Many thanks to my reviewers. You encourage me!
This chapter will be a little longer than the previous two.
I don't own Voltron, ecc. ecc.
The evening before – part two
It was 11 pm, and, as usual, the boys, one after the other, had begun to leave the rec room. Hunk was going to be on night shifts, and that would have kept him busy until 2 am, while Pidge took leave saying that he absolutely wanted to complete his latest software for the security system of the castle before the following morning. Lance and Keith, instead, were engaged in a game of chess for about half-an hour, and they were essentially in a tie. Allura enjoyed very much watching her friends facing one another in a competition of any kind, because every time it was like they were about to deal with a feat of vital importance, like their very survival would depend on it. It was incredible how they couldn't carve out for themselves even a moment of levity... especially in those situations that involved a head-to-head! Lance kept his elbows leant on his legs, his facial expression clearly focused. Keith, as usual, had gone into his warrior mode and played against his opponent using the psychology: with his body erect and comfortably rested against the back of his chair, he looked at Lance without showing any personal emotions. And Lance was obviously annoyed.
Allura had always been struck by Keith's ability to handle any situation with extreme calm and rationality. And this was particularly evident and effective on the battlefield. It was this talent that had earned him, at the very young age of 20 years, the rank of Captain. Allura couldn't imagine a single person who deserved it more than him: Keith was a born leader, although maybe he himself didn't thoroughly realize it; he possessed by nature that charisma that many men, including some of the rulers she had met, would have never achieve even in many years of study and practice. This too was part of the long list of qualities that attracted her to him.
The next move was to Lance. After a few minutes of consideration he decided to move the rook. Keith couldn't restrain a slight smile of satisfaction: it was precisely the move that he hoped he would do! With a flick he moved his white bishop in line with the opponent's king: "Checkmate." There was no way out for the king of Lance: every move would have been fatal to him.
"No! It is not possible! How can you always win this game, without me even realizing it? ".
Allura chuckled a little.
"Well, it is assumed that this is a game of strategy... and strategy, my dear Lance, definitely has always been my favorite subject!" Keith replied.
A baffled Lance cast a glance on the board and on the pieces removed that laid off the ground: among the blacks there were three pawns, one bishop and one knight, and among the whites three pawns, one knight and two rooks. "Look! More than half of our armies are still on the chessboard! How can you call this a battle? "
"By now you should have learned that in chess, it doesn't matter how many opponents you take out, but how you may be able to reach the goal first..." And with that Keith turned to Allura and winked at her.
Keith was just like that, even in real battles: he always tried to make the most of every situation, defeating the enemy aiming at his very heart and sacrificing the smallest number of people involved, even if opponents.
"Enough! After this, it's time for me to go to bed." Having stretched his arms vigorously, Lance stood up and went to the door without further delay. But before leaving he turned back toward them: "And you two, you'd better behave!" Having said that, he wished them goodbye with a nonchalant wave of his hand and a wink. Allura couldn't help but blush with the innuendo hidden behind those words, but decided to play dumb and, according to her own naivety, turned to Keith and asked him: "What do you think he meant by that?". Keith only shrugged and shook his head with resignation.
Both were obviously aware that those evenings they spent only in each other company could easily lead to gossip, but seeing that nothing improper really happened between them, they tacitly agreed to not worry about it. Their conscience was clear, why bother about others' thinking? Besides, the rec room, like many other rooms inside the castle, was under video surveillance. Anyone could have reviewed the records to check what happened there, and their friends had definitely already done so - they had no doubt about that.
Both Keith and Allura were also aware that their meetings weren't exactly "normal" friend dates. The whole situation that allowed them to remain alone was not exactly "normal". For one thing, Allura didn't spend so much time alone with any of the other guys of the team. And then there was this "strange" ritual, so that were their very friends to ensure that they remained alone. Third, neither Keith nor Allura had never tried to avoid that situation - which could have been easily misunderstood - retiring early before the others. If anything, they came to wait for that unspoken date with trepidation. It had become their occasion to talk about their impressions about the day, discuss some important decision that Allura should have taken the following days, review together the battles and comfort each other for the pain they had caused. Yes, they both knew that their meetings were not just friend dates, and that their teammates gave them those moments so they could find the way and time to admit it to each other... but, until then, both preferred to remain gingerly beyond that invisible line that they had drawn to defend their hearts from that feeling they were still trying hard to understand and control.
