzle louder. I stabbed each piece with a fork and placed them on a paper towel-covered plate to help soak up some of the excess grease.

"Who's hungry," I asked, placing the plate on the island to start breakfast.

Everyone began chewing on the bacon and I noticed a subtle look on Serena's face. Maybe she's more of a crunchy bacon person. Once the omelette was finished I dished it out onto four plates and we all ate with conversation focusing on Serena's restaurant and her move to an apartment across the park.

"When is the apartment yours," Ami asked between bites.

Serena swallowed, "Friday. We hired a moving company but it'll take all day and the weekend to get everything settled. Since we now have two sous chefs and two managers, we are giving them the weekend to handle the restaurant as a final test before the move."

"That's a lot of people," Andrew commented.

"Well it's a much bigger restaurant. I'm just glad we had enough money to hire that many before the new location opens. Lita wants another sous chef but we'll have to wait until the first quarter report comes in."

I listened to Serena and watched as she scraped the leftover cheese from her plate. Sexy, smart and organized.

"Opening night is booked but you two should definitely check it out. I decided to extend more responsibilities to the party planner, as per Darien's suggestion, which has taken a lot of work off my shoulders," she smiled over at me. "Have to spend money to make money. I wonder who all she's added to the guest list."

Her mentioning of the party planner gave me an idea and I wondered if the name of the company she was using was listed on the Moon Rise files at the office.

Ami and Andrew went back upstairs to get ready for the day while Serena and I did the same. When I saw her discarded dress on the ground I turned to her, "Do you want me to try and get an outfit from Ami? Or I can call ahead for a cab? I don't want you feeling weird."

Serena laughed, "What? A walk of shame?"

"Not shame, I mean, I hope that's not how you view last night."

Serena walked up to me and propped herself up on her toes, her lips meeting mine. I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her to me. My fingers trailed to the edge of my shirt on her and she stepped back.

"Not an ounce of shame. Now, come on, we need to shower."

I watched as she made a B-line for my personal bathroom, discarding her little amount of clothing. Quickly, I undid the robe and slid off my boxers. When I arrived at the door, the shower was already turned on, the glass door foggy and steam emitting from the tub.

"Serena?" I grinned. Suddenly, her breasts were pressed up to the glass, wiping away some of the fog. Damn. I walked up to the door and slid it open to reveal a beautifully naked and wet Serena with her long blonde hair sticking to her chest, shoulders, face and back. "Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?" I leaned down to kiss her but she stepped back towards the shower head and began washing her hair.

"So, what's this about a slew of woman you've bedded?"

I crossed my arms, "And the men you've done the same to?"

Serena handed me the bottle of Head & Shoulders, "I hate my friends."

"As do I." She eyed me; presumably waiting for me to clarify that I meant my friends and not hers. "Oh, Jed's a colleague, not friend. With how involved your friends are in your love life, I almost want to say that I never want to see them again… while still getting to see you, of course." The statement was true but I feared her response given that they were her friends.

"I understand. They'll definitely be hearing from me about this."

"Well," I stepped forward, "I'd prefer to keep this," I motioned from her to me, "between us." I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled our bodies together as quickly as I could without causing us to slip. My hands slid down easily over her wet skin and tightened over her curves.

"Darien," she moaned into my ear. I'll never tire of hearing you say my name, Serena.

Here we were again, still not talking about the issues at hand. I certainly needed to know why she left me then and now I needed to know if things really were changing between us. I knew I shouldn't be sleeping with her if I wasn't sure where we stood, since that's what caused me to break things off before, but having her here with me… her body in my arms, moving to my touch and her voice declaring her pleasure… I needed her. I needed this.

"Serena," I groaned as she trailed her fingernails down my chest and abdomen.

"Yes?" she pulled away slightly with that smug look on her face.

"I didn't say stop." Serena smiled widely as she grasped me and I thought I was going to fall to my knees right there. "Oh fu—."

"Shh," she commanded. I snapped my bottom lip up and let her continue gliding her hand over me. When she leaned in I thought she was going to whisper something to me but instead she grazed her teeth underneath my ear before sucking on my earlobe. I had to lean against the shower wall beside me to control my balance as she touched me intimately.

Though I would have wished we could have had the last six years together, this was definitely worth the wait. And it always would be, so long as I could one day really make Serena mine.

