Thank you to Nello Orella and ILoveFowl for reviewing ~ !

Nello Orella - I guess I'll have to reply on here then! Thank you so much for your review ~ it made me happy as always!

Dublin, Ireland - Eight Months Later

The television in Fowl Manor's gym was blaring overhead, the news channel on as usual. Sweat trickled down Artemis Fowl's face as he ran on the treadmill.

Artemis was almost unrecognisable. After what had happened at the lab in Sydney, with the bald man's words still ringing in his ears - I will find you and kill you - he had been shoved, most unexpectedly, into a life or death situation. He would have to learn to defend himself, and if he ever wanted to fight crime he would have to be reasonably fit.

Yes; Artemis wanted to fight what he had used to do best: crime. His separation from Holly Short and the retirement of his old bodyguard, Butler, had left him emotionally weakened and frighteningly lonely. However, after what happened in Sydney he realised that he could still be useful after all. He could still give his life purpose. And, above all, he could forget about his loneliness.

Gone were the hollow cheeks; Artemis's face was still a little thin, a little tired-looking, but he looked healthy. His skin was a more pleasant colour, the result of jogging twenty laps around the manor a day in the sun, and his body did not look thin any longer. The only scrap of likeness to a vampire were his eyes, which still had dark lines beneath them, the result of countless sleepless nights.

Artemis had also ditched his suits, opting for a more contemporary style; plaid button-downs, sport shoes with neon laces or low-cut converse, and skinny jeans - usually black, which generally reflected his mood. He figured that if he was going to track Cobra's leader down, he might as well do it subtly.

Artemis pushed his sweaty hair out of his face, turning the treadmill off. His hair had stopped being neat a long time ago, but whether this was also to fit in or just the result of laziness was uncertain.

"...The much-anticipated international conference, the 2013 Ireland Conference, will have its members - leaders from twenty seven countries - discussing important global changes to be dealt with. One of the most significant is to be about the failing world economy and the worldwide distribution of drugs. Amongst the honoured guests is the Minister of Foreign Affairs in Sweden, Mr. Knutsen, who has graciously agreed to hold an interview with RTÉ. Mr. Knutsen!"

A middle-aged man appeared on the television screen, his brown hair greying at the sides.

"I am honoured to be here," Mr. Knutsen said. His voice was smooth, his words fluid. It was clear that he was a gifted speaker.

Artemis flicked the television off. This talk about the Ireland Conference had been going on for weeks now; there was hardly going to be any new news as of yesterday.

Walking to the kitchen, Artemis was reminded of how large and empty Fowl Manor really was. His family had moved to the countryside to start a new life; he had refused to go. And now he was alone.

Artemis grabbed a glass of water and downed it in one. He was just refilling it when the phone rang, the ringing echoing dismally.

"Hello?" he said.

"Artemis, it's Butler."

"Oh, hello, old friend," said Artemis. "Do you know, I've really been working your gym equipments. You would be glad to see that there is no longer a speck of dust on the dumbbells."

There was a rush of static as Butler laughed. "I'm glad to hear that, Artemis. I suppose you are still going to tell me that your sudden interest in an activity you previously loathed is still only to do with a sudden, mysteriously sparked interest?"

"Very mysteriously, indeed," Artemis agreed.

Butler's voice grew serious. "Are you really all right, Artemis? It must be lonely in the manor. Perhaps I should visit one day?"

"No, no, it's fine," said Artemis. "I'm actually a tad busy at the moment."

"Really."

"Most positively. I'll call you back, Butler, is that all right with you? I need to take a shower – I am sweating profusely."

There was a louder rush of static.

"One last thing, then," said Butler. "Holly emailed me."

Artemis froze, his thumb on the end call button.

"What?"

"As the genius you are, I'm going to assume you heard me the first time," Butler said calmly. "She wanted to know how you were doing."

"And?"

"And I said I didn't know, because you left before I could see you."

"I was violently ill at that accursed desert, Butler. You may be immune to Australia's burning sun, but I am not. I nearly shrivelled. I was in no state to meet up."

"Which is why I called you now, to see how you were doing. You seem all right; you still have your dry sense of humour, at any rate."

Artemis pulled away from the phone briefly and stared at it. He had humour?

"- So now I'll have to call her back and say so. She'll be stunned to hear you've been working out. Stunned being the ultimate understatement."

"Look, Butler," said Artemis. He set his glass down a little harder than he meant to, gripping the phone tightly. "Old friend. The sweat is drying on my freshly washed training shirt. I have to go."

Butler conveniently did not hear the last part. "What happened between you two?" He asked. "To be completely honest, the curiosity is gnawing at my insides."

Abandoning the glass, Artemis stuck his head under the tap and drank from the running water. Once he had resurfaced, he went to the leather couch in the first lounge and flopped onto it. He was eager to share his thoughts.

"Old friend, I'm not really very eager to share my thoughts at the moment," he said, putting his feet on the armrest. "I'm on my way to the shower – you above all should know that after a gruelling two hours in the gym, one would feel most uncomfortable."

There was a disbelieving grunt. "Just tell me, Artemis. I know you're itching to let it all out."

Artemis's fingers went slack on the phone, and he sighed. He really did so want to 'let it all out'.

"I would feel like a girl at a slumber party," he objected weakly. Butler did not answer, so he simply sighed once more. "Well, as you know, we got together two years ago after Bay and the Rebel Group was arrested.

"We got along perfectly for around four months. It was the best four months of my life, but – I won't lie – it was also one of the hardest. There were so many obstacles in our way, Butler. First, I underwent a growth spurt that left me nearly twice Holly's height. I felt like a paedophile, Butler. We couldn't even go out in public, because she was clearly a fairy, and because…well…again, the paedophile assumption people would make. We had plenty of fights, more than any normal couple – but we weren't a normal couple, and we never would be. We have a forty year gap between us, for goodness sakes. And although she loved me, Holly began to withdraw and become depressed."

"Because she loved you," said Butler. His voice was low; he was whispering without even realising it.

Artemis swallowed. "Yes, old friend. Because she loved me. And it was killing me too, it was killing both of us, because we loved each other so much. So in the end, she put her foot down."

There was silence on the other side.

"She left you?"

Artemis covered his face with a cushion, pressing down just hard enough to keep his pricking eyes clear.

"Yes," he muttered. "She left me, she didn't even say goodbye, just said that we should never see each other again, that "it's for the best", and then…she left."

"I'm so sorry, Artemis."

"Don't be. It was for the best, after all. We wouldn't have been happy."

"You're not happy now."

Artemis swung his legs down off the couch and got up, heading for the bathroom.

"Of course not. But I've discovered a little something to keep my mind busy."