Once left to themselves, Keith went to take his usual place beside her on the couch. Allura, meanwhile, had poured herself and his companion a cup of a particularly valuable green tea shipped directly from Earth - given the fact that that type of plant didn't grow on her planet.
"So, how are the preparations for the meeting with the planet Lyra's diplomats going? Coran told me that he wants you to be particularly prepared for that occasion. Actually, it's an unique opportunity to form a very strategic alliance..." he asked, genuinely interested.
"I have to say that I don't feel yet ready... but I still have a month to play around with: even if I'll have to alternate the study with lion practice and with the ordinary administration of my country, I think I can do it" she replied, giving him one of her most radiant smiles. Keith quickly averted his gaze, concentrating on sipping his own cup of tea, and continued: "Too bad the king of planet Lyra has only one daughter and no male heir. It would have been much more easy gaining his favors... and maybe the prince could have also become the proper suitor that everybody is waiting for..."
At those words Allura was on the point of hitting the ceiling. She was about to give him her usual huffy answer, but then she restrain herself, having seen the smug expression on his captain's face, and the light rippling of his lip that couldn't hide the smile and the teasing sparkle lying in his eyes: Keith was making fun of her and she was about to swallow the bait. Annoyed, and yet amused, Allura threw herself against his arm and began to innocently shower him with punches: "You... How dare you to mock me? Come on! On a subject like that?". It was no secret Allura's declared aversion to the idea of being forced to marry for political interests.
Keith hardly managed to hold the tea-cup that was slipping from his hands, and couldn't help but burst into laughter: "Watch it! Do you want me to get burnt?". Then, seeing the pout forming on her face, he continued: "Come on, forgive me, I was just joking. You know... I would be the first to stand out against it, if you eventually decided to get married for the wrong reason..."And with those words, Keith glanced at her with one of his softer looks.
Well, were looks like that that disintegrated all her resentments. Allura felt like her body was about to melt under the stare of those eyes and that only her heart remained intact, although it seemed to her that it started to beat with a rhythm of its own that didn't fit neither with her breathing, nor with the other functions of her body. Trying to hide her confusion, Allura gathered her breath enough to answer: "I forgive you." Then she quickly averted her eyes and directed them away.
Keith continued: "Going back to serious matters: I'd like you to tell me if you need more time to study. I could exempt you from some of the practices, or give you a hand with some of your paperwork".
"Well, thank you… but as for skipping lion practice, it's completely out of the question. In spite of the alarm clock going off at 6 am, you know I would never give up my daily flight with the Blue lion: it's one of the few moments of true freedom that it's accorded to me. Besides, what would the others think? That you reserve me a special treatment?". This time it was Keith's turn to slightly blush. Allura pretended not to notice and continued: "As for your second offer, on the other hand... I might take it into account. In certain matters, you come off even better than me!".
"A deal, then. If you need something, there for the asking!".
Both ended in silence their cup of tea.
"Ah, Keith, I almost forgot... I wanted to show you something...". Allura pulled out from under the couch a massive box. "You know... Next week it will be one year since I officially joined the team. You may think it's a silly thing, but I wanted to throw a small party of sorts. Nothing formal, only a toast with the four of you to thank you: join the Voltron Force was one of the most significant events of my life. For the first time I felt part of something that I chose, and that no one else arranged for me. I don't know if you can understand me, but it would be very important for me to celebrate that moment". Keith stared at her for a long time before answering: "On the contrary, I completely understand you, and I think the party would be a great idea. But what is the box you have there? "
Allura had almost forgotten why she had introduced that topic in the first place: "Ah, yes. This is what I wanted to ask you... You see, the fact is that I'm doing this... how you might call it? Oh, that's it... a yearbook! It's a kind of photo album, where I collected some of the most important images of the past year, about Voltron and the Voltron Force. I'd like it to be a kind of gift for the team, but also a document to leave with posterity, for they to always remember who the members of this team were. I realized, in fact, that there are very few pictures of the former pilots of the lions in the castle, so much so that few people still remember them. I don't want that to happen to you too... to us..." Keith's eyes lit up: "You know it's a fantastic idea? Let me see, I'm curious to flip through it".
