Chapter 2: Leo vs. The World

Update:
Leo – Status: Now a thing with Sakura
Sakura – Status: Dimension-Hopping Shoe Saleswoman

Niles – Status: Schadenfreude Gold Medal
Elise – Status: Gotta drum fast
Hinata – Status: Musically insecure
Young Dwyer – Status: Future Pokemon Master
Selkie – Status: Technically an adult
Corrin – Status: Single, ready to mingle
Oboro – Status: Annoyed

Odin Dark – Status: Pocket change
Evil Exes #2-7 – Status: Unknown

Month: April

Leo sat in a chair outside the principal's office. He wore a nice sweater over his usual polo shirt. Next to him sat a girl from the upper class, wearing the female version of the uniform. The girl looked at him. "You're actually pretty cool, Leo."

To that, Leo smiled. "Thanks. That jerk will think twice before saying things like that."

"You don't look my age," the older student said. "What year are you?"

"Uh… Eleven. I'm only sixteen."

"Ah I see. I'm in Year Thirteen, but I just moved here. The name's Scarlet."

Name: Scarlet
Status: Yet to be suspended

"We should be friends, Leo. I have a good feeling about you."

…

Leo rested on his bed, reading a book, but a girl's voice snapped him out of it. "Hey Leo."

"Scarlet? What are you doing here?"

"Well I was talking to your sister, and she's a genius! Violin and drums?! Whoa!"

Leo shrugged. "Okay?"

…

Leo stared down at the food on his plate. He sat at the table with Elise and Corrin both across him. Another sister served everybody, and Corrin looked over to her. "Where are Dad and Xander?"

"Oh you know how excited Dad is to show Xander around his work." The other sister smiled. "Leo, Corrin tells me you've made a new friend!"

Leo glared at Corrin across the table. "Why do you know that?!"

"I can't help it, people like to tell me things!"

"Is she your giiiirlfriend?" Elise teased. Leo rolled his eyes.

"No, we just hang out sometimes. Her name's Scarlet."

"Oh yeah! I know her too!" Elise realized.

…

The bully crawled away from Leo, nose bleeding. Leo glared at him. "Next time you won't be so lucky!"

Elise ran up to Leo and hugged him. "Oh thank you, Leo! You saved me from that bully!"

"No problem, Elise."

…

"What?"

Scarlet nodded, once again standing in Leo's room. "You heard me. We should start a band! Elise told me you have a guitar, and I have one too! C'mon!"

Leo's eyes squirmed. "It's just my brother's acoustic guitar… But I guess I can see where we go from there."

…

"And that's about it," Leo summarized. He was at his current age, reading a book on the bed he had in high school. Sakura sat in a chair by his desk. "That's the story of how we started a band."

"Huh… Okay." Sakura nodded. "Wait, what about your sister and her violin?"

Leo shrugged. "I don't remember."

Sakura giggled. "I still can't believe you're dreaming about reading a book." She stood up and walked out the door. "I should be going, anyway. Almost time for work. You should probably wake up."

And he did.

"Darn it."

Immediately, the scent of bacon wafted into his nose. Niles' voice was audible. "Hey, guy! Makin' bacon!"

Leo sat up on the mattress, hand on his forehead. "Dream dating… Exciting, but a little taxing on your consciousness. It takes away from the rest you get." Niles walked over to Leo and set a plate of bacon down on his lap. "So you've met Sakura, right?"

"Yeah, Corrin introduced us while you were doing that show a few weeks ago."

"How does Corrin know her anyw-" He sighed. "I need to stop asking that. She just knows everybody."

Even you. That's right. You.

"I'm gonna issue an ultimatum, Leo," Niles warned. Leo raised his eyebrow.

"One of your famous ultimatums? This must be serious."

The man with sunglasses nodded. "Yeah. You have to break up with Selkie. Today. That, or I'll tell Sakura about her. Like, next time I see her. Just, out of the blue, first thing from my mouth. Maybe I'll add a few spicy details too. Maybe I'll tell her you're into-"

"All right, I get it!"

Niles nodded. "Finish your bacon and get to it, yeah? Other Leo and I are showing Silas the Benny Lee marathon today, and we don't need you ruining the mood."

