Stand in the Rain
Shadow of an Echo
A/N This is both late, and not really my best work. My writing muse has been fighting for survival. I had a complete mental breakdown including tears and fetal position two weeks ago and still not really back to feeling good. I'm trying though so I really hope you enjoy this and I want to thank all of you for the time you devote to my stories; it is appreciated.
Chapter Twenty-Three
All I Really Want
As much as Ichigo just wanted to kidnap Jyuushiro and spend some quality time with him and Shunsui, there was important business that needed to be seen to first, namely going with Shinji to begin repairing some of the shattered trust of the Fifth Squad members.
Even the normally hyperactive Shinji was calm and solemn as the wary Soul Reapers gathered in the training yard, lining up in neat ranks; the strongest were in the front closest to Ichigo and Shinji.
The former captain drew himself up to his full height, and was the first to address them, "I want to let you know right away that we understand you've been through hell in the last few months. This decision to join you was not made out of any desire to add to that, if anything I'd like to give you guys a break. I was once the Captain of this squad and I still hold that title in regard. Allow me to do my job again and I promise to get revenge for the suffering you have endured." Even Ichigo had never heard the other Visored speaking so seriously. This was his home, and he had been forced to leave it in the hands of the treacherous Aizen, something he was likely to never forgive himself for.
"What makes you any different from Aizen?" An older man snapped, judging by his position in the group he was a seated officer.
"I'm not." Shinji admitted outright. "That is what we need to remember. I am not any different from him because none of us are. He was one of us, lived here every day, knew all the rules and methods. If we forget that he is going to win. We treat him like he is this unknown enemy when in reality we should know him just as well as we know ourselves if we admit reality."
"There is no way in Hell I am anything like that monster!" The same man yelled.
"Oh really?" Shinji challenged. "Because that rage you are feeling against me is the same emotion he feels towards the Soul Society. We all feel anger, hatred, jealousy, and pride; Aizen is all of those. Quit putting him on a pedestal; that is exactly what he wants. The more we try to separate ourselves from him the better off he is, we won't be able to fight him at full strength."
The man was going to interrupt again when a younger Shinigami stuck her arm out to hold him back, "I think the question we need to ask is why did you come back in the first place? I wasn't here while you were Captain but I do know the story, we all do, so explain that one to me?" She demanded.
"I'm back because if we are going to beat Aizen we have to fight together," Shinji reminded. "Keep in mind he ruined my life and took all I had away from me, just because I admit to being like him does not mean I am going to let him win; if anything it just makes me want to fight harder. His hatred of the soul society is nothing compared to the loathing I have towards him." His face softened then, and Ichigo took over in order to say the necessary things that Shinji couldn't put to words.
"We don't expect you to trust us any time soon," He reassured. "We are not going to repeat Aizen's mistakes. Neither Shinji nor I will ask you to do anything you do not want to do, or participate in a way that you disapprove of. I ask that you give us a chance to show that we are worthy of your faith, just a chance, let us earn it." Ichigo was a quick learner when it came to motivational speaking, it was swiftly becoming a well-honed skill of his.
She nodded slowly, "Very well, I'll give you one chance. I am the Third seat Rin Aida."
The grumpy man beside her spoke again, "I don't like this, but I guess we don't have much of a choice. I'm the Fourth seat Makoto Aki."
From there the other seven officers introduced themselves, with varying levels of acceptance, but it was honestly better than Ichigo had dared hope for. Shinji and him made a good team when they needed to.
Questions continued late into the afternoon, mostly rehashing the plans already made before arriving. The Squads had been kept more in the dark than Ichigo had expected. Unfortunately, not really a surprise, more a disappointment. How in the heck did the head-captain believe he would motivate these shell-shocked warriors into fighting again if he wasn't giving them even a shred of useful information?
Meanwhile there was a stare down going on in the Thirteenth barracks. Jyuushiro had Grimmjow pinned in place with a sharp gaze. "I don't know how much you have been told about me." He started calmly. "But if you believe for one second that I will allow harm to come to my squad for any reason you are sorely mistaken. I took you in because Ichigo believes in you, should you betray that trust there will be nothing left of you for Yamamoto to exile."