Once we were out of the shower I watched as she towel dried her long hair. The task was so simple yet I couldn't look away. Her previously smudged eye makeup was now fixed but the dark shade on the lid was still present and with her eyes closed I stood there transfixed.

"Are you staring at me?" she asked suddenly. Uh...

"What if I were? Hmm?"

She picked up her dress, "I might have to say that you ogle too much, sir." Not possible. "Cab or subway?"

"Oh, are we leaving now?"

"I should probably get changed, but we could even talk at my apartment if you'd like."

I nodded, "Sounds good. Here," I tossed her another old band tee with palm trees on it.

"Eve 6?"

I shrugged, "You can wear it over your dress." At least this way it would look like she was wearing a glittery skirt instead of last night's dress.

About an hour later we were at her apartment in Brooklyn. She and Lita had a little more packing to do this week and I offered to help with the move but she assured me that I shouldn't take the time off of work for her, especially as the boss.

"Well, when can I come visit?"

"Whenever you want. I don't know how much will be done by the end of the weekend, but so long as we've made headway then it was worth the time off from the restaurant."

I ran my hand across her bare desk, remembering the photos from before, "Why did you keep those photos of us, Sere?" I actually wanted to know why she broke up with me if she still obviously held some level of interest in me over the years. I mean, the last few weeks are their own deal but she held onto those photos through six years of moving around. Did she take them with her when she first left for L.A.?

"What else was I going to remember you by? We didn't really exchange many gifts in our time together," she paused. "I am still sorry about that."

"The tickets? Sere, don't be. I gave them to your brother to take a girl on a date."

This caught her attention, "What? He never said anything."

"I told him not to, not that you contacted your family much that year," this statement seemed to hurt her, "I didn't mean it that way, just—."

"I know." We sat there on her bed in silence. Serena reclined back on the pillows, "I suppose this is the talk now."

"Yeah."

Silence loomed over us and I wondered which of us should speak first. She had a lot of explaining to do but I couldn't imagine it would be easy for her. Maybe I should ask a question to get this going?

"I just need a moment, alright?"

I looked over my shoulder, "Hmm?"

"To talk. I haven't really given myself time over the last day to get my thoughts in order and I want to be sure this all comes out the best I can manage."

"Sure thing."

Again, silence.

I knew I needed these answers but the feeling that this was digging up an old wound for Serena crept into my mind and I started mentally hitting myself for being so demanding the night before. But could we truly look over everything and act like we were strangers only meeting each other for the first time? No. That would never work and she knew it too.

This was a conversation that we needed to have.

"Darien?" I beveled on my hips and looked at her but she continued to look at the ceiling, "Let's start out with your birthday party."

"My eighteenth?"

Serena closed her eyes and nodded, "Yes. Remember how your mother and I were inside the kitchen getting your cake ready? Well, she had some choice words to share with me back then." She moved to her side and faced me "I only shared part of that with you the day I left, or well, told you I was leaving. I didn't leave for another three days."

"What did she say?" she didn't reply right away, "Serena, I've accepted that my mother is not the nicest person and that she can be a real bitch. Just tell me."

Serena sighed deeply. "She called me, a seventeen-year-old girl, a gold digging slut after her precious son." Her blue eyes fixated on mine and I was almost uncomfortable with them for a moment, "She said that I was only with you as a spread of legs for the upcoming doctor she thought you'd be," I had a fleeting thought that I might have to share with Serena why it was that I never went to medical school, "and hearing that from an adult woman, your mother no less, would have been the least of my worries if it hadn't been partially true."

"Wh—what do you mean?" I couldn't quite believe that my own mother would use such words on a young woman but what was Serena getting at?

"Prom night, with Damon Gaines," she stated.

"The night you—."

"Yes. Damon had been nice that whole evening and afterwards he took me to that motel off the exit 252 ramp." I knew that son of a bitch took her to a dingy motel. "I didn't know what to expect but he was sweet to me. He told me that we didn't have to do anything but that he cared for me. And then I made a decision." She took a deep breath, "I convinced myself that he loved me in his own way, despite us only just getting to know each other, and I slept with him. Th-that night," I could tell this way getting harder for her to talk about, "afterwards he just told me to get dressed so that we could go to after-prom. I didn't know what to think, I mean, I just gave him something really special and he wanted to go ride carnival rides in the church parking lot."