Leo blinked. "Silas? Oh yeah… Wait, Other Leo and Silas? How are you different from me?"

"Because we're open. You're not. Break up with Selkie. And go crash at Corrin's house or something tonight."

"Ugh. You're despicable. Surprising no one."

Leo stood outside a smallish, roadside ice cream shop, talking on his phone. "Selkie? Is that you? Listen, we need to ta-"

"Hi Leo!" Leo could hear Selkie's voice both on the phone and in person. He turned around and saw Selkie standing beside another girl, a Wolfskin wearing a red Hoodie (hood up). "What's up?"

"Uh… Well… I-"

"Oh!" She gestured to the girl standing beside her. "This is my friend, Velouria!"

Name: Velouria
Status: Selkie's friend

"Hi."

"Uh, hi." Leo sighed. "Selkie, it's convenient that you're already here."

"Yeah! You come here every Saturday, right?"

Leo paused. "…How'd you know that? Uh, anyway, can… I speak to you alone?"

Velouria rolled her eyes and walked off. "Whatever. I'm going to the city dump…"

"Okay I'll call you later!" Selkie turned around and took Leo's hands in her own. "Leo! Remember how we were gonna meet my parents for dinner?"

"Um… yeah…"

"How about tonight?! You can meet my dad, he's a Kitsune too! Oh! And get this, he listens to River City Ransom after he caught me playing it! Hahaha!" Selkie laughed, holding onto Leo. "Oh man! How pathetic! Must be his midlife crisis…"

Leo cleared his throat. "Selkie… I think I should just be forward about this…"

"Yeah?"

"Ahem…" Leo took a good look at Selkie.

She was waiting for him with bated breath.

Leo shut his eyes.

"We shouldn't see each other anymore… So… yeah."

Selkie merely stood there. Her ears expressively drooped and she slowly let go of Leo. "O-oh… I see…"

"Uh… Okay. Good talk," Leo awkwardly backed away. "And, uh… good luck I guess, with… life."

He bolted.

That night, Leo sat on Hinata's couch, holding his guitar. "Elise, do you have anything going on later?"

She sat behind her drums. "Yeah, why?"

"Never mind…"

Young Dwyer sat next to Leo on the couch, staring at his 3DS. "Where's Selkie?"

"Uh, we broke up. Say, I think I learned the riff from Contest of Pride. Want to test me?" Leo proceeded to play before anyone could answer. Elise just shook her head.

"Leo…"

"Look, it's fine! Besides, I have a new girlfriend."

Hinata walked in. "Wait, what? I thought Selkie was your new girlfriend."

"He has a new, new girlfriend," Young Dwyer explained, playing his game. "…New-new…"

"Ugh… Whatever, Leo. But man, we barely scraped by that Battle of the Bands!" Hinata began to pace. "We only won because that Owen guy hit them with a fireball. I've had cheaper wins, but still! We gotta step it up if we want to get known!"

Ding-dong!

Leo stood up. "Oh, she must be here now."

"What?" Hinata stopped pacing. "Leo, we were gonna practice!"

"You'll be fine without me, Young Dwyer knows my parts. I'm meeting Sakura for coffee, then I gotta see if Corrin can let me crash on the couch." Leo opened the door. Sakura stood there, smiling.

"Hi… Leo."

"Hi. Oh." Leo opened the door further and stood back. He pointed at everyone in the house. "Sakura, these are the Rockin' Troopas. Troopas, this is Sakura."

Hinata groaned. "Stop taking Leo away from us!"

"Hi Sakura! I'm Elise!" She winked. "Let me know if you want any embarrassing stories about Leo!"

"Hmhmhm. I'll… I'll consider it."

Young Dwyer only focused on his video game.

Leo shook his head and put on his coat. "Okay, we're leaving now."

As Leo and Sakura left, they missed the big fox hiding in the bushes. It narrowed its eyes and slunk away.

"You forgot something, punk," a tough-looking man on TV said. "You can't catch that flight if you're dead."