"I left that hell hole by choice," Grimmjow growled. "I stuck my neck out for him and all of you. Betraying that would just be stupid and not worth my time. I like to fight, and I want to fight Aizen, is there anything else you need to know?" He demanded.
"Actually yes, there is." Jyuushiro's gift was the ability to remain calm even when being challenged, it's what made him such a good negotiator. "I have heard from Ichigo the reason you gave him for freeing him, but I want to hear it from you. Why did you help him escape?"
"Because I wanted to." Grimmjow replied flippantly. "I don't have a real reason other than getting him out would piss off Aizen, and of course now Kurosaki owes me."
"That's really all there is?" Jyuushiro probed, he had spent far too many years as a trainer of young Shinigami to get thrown off by bravado.
"Yeah, that's about it." Grimmjow kept using the same tone, one with a near utter lack of seriousness.
Jyuushiro's dark green eyes narrowed, "Why don't I believe you?" Anyone else might have missed the almost involuntary twitch that shook Grimmjow's shoulders.
"Why would I lie?" Grimmjow defended himself. "I have no reason to when you Shinigami have me cornered."
"I have known a few wild beasts in my time," Jyuushiro started conversationally. "When they're cornered is often when they fight the hardest, and in your case I highly doubt you are above lying. You've even managed to lie to Aizen so is it really a surprise I have my doubts?"
Grimmjow fell silent, there wasn't a whole lot he could argue about with that, well okay there was one. "Arrancar are not beasts, we can still think for ourselves."
"So that's what it is," There was triumph in Jyuushiro's voice now while there was nothing but confusion on Grimmjow. "You freed him because you couldn't stand to see Ichigo being treated like an animal; even more than Aizen or Soul Society has done to you. It was about pride." The Espada's sudden complete silence proved the deduction.
"Why do you care!" Grimmjow growled. Jyuushiro had been right when he said wild things are prone to fighting harder when backed into a corner.
"Because it's Ichigo." Jyuushiro replied simply.
That sent up a red flag in Grimmjow's mind, "Ah, it is you, I thought so. Looks like someone here is in for a surprise."
Rapid blinking, "Surprise?"
Laughter was not something he would have expected from the Espada. "Just you wait, I want to see the fallout from this one."
"Should I be worried?" Jyuushiro was not sure how to read Grimmjow's expressions well enough yet to guess anything further.
"Probably," He admitted, "But not for the reason you think." This was kinda fun if Grimmjow was being honest with himself. He wasn't going to tell him about the baby first, but that was mainly because he wanted to see Ichigo struggling to do it himself.
Of course that did nothing but put Jyuushiro on higher alert, but he had to ignore it, if he spent too much time alone with Grimmjow he would have Sentaro and Kiyone charging to the "rescue" and while he appreciated their good intentions he wanted to avoid that for now. It would not be good for the squad to think their captain was incapable of handling his responsibilities.
Time to introduce the arrogant Arrancar to his squad, though the thought of how Rukia might react did give him pause, but unfortunately this was one occasion where he could not let the comfort of one dictate his decisions. He was able to relieve a little of his guilt after realizing it would be good for the younger Kuchiki to see Hollows as something more than monsters who went bump in the night; there were two sides to every story. Ichigo had laid the groundwork in getting her to believe that but it would take actual interaction with the ones she feared most before she could overcome her fears.
XXXXX
Ichigo was going insane with waiting. He knew it would look too suspicious if as soon as he took on his new duties he rushed off to a different squad. He would have to wait at least until dark and even then he would want a good excuse just in case he was stopped.
Shinji tried to help him come up with ideas, "I could go with you tonight, and we can start by visiting all the squads with a Visored or Arrancar in it; that way we can tell anyone who asks you are just keeping your promise to watch out for all the hybrids."
"I guess that could work," Ichigo responded, thinking it over.