This information was starting to anger me. Not at her, but at myself and definitely at that ass-face.

"He ran off with his friends as soon as we got there. I didn't know what to do. My friends all had their own dates and all I could think about was going home to shower and sleep it off." Serena started fidgeting with her hair and I couldn't remember her looking so unconfident in her actions since freshman homecoming when she tripped and tried so hard to dance it off. "I was walking by one of the game booths when I heard Damon and his friends talking. They were taking a smoke break and talking about a bet of some kind. Apparently, they all had some pact to bed a girl on prom night but the girls had to be virgins. Two of the other guys were successful so they were divvying up the cash."

"I can't bel—," she held up her hand.

"Please, let me get this out," I nodded, though not without strong restraint on my part. I was already mentally thinking about how to find Damon Gaines. "I was a mess after that and when you and your buds made that comment about prom night at school on Monday I thought I was going to die. You were the only guy I liked through high school and I really wished I had gone to prom with you." My heart dropped; so did I. "That day after school let out when you asked me out for milkshakes, I had been on my way to the drugstore to buy—well, to buy a test."

"He got you pregnant?" Is that why she left? She had to go have the baby? If so, where is the child now?

"He didn't. I found out later that night, but it only helped the situation a little. I was still ashamed of what happened and I really did feel like a slut. When we started hanging out, I got on the pill just in case because I didn't want another freak out." I nodded along, understanding. I had slept with a few girls by that time but I had been content with waiting for Serena to be ready. She was, after all, the girl I had been fanaticizing about all through high school. "Don't get me wrong, I wasn't planning on doing anything again so soon it's just that these things happen. But when your mother said those things to me… it brought it all back. I had dealt with years of people criticizing my work ethic, interests and my intelligence. Your mother's comments were my breaking point."

I can't believe it. "Why didn't you tell me?" I would have understood. I could have helped her.

"Because I needed this; I needed to get out of that town and prove to myself, before anyone else, that I wasn't as lazy as they all thought."

"Alright," I rubbed my temples, "so where did you go? Your parents told me you took the Carisma."

"I got halfway to Los Angeles and sold it for parts, then I hitch-hiked the rest of the way."

"You hitch-hiked to L.A.?" she nodded. "Why'd you go there?"

"I dunno. There's a lot to be said about Los Angeles, besides all the bad stuff. I got my GED and worked several jobs to save up for my next move."

"Boulder," I added.

"Yeah, in L.A. I rented an apartment above a used bookstore that an elderly couple owned. When I wasn't waitressing, I helped them get their business back on the map by making their store a Facebook page and marketing through it. While doing that I found out that my manager was having a similar issue with the diner so I kinda started doing that."

"Marketing?" It was a pretty good field to be getting into and thinking of it now, Serena seemed to be a perfect fit for it.

"Yep. I had to move though; the neighborhood was really bad and a couple of guys kept trying to hassle me on my walk from the apartment to the diner." Hearing all this made my heart ache. Serena had dealt with her own hardships while I was just sitting around miserable that she left me.

"I'm sorry to interject but can you clarify something for me? Did you leave Tucson and my mother," weird, "and everything else but—but not me?"

"I don't understand the question, Darien."

I sighed, "Did you want to break up with me back then? Di—did you still like me?"

"Like you? Yes. Love you? I never let myself dwell on it." I gave her a confused look at that statement, I'm sure. "I'm not trying to hurt you, I just couldn't let myself think about it or I would have likely come home with my tail between my legs. I just—I just needed to leave, alright? I'm sorry that everything went the way it went. We just got started at a weird time in my life."

"I guess I can understand that." But you leaving me like that affected me in ways I can't begin to tell you, Serena. "I don't think you're a slut, Serena. If I thought that I'd have to say that same thing to myself."

Serena sat up and pulled her legs to her chest, "I think our generation has a different way of looking at relationships. In hindsight, and ignoring Damon Gaines," I wish I could, "I honestly don't think that I felt too pressured to be sexually active in high school. Aside from mild teasing, everyone was free to do as they pleased."

"How do you figure? I thought you said part of why you left was because of what my mother said to you?"

"That she was, but I was only seventeen; sixteen at the time it happened. I couldn't see the situation clearly then but once I did I felt free in my choice to sleep with whomever I found a mutual interest in."