Niles sat in the armchair, all alone. "Pffft. Still can't believe Leo thinks I'm actually watching this with Other Leo and Silas." But then his smile faded. "Wait… Why do I feel like there's something I should know? Something about… dating." He hung his head back. "Huh… Leo and Sakura… She has evil ex-boyfriends…"

He gasped and pulled out Leo's laptop. Niles went to the bookmark folder labeled 'Sites About Benny Lee – DO NOT ERASE THESE, LEO'. He then pulled up a fansite where people blog about details and rumors of Benny Lee's personal life. And there it was- right there in the section for weekly fact and rumor updates, a few months back, there was something about Benny joining some form of group based on dating a Hoshidan woman. Nothing concrete, but all Niles needed to know.

"Well… How 'bout that?" Riiiing! Riiing! "What the-" Niles pulled out his phone. "Uh, yeah?"

"Um… hi… Is this Leo's apartment?"

Niles glanced around. "…Technically."

"Can… I come over?"

Niles narrowed his eye and put on his shades. "Selkie, right? Where are you right now?"

"Oh… I'm… uh…" As she stuttered on the phone, Niles got up and went to the door. He opened it. There was indeed a Kitsune girl talking into her phone outside. "Aaah! …Is Leo there?"

"…You should go."

"THAT'S RIGHT, FEEL THE BURN!"

That deep voice roused Elise from her sleep. The young woman looked over at her clock and glared. "Aw man… Two minutes before my alarm…"

With no fanfare, Elise got out of bed and changed into her work uniform. Essentially it was her normal black jacket and skirt, but today her jacket was open, revealing the customary t-shirt of Greg's Videos employees. Elise walked out into her apartment's main room and caught her roommate lifting a dumbbell. Elise scrunched her eyes shut, still mourning the loss of her two minutes of sleep. Reluctantly, she went to grab a small breakfast from the refrigerator.

"I don't know how Effie likes mornings…"

…

Elise trudged her way down a few blocks and made it into the video store. It was a boring place inside. Quiet, gray carpets, all the movies were rather old, except for ones that did rather poorly in the box office a mere few months ago. There was an inexplicable stain on one of the wall-ceiling corners.

A grown woman with lilac hair greeted the young woman. "Good morning, Elise! And how are you today?"

Name: Camilla
Status: A morning person

"Hi Camilla. I'm," she yawned, "good."

"Elise, were you staying up late last night?"

Elise moaned. "Camillaaa! I'm not a child!"

"I know, I know," Camilla rested her elbows on the counter. "By the way, I brought a lunch for you, it's in the lounge fridge."

"Thanks!"

Thus Elise's day at work began. Before very long, Elise was left alone and Leo walked in. "Elise."

"Oh. Hey Leo! What's up?"

Leo nodded as he approached. "I'm going to need to rent some Benny Lee movies. Apparently Niles found out he's one of Sakura's evil ex-boyfriends, so we thought I should get familiar with his work. Maybe see if he has any weaknesses."

Elise laughed. "Oh, Leo! You're not allowed to rent movies anymore, remember?"

"…What?"

"You didn't know? Uh, well anyway, I've been wondering," Elise changed the subject, "how are Sakura's ex-boyfriends all evil?"

Leo shrugged. "I don't know. But come on, have you seen the guy? He looks totally evil." He narrowed his eyes. "And seriously, how did my account get banned?"

"I… might've… rented a few things. In your name. And forgot…"

Leo rested one hand on his hip, and the other on his forehead. "You realize that the only reason you have this job is because our sister is the assistant manager, right?" He looked over to the back room. "CAMILLA! ARE YOU THERE? ELISE MADE A MISTAKE!"

"Leo, don't!"

"I need those movies, Elise!"

"Can't you just… watch them online or something?"

Leo smirked. "What's this, you're driving away one of your customers in favor of an online service?"

"Leo stop!"

Krakenburg Library – Where guests learn worldbuilding lore or gameplay tips from merely one page of one book

"Thanks for showing me the library again, Corrin."

Sakura and Corrin walked through the large library together. There was nothing new about either of them, apart from the round purse strapped around Sakura. It was white and had the pink image of a blossom. Corrin nodded. "Anything for my pen pal. Besides, Leo's probably too wrapped up in his own head to help."