"There are two problems that may come up though," Shinji warned as the plan firmed up in his mind. "I know we can get you to Jyuushiro, but to make sure the two of you don't get in trouble for leaving Grimmjow and I alone we will have to stay with you and I doubt we could sneak Shunsui in."
"Don't worry about Shunsui, he will be able to make it, both of them are good at getting where they want to be without being seen. If I do go to all the other squads it means I will see him first and can warn him that is what we are doing." Ichigo realized as he remembered the nights the three of them had managed to steal some alone time together by travelling at night. "I think you are right though in saying you and Grimmjow will have to stay with us. At least Shunsui can leave Lisa with Nanao and they shouldn't get in too much trouble."
"I know I'll stay out of the way as much as I can," Shinji promised. "I can attempt to distract Grimmjow, but I don't know how well it will work."
"Thanks for trying, I just want him to know about her, it's been so long I'm not going to be too picky on how he finds out as long as it's from me or Shunsui." Ichigo admitted.
"When would you want to start seeing the other squads?" Shinji didn't need Ichigo to tell him he was getting restless, the younger Visored was practically vibrating with nerves. At least he seemed more excited than nervous, so Shinji wasn't too worried about him stressing himself out but he would still like to see Ichigo get calmed down as soon as possible.
"We at least need to meet with the officers first, and get some kind of order set up," Ichigo decided. "We need to make sure the squad is taken care of first."
"Let's get started then," Shinji advised as he got up to go start collecting together the seated officers.
There were ten in total for the fifth squad, and after quick introductions it was time to get down to business. "Who has been in charge of you since Aizen defected?" Shinji was the one doing the talking, Ichigo had known from the start he would be the more active participant.
"Captain Hitsugaya has been assisting us, and it is my job to carry out his orders the best I can." The Third seat from earlier, Rin, responded promptly.
"Good, at least you haven't been left completely to your own devices." Shinji was truly relieved. "Now I expect things will still be similar in that our orders will come through a third party but I expect that will be Ichigo now; he has the official title authorizing him to take the role."
Ichigo had to butt in there, "I think you have noticed by now that I am going to let Shinji take charge, he knows what he is doing and I don't. If what we think is true happens than I will just be passing the messages on, he will be the one carrying them out."
The sixth one in line asked, "Is this really going to work? I mean bringing Hollows to our side, it just doesn't seem right."
Shinji's face softened, his usual grin lessening, "In all honesty I don't know. We don't have any idea how this is going to go, but we have to try. I am half-Hollow yes, so is Ichigo, and many others, but we want to fight side-by-side with you against a threat bigger than all of us. Never forget this was once my home, and it was for the seven other Visoreds with us, I have bad memories of this place, but many good ones as well. I won't give up on the good just because I've seen some of the bad."
"Thank you for being honest," The officer responded, sounding authentic. They were just sick of being lied to and then treated like children, it was nice to have someone answering their questions with raw truth.
"We meant what we said earlier," Shinji reminded, "We want you to come to trust us. We have no intention of ever lying to you, and we don't have anything to hide either. Ask your questions and we will do what we can to ease your worries." Okay so they did have one secret, but as long as no one asked about it then they didn't have to lie. Somehow Shinji believed they would be fine. Under the circumstances asking about a child would be one of the last things on a warrior's mind.
"What really happened back then?" This was the Eighth seat, "I was in the squad, but not an officer yet, none of the general members were told anything specific."
First Shinji, and then with prompting, Ichigo told their stories. Rumors had been flying about both incidents for a long time, and even more since recent events had brought them up again. It was nice to get the facts set straight for once. "Oh, and don't be shy about spreading those stories around." Shinji added once Ichigo was finished. "Again, nothing to hide. The more everyone knows about us the more comfortable people will be working with us. I would advise at least trying to understand the Arrancar as well. They come from a different world, but they are here for the same reason as myself and the other Visoreds are, give them a chance to prove themselves too."
"Might want to steer clear of the Twelfth though, Kurotsuchi is bad enough without adding in Szayel," Ichigo commented. "With Szayel, being a Hollow is not what you have to worry about, it's his hobbies."