Allura handed him the box she had kept leaning on her lap. Keith lifted the lid and took out the album. The cover of the volume was made of a thick brown leather, very smooth to the touch, and on the front it displayed, mounted, a metal enameled plaque representing the heraldic crest of the royal house (the same shield that was emblazoned across the chest of Voltron), colored with gold, and with each lion's color: black, red, blue, green and yellow. While Keith leafed through the pages of the album, Allura explained him the logic she had followed in the making: "See, here, in the first pages, I wanted to put some photos of the team members, along with some biographical information. Of course there's Sven too..." Keith briefly stopped to cast a smile in her direction.
"Then here there's the part about Voltron and some of its deeds. I imagined this section as a kind of war reportage. I inserted the pictures that for me represented the most interesting material, also as historical document for future generations. There are many pictures of the team as whole as well". Keith flipped interested through the many pages that related to that section. At that point Allura held him back just a moment, and called his attention to herself. There was some sort of agitation in the words she uttered right after: "The last two sections are the ones I care the most... For these I needed the help of the guys... and I'd like you to help me to complete them". Keith was surprised and intrigued by her request, but even more by the slightly agitated tone the princess had spoken with. He gave her a half smile: "If I can help you, I'll do it gladly. What is it? ". Allura sighed: somehow she knew it would not be easy to get what she wanted. "See, I titled the last two sections "The Voltron Force yesterday" and "The Voltron Force tomorrow". I will leave the last part blank for now. I'd like to complete it in the future, maybe in a few years, so that we'll be able to see and let the others see what we would become. As for the other section... to compile it I asked everyone if they could give me some photos of their past, of their childhood and of the years of the Academy. They were all very nice... Lance gave me a lot of photos of the others, as well as his. Here there's one of him with his family: it's very beautiful, isn't it?" She glanced at him, then continued: "And I... I was wondering if you, too... had any".
Well, she had made it: Allura had found the nerve to ask Keith to give her a concrete memento of his past. She knew perfectly well, as the whole team for the matter, that that was the more difficult topic for him to deal with. Usually Keith didn't like talking about his childhood and family. Allura could understand him: his past's memories were very painful and she had discovered them with difficulty in their evening chats.
Keith had lost his mother, who died of cancer, when he was only ten years old; he also had a brother, five years younger, whom he held dear... but he had died too, in a car accident, five years after the mother; his father, who was a taciturn and gloomy man, had never really got through the passing of his beloved wife, and after his younger son's death had confined himself in his grief, completely cutting Keith out of his life. Although they were both officers of the Galaxy Garrison, father and son never spoke to each other. Since the death of his brother, Keith's life had just gone ahead, with the only support of his Academy fellows' friendship.
Despite what she had known about him, Keith had never really TALKED about his family, about the feelings he had felt for them and about what he felt now. Allura had the feeling that Keith had never really come to terms with his past and his grief, and this worried her: there's nothing worse than living with ghosts, if ghosts don't help you to overcome the pain, like it had happened to her, that had succeeded in part thanks to the presence of his father's spirit. Allura too had had her fair share of suffering to deal with and to overcome, and for this, and also for the feeling she had for Keith, she felt herself justified in provoking him on that subject and in giving him a hand to really, and once and for all, go forward.