"He was going to show me. We talked about it… last night. But then his roommate had something to tell him."

Corrin privately glared at the mention of Leo's roommate. "Yeah, well… Whatever. So, this castle used to belong to the ancient kings of Nohr. Now it's mostly a landmark. The King lives in Macarath Palace. But the library here is still available. It's sort of like a public library now."

Sakura nodded, taking in the sights. The bookshelves practically went up to the ceiling, and several people walked about, reading various books, napping, or even messing around on the public computers.

"Back in Hoshido, the royal family hadn't changed homes. A-at least not to my knowledge." As Sakura and Corrin walked together, the shoe clerk paused. "Um… hold on." Corrin stopped and watched as Sakura managed to retrieve a bow from her small purse.

A large fox with multiple tails descended from a balcony, and Sakura aimed the bow. Magical string appeared, as did an arrow. Sakura said nothing as she fired, taking out the Kitsune before it could pounce her. She bowed deeply. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you but I knew you were coming and you kind of freak me out because you're ambushing me!"

Corrin merely blinked. "Uh… okay."

"Owww…" the fox moaned, her voice familiar to Corrin's ears. "I'll get you for this, shoe lady! When I play, I play rough!"

With that, the fox trotted away. Sakura cleared her throat and held the bow behind her back. "Sh-shall we continue?"

Corrin tilted her head. "Uh, how'd you fit that in your bag?"

Sakura looked down at her feet. "I… don't want to talk about it. If that's okay."

Corrin had no response.

Leo threatened to die of boredom as he watched one of Benny Lee's movies with Niles. This particular love story was too nonsensical for his tastes. "This is asinine. I can buy the princess's performance and the farm girl's performance. I can even buy the younger prince's performance. But they expect me to believe that the high prince looks like Benny Lee? This role clearly wasn't written for him!"

Niles shrugged, looking over some papers. "Gotta cash in on that recognition somehow. Anyway, I think I have what you need to know." He flipped to the next page. "Former wrestler, became known for appearing on the news for some reason I couldn't find, career took off, then he made the transition to movies." The man nodded. "Frequently typecast as action heroes or villains in straight action films, as well as over-the-top villains in children's films. Something of a loner. And he spent a few of his summers in Hoshido during youth. What a guy."

With a roll of the eyes, Leo said, "How is he popular, though? He just gives the same performance over and over."

"Well if that's your attitude, I guess break time is over." Niles set down the sheets and grabbed the remote, turning the movie's volume up. "Give me a thousand more push-ups before the movie ends."

"Ugh…"

Later that night, Leo allowed Sakura into the apartment. She winced as it became apparent to her that this was a very small domicile. "This place is small… Uh, not that that's bad! It's… cozy!" The second thing she noticed was that Leo had donned an apron over his usual clothes. "O-oh, you're cooking? You have a kitchen? Uh, I mean-"

Leaning on the counter, Niles grinned. "Wow. She makes as good a first impression as you do."

This incited a sigh from Leo, though Sakura took the bait. "Oh, hi. Um, Niles, isn't it?"

"That's me."

Leo put his hand on Sakura's shoulder. "Coat?" She nodded, taking her coat off and handing it to Leo. As he put it on the hanger, he spoke to Niles. "Weren't you going on some errands?"

Niles rolled his eye and put on his sunglasses. "Oh fine, I'll leave you kids alone. Heheh… Though we'll see what I walk in on when I come back…"

"Niles!"

The man left the two lovebirds alone, and Leo cleared his throat. "Well, then… Welcome. While this place may be small, it's… small."

She smiled at the honesty. "You could say it's as big as it needs to be."

Leo merely shook his head. "No, no I couldn't. But thank you for trying." He walked over to the kitchen. "To answer your question from earlier, yes I do cook. Normally I'd ask if you have any preference, but… we don't have a lot." The man winced as he looked through the cabinets. "…How does garlic bread sound?"

Sakura's eyes lit up. "Oh! Are we having pasta?"

"Uh…" Leo blinked. "No, I… I just meant the garlic bread by itself."