"Do I want to know what you mean when you say hobbies?" Rin asked slowly.
"You know how Kurotsuchi has a thing with scalpels and drugs?" He got a wary nod, "Szayel likes those too. They might as well be twins when they get curious about something."
"Anything else we should know about them?" Makoto asked belligerently.
"Look, you won't run into anything from them that you haven't already seen from the Shinigami here." Ichigo responded in frustration. "Szayel is just like Kurotsuchi, Nnoitra and Grimmjow are like Kenpachi, it keeps going on like that. Not to mention the Visoreds used to be one of you so they really aren't any different."
"And you? What gives you the right to command them, and us?" Now Ichigo was sure they needed to tread very carefully around him, he was lashing out at anything he could. That kind of explosive anger was very dangerous, especially if it was unprompted by anything specific.
"The largest target is on my back," Ichigo replied with deadly calm. "You think I asked for this? I never did, I just wanted to protect what I love. If this is the way I have to act to make that happen I will do it. I already told you I am not the one commanding you, Shinji will be doing that, all I'm doing is playing the game Yamamoto set up. As for the Arrancar, I earned my place with them. I survived Aizen, and proved myself to them. They didn't give me command, I took it." He was fighting hard to keep Junichi reigned in now. His Hollow was just as angry as he himself was.
Shinji grabbed his shoulder and squeezed, "I think that's enough for today Ichigo." He soothed, before turning to the officers again. "Ichigo and I want to go check on the others, for now just keep up the duties you have been performing, if anything new comes up we will inform you."
With that he shuffled Ichigo out of the Barrack's office as soon as he could.
"Sorry," Ichigo grumbled as he tried to rein in his temper, it was a lot harder than he remembered.
"They were irritating me too," Shinji admitted, "But this time I don't think this is all you." He added on with a glance downwards.
There wasn't anyone around them at the moment that they could sense, but Ichigo still didn't want to talk about it openly, so he just nodded, thinking Shinji was probably right. He had a hot temper to start with and apparently his daughter did too. This did not bode well in raising her in his opinion. She was going to be a handful.
Once he had a better handle on his temper he made good on his word to go visit the others. As expected Hacchi was just fine, in fact he was being swarmed by starry-eyed young Shinigami wanting to hear his side of the story just like the Fifth had asked of Shinji and Ichigo. He was just so gentle and approachable he was probably the least frightening of the hybrids, with the possible exception of the childlike Lilynette.
Next they went to see Izuru and Rose, a little more apprehension was visible there, but it looked to be smoothing out well. Anyone who used to be a captain was good at regaining that respect once again as long as they played by the rules.
Both him and Izuru noticed Ichigo was a little worked up. He was calm enough now though that Shinji's explanation came across as the teasing it was meant as.
Ichigo was still happy to move on though, especially since the next stop was Retsu and Starrk. He debated with himself a moment, but realized this was too good an opportunity to pass up. "Hey, Retsu, it's been awhile since you could check on me, do you think you have time for a quick once over?"
That caught her by surprise. He attended all appointments made for him, but he almost never went to her on his own. "I don't see why not. It's been a slow day." She approved.
Ichigo noticed the knowing smirk on Starrk's face, and scowled a bit in the primera's direction before following Retsu to an exam room.
"Okay Ichigo, what's going on?" She questioned seriously once they were alone.
"Ah, well," This was a lot easier in his mind. "When you gave me that last check-up, something was hiding from you."
"What was hiding? Are you still feeling sick? You should have told me." She chastised.
He shook his head, "Not like that, when I said something, I should have said someone." He settled his hand over his daughter and looked at Retsu to see her reaction.
The look of dawning understanding crossing her face made him want to smile. "You think you're pregnant?"
"I know I am," He admitted. "I wanted you to check on her and make sure she is still alright."
"Of course, go ahead and lay down." Retsu pulled herself together and turned back to her usual professional mode.