Keith's face darkened suddenly, like it happens when the clouds unexpectedly obscure the sun, right in the middle of an afternoon that had been, until then, bright. Allura predicted that reaction, but tried to soothe him: "Keith, relax... I didn't ask you to tell me anything. I'd like to just be able to complete this yearbook showing who we were. If you don't want to put pictures of your family in the album, some photos of you would be more than sufficient. Look, I'll show you the ones given me by the others..." Keith raised no smiles nor showed sign of comfort, but did nothing to stop Allura, who between his hands continued to leaf through the album. Under his eyes he saw some pictures of Hunk's large family: Hunk had four male brothers, and in all the pictures he was portrayed in their company; then there were Pidge's own photos, where he posed in his mother and in his brother Chip' company: these had been almost certainly taken on planet Balto. There were also many photographs of Allura with her parents, or with Nanny and Coran: in all the pictures she appeared happy and smiling, and even if in those snapshots she could have not been more than eight years old, Keith couldn't help but notice the incredible beauty that shone from her face.
Then came several pictures that were certainly part of Lance's memories: in fact there were portraits of him with his family, as well as many pictures of the Academy's years. In most of these Lance was accompanied by his inseparable friends: Sven and Keith himself. Remembering when and where those photos had been taken, Keith couldn't help but smile. Allura immediately noticed and rejoiced in: maybe that feat would have been easier now... So she eagerly flipped another page of the album: on the left page stood out a single picture, depicting a boy approximately of ten, with long and unruly black hair and dark eyes. Allura stopped in front of this pictures, staring at it with a smile: "Here's my favorite picture of all. Lance gave it to me: I don't know how he got it, but then... you were friends since childhood! Oh Keith, you're so cute in this picture! You were truly a beautiful child, and..." Before she could finish her sentence, Allura looked up at Keith, and her words hung over, because she didn't like at all what she saw. Keith's face had hardened again, but this time his eyes had a sparkle that communicated anger and deep discomfort. That was the kind of look that Keith usually reserved only to his enemies. Without saying a word Keith took the photo of the boy away from the album and began to fix it.
"Keith, why have you taken it?" she asked. But he didn't answer: he was still and cold like a stone.
Allura felt completely bewildered by his reaction. She wanted to say something, but she couldn't find the words: she felt that something was happening that she would've never expected and she didn't know why. Moreover, she felt her heart in her mouth: if she had spoken, she probably would have burst into tears. Why was Keith reacting so badly for that photo? Bracing up herself, and forcing herself to hold back the tears, Allura dared to gently lay her hand on his shoulder: "If I had known that a picture of you as a child would have upset you so much, I assure you that I would've never put it in the album. But, why... ". Keith suddenly stood up, thus freeing himself from the touch of her hand, that Allura reluctantly withdrew on her lap. Then he went to the window, the picture always held tight in his hand. Without turning towards her and keeping staring into space, with the coldest tone she had ever heard coming out of his lips, he said: "This is not me... he's my brother Ethan. Lance should be more careful when he hands his stuff out... and you... you should not interfere in things that are not a concern of yours".
Allura couldn't believe her ears: since they first met, he had never spoken to her with such harsh and distant words. Without saying a word, Allura stood up and walked out of the rec room, leaving behind the album open on the table. She was upset and she felt that the tears were about to run down from her eyes… but she wouldn't allow Keith to see them: that evening he had hurt her enough.
Things that are not a concern of mine... I thought we had already gone through that stage... I thought we had learned to share everything. At least with me, I thought you felt free to open up your heart. Evidently I was wrong.
Keith, with the corner of the eye, saw her leave, but did nothing to stop her. When he heard the door close behind him, he released the breath he was long since holding and leaned his head against the glass: "A fool... I was a complete fool. Can you ever forgive me?" But nobody was there to listen to his words, which got lost in the air. That evening he had let his pride and stubbornness prevail on what he felt for her... but he was already deeply sorry for this. The question that now he was asking himself was: would he be able to make up for that mistake?
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I hope you enjoyed this chapter… I fear you'll have to wait a while for the next one. I have yet to translate it! ;)