"O-oh…"

…

Half an hour later, Leo and Sakura sat together on the floor, with three plates. One for each of them, and one for the greater loaf of garlic bread. Sakura nodded. "Mmm, thish 'sh good," she said with her mouth full. "Th'nk yoo."

Leo observed how her reservations disappeared whenever food was involved. He swallowed his bite. "Yeah. I don't have a lot of ingredients, but I make them count. Heh…"

Then Sakura swallowed her piece of bread. "I've actually had this before!" She took another bite of her bread. "I l'v'd it." Swallow. "My family and I tried some garlic bread at a Nestran-styled restaurant." She giggled, and her cheeks turned pink. "I loved it so much. Haha, I'd actually eat so much of it that I couldn't save room for dinner!"

From the moment she actually laughed, Leo fell into a trance. He had to shake his head to snap out of it. "Oh… Well… glad you like it."

"I really do," Sakura nodded, smiling. "I always wanted to have nothing but garlic bread for dinner. Now I can!" She smiled. "Maybe I'll just get the recipe and do this every night."

Leo frowned. "Every night? That wouldn't be a good idea. You'd get tired of it. Not to mention, bread can make you fat."

"Bread makes you fat?!" Sakura repeated, spitting out some crumbs from her next bite.

…

The two sat close together as they watched a movie. They were huddling close, with Sakura leaning against Leo's shoulder, and his arm around hers. Despite this, she frowned. "Wait, what are they saying?"

"Yeah the scene's a bit quiet." Sakura sat upright to let Leo reach for the remote. It rested on the floor, some distance in front of them, and Sakura noticed something on the back of Leo's neck.

"Um, Leo?"

"Yeah?" He grabbed the remote and returned to his original position. Sakura seemed flustered, to Leo's bewilderment. "What's wrong?"

"The tag on your shirt… It's sticking out…" She shut her eyes. "Are you wearing your shirt wrong again?"

Leo blinked. He set the remote down, stood up, walked over to the bathroom, and shut the door. Sakura followed with her eyes. "Leo?"

Thump, thump

"I SCREWED UUUUUUUUUP!"

"L-Leo?" Sakura winced. "Are… are you okay?"

After a few seconds, Leo exited the bathroom, shirt on correctly, and sat down on the mattress, elbows resting on his knees. "…I'm sorry, did you want to talk about something?"

"Uh… I… I'm sorry I upset you…? I think?"

Leo sighed. "It's not you. It's… This isn't the first time that's happened." He looked up. "And I'm not talking about the party either."

"What happened?"

"I… One time I had another girlfriend. I don't really know how long it's been." (Leo knows it was around 430 days, give or take.) "We had a disagreement." (She brutally dumped him.) "Also I wore my shirt wrong, so now whenever it keeps happening, it reminds me of that." (Leo's inside-out shirt was the inciting incident to the final argument with his big ex.)

"Well… Why does it keep happening?" Sakura asked.

"I… I just like to get dressed quickly."

Velouria sat on Selkie's bed, in her messy bedroom with wall-to-wall River City Ransom merchandise. The Wolfskin watched as her friend dug through a bag of hair products. "I can't believe it! She got me right in the face with some kind of weird arrow thingy!"

"You look fine to me."

Selkie looked up from her task. "That's not the point! She's violent! She's gonna hurt Leo!" Back to digging. As she worked, she threw things out behind her. "She lured him in with her Hoshidan wiles, and now whenever he steps out of line, she'll probably shoot him! Or someone he loves! He's been tricked!"

"I… I don't think… Wait, didn't you attack her first?"

"Whose side are you on?!"

"…Hey, can I have the tube of dye when you're done?" Inquisitively, she narrowed her gaze. "How many did you get, anyway?"

…

Selkie rambled to herself, sticking her head under the bathtub faucet. "Was it my fault?! Am I too young?! Leo always did like sitting in place, maybe I should've tried that! That Sakura girl likes to sit in place too! Why are the gods punishing me for an active lifestyle?!"

As this happened, Velouria merely stood in the doorway, arms folded under her chest. "Hey… you know, I can't really hear you."