Her hands glowed with Kido as she put them over his stomach, searching for the threads of new life. "Ah, thought so. She was too little for me to find her last time." Retsu realized with her power twinning together with the baby's. "She is certainly strong now though. I doubt you have anything to worry about health wise. Keeping her safe is going to be your top priority. I can see why you have progressed your plan so quickly knowing this."
"Yeah we wanted to get everything in place before anyone that might put her in danger found out." He agreed.
"You chose well," Retsu approved, "I don't think you have long before some people are going to start noticing her. You're lucky in that you have learned to control your spiritual pressure so on a regular basis no one will be looking too closely. Try not to lose your temper or get into a situation where you might let your power flare, if there is ever going to be a time someone notices her it will be then."
"Well, there was a little incident earlier," Ichigo confessed, explaining about the confrontation between himself and the officer.
"That's not uncommon," Retsu assured, "And right now you do have the excuse of stress to write it off as if someone does comment on you getting too volatile. Again, do everything you can to control your power, and if you do I think you can get away with deflecting attention in that way."
"So she's okay?" Ichigo trusted the others around him, but this was Retsu, there was no better healer than her.
Finally Retsu let herself smile, "Yes, she's perfect. I'm not going to ask the obvious question this brings up, because I'm pretty sure I already know, I just want you to know once you do tell her father he can come with you to any check-ups."
"Is it okay if I bring two people with me?" Ichigo asked.
"This is your baby Ichigo, it is your choice who comes with you or not, but you should limit it to as few as you can manage to keep her safe." She advised.
"Oh, I'm being careful." Ichigo assured, "More people know than you would expect I'm guessing, but they won't betray me. I wouldn't bring anyone with me that I didn't have a good excuse for being around them other than the baby."
"How many know?" That worried Retsu a bit, Ichigo was known to be reckless but she highly doubted he would let that affect his judgments regarding his daughter.
"Everyone who came with us knows. There are a few still in the Living World, but they won't give me away." He replied.
"Are you sure they won't?" Retsu couldn't help but double check.
"Positive," Ichigo insisted. "They have protected me through much worse, and I did the same for them. They won't put her in any danger."
"Good, now I doubt we can get away with long checks without someone at least getting curious, so rather than waiting to do one long check-up, I would prefer meeting you more often for less time each visit." She got back on track. "Your daughter is healthy, so it shouldn't take long to keep confirming that and make sure everything is going the way it should."
"Whatever is best for her," He allowed, "I can come around by saying I'm checking on Starrk and Lilynette."
"That will work." Retsu agreed, "Now you go take care of yourself and that baby, I take it Isshin knows?" After Ichigo's nod she continued, "Good, then he has probably been helping you with staying healthy, I can leave that in his hands then as far as what you should be eating and how much sleep to get."
"Yes, he's gone over all of that with me," Ichigo assured, "He is very protective of his granddaughter."
"I can't imagine him being anything less," Retsu admitted.
From there Ichigo rejoined Shinji and they travelled through the rest of the squads, picking up Shunsui from the Eighth as they went along, and getting a quick word in edgewise with Isshin that he had seen Retsu. One last stop to make sure Nnoitra and Kenpachi were leaving at least some of the Seireitei intact he could finally skip over the Twelfth and head to Jyuushiro.
Shinji did his best to bait Grimmjow away from the trio as they spent a long few minutes with their arms wrapped around each other, reuniting after many weeks of separation. Looking from the outside it was difficult to tell what set of limbs belonged to what person, and in reality to them it didn't matter.
Finally they were whole again.
Once they had calmed down from the euphoria brought on by seeing each other again, Shunsui carefully scanned the area around them for anyone in hearing range. They were lucky. "Sentaro and Kiyone are on rounds, we have time to tell him now Ichi." He informed practically bursting with happiness.
Jyuushiro looked between his loves with curiosity and surprise, "What's going on?"
Ichigo leaned up and kissed him softly, reaching for his hand and drawing it down to his stomach. "I'm pregnant." He had spent so long trying to decide how to tell him, and no matter how elaborate it just didn't feel right. This was much better.