I nodded, understanding her statement as something I had adopted myself.

"Thing is, even though I'm not ashamed of my past anymore, that first time is still there in my mind. I sometimes find myself thinking about the situation and criticizing myself for the stupid decision I made at the time. Maybe if I hadn't of slept with Damon I would have stayed and we could have been together for our senior year."

It took a lot of courage for me to voice my thoughts on her declaration but somehow I mustered it up. "Serena, you shouldn't waste time thinking about how you could change the past. Who knows how things would have turned out? Haven't you ever heard about the ripple effect? You might not have the friends you have now, the experiences, the confidence you've gained from it all and not to mention the spectacular restaurant you're opening in just a few weeks." She smiled at that. "Seeing what you have now, would you be willing to bet all of this for a simple chance that we would have stayed together our senior year?"

She furrowed her brow, "What do you mean?"

I leaned closer to her, "You aren't the only one who's changed, Serena. Do you think I'm the same guy I was six years ago?" She shook her head. "Exactly, I was still in high school. Who knows if we would have made it back then? But I'm here now; a twenty-four-year-old man building up his own business in New York. We both had an effect on who we are today." I didn't add in the fact that as adults we could make really make this relationship work. One thing at a time.

"That reminds me," shit, here it comes, "why didn't you go to medical school? And why are you running a consultation firm?"

"Um," I tried to stall for a moment. "Well, that's a story for another time, I think."

"No," she grabbed my arm tightly, "tell me." Serena wasn't asking and I knew that there was no easy way out of this one.

"Alright, but please hear me out." Serena nodded and I hoped the small gesture carried more weight than it seemed to give. "Do you remember that day in the park? You told me something that day that I couldn't get out of my mind all of my senior year."

Serena's eye widened and I saw a pang of hurt. "You mean about how terrible of a doctor I said you would be?" I bobbed my head. "Oh, Darien, I—I didn't mean a word of that! I only said that because you wouldn't stop following me." Wait, what? "I admit I was trying to hurt you but only so that I could get some time to get my stuff packed." At those words I felt a heavy weight being lifted off my shoulders with the sudden crash of it all coming back down. "You—you gave up your dream over what I said?"

I—I did… My breathing caught and I struggled to concentrate clearly. I gave it all up and—and for what? After she said those horrible things to me I felt psychologically ambushed. No longer did I hold a confidence in my career path and the fear that I would turn out to be as bad as I had thought she honestly felt at the time… it was too much.

"Darien," she trailed off and lifted a hand to my face, "Hey, hey."

Tears were beginning to well up in my eyes and I tried to fight it off. Not in front of Serena. Not now.

"Shh," she whispered, pulling me to her warm chest. "I know you might not want to hear this right now but I'm not sure when would be the best time." I waited for her to continue, "Darien, you finished your degree here in New York before starting your own business; a seemingly successful one at that. Would you be willing to give that up?"

"I—I don't know," I managed to say. I know I had just told Serena a similar thing but I had worked my entire life to be a doctor. It was something I had finally come to terms with so to hear that I had made a foolish decision based on such a trivial comment… I can't believe this.

Serena didn't bother to continue talking. She just held me and we stayed there silent. I glanced at the clock after a while and realized that I must've fallen asleep. I felt Serena's body underneath mine and found that she was also asleep.

It was nearly 4 p.m. and I knew that I needed to start heading back.

"Hey," I whispered. Serena stirred and opened her eyes.

"Hey."

"I'm sorry but I should be getting home."

Serena sat up to face me, "What, now?"

"Yeah." I didn't have anything more to say and I wasn't sure if my reluctance to stay would reflect poorly on what we had hoped to accomplish by talking but I needed time to think.

"Darien—."

"No," I put my hands up in front of me and she jolted back. "I—I'm sorry but I need time to think. Not too much, just—just the week. Can I have that?"

Serena nodded, "Do whatever you need to. I'll be here."

I forced a quick smile and stood up to leave but paused first, "Good luck with the move. Don't hesitate to call me if you need anything. After all, we're practically neighbors now."

"Goodbye, Darien."

A/N: Pleeease don't hate me. I'm building the story up and there's just a few more blocks. Thank you all for your patience with me and our favorite love birds!

There were 6-7 reviews on the last chapter so let's try for 8 this time around (it is chapter 8, after all).

Sessediz