…

Finally, Selkie got a look at herself in the mirror. Her hair remained the same, but with a new pink streak in the middle, as pink as the hairs on Sakura's head. "Muahahaha! Now I can stand a chance at helping Leo escape that crazy lady!"

Velouria's eyes moved between her friend, and the used dye tube on the floor. "I can have that tube, right?"

…

The girls sat on Selkie's bed as Selkie texted a certain someone. Velouria winced. "How did you get that number?"

"I… uh…" Selkie opted to orphan her explanation in favor of continuing the message.

Selkie: OMG yung dryer you r cute we should b dating
Young Dwyer: …

"Your spelling is horrible."

"Shh, he's responding!"

Selkie: OMG yung dryer you r cute we should b dating
Young Dwyer: sure why not

Dressed for the cold weather, Leo and Sakura arrived near historic Fort Dragonfall. In the olden days, it was a fortress crafted from the remains of an ancient dragon. It was abandoned after a while, and now serves as a landmark for tourists to come and see. Tourists are allowed to visit from May through October, with special permission granted to the film crew currently present to shoot during April.

"We could've jumped through the Astral Plane… I wouldn't mind!" Sakura told Leo.

"Eh…" Leo was crabby. "Stupid Niles. Stupid Benny Lee... interrupting our date…"

"B-Benny Lee?" Sakura covered her mouth for a second. She stopped walking. "Leo you d-don't have to do this right now."

He turned back to Sakura, also stopping. "You said it yourself, didn't you? I have to defeat your evil ex-boyfriends?"

"M-my exes. Yes…"

"So he's gonna find me sooner or later." He shrugged. "I might as well. But, ah, what was he like?"

Sakura blushed. "It's… This whole thing is embarrassing. But I guess…" Her eyes turned to the sky, recollecting her time with Benny Lee. "Um… We met at a summer camp o-one time… He was nice. B-but then summer ended, so I-I realized it wouldn't work. And we broke up."

Leo put a finger to his chin. "Hmm. Niles was telling me that he spent a few summers in Hoshido."

"I only went to camp that one year…"

"Well, he's a movie star, now. I'm sure he's not that torn up about it. Gods forbid he ends up like that first guy…"

…

Niles held a coffee cup as Leo and Sakura joined him on the set. "All right, where is he?" Leo asked.

"Give him a second," said Niles.

The Universal Studios theme was audible as a large, intimidating man in a leather coat emerged from his trailer and went over to begin shooting.

Name: Benny Lee
Status: Famous

The director nodded. "Okay, 3, 2, 1, action!"

BOSS: BENNY LEE

Benny slammed his fist into his palm and glared ahead of him. A shady actor sitting atop a trained wyvern glared at him. "Let me tell you something. Your first mistake was getting on my bad side. Your last mistake… was not getting out of town."

Niles shook his head, grinning. "His one-liners are so cheesy. I love it."

Leo raised his eyebrow. "Hm. It just now occurs to me that you dated a movie star."

"W-well he wasn't a star back then…"

Benny glared and turned his gaze to Leo. "HEY! I'm talking to you, Mr. Leo!"

This caught Leo off-guard. "Wait what?"

"Man, why can't he talk to me?" Niles complained.

Benny promptly abandoned his scene and marched over to Leo. "I said your first mistake was to get on my bad side. And your last mistake was not getting out of town!" He grabbed Leo by the coat collar.

"Whoa there!"

"HYYYYA!" Benny spun Leo around and threw him into the distance. Niles sighed.

"It's like he didn't even see the boss title a minute ago. C'mon, Leo."

Leo tore through a cloth with a fake Nestran skyline, and slammed right into the 'nose' of the ancient dragon before tumbling to the ground. Benny looked over at Sakura. "Um… so how's it going?"

Sakura shied away from his glance. "I… I'm fine."

Benny shrugged. The director cut the scene short, allowing his star to make his way over to Leo's position. "Are you all right?"

Leo slowly got back to his feet. "Ugh… Good thing I did those extra push-ups…"

"Listen. I really don't want to fight," Benny said. "You seem like an all right guy, and I have better things to do than all that stuff with Tochika's league."