This time he was expecting the tackle, and was well braced for it as he was engulfed in a spray of silver hair with lean strong arms wrapped around his shoulders. He burrowed his face into Jyuushiro's pale neck, breathing in the light scent that he couldn't put a name to, it was nothing but pure Jyuushiro.
Jyuushiro wasn't very patient with that, putting a finger under his chin and lifting his face up so he could get to his lips, kissing the life out of him.
"This is really happening?" The white-haired captain asked as he gripped onto Ichigo for dear life, finally regaining the ability to speak.
"Yes, it is," Shunsui was the one to respond, as he put an arm around each of their shoulders. He had given them some time together, but he sorely missed Jyuushiro too and couldn't stand to stay back any longer.
Both Ichigo and Jyuushiro understood, and he was more than welcome back in the circle of affection with them.
"Are you okay with this Ichigo?" Jyuushiro asked seriously, squeezing his arms in reassurance. "You have already been through so much."
"I'm terrified, but I want her," Ichigo confessed honestly, "It's a lot to take in, but I won't let anything happen to her."
"It's a girl?" Ichigo's nod was followed by another crushing hug, "I never thought I would have children of my own. Even if it was allowed my body is too weak to carry a child safely, and Shunsui can't carry one in the first place. You, Shunsui, and this little girl are everything I have ever wanted." Jyuushiro didn't stop himself from kissing Ichigo again. "I'm going to do everything I can to make sure you and her never have to be afraid of anything." He promised.
"We are going to have a lot of help with that Jyuu," Shunsui added on. "We wanted to wait for you to know, but we had to get her protected. Anyone who came with us knows, and they promised to help us protect her."
Hearing that made Jyuushiro turn to face Grimmjow, "Even the Espada?"
"Yes," Grimmjow answered for himself. "Our Primera has a soft-spot for cubs, we listen to him if we want to keep our heads attached." He tried to brush it off.
"That's only part of it though," Ichigo decided to interrupt, "At least in Grimmjow's case. He is returning the favor."
"What?" Now all Jyuushiro felt was confusion.
Grimmjow emitted a frustrated growl, "It could have been my cub okay! You would protect mine, so I protect yours, not a hard concept." He grumbled.
"It is for people not used to Hollows showing either ethics or gratitude," Shinji reminded, having followed everything just as well as Grimmjow had done.
"That's not my fault." Grimmjow argued. "I shouldn't have to explain myself every two seconds because you Shinigami think you are the kings of the pride. Hate to break it to you, but you are not the only ones who have rules you know, ours are just different."
Jyuushiro put a hand in the air in surrender, "Relax, I've spent enough time around Ichigo and Junichi to know not to jump to conclusions. I didn't ask you that because you are a Hollow, I asked because you are Grimmjow and you haven't had the best history with Ichigo."
"Well then say that next time," Grimmjow shot back, leaning his weight back against the wall and making a show of ignoring the others in the room now.
"You really are nothing but a big cat," Ichigo commented, getting a glare in response.
"So says the lizard," He mumbled, before pointedly turning his head away.
Jyuushiro tapped Shunsui on the shoulder, "Is it just me or are those two being almost friendly?"
"Not just you." Shunsui assured. "Started as soon as Grimmjow joined up with us, those two keep picking on each other, but it helps Ichigo relieve stress so none of us feel like we need to intervene unless Ichigo asks us to; which he hasn't done yet by the way."
"I'm so excited Shun, this, it's more than I could have dreamed." Jyuushiro commented looking onto their young love picking on the Espada with a gentle smile on his face. "He knows how hard this is going to be right?"
"Of course he does, I believe that's why he enjoys moments like this when he can." Shunsui observed. "We will take care of him, and many will be helping us do that, but in the end we have to trust in his strength to get through this."
"If anyone can, it's him." Jyuushiro affirmed.
"I thought so too." Shunsui agreed, pulling him close for a kiss. "I missed you too."
"And I missed you." Jyuushiro responded, kissing back. "No matter how hard this is going to be I'm glad the two of you are back."
"Glad to be back," Shunsui whispered, before kissing him again.