This caught Leo's interest. "League?"

Benny sighed and extended a hand, helping Leo stand up. "The League of Evil Exes. Sakura's last boyfriend gathered us all together and told us we had to avenge ourselves by destroying you."

"Ugh… So that's probably what that last guy's email was talking about."

"Odin?" Benny shook his head. "That guy scares me."

"Wait, I don't get it." Leo dusted off his clothes. "If you're such a nice guy, why are you doing this?"

"Well… I noticed a lot of the others were really hurt whenever Sakura came up. And I remember she hurt me. So I thought maybe I could talk you out of seeing her once I spare you."

"Uh-huh…" Leo massaged one of his temples. "Come on, it was summer camp, right? You weren't going to stay in Hoshido, it wasn't going to work out."

"Is that what she told you?"

Leo's eyebrow arched. "Uh, yes?"

"Well that's half true, at least." Benny cringed. "Want to know the real reason we broke up? Sakura already found someone else." Leo kept silent. "Yeah. My family was actually staying in Hoshido for a little longer, and she knew it. I tried to find Sakura again. But you know what I saw when I did?" He did not wait for Leo's response. "I saw her, cuddling up to that 'perfect' jerk!"

The movie star shrugged.

"He's in the league too, and she's dating you now. So I guess it didn't work out. But yeah."

"I…" A sigh. "Look, I'm sure she feels bad about it now. You were kids!"

"It's not important now. Look, if you really want to date Sakura, fine. But Tochika's gonna want something…" Benny scratched the back of his neck. "You have any gold coins? Give me all your gold coins, and I'll tell him you beat me. I'm a pretty good actor, as you know."

Leo waffled his hand. "Eh, so-so."

"…What?"

"I mean, you're all right, but I've seen your movies. You're usually one of the weaker actors."

The star said nothing at first. He cracked his knuckles and punched Leo again. Benny then stormed off. When Leo regained his energy, he caught sight of Benny's large figure and leather jacket and followed after him. "Hey! Don't just walk off like that!"

But when the man turned around, it was not Benny. Rather, it was a man who mostly resembled Benny Lee. Suddenly, Leo found himself surrounded by a trio of Benny Lee lookalikes. "Leo, meet my stunt doubles." The bassist looked up to find the real Benny standing atop Fort Dragonfall's 'nose'. "These guys help out when I can't do the job on my own. And that's the same here." He glared. "Get him, boys."

"Uh-oh."

"Hey Leo!" Leo and all the stunt doubles looked over to see Niles, a few meters away, still with his coffee. "Ask them if they like getting Benny's sloppy seconds."

"I'm a bit busy, Niles."

"Whatever," Niles waved his hand and walked off, and the stunt doubles all began attacking.

The nearest double threw a punch, but Leo knocked the fist away and kicked the double in the gut, flooring him. Another went at Leo from the side, but he turned and punched him in the face, then whipped around and hit a third guy in the face. The second double recovered and punched Leo in the back, while the third headbutted him. Leo shoved his elbow into the guy behind him, then punched the guy before him with the same fist. Then he grabbed the guy in front of him and swung him around, knocking over the other double before throwing him aside.

The original double got back up, and wrapped his arms around Leo before throwing him to the floor as Leo did to the three stunt doubles. Then all three began wailing on him.

Benny watched the entire thing unfold and yawned. He jumped down and began walking toward his trailer. "Those stunt doubles. Good people. I should get them coffee or something." As Benny made his escape, the level-up jingle was audible. "Huh?" Then an errant shoe hit the back of his head. "Ow! What the- Ohhh…"

He turned around and saw Leo, coat removed, standing in the center of a triangle of defeated stunt doubles. Leo rolled his shoulder and glared at Benny. "Are you ready for your close-up?"

The Evil Ex sighed and began charging for his opponent. Leo ran to face him head on. He prepared a punch, but Benny proved faster, shoulder-ramming Leo to the ground.

"Aaa….aaah."

"Sorry. Really, I'm sorry. But you know how it is," Benny said. "If you hold still, I'll make this quick."

Leo heard the growls of the nearby trained wyvern. "Uh, so you were a wrestler, right?"

"…Yeah?"

"Could you…" Leo spotted the wyvern at last. "Demonstrate on that wyvern?"

"You think I could bring myself to wrestle with that dragon? And hurt it?!"

"What? You're not gonna hurt it. I mean, that's how it works right? Wrestlers don't really-"

Benny tensed, holding his hands out. "Okay, stop breaking kayfabe! I'll do it! I just need some gloves."

Niles slid up beside Benny, tapping his shoulder. "Got your gloves. Big fan, by the way."

"Thank you." Benny put on the gloves and approached the wyvern. He ran at it, screaming. As Benny grappled with the dragon, it roared and took off to the sky.

"Oh… I thought that dragon was trained," Niles said, helping Leo stand up.

"Yeah, but I saw its trainer walk off during my fight with the stunt guys. Fun fact, wyverns constantly need their trainers present."

"Huh."

Leo and Niles watched Benny and the wyvern go high above the clouds.

Boom.

KO!

+2000 pts!

A decent amount of gold coins rained down on the spot where the wyvern had once rested. Leo snapped his fingers. "Gah! I should've asked him what he knew about the other ex-boyfriends. He might've actually told me."

"Live and learn," Niles summarized. "I'm gonna go brag that Benny Lee's last words were spoken to me."

Leo looked around. "Wait, where's Sakura?"

Niles joined Leo in his eyes-only search. It appeared that Sakura was no longer at the fort.

The next day at Leo and Niles' place, Leo had planted himself in the armchair, and spent the entire morning staring at his phone. "What is her deal? Where is she?"

Niles sat on the floor, playing the SNES. "Maybe she decided she hates you."

"Thank you, Niles."

Didididididing!

Leo perked up. "Aha! Finally!"

"Wait, isn't your ringtone for Sakura more like-"

"Hello?"

"Hey Leo. It's been a while."

Leo's eyes shot wide open. His jaw practically dropped. Niles looked over his shoulder (turning his head further to compensate for the eye) and observed Leo's shocked state. "Oh no… It's her, isn't it?"

The blond gulped, and blankly nodded.

"H-hello again… Luna."

[CHAPTER 2 CLEAR! WOULD YOU LIKE TO SAVE?]

Post-Script A/N:

So with this second chapter, I start incorporating more elements from the comic. Also I think someone else had the idea of Leo and Sakura dream-dating. But y'know, Scott Pilgrim.

Scarlet is playing the role of Scott & Kim's high school friend, Lisa. Something about Lisa's presence in the whole story for me is that she just seems... not real. A ghost. I don't know why. Scarlet kind of gives me that vibe too, so I cast her. Velouria as Selkie's friend seemed like a clear transition of Knives having that more sensible friend. In the comic, Kim has a fellow employee and friend named Hollie. Here, that's Camilla's role, mostly to help work in another of Leo's family. Xander and Garon are referenced too. Benny as Lucas Lee is because Benny and Comic!Lucas are both surprisingly nice people. And at long last, Leo's big ex is Luna, better known as Selena, better-yet known as Severa. Mostly because she has Envy's red hair.

I changed around the order of events, which is going to be a thing, going forward. In the second comic, the Lucas Lee fight was barely an event. Just one scene, and then the last third of the book was Knives ambushing Ramona, and the Demonheads having their performance. Here, I made sure that Benny's fight was still the climax of the chapter. Benny's attitude is like the comic version of Lucas, but events play out more like the movie version.

Also, Corrin is revealed as the pen pal who told Sakura to come to Nohr. She had no clue any of this would happen. Between unintentionally bringing Sakura and Leo together, and bringing Niles and Silas together, she's an accidental matchmaker. She really is a player insert after all. Also, the movie that Niles and Leo watch is a reference to a Sakura/Leo (and Xander/Mozu) fic called Princess and the Pauper. Go look at it. (It also has some tiny Scott Pilgrim references in spite of its premise.) And Leo screaming "I SCREWED UP" is a One Punch Man joke, because Max Mittelman.

Also a bit of modern-day Nohr worldbuilding in this chapter, so have fun with that.

Enjoy.